This is my story.

It's about Love.
How I learned, how I failed.
How I laughed and how I cried;
Yesterdays Memories & Todays Thoughts......

As I said before, this isn't going to be a biography.
I just wanna tell you how a person can change.
Change in a positive way....

Telling you my story, I'll be honest.
Honest with you & honest with myself.

As a child I realy was a little "disaster" to my parents and to my sister I think.
Hearing stories 'bout that time tells me enough.
But being a child, I wasn't aware of being such a nuicance.
Sure, I was fun too sometimes, but most of the time I behaved like a "spoiled" child.
Even though I wasn't the "perfect" child, my parents loved me unconditionally.

I grew up and got another view on life.
As a Dutch girl, studying English in London, my journey began.

It was there that I met Don.
We fell in love and shared our home.
I was only 17 at that time.
Soon I found out, the guy I fell in love with was a drug-addict.
From him I learned how to love someone and in the same time be scared of the same person.
I had a real rough time.

As I believe anything happens with a reason, this must have a reason for me too.
I did not know what though.
But I was sure, Time would Tell !

Things got real bad and my fathers' best friend -he lived in Kent- warned me daddy and as soon as he heard,
he took the first flight to London to pick me up.
He got there; not even angry, only concerned about me.
I did'nt have to come home with him if I did'nt want to; it would be my choice.
He offered my boyfriend to come with us so he could go to a clinic in the Netherlands.
This he would not do.

I found out he only loved himself.
What I also saw, was that my Dad loved me very much.
And I learned the difference between those two.
The selfish & the unselfish love.

At this time I found out what I thought important being friends,
and how my "friends" thought about this.
And I felt alone.....

Then I met HIM, the guy who later would become my hubby
We had our Ups & Downs like all Lovers probably have.
Again I learned about another kind of LOVE.
Love so honest, pure & solid as a rock !
I learned that Real Love DOES mean you can rely on somebody,
trust somebody and totally be yourself with somebody.
We are together for nearly twenty years now
Six years we lived together & then got married on
September 16th, 1988.

Out of Love, our two children were born.
Two beautiful girls; Sanne & Tanja
Now I learned why Love for your own children is Unconditional.
I don't know how to put it in words, but I know how it feels.....

While Sanne was only nine months, my mum came in hospital, having breast cancer.
During her life, we had this love/hate relationship,
cause she was an alcoholic.
After she died I felt love again for her;
she had had to fight her own battle in life, a thing I did not see before.
But now I did & I could forgive her.

Updated September 17th 2002
To be continued.....