Justin was sitting alone in
the booth on the quiet bus waiting for the others to arrive. Johnny decided the
group should travel on one bus together since their next stop was only two hours
away from their last. Their concert was scheduled for Thursday, which gave the
five men a well-deserved day off in between. Justin was glad for the break no
matter how short it was. It would give him some alone time with JC and they
could finally work out their issues. Well, at least Justin would be able to
address his problem; he wasn’t even sure JC knew there was a one. The main
issue Justin had was JC running around with Tony and he was sick of it. Just
thinking about them together made his heart race and his blood boil. He was
fuming about it; he has been for a couple days now, and he couldn’t understand
how his boyfriend was so oblivious to it. Justin heard the door open and looked
over determining who entered. It was JC. However, JC was not unaccompanied. The
other members of the group also entered and as quickly as they appeared they
disappeared into the sleeping area leaving JC and Justin alone together.
“Hey, sugar.” JC walked
in Justin’s direction stopping in front of him, placed his hands on either
side of his face and leaned down for a kiss. Justin pulled away. The brunette
moved away from Justin and was taken aback by his boyfriend’s actions.
“What’s up? Why are you giving me the cold shoulder?” JC stared at Justin.
When Justin did not respond JC asked, “What did I do wrong now?”
Justin scowled up at JC,
azure eyes meeting steel. “How could you?”
“What are you talking about?
How could I, what?”
“Don’t play stupid with
me, JC. It isn’t gonna work this time.” Justin turned his gaze away from the
brunette and sighed. “God you can be so oblivious, can’t you?”
JC stepped closer toward
Justin rubbing his knee against Justin’s. “Justin. I honestly don’t know
what you’re talking about. But it must be something extremely important for
you to act like this.”
Justin stood up, sending JC
back a couple of steps and snapped, “Acting like what. How exactly am I acting?”
“Like an asshole, you never
act like this. You never sit and sulk without telling me what’s going on. You
definitely never treat me this way. I need to know what I did wrong in order to
fix it. Otherwise, I’m clueless.”
“Like that’s something
new for you, JC. And if you can’t figure it out then maybe were better off not
together.”
“What?” JC answered in a
hurt laden voice. “How could you say that? I didn’t do anything wrong. I
didn’t deserve that.”
Justin crept closer toward
JC. “The hell you didn’t,” the blond went silent for a moment. Then
without warning shouted. “Oh, that’s right. I fucking nearly forgot. You do
everything right don’t you. I’m the perpetual fuck up. I do everything wrong
and I’m the one who is always at fault. Aren’t I?” Justin pointed a finger
into JC’s sadden face. “Not this time, asshole. You’re the one who’s at
fault.”
JC’s vision was become
blurry, but he did not want his tears falling in front of Justin. The brunette
did not understand why Justin was treating him this way. He could not handle it
anymore so he turned; intending on leaving the living area and heading back
toward his bunk but Justin snatched his arm. “No, you don’t. I’m not gonna
let you go running off somewhere. You always run away when there’s
confrontation. Not this time,” he pulled JC into him, “not this time.”
JC’s tears began cascading
down his face, “You’re hurting me.” He tried pulling his arm out of
Justin’s grasp, but the younger man just tightened it. “Please, let go.”
Justin laughed, “Yep, right
on cue, here they come…the tears. That’s so like you JC. Always the victim.”
He shoved the brunette toward the door leading into the sleeping area. JC
stumbled and would have fallen had he not reached out for the door jam. The
brunette straightened his body and pulled his shirt down. He snuffed the tears
back before he spoke. “What did I do, Justin?”
Justin face was red with
anger. He took a menacing step again toward JC and the brunette involuntarily
stepped back. “Hmmm…let’s see. Okay, C. Think back about two days ago
while we were in Detroit.” JC nodded his head. “Is your little mind there
yet?” The brunette shyly looked at the floor of the bus another tear making
its escape from the cloudy blue eyes and again nodded his head. “Remember
where we went after the concert, JC? Do you?”
“Yes,” JC’s voice
trembled afraid to look up.
“Who went with us?”
Justin screamed.
JC’s mind was racing
desperately thinking back to that night. The brunette pictured Lance, Chris, the
bodyguards, Justin and… and… “T… Tony,” JC whispered. Once the name
was out of JC’s mouth he knew where the argument was leading. However, before
he could speak Justin’s voice boomed through the bus.
“That’s fucking right,
JC. Your fucking ex-boyfriend went with us. Why? Can you tell me that? Why did
Tony go with us? Who invited him?” Justin waved his hands above his head and
then folded them acrossed his chest. “Let’s ponder that for a second, shall
we?”
“Umm… I can…I can
explain.” JC’s body was quivering. He knew what Justin was getting at but he
was wrong. Tony only went for publicity purposes; he was not the one who invited
him.
“Yes, please do.”
The tears in JC’s eyes were
becoming bothersome and his nose was running. He needed to compose himself
before he could continue the argument. JC started walking toward the bathroom
with the idea of getting Kleenex when again Justin grabbed his arm.
“Are you gonna answer my
questions?” he sneered.
The brunette’s eyes filled
with fear when he looked into Justin’s storming blue ones. He was in trouble,
but if he could explain everything, Justin would be fine with it and they would
continue their perfect life. “I…I …just… Kleenex.”
“No.” Justin yelled, “I
want my answers.” His grip intensified squeezing JC’s flesh relentlessly.
“Tell me why he was there. I want to know why my boyfriend spent more time
with Tony then he did with me. I want answers, JC.” Justin’s grip became
tighter and tighter leaving small bruises on the slender man’s arm. The blond
singer shook the older man and screamed at the top of his lungs. “Tell me now
you fucking slut.”
Without thinking JC’s free
hand stuck Justin across the face leaving a faint handprint across the smooth
skin. He felt the blonde’s hand release his arm as Justin covered his face.
Justin was shocked but his hesitation only lasted a second. He has never been
struck before; instinctively he responded and Justin did the one thing that came
naturally, the blond struck back.
“How fucking dare you…”
JC’s head snapped to the left as Justin’s clenched fist connected with the
right side of his face. The force of the blow knocked JC’s smaller body into
the doorframe; smashing his forehead into it. The brunette could feel the liquid
flowing freely from his nose and down into his opened mouth. He slowly slid down
the frame, rested on his knees and tried holding back his tears. JC ran his
tongue out interrupting the trail of blood as it cascaded down his face and
swallowed the coppery tasting substance. The brunette never thought he would
taste his own blood again, he was promised he never would. That promise was
broken just as his heart was. He brought his hand up and rubbed it across his
face smearing his life’s essence onto the back of his hand and over his face.
JC placed his hand back onto the frame hanging on with a tortured grip. The
brunette’s head was spinning; body shaking and he wavered in and out of
consciousness. He could vaguely hear his boyfriend speaking.
“Oh my God, JC, baby. I’m
so so sorry. Oh God, oh God.” He ran over toward JC, knelt down and reached
out for him but was stopped by a single hand in protest. “JC?”
“Don’t,” the brunette
whimpered. “Don’t come…come near me. You…you prom…promised.”
“JC. I know. I’m sorry.
Please, please you gotta forgive me. I didn’t mean it.” Justin again reached
for JC, but halted his efforts when he noticed his boyfriend flinch away from
him. “No, baby. I won’t hurt you anymore. I didn’t mean it,” Justin’s
voice broke down as tears flowed from his eyes. “JC?”
“Justin, just…get away
from me.” The older man stayed huddled near the wall fearing another blow
until he heard Justin’s quickly descending footsteps. He slowly turned his
head determining if it was all right for him to move. Once he concluded Justin
was gone; JC gradually stood up using the doorframe for support and then bracing
himself against it. His legs were even now a little wobbly and his vision blurry
but he needed to move and check out the damage. JC blinked a few times focusing
his eyes before he wandered toward the kitchen area.
When JC reached the kitchen
he heard footsteps behind him. Without looking the brunette said, “Justin, go
away I’m not ready for you yet. I’ll come talk to you later, when I’m
ready. We just need to calm down,” his voice was nothing more than a mere
whisper.
“It’s not Justin, C,” a
deep voice sounded.
“Lance?” JC turned and
faced the bass singer.
“Yeah, sweetie…holy shit
he fucking hit you,” Lance’s voice was laced with anger. “He didn’t tell
me that. Oh my God, he hit you. Are you all right?”
“Unn huh… I…I hit him,
too.” JC leaned against the counter and closed his eyes. “I’m the one who
hit him first.” He opened his eyes once more and stared directly at Lance,
“He was… he was just reacting to it, defending himself.”
“That may be true JC, but
you didn’t use a closed fist did you?” JC slowly shook his head. Lance
walked toward the older man and gently grabbed his chin. He tipped the
brunette’s head toward the light and examined the injury by probing it with
his other hand. JC closed his eyes as the blonde’s touch caused a wave of pain.
Lance grabbed a wet washcloth from the sink and carefully wiped up the blood
from JC’s face. “It isn’t broken but the girls in make up are gonna have a
fit about this one. What the hell happened between you and Justin? I mean we
heard the screaming and all, but I never thought it would come to blows.”
JC threw his hands up nearly
hitting Lance and exclaimed, “That’s just it Lance. I don’t know. I
don’t fucking have a clue. He just started in on me when I walked into the
room. I was gonna leave during the argument but he wouldn’t let me. He grabbed
my arm and made me stay, I was to scared to do anything else but stay.”
The blond man set down the
cloth and opened the icebox, pulling out a tray of ice. “Hand me a towel,
C.” JC obediently placed a towel in Lance’s out stretched hand and leaned
back against the counter. The bass poured the ice cubes into the towel and
wrapped them up securely. He walked over toward the brunette and handed him the
bundle. “You need to put that on your nose and just under your eye. Otherwise,
the swelling is gonna impact your vision.” JC took the towel and gingerly
placed it under his eye. “So what happened that caused you to slap Justin?”
JC looked away staring out a
side window. “He… he called me a slut.”
“He called you a slut. Why
would he do that?”
“Look Lance, if I knew the
answer to that fucking question I wouldn’t be standing here with a black eye
and a swollen nose. I think that’s a question you need to ask Justin.”
“Well, did he tell you
anything, give you a hint as to why he was pissed in the first place.”
JC turned his gaze toward
Lance, “How did you know that he was upset with me?”
“I didn’t really know he
was upset with you in particular, but I could tell by the way he was acting
something wasn’t right.”
“Oh… I don’t know, I
guess I’m just a bad boyfriend. Cuz, I didn’t notice anything until about
thirty minutes ago when he started yelling at me and calling me a slut. So I
guess, because I’m a slut and never know what the hell is going on, that gives
Justin the right to hit me.” JC fiddled with the towel for a moment before
continuing. “Where’s Justin?” he whispered.
“The little hot head is
talking with Joey and Chris right now. I wondered why he looked so guilty when
he came back there. I think he’s feeling really remorseful because he hit you.”
“That’s because he
promised he never would. He promised Lance and look at my face. I swore this
would never happen to me again and just fucking look at me.” JC started crying
uncontrollably. “Look… at my face.”
Lance quickly covered the
space between the two men and engulfed JC in an embrace. “Shh…it’s okay,
JC. Justin isn’t like Wade. He didn’t mean to hurt you.”
JC’s body gave out as he
collapsed into Lance. “That’s what Wade always said. He always said he
didn’t mean it but he kept doing it.”
Lance lifted JC’s sobbing body up and carried him
toward the couch. He laid the weary man down onto it and sat beside him. He
tenderly rubbed JC’s back while he watched the older man cry. How could you
do this to him Justin? You better make it right. He looked down at JC and
thought; you better make it right.