Two Years


Two years.

A short span of time, really, but to JC it felt like half his life had passed him by in those twenty four months.

Two years since Justin decided to start his solo career. Two years since *NSYNC lost it’s halfhearted battle to say together.

Two years since he’d lost the only person he’d ever loved.

He sighed into the ocean air, rising from the soft sand and walking towards the water. He stood there for a moment, closing his eyes and letting the cool water lap at his bare feet before continuing his journey down the beach, letting himself drift back to a time a little more than two years ago.

“So…um…is it true then? What Angie Stone said?”

Justin nodded avoiding the eyes of his bandmates. “But that doesn’t mean that’s the end of this,” he said, waving his arm. “Of us.”

Joey smiled sadly and clapped Justin on the back. “Sure, Jup. Of course it won’t.”

“Congratulations, Justin,” Lance said softly, pulling Justin into a tight embrace before following Joey and Chris, who hadn’t said a word, out of the room.

Deep down JC knew they were all happy about this. No matter how much Justin denied it, things were going to change. And they were all ready for that. Joey was ready to move on and be a father to Brianna, Lance was eager to pursue his Hollywood career, and Chris…well, Chris would do it forever it he could, but he would be glad to see it end, too.

But JC wasn’t ready. He didn’t want this to end, didn’t want to leave his four best friends. Couldn’t imagine life without Justin.

“This doesn’t change anything, Josh,” Justin said quietly, kneeling in front of JC and resting his cheek on JC’s knee. “I still love you…I’ll always love you.”


That was the beginning of the end.

Justin released his album, taking time off to promote and perform his own three month tour.

JC saw him three times during those three months. JC told himself that nothing was changing when Justin rolled away from his touch. Told himself nothing was changing when people were more interested in booking Justin Timberlake than *NSYNC. And told himself nothing was changing when he walked in on Justin, on his knees, in front of Wade.

“Jesus,..” he breathed, his leas threatening to collapse beneath him.

“Fuck!” Wade spat, shoving Justin away before pulling up his pants and rushing past JC.

JC felt sick. His head was spinning, his heart was racing, his knees were weak. “Josh,” Justin said quietly. “You knew it couldn’t last forever.” He rose to his feet and kissed JC softly on the cheek, whispering, “I’m sorry” before walking out of the room.


“You said you’d love me forever,” he whispered into the wind, running a hand through his wild brown hair. The highlights had long since faded, and it hung raggedly in his face. He scratched at the stubble on his chin. Two years ago today…the last time I saw him.

“It’s for the best,” Justin said, hugging Lance tightly. “We can’t go on like this or we’ll end up hating each other, and I can’t stand the thought of that,” he mumbled into Chris’s shoulder. “You take care of my nice, you hear?” he grinned at Joey through tear-glistened eyes. “I love you guys.”

“Good luck, Justin,” Lance said.

“We love you too, kid,” Joey said, wiping a tear from his cheek.

Chris just nodded, knowing that Justin would understand.

And JC stood back, eyes closed, arms folded, as Justin walked towards him. “Please keep in touch, JC. I love you most of all, you know that.”

With that and a chaste kiss to JC’s cheek, he got on a plane and flew out of their lives.


There was no point in trying to stop the tears now. They were flowing down his cheeks in streams and when he licked his lips, he could taste the salty wetness there.

He trudged up the beach toward his home, kicking the door open and tossing his sandles aside.

The phone was ringing. He let the machine get it.

“Josh, it’s Lance. Where are you, man? Everyone expects you to be here…I know it’s hard, but he’s your friend, Josh. Call me back on my cell. I hope you’re on your way.”

He laughed bitterly and lit the candles he’d set up around the room, breathing in the sweet scent of vanilla that he and Justin used to love so much.

Out of the corner of his eye, he saw the flap of the white invitation on the counter blow open. He closed his eyes and remembered.

“Hello?”

“Hey, Josh…it’s Lance.”

“Hey.”

“Um…I was just calling to see, ya know, if you were ok and all.”

”Why wouldn’t I be ok?”

Pause.

“Lance?”

“You…did you get your mail today?”

He frowned and scratched his head, thumbing through the pile of letters on his table. When he saw the small white envelope, he dropped the phone.

“Justin Randall Timberlake and Britney Jean Spears cordially invite you to attend…”


The phone was ringing again. He figured it was probably Lance, asking him where the hell he was, why he wasn’t at the wedding.

But he shouldn’t have to explain.

Justin hadn’t spoken to him for two years. Two years. And he expected JC to be at his wedding? Even knowing how JC felt about him?

No. There was no way JC was attending that wedding. He had other things to attend to. Things that were two years in the making.

He slumped into the cushions of the couch, eyeing the items he’d placed on the coffee table before he’d gone for his walk.

A picture. In a frame. Of he and Justin. When things were good, and they were happy. He reached out and ran his finger along the glass, allowing himself one final smile before reaching for the other item and pulling the trigger.

He didn’t hear the knock at the door two hours later.

He didn’t feel the tears of his former lover soaking into his skin.

He didn’t hear the whispered “I love you.”

It was two years too late.



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