Forever


Another boring meeting with Jive.

Justin had lost count of the number of meetings the group had attended since they signed with the label. Jive was meeting happy. And if it weren’t for the pledge the group had made when they jumped labels—that each of them would attend every meeting so they’d never be screwed again—he and JC wouldn’t have to be here.

He looked at the others in the group. Joey had fallen asleep with his eyes open, a trick the others envied. Chris was flirting with Clive’s assistant, Alicia, and seemed to be making progress with the pretty redhead. Lance, bless him, was actually interested in the meeting, and would undoubtedly tell the rest of them what went on. As for JC…he was buried in his notebook, writing furiously, every once in a while dropping his pen to play an imaginary keyboard on the table. Watching JC write music was fascinating to Justin. Hell, anything JC did was fascinating to Justin.

They’d been a “couple” for over five years now, the last two as lovers, and Justin loved him now more than ever. He knew JC felt the same way. But they actually went back farther than that…more like seven—or was it eight? —years. Justin watched as JC paused in his writing, looking up from his notebook and locking eyes with Justin. He smiled, a soft, sweet smile that tugged at Justin’s heart. It was the same smile he’d given him all those years ago, when he turned up at Justin’s house in Tennessee…


Justin kicked a rock, shoving his hands in his pockets. He hated it here. Well, not really hated it, but he hated school. He loved his family, but missed being in Orlando. He missed being on the Mouse Club, he missed his friends, he missed performing.

His mom said it was probably for the best, that he’d had his taste of the limelight, and now could concentrate on what really mattered, being a kid and going to school. But Justin wondered why he couldn’t be a kid and still perform. It was all he ever wanted to do…the thing he did best in the world.

Again he thought of the Mouse club. It had been so much fun. Performing and singing and dancing and laughing. And all his friends. He missed them so much! Ryan and Britney and Dale and Tony and JC. Justin sat on the grass. He missed JC the most. JC had been the big brother he’d never had. During his time on show, Justin had worshiped JC, and even though it was obvious and probably annoying to him, JC had never made fun of Justin but had always treated him with affection and love.

Justin pulled up clumps of grass, throwing the green blades up in the air and watching them fall back to earth. Justin was fifteen now, and he knew now what his feelings for JC meant, and knew it was more than brotherly affection. He was in love with him. And he thought JC might have feel the same way about him. The last days of the Mouse Club had been filled with emotion, and once, JC had kissed him. Not long, and not really romantically, but it had been a kiss. On the lips. They’d both blushed and stammered and given man-hugs after that, but it was there, between them. And JC wrote to him after they’d parted, even after he went to California. He’d gotten one from him only last week, even. One that said he’d see Justin soon, whatever that meant. So now Justin was stuck in Tennessee, bored out of his mind, and loving someone who was thousands of miles away.

School was no challenge, he got A’s without even trying. The music program sucked…one choir, no band, no orchestra. School’s only saving grace was his placement on the basketball team, though that was now in jeopardy. Justin had just been suspended from school for mailbox bashing, and the coach and his mom were discussing what to do about him. It wasn’t his fault there wasn’t anything else to do in this town, Justin thought. And why the school was involved he didn’t know, except that he’d bashed the principles mailbox. And the vice principle’s. And all his teachers. Justin sighed, then laid down on the grass, throwing an arm over his head.

He heard the crunch of tires on the gravel driveway, and propped himself up, wonder who was coming to their house. His mom and Paul weren’t due home until later. He squinted as the sun shone off the car’s window. Justin saw a maroon mini-van pull up and stop. It was covered in dust. It had Maryland plates. Justin swallowed hard as the driver’s side door opened.

Justin watched as JC came around the front of the van and stood off to the side, not walking on the grass. He took off his sunglasses and locked gazes with Justin. He looked tired and thin. But suddenly, his face broke out into a soft, sweet smile when he and started walking towards him.


The sound of a phone ringing brought Justin back to the present. He looked around as everyone checked their phones, then watched as it turned out to be Johnny’s. The manager excused himself from the table, giving the rest of the participants a chance to stretch. Justin watched as JC stood up, link his hands together, pulled them over his head, then bent to the left, then the right, his shirt riding up with each movement. His hand itched to touch the exposed skin. JC caught his eyes and winked at him, jerking his head in the direction of the door. Justin nodded quickly, and the two men had almost made their escape when Johnny returned. With a sigh, the lovers resumed their places at the table and the meeting continued. Justin’s mind wandered to the past again…


“No.”

“But JC…” Justin pouted, trying anything to get the other man to relent.

“I said no, Justin. Please accept that.”

JC and Justin had been having this argument for almost three years. Justin was ready to take their relationship to the next level—and by next level Justin meant have sex--but JC stubbornly refused to cooperate. JC has some weird idea that they needed to wait until Justin was eighteen and legal. But his 18th birthday was six months away, and he’d already suffered thru three years of make out sessions and quicky self-given hand jobs. He wanted JC. And he wanted him NOW.

“Just, it’s important that we wait until you’re legal. Then you can make the decision yourself.” JC had said this before, but he’d never quite understood it.

“I know what I want, Josh,” Justin said. “What I want is you. All I’ve ever wanted is you.”

“You say that now, but you might change your mind.” JC said, moving away from Justin on the couch.

That was new. Where had this come from? “Jesus, Josh. Why would I change my mind? I’ve been in love with you my whole life! Why would that change in the next six months?”

“That’s exactly why, Justin.” JC looked out the window as the miles rolled by. “You’ve never known anything else except me.”

“I don’t WANT to know anything else.”

“So then we can wait.” JC proclaimed. “If you’re that sure, you’ll still be sure in six months.”

Justin watched as Lance came back into the lounge area and flopped down on the couch, lap top opening. JC excused himself to go take a nap. Justin continued to pout.

“He’s scared, Just.” Lance was typing on his laptop, but spoke to his friend.

Justin blinked owlishly. JC? Scared? “Of what?”

“Of losing you.” Lance turned to Justin. “He’s scared because you’re so young. He’s scared because he’s all you’ve ever known and you may find someone else down the road and leave him.” Justin started to protest but Lance held a hand up to stop him. “And he’s scared because if you ever did find someone else, it would kill him.”

Find someone else? Someone other than JC? The idea seemed incredible and even distasteful to Justin. He could never, ever love someone other than JC. Justin belonged to him, had since the first day of the Mouse Club.

“Think about it, Justin,” Lance continued. “Then give him a break, okay?”

Justin sat in the lounge for hours, watching the scenery pass, thinking about JC and their relationship. Since the day he’d driven up to his house in Tennessee, JC and Justin had been inseparable. Justin’s mother knew it they minute she saw them that night, perhaps had always known it. Then the next week Chris had called, they’d gone to Orlando, and this merry-go-round called *Nsync had begun. But thru it all, JC and Justin had been together.

Now JC was scared Justin would change his mind? Justin had to find a way to show JC that he wouldn’t ever change his feelings and the only way he could think of doing that was by doing what JC wanted. He left the lounge and went to the bunk area of the bus. He pulled apart the curtains of JC’s bunk and slowly slipped inside, squirming until JC moved around enough for Justin to plaster himself against him. Finally, JC woke up and groggily looked down at Justin at his side.

“Just? What’s up?” JC whispered. “Why are you in my bunk?” Out of deference to the other guys, they never did this on bus trips, so Justin in his bunk was truly an odd occurrence.

Justin lifted his head. “I understand, Josh.” He lowered his head again, holding JC’s thin frame to him. “And I’ll wait until you’re sure of me.”

JC stiffened, then forced Justin to look at him again. “Justin, it’s not that I’m unsure of you…” His voice trailed off, because that’s exactly what he was. Unsure of Justin and their relationship.

“I love you, Josh.” Justin again put his head on JC’s chest. “And you’re never, ever going to get rid of me. I just have to be patient until you realize that.” His blue eyes shining with unshed tears eyes. “Even if we can’t have tonight, I do know we have forever.”


“Okay…ten minute break, then we can finish up and be out of here.”

Everyone blinked as Clive scraped his chair back and left the table. JC and Justin both watched as the Jive label men and their assistant left the room, Chris still trailing behind the pretty redhead. Johnny was the next to leave, giving a stern glance at his talent and a warning that they’d better not leave, or he’d have Wade work them extra hard next week. The door shut behind him, the sound rousing Joey. He stretched, scratched, then left the room also. Which left only Lance. The blonde singer looked at the two lovers, ruefully shook his head, then walked to the door.

“I’ll stand guard,” he proclaimed. “But nothing that requires undressing, okay?”

JC and Justin were already reaching for each other, mouths melting, tongues dancing, hands roaming.

“God almighty, I thought they’d never give us a break,” JC exclaimed, nibbling on Justin’s ear, making the younger man moan.

“Why did we make that stupid meeting pact, anyway?” Justin complained, pulling JC closer for another wet, hot kiss. Justin was dying, he was convinced. He was so hard and wanted JC so bad…and now they still couldn’t leave…but his hand was pushing between them…a bit more… there…he pressed his hand over JC’s groin, getting a moan from the older man. Justin started to unzip JC when his hand was stopped.

“Just…we can’t…they’re right outside the door…”

“Fuck ‘em,” Justin replied. “I want you now…”

“Well, you can’t have me,” JC reluctantly pulled away, putting some space between them. “At least not here, not yet.” JC went back to his seat at the table, sitting down before the others entered the room. Justin followed his lover and looked over his shoulder at his journal.

“What’cha writing?” he asked, trying to pull the book away from JC, but the older man clasped it close to him.

“A song.” Justin raised a brow. “A song for you.”

Justin held his breath. JC never wrote songs for people. He said he was just inspired by life, not by anyone in particular. That had never offended Justin; it was just the way JC was. But to actually have him write a song for Justin…

“Why?” Justin asked softly.

“For your birthday.”

Justin was prevented from responding by the door opening and the others reentering the room. He kept his eyes on JC as the other man resumed his writing. Justin tuned out Clive’s voice as he remembered a different birthday…


“…Happy birthday, to you!” Justin smiled as he blew out the candles on his cake, then slapped Chris’ hand as he reached in to grab one. He moved out of the way so Lynn could cut the cake and pass it around.

It was Justin’s 18th birthday. Finally. He could now sign his own contracts, buy his own house, even vote. He searched the kitchen for that one special pair of eyes and shivered slightly as he locked on those brilliant blue orbs. And finally, he would be with the man he loved. He knew what JC was thinking as they held gazes. They would become lovers tonight, after years of waiting and watching and wanting. Justin watched as JC’s eyes narrowed and skimmed over Justin’s body. He watched as JC brought a finger up to his mouth and his tongue peeked out between his lips to lightly lick the icing off, and Justin barely contained a groan. Fucking tease, Justin thought. You know what you’re doing to me, and you’ll pay for it later. JC raised a brow as if he could read Justin’s mind. Justin nodded. JC smiled. This party couldn't end soon enough

“Mom, we’re leaving now,” Justin called.

Lynn came to the door to see the band mates off. “Be careful. Who’s designated driver?” Joey raised a hand. “Good.” She kissed each one of her boys, then hugged Justin close. “Have a good time, sweetheart,” she said, pushing them all out side.

The group walked to the two cars parked in the street. No one said a word as Joey, Chris and Lance got in one vehicle, and Justin and JC the other. JC was silent during the drive, and Justin also found himself with nothing to say, but sneaked looks over to JC as he drove. The lights from the on-coming cars made strange shadows on his face, making the sharp angles even sharper. Justin saw JC’s breathing was fast and shallow, and his hands were gripping the steering wheel tightly. Soon they pulled into the driveway at the house JC shared with Joey, and the two men walked into the front door.

Justin would have screamed in surprise when JC slammed him against the door but for the fact his mouth was covered by JC’s, devouring Justin’s with a hunger that knew no bounds. Justin couldn’t touch JC enough. Hair, face, chest, back…pulling him closer and grinding his hips against JC’s, reveling in the feel of his engorged cock. Justin sucked in a breath as JC’s mouth left his and traveled down his throat, licking and biting the exposed skin before once more clamping down on Justin’s mouth, sucking his tongue into his own, eating Justin’s mouth as a starved man would food.

Justin felt JC’s hand on Justin’s groin and groaned at the touch. “Oh, god,” he breathed, pulling his mouth away. “Oh god, Josh, I love you so much…oh god…” Justin felt cool air on his cock as JC pulled his pants apart and down his hips. JC grasped Justin’s cock and Justin knew he was close, so close. He tried to stop it, but after three years of waiting couldn’t wait any longer and came in JC’s hand.

His eyes got big as his climax poured from him. “Oh, Josh…I’m so sorry!” Justin buried his head in shame against JC’s shoulder. Oh god…how could he do that?

JC just smiled. “Shh, baby…it’s okay.” He lifted Justin’s’ face up to his, wiping the tears that had formed away with his thumb. JC placed soft, butterfly kisses on Justin’s mouth. “We have all night, my love…we have forever…”


“Thank god that’s over with!” Chris exclaimed as Clive and the other’s left the room.

“What’s the matter,” Lance chided him.
“You strike out?”

Chris snorted. “I’d like to see you do any better!”

“With one hand tied, Shorty!”

“Uh, guys?” Justin interrupted. “Looks like you both lose.” Justin waved a hand at the door as Alicia, the pretty redheaded assistant, walked out arm and arm with Joey.

“Fucking hell!” Chris exclaimed. “How the hell can you compete with a guy who gets girls even when he’s asleep?”

Lance shook his head. “He’s the king, Chris.” Lance waved to JC and Justin. “We’ll meet later and I’ll tell you what this was all about, okay?” He gathered his laptop and papers, then yelped when Chris jumped on his back.

“Take me to dinner, Lancey!”

“So, what do you want for dinner?” JC asked, then smiled as Justin leered at him. “I mean food wise, you idiot.”

“Hmm, food wise,” Justin said, walking over and falling into JC’ opened arms. “Maybe pizza?”

“Okay,” JC agreed.

“And beer, too.”

“All right.”

“Brownies for desert.”

“Sounds good.”

“And then you can sing me my song.”

“No.”

“But JC!”

JC shook his head, moving Justin out of his arms and gathering his notebook. “No. It’s for your birthday, and you’re not getting it before then.”

“But that’s six weeks away!” Justin protested, pouting.

“Too bad.” JC leaned over and kissed his nose. “You can wait, you’ve done it before.”

“But if you know I can wait, why can’t I just have it now?” Justin argued.

“Justin.” JC’s voice made Justin pause. “Remember what we always say…”

“Today doesn’t matter…we have forever,” Justin recited.

“Remember that, my love.”

Justin looked at the man he loved more than anything else. It was true, he thought.

We have forever.



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