Part 12


JC’s palms were sweating as he reached up to knock on Lance’s door for the second time that day. It felt like an eternity before the door cracked open, and when it did, all the air rushed from his lungs in anticipation.

“Justin, open the door,” he heard Lance say, and took a step backwards as the door opened all the way.

He smiled at Justin shyly, his heart skipping a beat when Justin returned the grin. “Hi,” Justin said quietly.

“Hi.”

“Um…you wanna come in, or…”

“Actually, I was hoping we could go somewhere,” JC said, eyeing Lance, who was standing next to Justin, carefully. “Is that ok with you?”

Justin looked to Lance as if looking for an answer, and JC felt anger boil in the pit of his stomach. What right did Lance have to tell Justin what to do? To take Justin out of JC’s life?

“Justin, you should go,” Lance said, patting Justin on the back.

Maybe Lance wasn’t so bad after all.

“Are you sure?” Justin whispered, eyes darting back and forth between Lance and JC.

Lance nodded, pushing Justin out the door. “Have fun. You two have a lot of catching up to do.”

Justin leaned forward and kissed Lance on the cheek, and JC felt like he might throw up. “You ready?”

Justin looked up, smiling. “Let’s go.”

***

They rode in silence, Justin picking at a stray thread on his shirt. His heat was beating a mile a minute, and his stomach was doing nervous flip flops.

“You mind if I put a CD in?” JC asked, and Justin jumped, startled out of the silence by JC’s voice.

“No, not at all.”

JC smiled as he slid the disc into the CD player and pushed play. Justin frowned slightly as the music drifted between them; the notes sounded familiar to him, but he couldn’t figure out why.

When the visions around you
Bring tears to your eyes
And all that surround you are secrets and lies
I’ll be your strength, I’ll give you hope
Keeping your faith when it’s gone.
The one you should call
Was standing here all along…


He closed his eyes, leaning his head against the window, and remembered.

“JC? Are you home?”

“In here, baby!”

“What are you doing?”

“I have something for you.”

“Yeah?”

JC nodded, smiling shyly.

“For what?”

“Because I love you. Do I need another reason?”

“I guess not,” Justin laughed.

“Sit down and I’ll play it for you.”

“Play it for me?”

JC nodded, pressing play on the CD player.

“I wrote this for you. And sang it too, even though you know I don’t like to sing my own songs.”

“JC—“

“Shhh. Just listen.”

Until the day my life is through
This I promise you…
This I promise you…


Justin opened his eyes when he realized that he was singing along and that a very shocked JC had pulled over to the side of the road and was currently staring at him through wide blue eyes.

“You…you remember.”

Justin swallowed hard, then nodded. “How could I forget?”

“I still love you.”

“I’m with Lance.”

JC stared at Justin, his eyes welling up with tears. “I know,” he whispered.

“I’m confused, JC,” Justin said quietly, reaching out and covering JC’s hand with his own.
“Confused?”

Justin nodded, turning his gaze to the window. “I didn’t remember you. When I got here, I mean. I…I killed Joe, and I came here, because it was the only thing I remembered about myself. And Lance…well, he found me, just sitting on a curb, and took me in.”

“What happened, Justin? How did you end up…” He couldn’t say the last word. It was too hard.

“Together?”

JC nodded, squeezing his eyes shut.

“He helped me. He took me into his home, bought me new clothes to wear, let me use his car whenever I needed to so that I could maybe figure out something about myself. He held me when I had nightmares, let me cry myself to sleep…and it just…happened.”

“Do you love him?”

“I think I could.”

“Do you love me?”

Justin didn’t answer, just squeezed JC’s hand tightly and bit his lower lip.

“I’ll bring you home,” JC choked, pulling his hand from Justin’s grasp.

“JC, no!” Justin pleaded. “I don’t want to go back yet…please. I…I like being here with you.”

“You don’t know how hard this is, Justin. How hard it is not to be able to hold you.”

“Yes I do, JC. How do you think I felt when I first got taken away? When Joe tied me up and sat in front of me, touching himself while he looked at pictures of you? How do you think it felt when he forced me to talk about you, to tell him what you were like in bed, how big your cock was? How do you think it felt, JC, when he told me I’d never see you again?” Justin was choking on his sobs by now, tears streaming down his cheeks.

“Justin,” JC gasped, leaning over the seat and gathering Justin in his arms. “Shh, baby, don’t cry. I’m here now, it’s ok.”

“He made me forget you, JC,” Justin wailed, clinging to JC as if he was going to disappear into thin air. “He made me forget you.”

JC held Justin until he cried as many tears as his heart held, rocking him back and forth, whispering soothing words into his ear.

“It’s ok, Justin. He’s gone now, he can’t hurt you anymore.”

“JC?”

“Yeah, baby?”

“I want to go home now.”

JC pulled away, looking at Justin in confusion before nodding, starting the car and driving toward Lance’s.

JC jumped when Justin’s hand slid onto his inner thigh. “JC,” he whispered, leaning closer.
“This isn’t the end of this, ok? This isn’t the last time you’re going to see me. I promise.”

JC swallowed hard, nodding.

“I’m just…it’s been a long day, and this is a lot for me to handle, ya know?”

“I know, Just.”

“Thank you for understanding.”

“I love you. I’d do anything for you.”

“I know.”

The rest of the drive was silent except for the sound of their breathing. Their hands rested on JC’s knee, fingers intertwined, as they pulled into Lance’s driveway.

“Can I call you tomorrow?” Justin asked, his eyes suddenly shy.

“Of course you can.”

“OK,” Justin smiled, slipping his hand from JC’s and opening the car door. “Thanks, JC. For today.”

“Anything for you, Justin.”

“Bye.”

JC flinched when the car door slammed, his heart breaking as the door to the house opened and Lance stepped out, pulling Justin into his arms, kissing his neck tenderly.

”Good bye, Justin,” JC whispered to no one.



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