That look


You save yourself for someone
Who loves you for you
Loves me for me
Give it away to someone who will
Cherish your name
Cherish your name
— Sense Field

“Okay, okay. I’ll change, damnit. Just hold on a sec,” JC said with a breathy sigh as he threw up his hand in surrender and spun languidly in the hallway to head back to the bedroom.

“You’ll change *what*?” Justin called out after him, his whole face tightening into a confused squint.

In his head, he added to his question/plea. *Don’t change. Not a thing. I like it all. Just the way you are*

“This shirt. I’ll find another one. Give me a minute.” JC’s lilting voice came slightly muffled up the distance of the hallway from the other room.

“Why?”

“Because. You know why.”

Justin’s broad shoulders slumped, and he exhaled with a loud gush of air. “Why, Jace.”

“You gave me……….that look.”

“*What* look?”

“The ‘silent disapproval’ one. The look you give me when your eyes scream out, ‘Aww, crap, C. Those threads be whack. Didn’t ya even check the mirror, dog?”

Unable to stop himself, Justin let the warm, rolling giggle escape him. “C, my eyes get blamed for alotta shit. But they *never* been guilty of ghetto lines quite THAT bad, babe.”

JC’s muted chuckle preceded his airy words. “Hey, I wasn’t *that* horrible, man. Give me a break.”

“Okay. You were fine……….I mean you *are* fine. Very fine,” Justin said, unconsciously dropping the pitch of his voice to a huskier level.

He stood there in the living room and considered walking back to the bedroom in order to be closer to “very fine.” But, instead, he decided he’d prefer to wait, to allow the tiny suspense to mount, to be surprised by the magic of laying eyes on JC again. Even if it had been only minutes since he’d seen him last.

“Are you, um, flirting with me?” JC asked, quieter now because he had obviously stepped into the closet in his quest for a new shirt.

Justin snickered. “Yep.”

“Really?”

“Totally.”

“Ah, I’m flattered. And lucky.”

“What you are is sexy as hell. You hear me?”

“Stop, Ju. You’ll embarrass me.”

And Justin was sure he heard another stifled, satiny laugh from back there. “Hey, you seriously didn’t need to change shirts. I liked the gold and blue one……….It was good with your eyes.”

“You say that about all my shirts.”

Justin shrugged. “Well, it’s true. And I’m not just flirting.”

“Well, then, how’s this one? I forgot I had it.”

The soft-as-silk cadence of JC’s voice wafted around Justin’s head like mellow, sweet smoke and gently snapped his attention upward. And his pale blue eyes were riveted to the elegant sight of JC emerging from the doorway and strolling toward him through the shadows of the hallway with the slow sway and refined ease of a model on a runway. The dark brown sleeveless shirt he’d chosen clung to him beautifully, and its hem spilled down over his narrow waist.

Justin finally remembered to breathe as he stood there, mesmerized, when JC slowed up his unintentionally graceful saunter just a mere few inches in front of Justin’s chest. And then Justin smiled, angling up only one side of his mouth, into the silvery-blue eyes that glistened and played over his features like the fingertips of a well-trained masseuse.

“That one is……….” Justin glanced downward for a second to the taut material that resembled warm chocolate as it swelled and moved under JC’s writhing, heaving chest. “That one’s……….hot.”

Justin’s whispery pronunciation of the last word left the tip of his tongue near the roof of his mouth, but his lips remained parted. Seizing such an advantage point, JC brought his middle finger up to tenderly brush over the dewy, soft curve of the bottom cushion.

“Pretty……….Pretty mouth.”

Justin shuddered with the sensuous, light touch and the warm gust of breath from JC’s lungs. Then he edged his tongue out to dab at the fingertip caressing him.

“We could be late, ya know, getting to the party. Since you’re the guest of honor and all.”

He heard the excited airiness of his own tone, as well as the thumping heartbeat in his ears. JC, he understood well, was the *master* at standing there, so near, so innocently, and creating that thick physical energy between two bodies with the feather-lightness of his voice and the warm contact of his hands — an energy that would build and intensify the static humidity and spark the electricity in the close, close atmosphere and leave you both weakened and gasping for more. Please, more.

“We’re already late, my love.”

“We could be later.”

Unashamed, Justin wasn’t above begging. Without thinking twice about it, he could have easily grasped the slender hips and steered JC backward until they were snugly horizontal on the sofa, or the bed, or anywhere……….

“We’ll have afterwards, just you and me……….Post-party celebration,” JC promised quietly, trailing his fingertip over Justin’s top lip now.

“Jace,” Justin hissed, his left hand sliding down the smooth heat of JC’s vibrating chest and his right hand grazing over the bristly dark hairs of the sharp jaw line. “I want tonight to be special. For you. It’s *your* night.”

The break of the smile from JC was as slow as the hooding of his eyes. “It’ll be special as long as you’re there with me.”

“And afterwards.”

“Afterwards, of course. You and me.”

“C?”

“Yes, baby?”

“I love you. Happy birthday, sweetness.”

“Yes, I know. And I love you too.”

“You ready to head on over there then?”

“Sure. Let’s go. You said the limo’s waiting outside, right?”

“C?”

“Yes, baby.”

“It’s supposed to be a jacked-up surprise party. You’re not supposed to know. Don’t forget.”

“I won’t forget, my love. Trust me.” JC leaned closer for a small, heated press of his lips to Justin’s. “And you’re the best surprise I’ve ever had.”

* * * * * * * * * * * *

*Sweetness*

Justin always called him that because, hell, JC was *sweet*.

*Sweet* the way he coils and stretches like syrup beneath you, emitting tiny groans and whimpers of pleasure as you slide against him in the darkness and touch things inside him that he needed to have touched.

*Sweet* in how he shimmies down next to you on the couch while you’re engrossed in a Lakers game on the tube and curls around you like a warm, sleek jaguar, nuzzling your neck with his moist mouth and stroking the sensitive part of your abdomen just above the rim of your jeans, and then purring into your ear like plush velvet, “Sorry, baby. Don’t let me disturb you. I just love this competitive-edge macho scent of yours when you’re so into sports.” And you’re so distracted by him then that you can’t do anything but pull him down on you and get lost in the magic of how perfectly your two bodies just fit together.

*Sweet* when his eyes’ shadows shift and dance with the candlelight as he sits across the table from you in The Dining Room of the Ritz Carlton and hints a small smile while he watches your appreciative fascination with the sparkling crystal cruet set on the white linen — and then, at home later, produces it for your from his jacket and grins proudly as you gawk wide-eyed, and stutter, “Jace, babe, I never saw you lift ‘em. Wow. When? How?”

“You weren’t supposed to see, my love. All part of the game.”

“But why?”

“You wanted them. I wanted you to have them.”

“Klepto.”

“Punish me then.”

“We coulda bought these, C. We’ve got, like, money.”

“Could have. Won’t have to now. Don’t trip. Just having a little fun. We left a big enough tip.”

“You’re bad.”

“Still love me?”

“Absolutely. Can’t help that.”

“You won’t call five-zero on my ass?”

“Hahahahaha! Five-OH, Jace! Five-OH, not zero. Hahaha. You so crazy, sweetness, and got your own little brand of down-wid-da-brown slang. Haha.”

Yes, he was sweetness personified to Justin. And he was whole-heartedly smitten with Justin too. Something Justin constantly found hard to believe.

He didn’t want to even imagine the possibility of being without all this now — this interlocked emotion and synched-up cohesiveness. Close to perfect. This life.

*Sweet like candy to my soul
Sweet you rock, and sweet you roll
Lost for you, I’m so lost for you
When you come crash into me
And I come into you
— Dave Matthews Band*

* * * * * * * * * * * *

“So shouw we dance?” Justin slurred his words slightly and slung his arm around JC’s shoulders as they moved together away from the thinning crowd of the party and into the shadows by the back wall. Muted thumping music from the DJ’s setup vibrated throughout the huge mansion, and screeching laughter sounded from the balcony outside.

“Dance?” JC whispered and eased nearer to Justin’s warmth, as if instinctively. His heavy eyelids lowered and raised again with fluid slowness, and the dark, thick lashes swept over the sharp swell of his cheekbones.

“You and me? Together?”

“Duh, Jace. Who else, babe? Iss your birthday. I wanna dance withya.” Justin’s wet lips sloppily grazed over JC’s temple and down along the side of his face, over the silky hair of his newly-grown beard.

“Everyone will see, Ju. C’mon,” JC murmured, tilting his head into the contact with Justin’s mouth.

“Everyone here *knows* ‘bout us, sweetness. They don’t give a big ol’ rat’s ass even if we wanted to fuck on the dance floor. That was, like, the point of having a surprise blow-out for ya wid all our friends. So we could celebwate openly.”

“You’re getting kind of toasted. You might fall down.”

“Naw. I’ll lean on you. You’ll hold me up, C.”

“The reporters might still be here.”

Justin shifted his head long enough to gulp down a large swig from the plastic cup in his grip. Then he pressed into JC once more.

“Aww, man. I dunno how the press got in here. But they’re long-gone now. So’s ‘bout everybody else. We gave them reporters what they wanted anyway, didn’t we?” Justin giggled.

“Um, you gave them the PG-13 version, Ju. Skanky Candy the call girl plastic doll instead of Big Gay Rod the rodeo champion.”

Justin snickered. “Well, they both had two life-like orifices, didn’t they?”

“I’m not sure I wanna find out just HOW life-like. Especially from miss girlie. And ol’ Rod even came with his own strap-on attachments……….in case you wanna go for a *ride*. Haha.”

“No, C. In case YOU wanna go for a ride, man. He’s YOUR doll, babe. Only the best for you.” Justin’s moist mouth swept over JC’s earlobe.

“I already have the best.”

“Aww. You’re so sweet.”

“So we’ll let mister Rod hang out back there and guard the cake.”

“With his ropes and spurs? Man, that should be a pretty damn protected cake.”

JC laughed softly, shaking both their bodies at once. “Which you also BSed to the press about.”

“Hey! Didya want me to tell God and the world how you deep-throated that wicked-sexy extension the baker put on just for you and got yourself a gooey mouthful?”

Still giggling, JC felt his cheeks crimson at the memory of his own looming shock when they’d rolled the lit-up birthday cake into the closed-off dining room earlier in the evening and all the guests had sung “Happy Birthday to You” to him as he stared, amazed and huge-eyed.

The shape had clearly been a male torso from upper chest down to mid-thighs, complete with decorations of realistic-looking nipples, defined pec muscles, and even a thin dark trail that centered the abdomen and led to the main attraction — a long, tube-shaped section of cake that had been attached to protrude at an obvious jutting angle from the “crotch” and frosted in a more purplish-red color than the rest of the cake. The “head” of this pastry shaft had been rounded off and molded to almost-identically mirror a hardened penis, and a small dot of off-white marzipan sat on the tip.

“Go ahead, JC! Take a bite! Or at least a few licks! Don’t wanna waste that!”

“Yeah, he’s ready for you, man! He musta seen your sexy ass perform!”

“That boy’s about to pop, Chasez! Help him out! Probably won’t take more’n a few swipes of the ol’ tongue, man!”

They’d all yelled at him heartily and raised their drinks and laughed as JC had grinned and blushed and hesitated. He certainly hadn’t expected *this*.

“SOMETHING had to be a surprise tonight, babe,” Justin had sidled up to him in the merriment and whispered against the side of his head, so that only JC could hear. Then he’d reached down and squeezed JC’s ass. “Go on and give that dude some head with that awesome mouth of yours. I know for a fact it won’t take much.”

Pulling JC closer with a hand on his waist, Justin had planted a huge, steamed kiss on his neck and lapped at the warm flesh there. Gently, he’d shoved JC toward the cake as everyone else laughed and encouraged him playfully.

Shyly, JC had leaned in and slowly wrapped his lips around the end of the phallic extension (which was sized for precisely that), swirled his tongue out around the length just for show, and then easily sucked off and came away with the head as he stood up again. The whole room had cheered and clapped at the sight of his mouthful of the white cream that had been waiting for him inside the extra-large Twinkie. And, still overwhelmed and tickled, he’d tried to contain the sugary stickiness between his lips, his entire face giggling and reddening.

But Justin had flown to his rescue instantly, and, laughing with him, had licked the excess that had escaped the corners of JC’s mouth and then covered JC’s lips with his own affectionately. And warmly. And openly. Bringing more applause and whistles from their gathering of trusted friends.

“Happy B-day, sweetness,” Justin had murmured into his ocean-blue eyes, and then kissed him again with the soft, hot, dazzling intensity that had coursed through both of them.

The gusts of air from Justin’s pleased chuckle here in the quiet semi-darkness of the party now titillated JC’s neck. “You’re so cute when you get embarrassed. The way your eyes do that crinkle thing at the edges when you grin and look down. You know what I’m talking ‘bout.”

“Well, it was a tad bit baffling, I must say.”

JC snickered a little and twisted his hip into the heat of Justin’s hard abdomen. Then, as if struck suddenly and savagely by something ungodly sharp, JC flinched and fell against Justin’s supporting frame. His free hand grabbed viciously at his stomach.

“Shit!” The whispered hiss came out muffled into Justin’s collarbone.

“Whoa! You okay, babe? What is it?” Justin growled, alarmed. He tightened his embrace around JC’s shoulders

“Just a little cramp, I think. Yeah, I’m fine.” JC hoarse tone said otherwise.

“You sure? That didn’t sound so good.”

“It’s okay. Guess my gut’s a little jittery from all the hoopla. I’m good.”

“We can go, C, if you’re feeling crappy.”

“I feel okay now. It’s really nothing. Gone.”

“Okay. If you say so……….Hey, wha-does yer hat say? Something so dirty you hadda flip it around and hide it in the media photos?”

“Something non-printable in *that* magazine.”

“Lemme see, babe.”

JC bent his neck forward and turned his head to let Justin read the front of his baseball cap. His arm slid around Justin’s waist and hugged.

“The prostate is your friend.”

Justin belted out his enormous, ringing belly-laugh as JC raised up to look at him again. “That’s funny as fuck, Jace. Who gave you that?”

“Jenna. Is she cool or what?”

“Jenna’s ripped, man. Is she still here?”

“I think she left. She had a date.”

Justin leaned in closer, one side of his chest resting against one side of JC’s. Tight, pulsating flesh moving on each other. “She likes you, Jace.”

“I like her too. Really. It was awesome that she could make it tonight.”

“You mean that? It doesn’t bother ya when she’s around?” Justin brought his large hand up off JC’s shoulder to smooth the back of his fingers down JC’s unshaven jaw.

The blue in JC’s eyes darkened, as if accentuating the depth there. “You’re not screwing her, are you?”

“I’m only screwing one person. And you’re big-time familiar with him.”

JC shrugged gracefully and smiled. “Then I’m fine with Jenna. She’s a lovely decoy.”

“Cool. I had to make sure.”

“You’re such a good, considerate boyfriend.”

Justin smiled in return and let his eyes fall downward momentarily. He’d been used to compliments all his life. But from JC, they were different, more genuine, more significant. When he raised his head again, the smile became a grin and revealed a glimpse of the gleaming enamel of his perfect teeth.

“Thanks……….So shall we dance? You never answered me, Mr. I’m-Now-Past-The-Quarter-Century-Mark.”

“I knew you were going to ask me that again.”

“How?”

“You’ve got that look.”

Justin rolled his big blue eyes with rich, dramatic flourish. “Oh, Christ. Again with the look. C’mon, sweetness. The dance floor’s clearing out.”

*Dancin’ in the dark, middle of the night
Takin’ your heart and holdin’ it tight
Emotional touch, touchin’ my skin
And asking you to do what you’ve been doin’ all over again
Oh, its a beautiful thing, don’t think I can keep it all in
I just gotta let you know what it is that won’t let me go

It’s your love…….it just does something to me
It sends a shock right through me, I can’t get enough
And if you wonder about the spell I’m under,
Oh, it’s your love
—Tim McGraw*

* * * * * * * * * * * *

“Okay now……….What no-good stuff are you up to over there, baby?”

Justin glanced around over his shoulder quickly and couldn’t keep a slow grin from breaking across his face. The vision of JC slinking toward him on hands and knees across the expanse of the bed, wearing only his boxers, was still so breath-stealing no matter how many times Justin had seen it. A large, agile feline that could personify both predator and prey.

“Nothing.” Justin squirmed in his cross-legged seated position and hid in his lap the object he’d been toying with.

“Ah, don’t lie to me, Timberlake. I can read you like a comic book.” JC’s cottony voice felt hot and moist on Justin’s shoulder and neck as JC stealthily overtook him on all-fours and the seductive smile came around from Justin’s side and faced him.

“You saying I’m cheap?” Justin asked, his eyes laughing.

“No, not cheap. Just colorful and easy.”

Justin winced a little at the scent and warmth all around him. His head felt fuzzy from big doses of booze he’d downed at the party, but this — JC’s alluring close presence — was the ultimate, the insurmountable intoxication. Ah, yes. Hit me up again with some of that……….

“Easy only for *you*,” he whispered, entranced by the rich combination of it all. Sight, smell, sound, touch……….

“I know, love. I know.” JC narrowed his eyes and eased in closer to lightly suction Justin’s bottom lip.

*Taste*

Then he collapsed tiredly and stretched out backwards on the bed next to Justin, his honey-streaked ebony hair spilling over the pillow and his fingertips kneading into Justin’s muscled thigh. “My own little frat boy. Never thought I’d get me one of those.”

“That’s not funny,” Justin said, watching JC still as his slender body curled around Justin’s squat form.

JC snickered. “What’s that you’re trying to hid there?” His eyes, tinged slightly with a scarlet hue from the alcohol he too had consumed, dropped to Justin’s lap.

Justin smiled mischievously again and raised his left eyebrow. “A gift. For the birthday boy.”

“But you gave me a gift already, baby. That new woofer sound system is making me and my Lexus very happy……….and making me go deaf.”

“Naw. That wasn’t, like, personal.”

“Justin, you gave me the kick-ass party too. Now stop. Enough is enough.”

“All I did for the party was ask Eric and Neil if they’d host it. ‘Cause they’ve got the biggest pad and all since mine’s not ready yet.”

“You fronted all the cash for it too. Don’t be modest. It doesn’t become you.”

“So? It’s my cash. Why can’t I spend it on you?” Justin whined.

“You’ve done enough, Ju. Seriously. No more presents.” JC slid his warm palm up Justin’s dense thigh until he reached the hem of the shorts and then slipped his fingers up under the black silk.

“One more, sexy,” Justin whispered as he lifted his hand and held up for display in the air between them a long, delicate silvery chain on which hung a small oval stone encased in a thin band of platinum.

JC swallowed and stared at it from the pillow as if its swinging motion had hypnotic powers. Gingerly, he reached up to touch it, turning with his fingertips the opaque deep-rose gem streaked with wispy black trails.

“It’s beautiful, Ju.”

Satisfied, Justin grinned and let the chain fall to entwine around JC’s long fingers. “You like?”

“Yes. I do. A lot. What is it?”

“Rhodonite. The ‘stone of love’……….Supposed to activate the heart energy and help the wearer achieve their greatest potential……….Comes in shades from salmon to lavender, but this dark pink one reminded me of you.”

Still studying his gift, JC sighed. “Gorgeous.”

“Just like you, C. And it’s called the ‘singer’s stone’ too. Enhances sound sensitivity or something like that. Good for your throat.”

“Really?”

“Yep. But if you’re not into it, I can take it back.”

Slivers of blue light from JC’s eyes splashed over Justin’s face like an achingly-slow sunrise. “I love it.” And his smile was one that sucked you in, pulled you forward.

*First you take my eyes, and then you draw in all the rest of me*

“And if it means all that stuff you mentioned, then you should have one as well.”

“A matching one?” Justin asked softly, warmed by the heat from the gaze.

“Yes. Absolutely. Now here. Help me get this one on.” JC groaned, sitting up in the bed. “So that I can properly thank you for it.”

“No thanking me, sweetness. You’re the top dawg today. Tonight. You get to lay back and let me take care of you.” Justin had scooted around behind his boyfriend to clasp the necklace closed and lifted the dark messy waves of his hair so that he could brush the soft flesh there with his lips before laying the cool platinum links down on it.

JC smiled and shivered and leaned backward into the upper-body hug Justin had wrapped around him now. The sensation of the flat planes of Justin’s chest and stomach pressing against the warm tightness of his back combined with Justin’s strong arms and legs surrounding him and vibrating him snugly sent delicious flutters of pleasure through JC’s blood and over his skin.

This was the only way to turn a year older. Enfolded in comfortable, exhilarating love.

*I’ll take your invitation
You take all of me
Now I’m falling even more in love with you
Letting go of all I’ve held on to
I’m standing here until you make me move
I’m hanging by a moment here with you
I’m living for the only thing I know
I’m running, and I’m not quite sure where to go
And I don’t know what I’m diving into
Just hanging by a moment here with you
There is nothing else to lose
There is nothing else to find
There is nothing in the world
That could change my mind
There is nothing else...
—Lifehouse*

* * * * * * * * * * * *

Justin wasn’t sure if his eyes were open or not because all he could see was pitch-blackness. But he knew for a fact that he was definitely awake because his shoulder stung still from the sharp jab — no, series of jabs — JC had just given him. And because the desperately-moaned hiss from JC’s side of the bed still rang in his ears and curdled his insides.

“Jussssstin……….It hurts like a motherfucker……….Do something……….Hurry.”

He sat up hurriedly and scrambled for the lamp and then felt his own heart thud to his gut when he turned back to JC, who lay there crumpled on his side shuddering and holding his abdomen tightly with both arms. His face glistened with fevered sweat, and the soaked matted strands of hair sat plastered on his forehead.

“Baby, what’s the matter! Jesus Christ, Jace! What is it?” Protectively and without thinking, Justin bent over and swooped the way-too-hot body up in his arms and held him.

“FUCK! Are you trying to fucking KILL me here? I’m already damn dying! Isn’t that good enough? Shit!” JC growled from low places in his throat and clutched harder at where the pain was obviously originating.

“I’m sorry, C. I didn’t mean to hurt you more. I’m sorry. Hell, you’re burning up. What in God’s name is wrong? Talk to me, baby.”

Justin had laid him back down gently and swiped the damp kinked curls off his face. Panic churned and pounded in his chest. This wasn’t good, his mind screamed at him. JC never cursed like that unless something was seriously bothering him. He needed help. Badly. And the fear of inadequacy and helplessness soared through Justin and threatened to well up in his throat and choke him.

“Don’t……….know……….It woke me up……….Getting worse.”

“Be right back, Jace.”

Justin eased off the bed and hauled-ass to the bathroom and then rushed back frantically with a cold, wet washcloth. Carefully, he sat down on the mattress again and swabbed over JC’s damp face. His anxiety singed up the middle of his chest.

“Is it that same pain you had earlier? That jittery thing in your stomach at the party?”

“Yessss,” JC answered with a rasp through clenched teeth, his eyes squeezed shut. “Only six hundred fucking times more intenssssssse.”

“I dunno what to do, sweetness. I’m scared.”

Exactly when Justin was positive his heart couldn’t beat any faster, another brutal bolt tore through JC, and he groaned forcefully as he curled in on himself further. Tears blistered Justin’s retinas, and he gulped down a large clump of bile in his throat.

“I’m calling for a damn ambulance, baby. And then I’m getting your pj bottoms back on you. This shit is fucked up.”

* * * * * * * * * * * *

Funny how really noisy a damn hospital is, Justin mused as he sat in the private room’s lone chair and listened to all the clamoring and talking and bustling out in the hallway. Maybe, he figured, he was simply overly-sensitive to all of it right now — nerve synapses all fried and jammed up and mangled after the past few frenzied hours he’d just lived through.

He sighed, shifted his feet restlessly, and glanced down at the watch he’d somehow remembered to sling on before they’d left the house in the ambulance. He’d all but given up on the damn thing even showing up, and he’d decided to carry JC down to the car and get him to the emergency room himself, no matter how much JC writhed in protest and screamed at him with that miserable pain. He’d been desperate, and he’d known some desperate measures needed to be taken. But the ambulance had finally arrived and sirened them speedily through the early morning streets of LA.

The watch glared back at him. 10:30 a.m. Sunshine washed over the city outside the window to his right. He wasn’t sure who he should call. Joey was in New York City. Lance was in Pop Star City.

And Chris. Who the hell knew where Chris was? Since the “Celebrity” Tour had ended, he’d become fond of hiding out — away from the spotlight as well as away from everyone else too. Justin hadn’t even talked to him since the taping of the Teen Choice Awards a week before. He’d sent JC a very expensive piece of framed art for his birthday. But he hadn’t phoned.

And Justin didn’t really want to ring up Karen and Roy with this news. No, not yet. Not until he was sure that JC —

“So did I die and you’re my own personal transport-to-Heaven angel?”

The feather-like voice cascaded over Justin like a silken sheet and riveted his eyes back to the bed for the millionth time that morning. This time, however, his anxious stare was met by weak but warm shimmering-blue orbs and a faint smile.

Justin bounded from his chair and fought back the urge to actually climb into the hospital bed with the still form. He remembered how his aggressive TLC had been damaging earlier. Instead, he gasped with relief and stood there by the side, smiling. Itching to embrace.

“You’re awake. Finally. Thank God.” Then he couldn’t help himself. He leaned in to kiss the pale cheek. “Thank God,” he whispered again.

“What happened to me, Ju? Bad caviar at the shindig? Man, I thought I was about to check outta here. I’m serious.”

“No, baby. Your appendix was, like, *this* close to rupturing. They got it just in time. You’re gonna to be okay.”

JC pretended to frown. “They cut me?”

“They had to, Jace. Just a little. You’ll be sore for a while, but then you’ll be good as new……….You worried ‘bout a scar?”

Attempting to broaden his smile, JC said, “My vanity’s so transparent, eh?”

Justin picked up the hand that lay there so lifelessly on the sheet and held it in the heat of both of his. “Stop that. Relax. As long as you’re fine, everything else will be too.”

“Thanks for getting me here, love. And I’m sorry I was such a bitch to you.”

Justin squeezed the flesh he adored. “Hey. You were broke. I hadda fix you.”

“And you did a good job……….You okay?”

“I’m good. Now that *you* are. And when they say you can leave, I’ll take you home and get you back up to speed, sweetness.”

“Justin?”

“What?”

“Thank you. I love you.” Slowly, JC raised Justin’s double-fisted grip of his hand to his mouth and kissed it three times, holding the watery-blue of Justin’s eyes.

“Don’t thank me, babe. You know I got your back. I’m here for you. Always.”

“You always have been.”

“Yep. And I ain’t going anywhere. Not without you.”

“When can I leave?”

“Haha! I knew you’d say that.” And Justin grinned.

“Yeah?”

“Yeah. ‘Cause you just got that look……….the one I can’t live without.”



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