 Welcome to my world. 1November2002 *sigh* today was Mai's birthday! Happy Birthday grl. love you. *smiles* daymmmm... I'm crushing big time on someone. *wink* thanks to Delight *muahz* grl cuz she was the one that introduced us... went out like at 6... then ummm went to go get Delight and Linda (her lil sis) and then pick up some guys. lol... cruised around for 3 hours straight... then had an hour left and went to Bubble Bliss Cafe... it was nice and cozy and fun... we were probably like the loudest group in there... =P but it's all good... I'm really glad to have met Delight... she's such a nice person.. *gag* unlike some people... you know what I'm talking bout Delight... just between me and you grl. =P haha I have to admit... I did have fun... hehe it was koo... met some new people... at least I'm meeting really "good" people and not with the lowdown bishes... but anywaise... yea I came home an hour late... and my parents made such a huge deal out of it... shooo... now I can't go to the Vaj and Moua New Year! *sigh* and I promised Douacee and Z I was gonna try to make it... but nopez... welp... I'm grounded! can you believe it??? grounded!!!! ahhh... sigh... they didn't tell me for how long... I guess I'll just have to be patient and wait and wait and wait til they forget about it... I can understand that they're my parents and they worry and all... but daym... I've gone out so many times and came home so late and I never saw them making such a big deal out of this... but oh well *shrugs* I need to stop going out so much anywaise... and take a break... for how long? you might ask.. I don't know.. maybe a month? let's just wait til Christmas arrives... we'll see what's gonna happen... *smiles* just be glad I didn't get in sooooo much trouble right? hehe yep yep... 29October2002 *oooy* god dammit... I thought it would be just a few days that I can live without talking to Chor. *sigh* but I've been going fuucken insane... driving me nuts to see him with other grls at school errzz... I know we not going out or anything but it seems like he wanna make me jealous??? *pulls hair* shiet... tomorrow would be one whole fucken week that we havent talk to each other... I just hope that our friendship isn't gonna end over something pathetic like this... I didn't mean to make him mad... I was just trying to get my point across and when my point was finally across he gets mad about it... *sigh* I know that Chor doesn't bother to read my online journal... but Chor if you are reading this... then I'm sorry... you should know how I am by now... and I do know how you are too... but I guess both of our anger should never combine together otherwise it's just gonna be... ummmm... can't seem to find the right word at the moment... but anywaise... I'm sorry... 24October2002 today was an okay day I guess... Asian Club was selling eggrolls... we sold it all some people were complaining that they didn't get any since we sold out. hehe Me and Chor kinda arguing... we're not talking right now... hmmm? why? because he was being a bitch yesterday when we were making eggrolls... *sigh* we were arguing over stupid shyt but then he got mad and gave me an attitude and then he threw Mai's pictures down on the desk.. and he walked out on me... and so today I didn't talk to him... when me and Jenny brought the eggrolls in... he was walking pass by us going to class... and he was like ooo you guys are gonna be late... I just walked on and didn't say anything to him... then he was giving an attitude and was like what's wrong with you Elizabeth? I just ignored his ass and kept on walking... *sigh* when I came home yesterday... I was complaining and whining about it to Jenny (since she was spending the night) I felt bad for making him angry... and then I was planning to talk to him today... but when I saw him... I just got madd all over again... *errz* if I could say sorry for making my phone buddy madd at me... but what's the point? Chor is so stubborn... he's also very short tempered... ahhhhh *sniff*sniff* I feel really badd... but I'm still mad at him... wellz... I guess I gotta go sit on my bed and hold my teddy bear and think what to do now... 20October2002 hmmmm??? yesterday was *Sweetest Day* me, Jenny, Kanie, Bao, Kennedy, and Kou went to Northland... us gurls took pixtures and the guys just waited for us. =P it was alright... not too boring or too fun. blah. I like my pictures though. new and improved me again *smiles* yellow is starting to become one of my favorite colors. hehe the group pictures are nice too though. I actually took studio pictures with my grls. *finally* lolz. saw Gowhnou there. I didn't know she worked there til I saw her behind the counter! but that's koo though. I know someone that works there! lol (I'm a dork I know) but anywaise... hmmmz... after we took pixtures... went shopping. they closed Contempo *sniff*sniff* that was my favorite store too. errrzz... or maybe they moved it??? *but oh wellz. I ended up spending at Fox Moor instead. got myself a pair of jeans. *smiles* so cute. hehe I think I was the only one who spended money. Kanie and them didn't buy anything. Next week I'm gonna get that one purse I saw. it's really really cute!!! *sigh* I kinda feel guilty though... because it's alwaise Mom that's giving me money... next week I'm gonnabother Dad for money *muahaha* but seriously... am I spoiled??? I think I am... I really do need to stop expecting so much... but then... I can't break the habit... *sigh* I just like to spend and spend and spend... I admit... I'm a shopaholic... but hey there are many gurls out there who probably spends more than me... so nanana I'm not the only one. lol I'm in a good mood today... yep yep life is fine for me... but then for my love ones... I don't get it... they're all so sad and fustrated... I seem like as if I'm the only one who is actually happy and enjoying my happiness.... hmmmm... Ionoz what to do... because they won't let me help them... but you know what??? I feel like this world is in reverse... because whenever I'm sad or depressed... everyone is happy and enjoying their life... but now... when I am happy!!! everyone is sad and fustrated... weird huh? *sigh* I think this'll be it for now...      13October2002 what kind of friend am I??? *sigh* I can never seem to help a friend when they're in need. but then when I need a friend they alwaise know what to do. I rely on my friends way too much but when they try to come to me for help I can never seem to find an answer... all I can do is try to comfort them... I'm such a selfish bitch... last night I cried on the phone with Douacee. she's having her family problems... I try so hard to understand... but all I could say was I understand... and for Lizzy. sigh... all I could say was yea... it's ok I mean.. daym what's wrong with me??? I can think of good advices but when I try to say it out it never comes out right... life shady every single minute... I mean what the hell??? at first I needed a life right? and now that I have a life... sigh... it's just so hard to explain... I feel like if I get myself involved into one more thing... I'm gonna go crazy... time... that's what matters the most right now... I don't wanna be sitting home like a bum doing nothing... I wanna go out there and be a part of the world... which I kinda am... but I wanna be fully out there... but something's holding me back... I'm afraid... of what? I don't know... all I know is that I'm afraid... maybe I'm afraid of the whole world that's out there...  11October2002 dance,dance, and dance =P yep yep that`s fo sho. lolz. after school for three hours straight. ahhh. my legs hurt. not really. not that I`m complaining. ehehe but anywaise... *ahem* Chor??!! are we going bowling??? cuz I`m still confused. so hey! Ken, Adam, Chor, Jenny, and whoever wut we doing tomorrow night?? shooo I wanna sleep in all day but noooo Chor wanna go play all day. that nikka. ahaha *crazy* hmmz... oh yea. I gotta make Lizzy a new layout for her page... yep yep... daym. I forgot my history test review sheet for the history test on Monday. *sigh* I guess I`ll do it the first thing in first hour? *scratches head* oh yea! got the homecoming pixtures today. if you nosy people wanna peep it out----> click here kk. *smiles* I should have taken pixtures the very first time I had came in. When we took that pixture it was about 2 hours after all that dancing. *not a very smart thing to do* *pulls hair* next occasion will be much better I promise *smiles* that was the only formal picture that I took with my gurls, Samantha and Mai. regular pixtures are still to be developed and posted =P 10October2002 I was too tired from the picnic yesterday to get my ass online and typed down my thoughts *sorry* but welp. now let`s begin starting from yesterday shall we? =P things were so unorganized but then it all worked out =D that`s a good thing. thank god ahaha hmmm... lots of people were there. everyone was having fun. esp. the bois. poor Chor. he hurted his leg from playing basketball =) hehehe I had my fun. was playing tagg with Adam and Kashia and them =P lolz. we`re high school people but hey gotta have some kiddie fun right? and yep *smiles* we did. sigh. we didn`t leave Stephens Park til like 8:30 last night. then went cruising around. Adam was messed up. couldn`t even wrestle me down anymore. lolz. I was so tired. I fell asleep on Chor when we were dropping him off at his house. ehehe hmmmz... today another ac meeting. it was a short one. but that`s ok. and since Jenny had to take her test after that I decided to stay with her so Ken could give me a ride *smiles* thanks Ken =) him and David and Chor went driving around while me and Jenny got out of the school after she got done with her test. we waited half and hour for them foos to get back. =P shooo. it was kinda chilly too. since dance practice was canceled I decided to come home early. Mom was gonna pick me up at 5 but then I got home at 4:30. when I came, only Lee and Dad were home?? where`s Mom?? and Alex?? hmmmz. they already left the house to go get me. oops =P they`re not even home yet. so I called Mom on the cell and told her I was home. I`m probably gonna hear her trip again. uh ohz. *sigh* but that`s ok =) hehe 8October2002 I am so tired. ahhh my right thigh hurts. someone wanna massage it for me please? sniff sniff it's been killing me all day today. dance practice at Kry's house was canceled. since we couldn't find half of the group. but it's okie. hehe tomorrow's the picnic. yay. I gotta bring my jacket with me tomorrow. it's gonna be at Stephens Park at 2:30. after school I probably might just go chill or somethin... dunnoz yet. or might go see mom. since I haven't talk to her for a while. yep yep. not my real mom. my 2nd mom. i don't wanna get into it cuz it's a really really long story. lol but anywaise. lalala it's so boring. there's nothing to do. I think Jenny's mad at me?? scratches head. we both weren't paying much attention to each other last night when we were talking on the phone. she called me and woke me up. but that's okie. I was kinda sleeping while she was talking. (sorry but I was seriously exhausted!!) but hey best friend are alwaise there for each other right? but today... hmmmz Ionoz. I don't kinda really care because right now I'm just focusing on my life as well. shyt... too many essays and researches. ahhhhh *pulls hair* sigh... *zZzZzZz* I'm bout to fall alsleep on the comp now. ahaha ^_^ 7October2002 dance practice today hehehe it was fun. I was kinda being a smartass today though. even though I didn`t mean too. sigh. my legs kinda hurt. but I think I can handle it. coach made me lead the moves in front of the class. we were practicing the moves to Janet Jackson All for You it was okie. hehe thank god Melissa came up to the front with me and helped me along the way. sigh hehe hmmm... anything else going on today? not really. I forgot to bring my history homework home today. ahhh >_< guess I`ll just have to do it tomorrow in the morning. lalala hmmm dang I forgot what I was gonna say. *I`m such a dork* hehe oh yea. me and Jenny made a deal. since Sweetest Day is coming up. (next weekend!!!) *pulls hair*lolz meand Jenny made a deal that I`ll find her a sweetheart and she`s gonna find me a sweetheart. sigh. we did that last year but it didn`t really work out. so now for sure this year it will work out... she gave me a hint though... I wonder who is it... hmmmm??? scratches head... hehe I hope that it`s not anyone that`s ugly sorry if I sound mean... hmmm.. come to think of it every guy that I know isn`t ugly so I guess I don`t have to worry about it? hehe sigh... I`m listening to the song... but then I kinda forgot some of the dance moves already! ahhh *pulls hair* shooooo 6October2002 I am so tired. I didn`t even do my homework. errrzz... as much as I hate procrastinating... I can`t help it. hehe sigh. last night, Jenny came over.. daym... Ken went somewhere so we didn`t go to the dj party. sigh. that sucks. bad. seriously. anywaise. nothing to do. my hair is still wet. I wanna go put it up.. but then I have to blow dry it. and then right now I`m too lazy to do that. sigh. I have to get my homework done. but... it`s so hard... I mean it`s not hard but just confusing? scratches head... mmmm.. Mommy`s cooking. I`m getting hungry now. hehe I have to think of a layout for my main page but ummz... I don`t know what to do with it. yep yep... lack of creativity. ahhh. I gotta get my brain to start working but there`s so much stress and things and so little time... hmmm.. I guess I`ll just have to think of something fast... hehe my nails are getting longer. lol I actually stopped biting my nails for two weeks. it`s a really bad habits. and what also motivated to stop biting my nails because of Chor and his nails lmao... his nails are longer than mine. that butthead. hehe he`s such a workaholic. and I`m just a bum. staying home broke. lolz. I`m not broke. not at the moment anywaise. hehehe Daddy`s princess woot woot. yep yep. ahaha alwaise get my way or else... sniff sniff 5October2002 just finished blow drying my hair. yep yep... hmmm... today is the yak town new year. and tonight is the dj party *whew* so many events going on today. =) daym... I`m talking to Jenny on the phone right now and she said Ken don`t wanna go to the dj party cuz he complaining bout lots of shiet. ahaha crazy nikka =P fine then Ken!!! errrz. sigh. then wut are we going to do tonight??? scratches head... I have no clue whatsoever. it`s up to Kennedy since he is the driver. yep yep. well... lemme see if I can get a reach of Chor and/or Adam. those two troublemakers. ahaha I don`t think they know what we gonna do today... I wonder if Chor gotta work today? let me find out... Jenny doesn`t know. Ken said maybe. who knows. but I ain`t gonna call. scared of his parents. lol I`m scared of everyone`s parents. not unless I really know them. sigh. I wonder what Shawn`s doing??? I haven`t talk to him since my homecoming party. hmmm... Monday I have dance practice after school. ahhhh... I know I`m gonna be hella tired. shooo... finally!!! I got a letter from Lizzy!!! I got it yesterday. lolz. took two whole weeks for that letter to get here. how wierd. errrz. that grl is crazy lol because she told me last night that she gonna send me another letter. I`m thinkin like wut??? another one already??? lol. but it`s all good. I wrote a lot to her too. hehe 4October2002 this week has gone by kind of... ummm... well... not too fast or too slow, so I guess you can say I had a normal week? nope. normal doesn`t seem to fit either. hmmm... but oh well. who cares. just another week going by. sigh. my ass hurts. lol frealz. shooo... first Ray then Jordan. and make sure you note this: those two bishes are strong! =P but it`s okie. I have the whole weekend to relax. well... ummm... actually tomorrow night I can`t. gonna be tappin that ass at the dj party. woot woot. ahaha brought to you by holla holla productions. hehe yep yep. me, Kennedy, Jenny, Adam, ummm and maybe Chor and whoever gonna go with us too. I think we might go. or if not (since Chor and Kennedy complaining that Southfield is too far) we might just go out cruising and movies and blah blah. the usual stuff. =) but ummz. daym. I failed my history test. shiet... but don`t trip. I wasn`t the only one. the whole class failed it too. so it`s not that I`m stupid. the teacher just makes learning complicated. and of course. history is suppose to be the easiest subject of all. errrz... we should have had the asian picnic today. but we had to cancel cause it was gonna rain. oh well. sigh. next Wednesday is our half day. and so we`re gonna go after school =D I think this`ll be it for now... kk *smiles* 3October2002 *smiles* ahaha today was fun. but hella freezing =P asian club meeting today after school. but it was a short one. hehe yep yep. daym... fucken white bois wannastart shyt witthe asian bois. lmao. they gonna get their ass kick. that`s fo sho. ahaha one kidd already got beat up. ehehe I find it amusing. the highlite of my day was after school. went crusing around wit Ken,Jenny, and Chor. Adam had football practice so we went out and crusied around waitin til his practice was over. hehe we went to Stephens Park and played around. dang I was so clumsy. I tripped. ahaha it was cold esp since I was wearing a sleeveless shirt =P then umm after a while we went back to fitz and chill there. practice was almost over too. got a chance to see Trang and Sheena too =) they were going to the library. hmmm... when practice was over, we saw Adam running to the locker room to change. that nikka changed pretty fast. lolz then I had my window rolled down and I was talking shyt to him. lmao he was walking towards me and I tried to put up my window. but then I forgot that my door was unlocked so heran and open the door and we were pretending to fight. lol I got out of the car and was walking toward him and then he ran towards me and picked me up and threw me into the air! ahhhh then he just carried me around and threw me into the air as if I was nothing. hehehe =P I`m still gonna get you for that Adam!!! ahaha Chor and them were so mean. they just sat there in the car laughing their asses off. *frowns* but it`s okie. hehe that was the highlite of my day. since today was so gloomy and everything. =) 2October2002 I got homework to do today =( that succs. that really does. hmmm... wut happen today...? lunch time, Chor came up to me and told me that Kanou (his gurlfriend) hates him. because some guy? told her that he was messing with other gurls at the homecoming football game?? he was?? *scratches head* he was just chilling with me, Jenny, Samantha, and Chee (his sister) that was about it... hmmmm =/ none of my business. I feel so bad today. cuz in art class, that new guy Joe (Nixon`s andFeng`s cousin) came and sat at the next table near me. everyone was at the door ready to go out and so it was just me and him (oOoLaLa) *jokes* but then I felt kinda awkward and so I just walked away without saying anything to him. I`mm sorry Joe. I didn`t mean to be a bitch and ignore you like that =) other than that... I`m feeling good and much more relax. not so much tension or anything... hehe and I`m glad. but anywaise... this`ll be it for now 1October2002 if you say "REALiTY CHECK". what you need to do is actually check yourself and realize what the hell you`re doing. if you haven`t noticed by now, somebody`s got to tell you. and I did. you have to change. cause if not, the people who truly care for you might not always be there the next day. don`t take things like this for granted. that was just a thought. now let`s see... a lot of drama been going on. but fuck it. ain`t gonna bother with it no more. sigh... today. I just realized I`ve had a true friend all along. and come to think about it. he is actually the only true friend I have... he can always bringa smile to my face...I don`t know what I`ll do without him... he nevered turned his back on me (unlike some people)... and plus... if I ever lose him... no wait... I will never lose him hehe *muahz* I love you Denta thank you for being such a great friend =)
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