Tequila, you can put a BAZOOKA to my head, but I'm still not taking my pants off. See what's shakin' in the world of HK Film. The site's most recent activities are on display. Tickets on sale now. What are those sly dogs cooking up at the BRT now? Curious as to just how much Witch from Nepal sucks? Check out the review, available here. You'll feel just like you know the people themselves! Okay, no you won't. But we DO have filmographies! Desktop looking drab? Tired of the same old boring 'you've got mail!' sound byte? We'll fix you up. Want to talk to other HK movie fans like yourself? Want to find a better Chow Yun-fat website? Need to buy Happy Ding Dong? Get it all here. All of The Bullet-Riddled Teahouse's dirty little secrets, aired out just for you.

Site Update - February 1st, 2007
The Chance Boudreaux figure from December 3rd's update is up on eBay!

Site Update - January 29th, 2007
A fella named Echsenschnitter has uploaded scenes from the unrated workprint of Hard Target to YouTube -- check 'em out! VIOLENT CONTENT, DUH.

He also uploaded the deleted love scene, which I'm sure you're clever enough to find for yourself. After all, you're clever enough to come here, am I right! Am I right! I'm right. Darn tootin'.

Site Update - January 27th, 2007
IGN has a new hands-on preview of Stranglehold. I don't know how I feel about all of the swinging from chandeliers and pterodactyls, but whatever!

Site Update - December 3rd, 2006
Holy geeze! This snuck up on me!

I'll be placing my order at Amazon.co.uk just in time to not get it for Christmas. (And does that cover fit right in around here or what?) If you pick it up, you might also want HKL's The Killer, Tiger on Beat, Full Contact, Bullet in the Head, or the OH CRAP THAT'S CHEAP collection that includes The Killer, Bullet in the Head, and Once a Thief in one tidy package! (Whether the DVDs in the package differ from the versions sold individually, I don't know, so buyer beware!)

Also be aware of two upcoming HKL releases:

I'll definitely be picking up Last Hurrah for Chivalry. It's a good'n. And Hand of Death, well, it has a guy named Zorro in it.

Also of interest -- a Chance Boudreaux action figure! (Registration required to view images.) Close your eyes, 'cause it's really gonna punch your snake:

Point at somebodee yore own size, peeg.

(By talented sculptor and all around nice fella Reggie.) I must say, I'm impressed. Why, I might even go so far as to say it make jackrabbit slap de bear.

And finally, new Curse of the Golden Flower trailer! I myself have not watched it because I do not need to be convinced that I want to see a Zhang Yimou movie that stars Chow Yun-freaking-fat. Pssssyched!!!

Site Update - July 20th, 2006
Just a quickie to let y'all know Deep Discount DVD's having a big sale, including Woo and CYF's Once a Thief, Ringo Lam's Maximum Risk, Jackie Chan's Snake in Eagle's Shadow and The Medallion, Jet Li's The One (Special Edition) and The Legend of Red Dragon, Takeshi Kaneshiro's The Returner, and other movies of interest, Once Upon a Time in Mexico and The Last Dragon. Phew! And yes indeed, lady and gentleman, I do this for no commission! It's an act of love.

Site Update - June 20th, 2006
The shirt mentioned back in December has apparently gone into production, and is up for sale on eBay. Take a gander at the final product:

Not cheap!

Also, while scouring my hard drive I discovered these things I'd made when Angelfire declared we could make our own 404 error pages to replace their painfully bad default ones. And then I discovered that's a Premium feature. Bastards. Anyway, I think the black one's pretty funny, even if it demonstrates that I'm still computer illiterate after all these years (did I make "LAN router" up?). In the first one I think Van Damme ended up looking like Jar Jar Binks, which is strangely appropriate. Enjoy.

Site Update - May 16th, 2006
Behold, the very first Hard Target wallpaper ever! Or so I would imagine.

R.I.P. Randal, Randal, Randal.

Check it out with all the others @ the wallpaper page.

Site Update - May 8th, 2006
Deep Discount DVD is having a buy 2 get 1 free $10 DVD sale, and among the eligible titles are Woo's Broken Arrow, CYF's Anna and the King, Li's Kiss of the Dragon (which is really underrated), and King's Love is a Many Splendored Thing. Ha ha, just kiddin'. Well no, I mean, it is eligible, but you don't want it, do ya? Noooo. Did you know that From Hell was apparently released in a two-disc special edition? And yet Harry and the Hendersons hasn't even gotten a barebones release. Tsk, tsk, tsk.

(There really are some other great titles there. Miller's Crossing, Raising Arizona, Barton Fink, The Day the Earth Stood Still, Alien & Aliens, Edward Scissorhands, Last of the Mohicans, and, uh, Solaris and Kung Pow: Enter the Fist. Well I like 'em.)

Site Update - May 2nd, 2006
New wallpaper! I bet you've been wondering when I'd get around to the rice, eh? Eh? Wondering? Often? Eh? Yeah. I thought so.

Check it out with all the others @ the wallpaper page. But you really should stop sitting around wondering about my wallpaper plans.

Site Update - March 2nd, 2006
IGN has video, screens and details on that John Woo/Chow Yun-fat videogame sequel to Hard-Boiled, Stranglehold. IGN also has news of online multiplayer features (vehicles!). The developer's previous project was Psi-Ops which, for anyone who didn't play it, was one of the better times I've had recently with a video game. I think we're in good hands (as long as they don't pull any of that Dead to Rights/True Crime/Path of Neo lock-on reticle crap).

Also of note is a new Chow Yun-fat action figure (okay, dolly) modeled loosely after his appearance in Hard-Boiled. That and a less-faithful, more SDU-ized version.

Site Update - December 13th, 2005
My Hotmail account lapsed long ago, so if anyone wants to contact me for whatever reason, pingpingpeowww@gmail.com is the place to do it. Pretty neat address, huh? It was either that or "mulletproofbonk." I think I made the right decision.

Check out this t-shirt design I found from GMTEE T-Shirts -

They changed the face to protect the innocent, but it's still pretty neato, and they've got lots of other cool Asian tees available. Check them out, but if you want that shirt, you're going to have to participate in the design contest and vote for it!

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