this is the place I’ve chosen to use to voice my little opinion when ever i need it. not today
"light my candles in a daze cuz I’ve found god"
.god, if i start to talk about god , i think i may ramble forever. quickly i will expel some thoughts. i believe Christians are kidding themselves, i think there has to be something out there, beyond these 25 million galaxies of ours. But this "great divine" people are talking about it just a croc. people die all the time , wars-look at Islam and Palestine , this shit has been going on for over 2oo years, you think this "Christian, all holy , all knowing, all mighty"of yours was planning this , he's up there in his white robe holding his golden scepter of knowledge saying "yes, that is exactly how this is supposed to go , all these innocent people should be blown up" for what then god? . What i believe in is known by no name, we don't give a face or a gender or a book of things "he" thinks are right.
we are all just living. we make our own destiny (how cliche')but its true ,dont blame this imaginary "god" for what we've done to ourselves
Churches are lined in gold and it is a cult. we bow. we sing. we praise. we hand our money to the church , so we have a more comfortable place ,to spend and hour preying, reflecting, worshipping. i think if this "god" of gods ,was real , he wouldn't want you to spend your money on useless shit like a fancy church (along with the copies amount of money we spend on entertainment, clothes ,anything to impress) ,this god ,this yawah, this father ,this "savior" would want you to put your money out for use.
that is all for the day . i have much more but i will save it.
New day
i dislike magazines of almost any stature. I was at 711(fuckin eh) and there's all these "manly" magazines with pictures of half naked chicks, what will this teach younger generations. beauty magazines are the same way, training the mind to believe there is a certain way we should be. damned nation.
new day
breasts are toys. we are all tools.
new day
i hate Harry potter. not the books ,don't get me wrong ,but all the advertisement, talk about corporations milking something for what its got. so people liked Harry potter, you look at any kind of store, there are tremendous amounts of garbage being sold with the name on it. it was cute at first, not it angers me.
funny that I’m saying this one, considering im using a website to say all this bologna. peoples reliance on computers, i use mine every now and then to check me e mail and now that we have this crappy thing im on it more often. but people are so goddamn lazy, im afraid for the future. palm pilots, cell phones, dvd players, satellite TV all this crap that people think they "need".what a croc.
infomercials and almost all advertising, I had mono for two weeks and i watched an abundance of TV (i don't watch TV, That's why im mentioning it) but all this crap that is sadly being sold and what people will believe .funny ,sad and frightening.
people in north America wonder why there is so many eating disorders. and the answer is obvious. So watching TV , i could not believe all the shit the world is pumping into our heads. ad after ad for different weight loss techniques (if you want to call them that) all these things : bally total fitness , ab tronic (a few different kinds at that) weight loss drinks ...all this shit ,there were at least 15 different things. then there are these videos and all this shit with "beautiful" people. pisses me off. SHIT!
my biggest problem with the world is the image. people take one look at a person and categorize them with whatever they may appear as, we all do it. *i will escape the image*
what's the deal with teenagers? being one even ,i am confused. always so willing to side, and have one idea about everything. what a generalization.
new day
GUNS ARE FOR LOOSAHS! i think guns may be the number one on my "things i hate about the world" list.
the words "love"and "hate" are used to freely. i am one who uses the word hate freely , but not love. i guess they contradict each other , i guess that says im full of hate, i don't really think i am.
i love food, and some people
. i hate guns ,i cant say i really hate any one, or even really dislike them/.accept Martha Stewart, there is a strong dislike there. blasphemy.
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so, I haven't written for awhile, i knew wed get bored of this, especially me im rather computer illiterate, and when the whether is nice, i wont stay inside. and you shouldn't either. so my rant. yesterday, my school did this thing called "starvathon" .its where we raise money for Haiti and don't eat from like 2 till 11 (which i think is sort of dumb in itself, how are we supposed to know what its like in like 9 hours) ANYWAY. since i go to a catholic school, they think its a good idea to kind of recreate the way "Jesus" lived. basically , they have a room with candles, you sit on the floor ,they give you a dinner roll and water. well ,This year its appalled me (and also a friend called pudge) that they gave us bottled water. oh yeah , i forgot to tell you , before hand we saw a presentation on how much water people have kin Haiti(30-50 liters a day, for everything ,plus having to run a farm) and also how parasite ridden the water is causing diseases that kill. so ,seeing this bottles water in front of us, didn't symbolize how "Jesus" lived ,it symbolized our wealth and our greed ,and even these "ever so admirable Christians" were a cause. we had at least 450 perfect bottles of clear parasite free water , that could of been shipped to Haiti, we wont die from having to drink tap water. to me it just shows arrogance on the schools part. hypocrites.
BE FREE. DON'T BE LUKEWARM. SMILE. DON'T HATE. LET YOURSELF JUST "BE",YA KNOW? DON'T FIGHT.
NEW DAY:
So, William Goldings theory was that people are not innocent and well meaning by nature. this i do not believe , but people really are shitty. Being a teenager, there is always that pressure to fit in (that of which i try to avoid) , people are such sheep, and i don't even mean how they dress or what they like .People will do anything to fit in (i don't know how to explain this anger!).People fight. People fight so people will fit in , i will not sway that or take it back ,it is the truth. They fight so that people will be like "way to go man!". So many people make me so mad, i don't even know them .people who are assholes by nature. "fuck them" - some dudes thought at starvathon, why did he come? community service hours? .
People are so shitty. they appear in my school to an abundance. Its only how i feel. I think strongly "boo violence" ,we have an assembly about violence, yes people listen ,people are silent but when we leave the cafe its like it never happened. there is always a person standing behind me contradicting everything i believe, and a group attached to him ,laughing.
GENERALIZATION OF THE DAY:
teenagers (maybe people in general) are inconsiderate think one of my biggest "pest peeves" is people who litter, and so many people do it ,it makes me sad more than anything ,cuz i know i cant ever control it, or change anything. realization of how its always been. next to my school ,where all the fools smoke there cool cigarettes, there is an unbelievable amount of garbage .and it pisses me off, there is also a garbage can right there, it is on a hill that turns into a forest (a forest that is quite nice to sit in ,there is a stream, and trees, dead trees, but they are there)anyway hill and a forest ,all this garbage slides down to the bottom and covers the hill. WHY?
Theory: people are shitty bastards by nature, but only the ones who will let themselves.
Advice: Don't be like everyone is just cuz its easy
that is all
NEW DAY:
you know what i think: i think no body will ever be happy or satisfied. talking about the war in Afghanistan a while back, we got so deep into conversation that everyone was tired of it. some were saying it is good we gat "revenge",but the thing is ,there looking for bin laden, once they find him it’ll be over. but say he is dead in a cave somewhere, the fighting will go on for say 8 more months till they find him. tell me, what are they achieving? People cry because 9 American soldiers have died (not that it shouldn't be recognized) but how many Moslems have died? Do they honestly think that they were ALL in on it? The taliban government is holding back and is non negotiable, but still is that the peoples fault, it is there problem ,cuz they're getting killed for it. I just don't understand what they think they'll get out of it. The U.S is trying to show the Afghanistan's that they cant mess with them. it is a cycle, that wont end, not ever. and there is nothing that i can do ,or you can do , cuz the us and taliban governments are both wanting "power",and they are idiots for it. damn government. and that's all i have to say about that .
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You know, now a' day everybody thinks that you've got to go to university to be successful .and i guess it all has to do with what kind of success you want. Like say to you success is a million dollars you go to university, your unhappy, but your "successful".
i was doing my course selection today , and i have four arts ,one science, one English one math and stupid useless religion and i am happy with that , but looking at it , it was commented that it was an "easy" year ,which i think is silly. I am going to go to college (unless of course my plans change) and to me , that is just fine , im proud for the ambition.
even like 15 years ago you’d be praised for going to college :"good job" "way to make something out of yourself". but now its like "oh, only college?" and there are so many people to stand by and judge, and don't think im just talking about adults who had it easier in school , even some people i know at my school ,peers, and you’d think they’d catch my drift.
no support for the arts. its all about academics and going to school . i for one, will not jump into an Armani suit and grab a brief case and sit in an office. its just not me, and that's what i think i want to get across to these people, i will have my own kind of success, weather im a writer or a struggling artist or an antique restorer or anything. i will make my mistakes , but id rather have mistakes than follow the old worn out path.
It has been eons since i last wrote. today being July the 12th. i have a new theory. i think that no matter what the situation, an argument say , i don't think approaching it negatively will get you anywhere.
that is all. For now
today is august 17th (im going to so oasis today. yay) . Anyway. there is an on going argument between rachel, my boyfriend and I about the word "pop". The word pop describing music (to me) means any teenybopper music. The term "pop" in general doesn't mean anything in the world that is popular (in that case there would be no use for the word at all) It means mainstream, played on the radio on much music
I just needed to clear that up for those of you who are confused (i.e.. jaimie godard) (tee hee).
I went to see Bob Dylan for my birthday (rachel bought me tickets how sweet that girl is..) It was good, but it makes me sad to know that he is so old now his music style and voice have changed alot. It makes me sad. He played only few older songs but he played them in his country-rock style (that of which he has today) and it wad disappointing. How i wish i lived in the 60's. Bobby D wrote great music with great lyrics. You guys should check him out. Also a guy named Jonah who goes as onelinedrawing...he has a beautiful personality and attitude and makes beautiful music. (He was also lead singer in a band called far, wicked cool music). Life would be so different without music. I don't think id be the same person, i don't think anyone would be the same, i mean i think wed all be "the same", dig?
hi kids. The new thing i don't like is Chris bozza. i don't know if anyone will read this, or if anyone knows him, but he is an idiot. His opinions completely differ from mine, so i don't like him.ha. I can’t explain right now. In due time
NEW SHIT:
It’s been a long long while since I’ve written anything. It is April 20th. I have a few things to say. I kind of find it hard to rant without aw debate right now. Let me tell you a little story about "lack of debate":
So a couple weeks ago i went on my friends bands website and wrote some silly thing saying he was a poser. His friends went ballistic. There were about 4 days of "debating" (in my opinion, challenge of character in theirs). It was funny. Ryan was the name of the guy I was arguing with. We fought about the punk fashion, anarchy, the word "poser" and stereotypes. The funny thing is, he didn't have anything. I would give a big schpeel about something and he would respond with a "fuck you". It was quite entertaining. After a few days of this madness i came to realize that I was fighting with a buffoon and on the Internet for that matter. I promptly ended it. He didn't like that i stated i8 would leave and i came back two times. Silly me. How embarrassing.
that's my story. maybe someone will debate with me intelligently.
just so you understand I will tell you my points about the Ryan battle.:
basically I said, about:
Anarchy:
1. that it will never work 2.that if he states he is trying for it, he couldn't have a tax paying job 3. that is the opposite of tranquility (which he thought it was)
punk fashion:
1.that it is just a fashion now 2.that no matter how much he thinks he is individual, he is trendy like the rest and that a Mohawk and torn jeans don't make you a punk (what ever that is)
the word "poser":
its stupid. that's all
Stereotypes:
this is the biggest one. I'm am accused over and over by Ryan of stereotyping him and putting him a category(while all the time he labels me hippie). But what i try to get across to him ( and his friends) is that by saying "punx unite" that they are labeling themselves. The fact that they follow the fashion and straight out say "i am a punk" kind of takes away their right to defend themselves against stereotypes. don't you think.
but that will be the end of that argument. I cant believe how long it want on for. and he kept saying" I don't care what you think" which if funny. but anyway....
WAR:
I might rant forever. Ill try to organize myself so i don't believe in peace. I hate war. I think Bush is a nimrod. I find it funny that Bush keeps saying this war is for "freedom". I don't see the connection. kill my family-free my family. it just doesn't equate.
another thing is all the propaganda and mystery behind this. I know all wars have this but it makes me confused. One day we are blaming Afghanistan for 9/11 and then all the sudden--Iraq has oil and "wow!" now Saddam is to blame. Its just sad and silly. If Bush could just make a speech that says "I am a greedy oil grubber and i can admit that" maybe it would be easier to take this news. Another thing is, America was with Saddam and Iraq in the 80s (Iraq .vs. Iran). The U.S supplied the chemical weapons to kill all the people of Iran. now how ironic is that? "Oh no everyone! Saddam has chemical weapons! kill kill kill!!"
i know that Iraq is keeping chemical weapons (or so they say. I don't know, but have they even found any hard evidence?). They say he is withholding them. this is no good. but isn't Korea doing the same? I’m not saying the should go after Korea or that i am siding with Saddam but I think this whole ordeal is just silly.
i think ill end the war talk there for now.
I was driving through the countryside last night and everything became so clear. It does. I realize what I am, maybe i should move out there. Its just, I realize what i want to fight and where my boundaries are. Its a good feeling. its like being whole. and it gives me confidence. I know that I'll fight for the environment and animal and human rights, but i can still feel spiritually free dig it? I know when to stop and breath and love. its good.
well, now i will break away from the sentimentality.
i have one more thing to rant about, and it kind of ties with my first argument. Stereotypes and images. I hate these things. Its all a big cycle. the cycle starts with media. We see on TV and in ads all the time the perfect stereotypes and on these we base ourselves. If we want to be a "perfect punk" we mimic the "punks we see on TV, dig? and i works for everything. This is where labels come from. and its hard not to use labels, the funniest thing is though, when people label themselves. WE DON'T WANT TO FALL INTO A CATEGORY! I can come up with many label right now, and I’m sure some of you can agree that you "are one of them" : skater, punk, emo kid, hippie, prep, jock. and the list goes on. Doesn't this suck. How come we let ourselves be categorized by the media? and you cant argue anything against this, because its true. where else would we get our "fashions". This may offend many, especially the ones who still think by being one of these categories they are "individuals"--how can you still think you are individual when you see people dressed just like you. On that not, I don't this individuality should be rated on how you are dressed. another place stereotypes come from. If we see someone who looks like a "punk" we assume that he is a bad person, which is not to say that he isn't. People are people are people..... . But the way someone dresses or wants look or the stereotype that they want to fit can reflect the way they act. an example: During my little escapade with "Ryan the punk" one comment he made to me is that he had killed a bird. he said it was amazing. now you see, he assumed that I was a "hippie" and thought that this would infuriate me (which on some level it did, the actual action and the fact that he took such a cheep shot). You see? his idea of a "punk" is "hardcore" and "hippies" and soft and compassionate, of course all his friends cheered that one.
We had a talk about clothing in my media class a little while back. Some said that "clothing said who you are" some agreed and some disagreed. I disagreed (of course). I think the way you dress tells HOW you are not WHO you are. because if it told who you are, everyone would be free to judge, and feel no remorse.
. I'm tired now.
new :
its been a long long time. but dont i say this every time. i started to read some of my rant. its funny how people grow. i see, i used to throw around opinions like a wildfire, not to say i dont still, just in moderation. i look back and think "gee, i sound dumb". its like i was less educated then than now. ive learned (to some extant) to think before i speak. im not sure what im saying. i still have my silly opinions, but they (some) are more researched. right now, im just growing,or trying to.that is all
you know, im starting to hate music. there are far to many genres. too many stereotypes. to much non sense.
you know. i dont fit
news:
you know, media is fucked up. when i was younger i thought the news was truthful, i thought “what would they want to hide from us?”. damn i was wrong. there is some much silly trickery going on. i hate it. that is why i cant watch T.V. i cant watch advertising and i dont want a box to tell me what to be. I know i couldnt let it, but many people can. you cant believe anything unless it is said to you first hand.
ive learned this. ive learned that anything that is said indirectly to you ar through a screen or a box or overheard are all lies. I can only believe what i see, and even that is shifty.
back to T.V. the thing is, is that money runs the t.v (that can sadly run our lives). it tells us what to look like, what to desire (in humans and in position), many people deny it. I dont like being tricked or outsmarted by something as simple as a television. dont get me wrong, there is some good, and i cant go around saying everything is bad, bad, bad when i know it isnt. just the most of it. so kids, avoid the news, dont spread it.
bye bye for now.
its fun to come here.to rant.to know that very few read this. i can offer any sort of opinion i want to,true or untrue.i can trick you,if i want to :).