Part 4


JC shivered as a cool breeze crept across his body.  He tucked the blanket under his chin and curled his knees to his chest, squeezing his eyes shut tight so the sun would stop invading his sleep.

He didn’t want to get out of bed today. Didn’t want to face the world…face Lance…face Justin.  

Thank God today was an off day for the group.  He could lay in bed all day and try to forget what had happened the night before.

Or so he thought.

A sharp knock at the door startled him, and he groaned irritably.  “Go away,” he shouted, burrowing deeper into the comfort of his bed.

“Josh?” Lance’s voice came through the door.  “Can I talk to you?”

JC sighed, throwing the covers off of his body in a huff.  “Yeah. Come on in,” he called, scrubbing his hands through his tousled hair.  

The door clicked open, and Lance strode in.  He was clad in boxers and a thin t-shirt, and he crossed his arms over his chest as he entered the room. “Damn, Jace, it’s cold in here. Shut the window.”

“Be my guest,” JC said, gesturing to the window.  Lance sighed as he closed it and sat down next to JC on the bed.

“What’s up, Lansten?” JC questioned, still upset that Lance had spilled his secret to Justin.

“Um…” Things already weren’t going as Lance had planned. He’d planned on coming in here and telling JC exactly what had made him let everything out to Justin.  He’d planned on telling JC that he was in love with him.  Seems that wasn’t going to be as easy as he’d hoped. “So how did you sleep?”

“Fine,” JC answered quickly. Almost too quickly; Lance frowned at him.

“You sure, Jace? You seem kinda…I dunno, off.”  

“I’m fine, Lance. Don’t worry about it,” JC lied.  

“You sure?  I mean—“

“I’m FINE, Lance,” JC snapped, cutting Lance off.

“Ok…”  Lance rubbed the back of his hand across the stubble on his chin, the knot in his stomach growing with each passing second.

“Did you come in here for a reason, Lance? Because I was really looking forward to sleeping all day.”

Lance sighed. This wasn’t a good time.  He shouldn’t have come in here.  “No. I just wanted to talk.  I’ll let you sleep.”  He stood from the bed and walked out, his heart heavy in his chest.  

JC slipped back underneath the covers, drawing the blankets up over his head and falling into a deep sleep.

                                                 

“So, Lance, what are you up to tonight?” Justin asked as he sprayed cologne on his chest.

“Not much.  Think I’ll just stay in and read a good book or something, maybe do some FreeLance work,” Lance answered, avoiding Justin’s eyes.

“Sure you don’t want to come out with me?”  Justin asked, a smile tugging at the corners of his mouth.

“Nah, thanks though, J. Maybe next time.”

“A’ight.  Where’s C?”

“He’s still in bed. Been there all day. I don’t think he was feeling too well this morning. Wanted to be left alone.”

Justin frowned. “Did he say why?”

“Nope, just wanted to be left alone.”  Lance studied Justin’s face, wondered why he was so concerned all of a sudden.

“Oh. Ok then. Well I’m heading out. I’ll be late, don’t wait up, “ he grinned before heading out the door.

“Asshole,” Lance said under his breath, curling up on the couch and reaching for the book he’d been waiting to read.

“He gone?” JC’s voice came from behind him.  Lance smiled as he turned to face his friend.  He was so adorable;  the way his hair was all messed up from sleeping all day, the way his hand rested on his bare stomach as he rubbed his eyes.

“Yeah, he’s gone.”

“Good. Last thing I need is to deal with his shit tonight,” JC said as he plopped down next to Lance on the couch.  “Sorry I was an ass this morning.”

“Hey, don’t worry about it,” Lance said, trying his best not to stare at JC’s toned body.

“I’m just upset about this whole thing, Lance.  I don’t know what I’m going to do.”

Lance took off his glasses and set them on the table along with the book he was holding. “Josh, I don’t know how many times I can say I’m sorry…I never wanted this to happen.”

But JC wasn’t listening. “And you know what, Lance?  I don’t even like Justin like that anymore. He’s such an ass, so full of himself, he thinks he can have whatever he wants. I don’t want someone like that, someone who’s not going to treat me right, someone who thinks I’m not good enough for them.”

“You don’t want him anymore?”

JC paused, thinking. “I don’t want to be with him anymore.  I’m still attracted to him. Fuck, everyone is.  But I’m only attracted to his physical appearance.  The way he acts turns me off…completely.”

The knot in Lance’s stomach was slowly coming back, and he swallowed hard. “What kind of guy do you want to be with, Jace?” he dared to ask.

A small grin lifted JC’s lips as he spoke.  “Someone sweet…someone who loves me for me…who doesn’t think that they’re better than me…someone who’s humble, and caring, and passionate about life…” He turned and looked into Lance’s pale green eyes and smiled.  “Someone like you, Lance.”

Lance’s heart stopped.  A voice in his head was nagging him, “Tell him, Lance. Tell him now, or you’ll never get another chance like this.”  Lance knew the voice was right.  He just wished he wasn’t so damn scared.

“Jace?” he said quietly, avoiding the azure gaze of his friend.

“Yep?”

“Um…there’s…uh…there’s something I have to tell you.”  

JC’s brow furrowed slightly, and he scooted closer to Lance. “You ok, man?”

“Um…it’s…about why…why I told Justin.”

“I’m listening.”

“Ok. I don’t want you to say one word until I’m finished, ok?  Not one.  Sit there and keep quiet until I’m done. OK?”

JC giggled.  “Ok. I’m confused, but ok.”

Lance took a deep breath and began.  “Justin told me that if I didn’t tell him how you felt about him…”

He looked at JC, who’s eyes were full of curiosity.

“If I didn’t tell him how you felt about him…fuck this is hard…” He ran a hand through his blond hair and shook his head. “If I didn’t tell him how you felt about him…” he looked into JC’s soft blue eyes. “He would have told you how I feel about you.”

JC’s eyes clouded with confusion, but he kept his promise not to say a word until Lance was finished.

“I…Josh…I’m…I’minlovewithyou,” he blurted, immediately drawing his eyes away from JC’s penetrating gaze.

And as if knowing Lance still had more to say, JC didn’t speak.  Instead, he took Lance’s hand and squeezed it lightly, silently urging his friend to go on.

“I should have told you.  I should have told you a long, long time ago.  But then you told me how you felt about Justin, and fuck, Josh, I can’t compete with Justin Timberlake. The man is fucking beautiful, and—“

JC had to break in. He couldn’t let Lance go on like this.

“And so are you,” he said softly, still holding Lance’s hand.  Lance felt the blush creep up his cheeks, and he tried his best not to let a goofy grin take over his mouth.

“You promised not to say anything until I was finished,” Lance whispered, although he couldn’t hide how happy he was about JC’s comment.

“I’m sorry. Continue.”

“I’m sorry I told Justin. I’m sorry for what he did to you at the restaurant yesterday.  And I’m sorry I didn’t tell you how I feel.  But Josh?”

JC nodded, not speaking.

“The man you just described, the man you want to be with…I want to be him. I want to treat  you like a king, and be sweet to you, and love you for who you are…hell, I already DO love you for who you are.”

The next few seconds passed in slow motion for Lance.  JC moved closer to him, his face inches away, then slowly, gently pressed his lips to Lance’s.  It was the sweetest kiss Lance had ever experienced.  And Justin ruined it.

“Well isn’t this cute,” he said, sarcasm dripping from his lips.  “Get a room, you two,” he hissed, slamming his keys on the counter.

“J-justin…what are you doing back?” JC asked, jumping away from Lance.  

“I got halfway there and realized I forgot my ID.”  An obvious lie.  Everyone knew who Justin was. He didn’t need an ID to get in anywhere.  “So you finally got up the guts to tell him, huh Lance?”

“Shut up, Justin,” JC said quietly, trying unsuccessfully to glare at Justin.

Justin laughed bitterly. “Well I hope you two will be very happy together. Let’s just hope he doesn’t scream out my name when you’re fucking, right Lance?”  Grabbing whatever it was that he’d forgotten, Justin left again.



next

Email: whatweallwishfor@yahoo.com