1.
A typical date includes:
Dinner and a movie
Breakfast the next morning
A date? What's that?
Being paid for services rendered |
2.
Being Drunk means:
I don't get drunk
An excuse to be horny
If you can't remember it, It didn't happen
Services are on the house |
3.
My last few ex's:
I don't have any
I am still friends with
Want to gut me like a fish
I still sleep with
couldn't afford me |
4.
First Base is:
A kiss
A kiss with Tongue
Head
$3.95 per minute |
5.
Having a boyfriend/girlfriend means:
a meaningful intimacy and companionship
eating a side salad before ordering a suitable main course
eternal damnation in gay hell
bad for business |
6. Support groups
are a great way to:
find support and friendship
recruit people into your black book
make yourself feel better
market yourself to potential clientele |
7. Clubs are a great
way to:
go and have fun with friends
find a nightly trick
relieve some daily tension
solicit " your" goods and services |
8. Hypothetically
speaking, if you were having sex and you orgasm
before the other person does. What do you do:
Take time to fulfill their desires.
Pretend to fall asleep.
Leave the change on the dresser and get the fuck out.
Don't get paid. |
9. A nickname your
friends would most likely call you:
Angel
Cum-guzzling Whore
Shore Leave
Good Suckie Fuckie |
10. You spend more
time:
Helping others
Helping others find love
Helping others find their clothes
Helping others find their Visa card cause your ass swiper doesn't take
Discover |
11. My idea of a
great one night stand:
I really don't do those
When they don't call back the next day
What, I had sex- with you? I must've been too trashed to remember
When they pay you ahead of time |
12. I have used
the following break up line(s):
I love you but I'm not in love with you
You were a good fuck, but my hand is just way better
I don't know if I'm gay, I might want to have a husband/wife one day
It's not you, it's my new fuck buddy
Hey, you wanna fuck once more for old times sake?
What, you thought we were (boy/girl)friends?
Your last check bounced, so ciao! |
13. Things you've
said during sex:
Don't move, you bitch
Could you hurry up with that?
Suck stupid, blow's an expression
There's something in there? I can't feel it!
Wow, that didn't require any lube!
Are you done yet? |
14.
After really bad sex you:
say "You weren't that bad, gag, yes you were"
Give them your sex enjoyment rating on a 1-10 scale
say nothing and just not call EVER AGAIN
Break up with them
Charge them double |
15. Longest realtionship
you've ever had:
I've never had one
More than 1 year
6 months or more
Less than 6 months |
BONUS
SHADE QUESTIONS
Have
you ever done any of the following:
Made out with a guy/girl on video at a party and not remember it because
you were trashed
Slept with a guy/girl just to have a warm body in the bed (pulse optional?)
Given hand jobs to people you don't like very much
Stopped talking to someone because they became unfuckable
Been to Gay.com looking for a "date"
Ever had a screen name which included the words, "big, hot, sexy,
fli, stud, 69, vixen" |
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