Your EHW Champion, Rob Van Dam!!!!
| Name:
Stephen Valiant |
Height: 6'1" |
Weight:
200lbs |
From:
#Tripani, Sicily |
| Finisher:
The Pimento Groove |
Finisher Description: Diamond Cutter |
Real Name:
Stephen Corleone |
Debut:
January 22nd, 2003 |
|
|
N
M
W
|
Stephen Valiant
|
C
O
M
M
I
S
H
|
 |
 |
 |
 |
 |
| People Used |
People mentioned |
oQuality |
Achievements |
Location |
| Stephen Valiant Cameraman
|
Shay Semmens Chris Bond |
B- |
NMW Commish |
Condo in Lipari |
The Toast Of The Coast
|
It seems that a cameraman has gone on holiday. The camera is no longer in the grimy bowels of the NMW arena, but to a more dignified setting. The camera begins a 360-degree pan of the sites. He seems to be in a luxurious condo with tinted glass windows all around him. A beach can be seen down below as the small waves crash against the rocks. There are luscious green mountains surrounding the condo and a small village can just be seen near the water. Classical music is heard playing in the background of the lavish condo and the back of an enormous leather chair and be seen bobbing slightly in tune with the music. The cameraman makes an uneasy cough to get some attention and the classical music stops. The leather chair stops bobbing as it turns around to reveal a vaguely familiar face. It is the face of a figurehead in the NMW, a face that belongs to the Commissioner of the NMW…the face of Stephen Valiant!
Cameraman: I was told to bring a camera to this location.
Mr. Valiant continues to stare into the cameraman’s eyes but makes no movement.
Cameraman: This is the condo of Stephen Valiant, correct?
Stephen Valiant: …
Cameraman: Sir?
Stephen Valiant: Yes, you are rather slow. I will address no one unless they recognise me as a man of superiority.
Cameraman: Ok...
Stephen Valiant: Ok, Sir! Now cease your vulgar speak and allow me to address the NMW.
Cameraman: Yes…Sir.
Valiant straightens his five thousand dollar suit, places his hands on his polished desk and looks dead square into the camera lens.
Stephen Valiant: Ladies, Gentlemen and Children of the NMW audience, I feel I have some explaining to do. Many of you think I have abandoned my job as Commissioner of the NMW, let me get one thing perfectly clear right now…I have done nothing of the sort. My so-called superior, Shay Semmens, appointed me to the position of Commissioner. He then had a sudden change of heart and told me to take a vacation; he assumed that he could take care of the NMW all on his lonesome. Then, suddenly, reality hit him and he decided to give me a call to beg for me to come back and help him out. Being the good soul I am, I have accepted his invitation to come back to the NMW and take my rightful place as the Commissioner.
Back at the arena, a few fans cheer but most are silent due to the fact that they have no idea what Valiant is like.
Stephen Valiant: Now, things worked out well for me, you see, my Father fell ill while I was on vacation and I was forced to take the, how shall I put this, Family Business. Now I learnt many things in this business, methods of persuasion and fear among many others, and I realised, what if I applied these strategies from the “Business” to the NMW. Now I believe this is a grand idea and I urge the Superstars to watch for these, signs.
The audience is puzzled by what SV means by this, so they simply shrug and go about their business.
Stephen Valiant: Now, as I said. I will be returning shortly to the NMW, but as you can see, I am in no rush. The longer Shay wallows in the mess he has created, the better. I plan to spend some time up here in my Condo in Lipari before I head back to the cesspool of corruption that is the NMW. I will be most probably making my first card for Sickness from here in Lipari or for that matter, any other of my Condos in Europe.
Much of the ostentatious vocabulary is too much for the duller members of the audience, so many people have zoned out by now.
Stephen Valiant: Just one more matter before I leave you, a person who has been troubling me since his debut in the NMW, I am talking about Christopher Bond. Now, Chris, what gives you the audacity to even consider taking my job? The thought of you as a Commissioner makes my insides turn with pity, thinking of what you would to a company with so much potential. Chris, you will NEVER become the Commissioner of the NMW, simply because you are not good enough. You do not have the mental force to uphold such a job and you never will and do you know why? It is because you are a wrestler, a man who fights for a living, who jumps of turnbuckles and breaks their neck for a pay-check. You do not have the brain for this line of work and I hope, in time, you realise this instead of trying to pursue such impractical goals.
Now good people, I bid you farewell until the next time we meet.
The camera does a fade out until nothing is left on the titantron.
|
|
