So, who are these poor pathetic Slytherins we're torturing constantly with cruddy fics? It was a hard choice to make, actually. We wanted to take the Slyths who were the most well-developed, the ones able to handle enough senseless writing and the ones...
Fuck it. We decided to take the ones with the most mental problems, throw them in a room together, and watch them annihilate the fic and, more than likely, each other.
If you've read one of the MiSTs already without reading this page, you will see exactly why we took the ones we did. They don't just rift, they bash each other. Such is the Slytherin tendency.
Now, let us take a look at these warped characters.
Lord Voldemort
Mentioned first because he demands it so. He is, normally, the one in control in the MiSTs, mainly because the other MiSTers fear him...or want to screw him. Since Voldemort is hard to control, we decided it would be easier to get Tom Riddle into the game. However, Tom does have a tendency to move into Voldemort territory if pushed far enough. If there's going to be any killing involved, he's the one who's doing it. Kept under control by massive amounts of lithium, he spouts out everything, be it bitter or the obvious. Hell, he's got opinions even on things he knows nothing about.
Riddle- I heard that.
Severus Snape
What Slytherin MiST would be complete without the most paranoid, malicious, stubborn, cruel git of all time? Severus is the more tactful of the group, knowing when to stay out of certain territories and when to malign another MiSTers good name. He and Riddle have a never-ending feud mostly due to Snape turning traitor, and their fights tend to take on a life of their own. Severus is normally the one to call out technicalities and state the more bitter comments. While he maintains a healthy dislike for the other occupants, there is one who can keep his mind off trying to kill Riddle and back where it belongs. Right on...
Lucius Malfoy
Aristocratic to no end, Lucius joined the group to give it more prestige. At least, that's what he believes. He isn't affected too much by the fanfics, preferring instead to indulge his crush on Riddle, his current love interest of Severus Snape, and his often cruel flirtations with the fourth member of the team. Lucius' comments are normally more of a sexual nature, assuming he's not going off on a tangent concerning his Malfoy heritage. He's the one with the book all about Mary Sues and their 'Sue-isms.' A book which Severus Snape wants to burn with a passion.
Lucius: The book is a godsend. It keeps me safe from all self-inserts. Pity you don't have one, Sev. Maybe then you wouldn't be raped by so many.
Severus: I hate my life. This just adds to my torture. Why can't people just hate me? That's what I want!
Ron Weasley
The last, but not least, member of the group. Ron was brought about due to the need of a Gryffindor influence in the cast. Ron has morals. And they are quickly shucked out the window by the cutting remarks of his Slytherin cohorts. Ron is the typical teenager, overflowing with hormones and the usual slang associated with his age group. He's quick to defend his absent Gryffindor peers, is persistent when he can't have his way, and never passes up a chance to insult his least favorite Professor. One really must pity Mr. Weasley. If someone's getting killed, it's generally him. Having to deal with Lucius' teasing, Severus' hatred, and Voldemort's indifference, Ron has found himself a nice little niche in the group. Assuming he could just keep his hands off a certain Dark Lord...
Ron: I am not flirting with the Dark Lord!
And that covers our cast.
Second Season
Newest Characters!
Walden Macnair
Just when you thought that there couldn't be anyone more obsessed with sex than Lucius, Walden enters the scene. Sadly classified as a 'lesser character' in most fanfics, Walden seeks to rectify this by making his presence known within the MSTs' audience. Adored by Lucius and quite 'friendly' with Riddle, Macnair fulfills his role as the obnoxious, leering psychopathic executioner everyone loves but no one writes about.
Walden: You forgot to mention that I claim my own farts. Unlike some other people I could name...
Oh, PS: Two words - minibar
Arthur Weasley
After an argument with his wife gone wrong, Arthur Weasley found himself on the wrong side of the MST theater and now 'enjoys' the company of the three worst Slytherins known to mankind. Arthur is typically the voice of reason in the crowd which does him no good whatsoever. While this Gryffindor is your typical straight-shooter, he has shown signs of cracking under the pressure and who knows what will happen when the man finally loses it?
