Hands of The Divine
By Clayton Sedler
I awoke this morning full of angered vigor, remembering the last few seconds of an incredibly realistic dream that had caused my temper to soar above the rooftops. Waking up and feeling strong emotions of hate, anger, and vengeance had pushed my psyche past its limits. “What a great day this has started to be”, I thought to myself. I wanted to roll over in my bed, face the wall and put holes in it with bare-fisted knuckles. I wanted to pull the 2x4s out of the wall with my teeth and break the boards over my knee!
Waking up to a completely negative state of mind and wanting to destroy my personal, humble abode from the inside out is not a very healthy way to start your day. Lying their staring at the ceiling my skin writhing with inexplicable feelings of hate and loathing. Visions of the dream dominated my thought process. The more I thought of the dream, the more terrible it made me feel. I could not get those monstrous visions out of my thought process. Analyzing the dream in my head, back and forth. “What did this horrendous vision mean?” I kept questioning myself, as if someone else was inside my head listening to the questions! Answerless, my pain still resided in me. Brooding in my bed-sheets of pain, I rolled over to face the window. Rays of sunshine shone through the window causing me to squint my eyes.
“Lordy, Lordy, Lordy, why me?”, I thought to myself silently. This is my day-off. I am supposed to be excited and ready to enjoy a full day of zero responsibility. The anger and hate still bubbling inside of me lead me to feel lethargic and bloated. I wanted to get out of bed and start my day, but my feelings of anger, and hate, filled my mind. My body felt as though I had just eaten a large steak dinner with a huge twice-baked potato and a heaping helping of chocolate pudding with vanilla ice cream. The anger bloating me up inside as a steak dinner would have pushed the seams holding my body together to its limits.
Still lying in bed swimming around in my own self-pities, I somehow slowly without realizing it had become entranced by the sunlight. Even though it somewhat hurt my eyes to stare into it. I felt a certain sense of calming! Gazing into the exuberant light, I imagined what I perceived to be as God holding me upside down by my ankles spanking my bare naked buttocks as a doctor would spank a new born infant to help the baby cough up the amniotic fluid that resided in its lungs from its mother. I imagined myself hanging upside down as the newborn infant would. All my problems, fears, and anxieties escaped my lungs draining out through my mouth. As soon as I realized how ridiculous this thought was that my imagination had conjured up, I quickly tried to forget it! I turned back over onto my back, away from the light and began to stare at the ceiling once more. Finally I decided I had better get up. Upon raising my head up off the pillow and sitting up, I said aloud, “God if you’re really there, then prove it!” Still sitting on my bed, I looked around the room waiting for some sort of sign. Curiously, I sat for a few seconds hoping to see some sort of miraculous event take place such as a lamp begin to float or a vision of the Virgin Mary appear before my eyes. Sadly, nothing appeared. “Hmnph”, I said out loud sarcastically.
I had never been a religious man. I never really believed in the power of prayer or in going to church. So the thought of me being in atonement with God quickly left my thoughts as I removed myself from the bed.
I began my daily routine as usual, by walking into the kitchen in my underwear and turning on the coffeepot. I then walked into the living room towards the front door. Upon opening the front door I reached outside to grab the daily newspaper. Shutting the door I went over to the TV, grabbed the remote from atop the TV, went over to my easy chair, sat down and opened up the paper. I turned on the TV and began to check out the headlines. Gazing down at the front page, I notice; Congressman convicted of fraud, Kansas City Police officer dies, man shot and killed in drug bust, woman found raped and murdered, rash car bombings in Israel. The news wasn’t really anything new. The same violence and chaos that happened everyday, but took place in different locations. Glancing up from the paper to catch the weather on the news; fair to partly cloudy, chance of showers.
Feeling the urge to use the bathroom with paper in hand, I rose up from my chair and went to bathroom to sit upon my throne and contemplate my kingdom. Zoning out while reading, my mind began to be filled with true stories of death, greed, and ignorance. Sitting upon my throne, brain washing myself with real-life horror stories, physically concentrating on excreting bowel, I heard a knock arise at the front door.
“Oh, what perfect timing”, I thought to myself. “I’m pinching off a loaf and somebody’s knocking at my door, who the hell could it be?” I wondered. Instantly the knocking grew louder and I could hear someone yelling through the door, “Hellooooooooo, is anybody in there, Hellooooooo, is there anyone home!” The voice was loud, but not of any sort of a negative tone. “Waiaiaiaiait, give me a couple minutes, uh hang-on, give me a second!” I frantically began cleaning myself as fast as I could. Still feeling unclean, I pulled up my underwear and ran to the front door.
Wondering just who might be knocking at my door, I peered through the peephole. On the other side of the door I saw a man whom I’ve known all my life, but never met before. From the other side of the door the man asked me, “Are ya gonna let me in?” Perplexed, checking to make sure the chain lock was firmly fastened, I cracked open the door. “Can I help you?” I asked quizzically. He laughed to himself and said, “ I don’t need your help, I’m here to help you!” Grinning from ear to ear bright shining teeth he said, “Well, aren’t you going to let me in, you asked for me didn’t you?” Bewildered by his mannerisms I was at a loss for words. “What can I do to help you sir?” I asked him once again. “Boy, some people are just so blind, even when I come and start knocking on the door they don’t even see me!” “ Sir”, I said, “ If you do not state your business I am going to shut the door!” I told him vehemently! The man shook his head seeming to be disgusted a bit with me, “Well brother you said prove it!” I quickly cut him off and said, “Sir, state your business or leave!”
Gritting his teeth, but somehow still managing to smile, “When you first woke up this morning you felt like crap didn’t you?” “Yes”, I replied, “But!” “ But nothing,” he shot quickly, “you prayed to me in a vision to cure your ailment, didn’t you?” “Yes”, I replied. He spoke quickly and with conviction, “You felt better and you didn’t even realize it and then you made a sheepish, sarcastic a comment towards me!” “But, I didn’t feel any better after I.” He quickly cut my words off again, “ You had the ability to get out of bed and live another day didn’t you!” “Uh, yes,” I replied humbly. “ Well then, are you going to let me in or not”, the man from the other side of the threshold said with conviction!
For some unbeknownst reason I shut the door and opened the chain lock. I took one step back and flung the door wide open! “Well it’s about time you let me in!”, he said smiling sarcastically! Feeling ashamed somewhat of not being fully dressed and feeling a bit unclean. I asked him, “Would you mind if I ran and took a quick shower, I really wasn’t expecting company today?” “Sure,” he replied quaintly. “It will only take about ten minutes”, I added, “If that makes you feel more comfortable around me, then go for it!” “Great, uhhh, just uh, make yourself at home, there’s the TV remote, uhmnm, the daily paper is on the chair, help yourself to anything in the kitchen, I told him nervously. I really didn’t know what to say? How was I supposed to act in front of God? Rivers of doubt began to pour into my thought process again. Do I really have God sitting here or is this some crazy fool that coincidentally just showed up at my door.
“Yes its really me, no I am not some crazy fool!” he said to me! Astounded by what he told me, I could not think of the words to reply. He just smiled at me, grinning from ear to ear, showing his amazingly, beautiful white teeth. “Oh,” he said, “ I appreciate you inviting me in. You have a cozy little apartment!” “Thank you”, I replied still flabbergasted by his ability to read my mind.
I showered with the quickness of lightning. I dressed even quicker. Finally, fully dressed and cleansed I walked into the living room. God was sitting on the couch glancing through the paper while watching the news. Upon realizing I was in the room God put down the paper “Why do you continually brainwash yourself with the daily news!” Bewildered by his statement I didn’t know how to answer his question. With a disorganized look upon my face, I simply replied, “I don’t know.” It was the only response I could muster. Concerned, God said, “It’s great to read about current events, but what exactly are you reading. Are you reading about something intelligent and informative or are you constantly reading about the death and violence, which is the garbage, the media regularly putt’s out. Do you know that reading about death and violence on a daily basis begins to brainwash us into thinking constant negative thoughts! I also really don’t understand the weather forecast on news programs? Nobody can predict the weather, it is impossible!” Feeling pretty stupid for not knowing I was being foolish all these years, I began to start to apologize to God. But before the words emitted from my mouth, God spoke, “Don’t feel stupid you didn’t know, the only way you can be foolish now is to not do something to correct it!” “How do I correct it God?”, I asked. “Start reading novels, read the Dictionary, read history books, read everything you can possibly get your hands on, read things that enrich your imagination, not things that lead you to think of death and how bad the world is!” “O.K.”, I replied, “Where do I find this information?” “The first place to start on your quest of knowledge is to go obtain a library card!” I shook my head in complete agreeance with him as if I already knew the answer to my question. “Oh and by the way”, God said, “Please call me Robert or Rob, or just simply Bob will be fine.” “Bob it is!”, I told him joyfully.
“Well Bob do you mind if I ask you some questions?” “Not at all fire away!” “I’m sure everybody has the same questions as I do.” “Shoot !”, said Bob smiling radiantly! “O.K., what is the purpose of life?” “That truly is a question that everyone asks.”, Bob replied. “The answer to your question is simple- we seek the answer to our purpose- our purpose is not in the answer, the answer is actually in seeking, we must continue to seek that is our purpose and bye not continually seeking we are not fulfilling our purpose.” “Wo!”, I said aloud, “You’re right, I know you’re right because your answer feels right!” “Well you had better go and get that library card!”, said Bob shining brightly.
“I would bet your next question will be is there life after death?”, said Bob! “Your good Bob, real good!”, I told him watching his eyes overflow with the truth of knowledge. “Yes there is life after death, I will not go into the physical logistics behind it, but I will tell you how to access to your own perception of what heaven ought to be. The more love and kindness that you give and plant throughout the world is an immediate reflection of your life in heaven!” “With that tid-bit of knowledge you must realize how you affect others life’s when you come in contact with them. You must ask yourself when you leave that person or persons’ presence did you leave them feeling happy and loved or did you leave them upset and distraught?” “If you leave everyone you come in contact with feeling loved then you will obtain the highest thrones in heaven!”
“Well so what are your plans for this splendid day off?”, asked Bob with a cheerfully, jeerful grin! “Well, I don’t know, I thought maybe I would go down to the boats and play a few slots and maybe have a few martinis.” “You know what, that sounds like a great idea?” said Bob! “You know I haven’t been to a casino for years this sounds like this could be a grand occasion!” added Bob with a hint of glee.
“OK”, I said, surprised that God would be so eager to adventure into a gambling establishment. Bob stood up and asked “Are we ready to begin our grand quest?” “Let me grab my wallet and my keys and we can leave.” I told him. Without me realizing it Bob’s positive attitude began conjuring up thoughts of me winning a small jackpot
As we headed out the door Bob began to speak, “Have you ever wondered why people are racist?” “Never really thought to much about it, but I figure it probably comes from our parents being prejudice.” I replied. As we walked out of the front door of my apartment complex Bob said, “Partially, the roots of all racism stems from fear.” “Really, how’s that?”, I asked, thinking that was somewhat of a goofy answer he gave. “I figured you probably would.” He said. “The truth of the matter is a majority of the human race fears the unknown, we fear what is different from us.” I looked at him nodding my head hanging to his every word. “We are as a society a lot better than we used to be, slavery used to run rampant throughout the world!” “We as a people are starting to figure out that the only way to overcome our fears is not by trying to dominate it with physical exuberance, but by plastering a huge grin on your face and sticking your hand out for a friendly handshake!” “It’s a very simple concept to understand!” he said laughing quaintly his dimples stretching across his cheeks without fortitude. “If we embraced our fears with a genuine positive attitude and a smile on our face can you imagine the possibilities of how enriched everyone’s life’s would be right now!” “There probably would have been a thousand more Egyptian temples built!” said Bob while climbing inside my pick-up truck. “If the slaves would have been paid a descent wage and were able to obtain descent housing to raise a family, they would have had a different attitude toward life and thus would have worked harder.”
Upon inserting the key into the ignition of my pick-up truck I started the vehicle and headed for the exit of my apartment complex. Thoughts and questions flooded my thinking process. There are so many questions I wanted to ask God, I really could not figure out a good starting point. “Ask me anything!” Bob spoke aloud. “Alright!” I said curiously. “Were do we come from.” “We all started from a large pool of bacteria.” He said profoundly as if I should have known the answer to that question. “A bed of genetic bacterial plasmic goo is what we have arisen from!” “Quite amazing isn’t it?” he asked quizzically. “Yes it is.” The concept of that made sense because we are all derived from genetic material being made up of DNA.
Entering onto the Highway entrance ramp I turned to ask Bob, but before I could say anything he spoke, “The reason why there cannot be peace throughout the lands is because we have not chosen to be peaceful. It never ceases to amaze me the United states sends military troops over to the middle east as peace keepers, but to my dismay they are sent with weapons of might such as guns and tanks! I have never seen a peacekeeper with a weapon in his hand. A peacekeepers only weapon should be his knowledge and wits.” “But, the people over in the Middle East have been fighting for years with guns and things like that.” “They constantly have people like us trying to dominate them and using devices of destruction to try and control the situation they have no choice other than to rebel in order to survive.” With a upbeat tone of voice Bob said, “It would be nice if we could have peace across the land, but were all so damn afraid of each other!” “Anyway, don’t get me started on that situation over there! When I start thinking about the way the Middle East situation is being handled it almost starts to make me angry.” “I will tell you if we all treated every man and woman we came into contact with as our best friend then peace across the land would have a lot of potential!” “That’s a good idea.” I told Bob. I had never thought of such a powerful concept.
Bob rolled down the window and stuck his head slightly out, “Thank you for this wonderful day!” yelled Bob outside the window as if he was trying for someone on a mountaintop to hear his cry. He turned to me and said, “You know we must always be gracious and appreciative of what we have and of what is around us.” “Alright.” I said knowing that I was very thankful for the things I had worked hard to obtain throughout my life. Quaintly Bob said, “If you would have been more gracious towards your wife you would not have fell out of love with her and gotten divorced.” “You always took her love for granted and you very seldom showed her a loving attitude.” Being hurt by truthful words I replied somewhat scornfully, “Well she always took my love for granted!” “Well if you always would have used a gentle, gracious loving attitude towards her she never would have taken you for granted.” Feeling somewhat resentful towards God for bringing up such a touchy subject I decided to shut-up and not ask him anything. “I know the truth hurts. The whole situation was not entirely your fault. You both screwed up. Neither of you were ready to tackle the adventure of being married.”
“How much more time do we have till we arrive at the casino.” Asked Bob. “About fifteen minutes.” I replied. “Great, do you mind if I smoke?” He asked. I thought would I really tell God no, but what perplexed me even more was the fact that God smoked! “Go for it!” I replied. Bob reached behind and into his left back pocket and pulled out a small shiny silver cigarette case. “Yep, I think once people actually start realizing that in fact they really are afraid of the unknown a lot things like racism, war, ignorance and greed will come to an end!” said God exuberantly. Bob removed an unbranded cigarette from the case and placed it between his lips. “Augh damnit.” I heard Bob say under his breath. Laughing to myself because I know I just heard God speak a curse word I pushed in the button for my cigarette lighter. “Give it a minute to warm up.” I told him. “Thank you!” He replied happily. The lighter popped up resembling a timer on oven-roasted turkey. Bob reached over and removed the lighter from the dash and lit his cigarette. He took a long endowed drag from the cigarette and held in the smoke as if it was his last puff. “Augh, I needed that!” he said as smoke was being exhaled. The smoke seemed to dance about and cradle his face. “Would you care to share some of mother-nature’s love with me?” he asked smiling mischievously! “No thank you, I quit smoking many years ago.” I told him with affirmation. “Yeah I know. It would have killed you if you would have kept smoking!” he told me. Bob took another long deep drag from his no-name cigarette and held the smoky fumes inside his lungs as long as he could. “We must savor every indulgence as if it was our last.” He affirmed. As the fumes bellowed out from amongst his lung cavity, I could smell the sensation of a fragrance that I had not smelled since I was in college.
Oh my God, I thought to myself, is this really happening! God is smoking a doobie! “Hey, I offered to share my love with you and you cordially declined,” spouted Bob! “I just can’t believe your doing drugs in my vehicle!", I said vehemently! With a tremendous smile and smoke tunneling throughout the cabin of my pick-up Bob spoke, “You were addicted to Nicotine at one point in your life were you not?” Flabbergasted bye the whole situation I was not even quite sure how to respond to any question he was about ready to ask me. “Yes I was, but I gave it up because I knew it would kill me.” “OK then what is the difference between marijuana and tobacco, can you tell me?” he asked awaiting an answer. “Well for one marijuana is illegal and it can lead to other hard-core drugs!” I replied to his question with as much affirmation as I could muster. God began to speak with an outpouring of knowledge, “You smoked some marijuana and did some experimenting when you were in college did you not?” “Yes, I did.” Feeling somewhat ashamed for having done so. “Did it kill you and ruin your life?” “No, actually at the time it was a lot of fun. Me and bunch of my college friends on occasion would get together and smoke some out in a field and philosophize about life and where we came from and discuss the deeper meanings of life.” “Usually you guys sat around and talked about women and which one’s you had a sexual experience with!” said Bob laughing somewhat to himself. “Ha, haha, yeah you are right.” I replied laughing with him. “Listen to me if you will, the two most powerful drugs known to mankind are legal, do you know which one’s they are?” “I’m not exactly sure what you are getting at.” I told him. “Alcohol and Tobacco are two most dangerous drugs available to mankind and they are both legal. Now think of all the havoc these two drugs ensue on people, the car crashes, cancer! The possibilities for these drugs to create chaos in our society are infinite! Back in the sixties Nixon announced the war on drugs, which was basically done for the political betterment of his career. The war on drugs started because a man wanted to save face and hopefully save his career. He did not stop to see the real problem is not the drugs themselves or the people who traffic them, but the people who take them and why! The war on drugs has really turned into a political war on people and morals. You must ask yourself why do people become addicted to drugs? They become addicted to try and fill some sort of unfillable void in their life. Every year our Government of the United States focuses its resources on the problem, which is the flow of our drugs throughout our society. They increasingly spend billions of dollars every year on the problem! Why do they do this? Because the majority believes that drugs are morally wrong! I agree drugs can and will handicap you. What the Government needs to do is focus more on the solution instead of the problem which is; Why do people take drugs? If the Government starts focusing on the solution instead of problem our jails will not be so over crowded, there will be less violence on the streets! Imagine with me for a second if all drugs were legal as though they should be; people would not have to rob or kill to have another fix. If you could buy crack over the counter at your local pharmacy for a cheaper price on the streets that would remove dealers from the street, it would remove a lot of the guns from the streets, it would remove a lot of criminal element from the street because there would no longer would be a crime in getting Hi.” “That’s absurd!” I told God! “You agree with a majority of society because all you see is the effects that drugs can do to a human being, but what we have not stopped to figure out is why people take drugs. You know the ironic thing is we spend more money every year on the War on Drugs and we never win. The flow of drugs will continue to grow because we do not concentrate on the solution to the problem all the American government ends up doing is adding to the problem using tools of might. Which I know for a fact never works! I look at the human race like a small child whenever you take something away from it the child cries and begs and throws a tantrum until it gets its way. The same can be said about drugs, you try and take them away and society will rebel and have a fit till we get our way! “I see what you’re saying, but I don’t know if I entirely agree with you.” I said continually smelling the enriching smell of the marijuana. “If all drugs were purchasable over the counter do you think you are going to turn into a crackhead?” asked God quaintly. “No!” I said affirmatively! “I don’t believe drugs are bad as long as they are used in moderate amounts that is the key. As long as they are not completely engrained into your life style becoming codependent upon them you can live a happy life!” “I think I understand. What your trying to say is that we cannot and should be not told what we can and cannot do to our bodies, it is our choice.” I said profoundly! “Exactly!” said God exuberantly! “There is hope for this species yet!” Exclaimed Bob! I could not resist any longer, “Is it OK if I smoke some of your pot?” I asked delicately. He handed me his no-named cigarette and I began to embellish on the seeds of Mother Nature! God continued you to speak as I embellished myself with his hospitality, “Look at it like this, some people become so addicted to crack that they would rob and maim their own mother to purchase a sack of rock cocaine, but have you ever heard of someone stealing there mother’s T.V. to sell on the black market to make a few dollars and run down to the liquor store to bye a twelve pack of beer?” “Well, No, but crack is, I’m sure a lot more addicting than beer!” I affirmed. “Let’s take for example powdered cocaine, if the government regulated the sale of cocaine then the potency of the drug could be reduced tremendously. The amount of alcohol in beer is roughly five percent, where as cocaine’s potency is roughly anywhere from fifty to sixty percent. Now if cocaine’s potency were about five percent it would not be as addicting as it already is and would be nowhere near as harmful as it currently is. Some of the more severe dangers from illegal drugs come from the actual distribution of the drug on the street. Without the Government being able to keep a protecting eye on illegal drugs because they are not state or federal regulated some of the business deals are underhanded leading to possible death or dismemberment! If you could buy crack over the counter in a clean safe environment and pay a cheaper price does that not sound like a grand idea?” What buying crack!” I said sarcastically while inhaling deep drags from the marijuana cigarette. “No silly, the idea of removing the danger from actually purchasing the drug and the government could only benefit through regulation and taxing the sale of the drug, just as they do cigarettes and liquor!” “You have some very valid points, but I do not know if legalizing all drugs is the answer.” I said. “It will eventually happen regardless of what anyone says right now. In the next five to ten years medicinal Marijuana will become legal throughout the US and soon there after the push will be made to sell Marijuana just as tobacco products are distributed today! And eventually the rest will follow.”
Arriving at the parking lot of the casino, I realized how much of a wonderful a day it truly was! “Now you’re starting to think the right way!” said Bob. “You must look at every day you wake up and see the sun as a miracle you have been granted bye me. If you are gracious for having another day to live and be productive and love the people around you. You will lead a great life!” “If I could this happy every day about life, I truly would live a grand life!” I told him with agreeance. “To feel this way every day all you have to do is choose to be happy. I mean you must truly decide when you wake up in the morning whether or not you are going to have a good day!” “That sounds to simple to be true!” I remarked. “But it is just as simple as that! The hard part sometimes is getting your bodies decision to coincide with that of the mind.” “Hmnph,” I laughed somewhat to myself! “I can see the irony in the situation.” I told him. As we walked along in the parking lot God seemed to be curious and at the same time excited at every small intricacy around him. He seemed to be fascinated with cracks in the concrete. If we walked past a car that caught Bob’s eye we had to stop and look at it and give me a run down on the model, make, year, size of the motor, and any special features that made the vehicle unique. “I can’t help it, I just love vehicles of transportation! One day well have a form of transportation that will allow us to move from star system to star system in a matter of seconds! Think of how far we have come being that our first mode of transportation was a horse and wagon. It is amazing to me the things our mind can create!” As we walked through the parking lot Bob stopped to look at an 85 Chevy Camaro Iroc-Z, 95 Impala SS, 98 Mitsubishi 3,000 GT. Bob seemed to be Giddy as a small; schoolgirl would be upon receiving a new pony when he looked at each car. ‘”Yes it is amazing how for we have come on our quest for transportation” I said to Bob as we just happened to come upon what I consider to be my dream car! A 2000 Shelby Series one it looked as though it was a silver cat crouched on his haunches ready to pounce! The car appeared to be breathing almost if it had a life of its own. The reminded me of a cross between a Corvette and a Dodge Viper. “I bet this car purrs like a kitty cat.” I told Bob with a huge grin on my face. “Oh yeah, and pounces like a cheetah. This car is definitely in my top ten.” Replied Bob. Look inside here. The interior of this bad boy is customed by the factory. Even the rear view mirror has leather on it! This is a bad motor-scooter.” “I know it is!” The targa, hard top on the Shelby had been removed probably put in the trunk according to factory specifications. Bob didn’t bother to open the door he hopped over the door and into the front seat to check it out. “Who ever owns this car is pretty foolish for leaving his top off this car, I would be afraid someone would either damage it because of some sort of jealousy or steal it for a quick chunk of money. If you had bad intentions you could steal that car right now if you wanted to and had the know how. It would take me at least five years of saving all my money and not paying my bills to buy this car! This guy probably makes enough money in a month to buy and sell me because for someone who just barely gets buy every month I would treat this car as if it was gold! Sitting in the drivers chair Bob inspected the interior closely. All of a sudden a sour look came over God’s face, “I know the man that drives this car, he’s somewhat of a fool and cannot be trusted.” Bob quickly pulled the upper half of his body from the interior of the Shelby and hopped out. His demeanor changing from reprehensive to cheerful once again outside the vehicle and said, “Let’s go inside shall we and see what we can stir up!” “Ok”, I replied without hesitation. As we walked away, I turned and glanced to see what God was looking at on the front of the Shelby. The only odd thing I noticed was that the license plate said 666. “Curious”, I thought as we walked up the stairs, Bob ahead of me by about ten steps whistling his favorite tune.
Upon crossing the threshold of the casino, Bob smiled smirking, “ Well, it looks as though they gift wrapped Las Vegas and sent it here and opened it up inside this building!” “It is pretty cool, I really do feel very festive every time I come here because it looks like there is a party awaiting around every corner.” “Oh my.” Said Bob. “I could become very addicted to a place like this, I mean look at the hub-bub of people about, every one is gambling, drinking, enjoying themselves. Some one with an addictive personality, especially someone like me could really get caught up in this sort of atmosphere!” “ It can become very addicting; they build it to be that way.” “They would not make as much money if they did not.” I replied to Bob. “You do have a valid point.” Bob said. “Look!” I said. “This place doesn’t have any windows there are not any clocks on the wall and the one thing that really makes you feel like your geared toward spending your money is the fact that the ceiling is painted to resemble the sky! You really don’t know if it is day or night. You could let all your cares slip away in this controlled environment.” All of a sudden Bob noticed sitting in the main entrance to the casino was an antique rail car that used to be used to carry passengers from city to city. “ Righteous brother!” said Bob with a sparkle in his eyes. “What do you say to grabbing a couple of martinis and having a seat inside the rail car?” “Alright, what’s your poison?” I replied to Bob even though it sounded somewhat boring seeing as how I had sat in the rail car hundreds of times already but, it was Bob’s first time in a long time. “ Rum and Coke.” answered Bob. I went to the bar, while Bob headed towards the rail car to inspect it and find us a couple of seats.
It made me want to laugh out loud watching Bob inspect the rail car, while I waited in line to get drinks. God walked around the rail car twice looking at every little nook and cranny on the outside of the car before walking inside and finding seats. I bought a rum and coke for God and vodka and cranberry juice for myself. Once I arrived at the front of rail car I climbed up the small rod-iron steel stairs leading to the front door of the rail car. The rail car was covered in beautifully polished copper and bronzed metals. Walking inside Beautifully plush red and blue pastels made you feel curiously comfortable and right at home. Finding God, I sat down and handed him his drink. Our seats sat next to a window that gave us an entire view of the main bar. We had the perfect angle to sit and watch every one who sat at the bar and ordered drinks and conversated. Bringing the cup to his lips Bob tilted the cup and took a long soothing gulp. “Mmmnnghh, man that’s good, I haven’t had an alcoholic beverage in two years!” said Bob. “ Really.” I said shockingly. “Yeah, I drink to much and I lose control of my thought process and make very stupid decisions.” “Really.” Which was the only thing I could think to say because the thought of God losing control of his thought process was a scary idea. “Two drinks is my limit any more than that and I start to get loopy, you know what I’m saying brother!” said Bob while shooting me a cackling smile. “I think my next drink will have to be something I haven’t tried yet because it is always good to try something new.” “If that’s your choice then so be it!” I told Bob.
Gingerly I took a small sip from my rum and coke and began to gaze out the window at the people surrounding the bar. “ Look at that women over there.” Said Bob pointing his finger. My first glance caused me wince away from her repulsive looks. “ She is a sad sight isn’t she?” said Bob sadly. The woman stood about five feet two inches and was very husky. She had a large potbelly holding up her sagging bosoms. Her hair appeared dirty and oily and her clothes needed to be changed because they looked so dirty. Her looks and appearance were not necessarily what made her repulsive it was her demeanor. Her shoulders were clinched forward and her chest was sunken. She had a constant scowl about her. Her eyebrows bunched up above her eyes causing the rest of her forehead to ripple. If you looked closely you could see that her hands were constantly clenched in a fist. She looked as though threatening her life with a handgun would not get her to smile. She strutted around the bar like a pissed off jungle cat ready to pounce on anyone who approached her, which is the reason that made her so repulsive. “She’s not very attractive.” I agreed with him. “She has led a sad and somewhat wasted life. She does lead somewhat of a productive life. She works for a nationally known newspaper during the night.” “What does she do for this newspaper?” I asked curiously. “She works in the circulation department.” Replied Bob. “Oh, so she is a paperboy.” “Well basically, but her job entails a lot more than just throwing papers. She is responsible for thousands of people receiving the paper every week. This is the one thing she contributes to society that she is extra-ordinarily good.” Said Bob with some hope for the world in his voice. “ Well everyone has to be good at something.” I said sheepishly. “Well it’s for darn sure she is never going to get a job as stripper!” “Now, Now, we don’t wanna poke fun to much, she is not that bad of a person.” Said Bob. “ C’mon Bob look at her she looks like a troll just took a crap!” God burst out loud laughing, “ Ooooh, Oh my that’s my funny, but, Oh my shit, that love has really got me stoned. Oh man, but, she may not be the most prettiest of creatures or the most intelligent.” Bob took a long swallow from his Rum and Coke, “For the kind of lifestyle she has been brought up in it is a real surprise to see her do as well as she is doing now.” “Really!” I said. “When she was young.” Bob continued. “Well, if I remember right, she was about five or six when her father began molesting her. He was a dirty, dirty man. He was a back hills, country bumpkin, redneck, cracker, dirty piece of filth on the underside of my barefoot, well I had better quit with the adjectives before I say something I am going to regret. Any way, her father used to do dirty, bad things to her such as if she cried when he forced himself upon his small child he would make her sleep with dirty, muddy pigs. The man was a pig farmer. For a small child this could infect a child with a virus but, one of the pigs were always contemplating trampling the poor girl to death. On the other hand sometimes if she didn’t cry he would spank her buttocks to make her cry until she was bloody raw. So I think she turned out to be pretty good!” “ Your shitting me!” gasping at the thought! “Oh, and I forgot to mention once her oldest brother turned sixteen he began having sex with her too. Because bye this time it was standard practice, all her brothers new what daddy did and they just fallowed in his footsteps. She fathered her first child when she was twelve years old, which died when it was about three months old. She walks around putting up of a front of being pissed of because she afraid some else is going to violate her personally privacy again. Who she is really pissed off at is her father mainly and of course her brothers for violating her personal sanctity.
God took another sip from his cocktail and grinned and reached into his shirt pocket and removed two cigars, “Would you care for a Macanuedo.” “You know.” I replied to Bob, “I haven’t had a cigar in years and it does sound good!” Bob handed me one and pulled a lighter from his left jeans pocket, “Never leave home without fire.” Said Bob. “ You know it has been about two years for me.” I added. “I never buy these kind of things because I am not going to pay for something that could destroy my health.” “Understandable.” I replied as I stuck that fat cigar between my lips and struck the lighter. As I began to puff on the cigar it began to enrich my taste buds with the savory flavor of nicotine. ‘Damn this tastes good!’ I thought to myself. “Heaven on earth isn’t it?” asked Bob trying to hide his smirk. The rush from the nicotine sang to my soul giving me a feeling power, “Just like the good’ole days.” I spoke aloud. “ Oh exactly, I know what you mean brother this is a fine tasting cigar. The person that gave me these did have fine taste!” Bob said while he began to puff away on his cigar to get it started while nodding his head up-and-down in utter agreeance with me. Peering out the window of the rail car I noticed an extremely obese woman walking around the bar. She wore a tight tank top style shirt with a brown and black flannel shirt over it. Her pants were of a cheap cotton material that had stirrups at the bottom to keep the pants from riding up, which hung loosely over her sandal slash flip-flop style shoes. Unwashed dirty blonde hair hung down to the center of her back the last six inches were fluffed with split ends. Layers of cellulite swayed over her elbows and her knees. You could tell from a casual glance she had a hard time just being able to move around. Watching her lumber around the bar caused me to giggle loudly on the inside but all I could muster was a smirk on my face. I did not want to be rude and laugh out loud for fear of hurting someone’s feelings. “Yeah she is pretty hefty, but she’s not the one you should really be laughing at. That guy sitting at the bar over their with the black tight fitting stocking cap.” Said Bob with a shit-eaten grin on his face. I looked over the crowd of people and noticed a few different men wearing the same style of cap. Bob then went on to describe him further, “It is the gentleman wearing a blue jean jacket with matching pants and a pair of tan alligator cowboy boots. He has a goatee’ and a moustache with big bright eyes somewhat of a handsome man. His facial features are very cut and his beard looks very exact and well groomed.” “Yeah the black guy, I know which one you’re talking about.” I replied. “Well yeah he is the black guy, but you shouldn’t describe somebody by their skin color. That is how racism begins.” I looked at God with a certain amount of disagreement, “What are you talking about?” I asked. “You must truly become color blind in every aspect of the human race. You should try looking at everyone you come across or meet as a mind not a person. Never judge them by their own ignorance’s because they are ignorant to there own ignorance’s. When you begin to look at people and only recognize their individual minds you begin to change the way you think and then you start to deal with people a lot better. Try to describe someone with their personality traits or by what their wearing for starters is really a good place to start changing the way you think.” Bob replied. “OK” I said thinking Bob was somewhat full of himself. “Any way the guy at the bar that I was referring too is a poor, poor soul.” said Bob with a bit of sorrow in his voice, but as soon as he said it a smile cracked on his face and he shook his head whimsically. “What’s wrong with that guy?” I asked curiously. “You ask that so curiously is it because is it because he is pretty normal good looking guy?” “Yeah he just looks like the regular Guy just trying to make a living in a crazy mixed up world.” I replied. “It’s funny that you describe him as the regular Guy because his actual name is Guy!” “You’re shitting me!” I said. “No huh-uh!” Bob said with some swagger in his demeanor. “Guy has the potential to be a great man and that could be very well respected in the business community and socially. He could live the life of a king among kings, but chooses to piss it all away. Guy has come to be a career alcoholic and blames his plight in life on everyone and every thing around him. He never stops to question his own actions and when he does he buries himself in self-pities and an alcoholic utopia wonderland. Where he is king of his altered reality and he feels powerful.” “So he is really just a big-time drunk.” I added. “Yeah, but the thing that irritates me is how he tries to put on a front of being so intelligent and worldly when really he is the opposite and lives in a world of self-sorrow. He suckers people into being his friend and then he ends up hurting them when they really get to know each through actions. His self-esteem has always been so low that he could never perceive himself as being a well to do man and therefore never became one.” I looked at God and smirked, “Where and the hell did you learn how to do that?” “I have the ability to know everyone at the same time.” “I don’t understand what you’re saying.” “Well one day you will.” Bob said grinning brightly. God took the last swallow from his Rum and Coke and said, “Is it time to go gamble yet brother?” I grabbed my drink and stood up and said, “Let’s do it!”
We headed towards the center of the casino were the main entrance of the game room. The entrance was roped off and been coerced to form aisle’s to ensure single file lines into the game room. “Do you have an idée with you Bob?” I asked curiously. “Sure do” Bob replied as he reached into his back right pocket. Curiously, I wondered to myself what would God’s last name would be? “You’ll find out when you’re dead.” I heard Bob say under his voice humorously. As we approached the gate we both flashed our idée’s. The gate keeper barely glanced at my badge as if he new me by my face, but when Bob stepped through the gate he was motioned over to the side for further inspection to ensure the safety of the people and the casino as well. Bob quietly stepped over to the side and stood there with a blank look on his face and a huge grin. I thought what Kodak moment; God being inspected by casino security cops. Upon closer inspection of Bob’s idée and his face they quickly came to the conclusion that he was harmless and let him continue.
Walking into the game room bells and whistles came at us from every direction. “Woooe this is too cool! Said Bob vibrantly. “I cannot believe the architecture here; little angel and gremlin statues coming out of the wall. Decorative stone pillars, which were mainly put their for aesthetic purposes, and slot machines where organized fashionably everywhere. The carpet was blue neon mixed with yellow and black futuristic designs all throughout the carpet. As we walked along the carpet-changed color creating more decorative designs as we went along. The buzz’s, the bell’s, the ringing the laughing people about us in a happy mood, calling to us, asking us to dance. The environment pumped you up and made feel excited as if good things were about to come our way. “It’s funny?” “What’s that?” I asked God. “Look around here, always look around your environment. The architecture gives away the true meaning of this place.” “What are you talking about” I asked. “Well look at the walls. The first thing I noticed about this place that really caught my eye was the angel and the demon statues protruding from the walls. To me that means that this place can either be a very good place or a very bad place depending on whether you have an addictive personality or not.” “Well I never really looked a whole lot at the architecture, I just came in to gamble, and any way I have been in this casino so damn many times it is like as second home to me.” I told Bob. “Yeah I remember there for a while you going to the boat to try and win money to pay your bills. That’s not a real good place to be.” “You’re right; I don’t near as often as I used too! I keep my expenditures to a minimum.” I told God. “I’ve been watching and you have been doing a lot better, but you have a slip every now and again. “Yeah I finally paid off the sixteen payday loans. I can’t believe that I was caught up in all those stupid payday loans. You know them people are just legal loan sharks. A hundred dollars every couple of weeks really adds up and you know they were charging me twenty two percent interest. They really stuck it to me.” “Yeah I agree they do take advantage of people but, unfortunately if there wasn’t a desire for them then they would not be their.” said Bob. “Yeah unfortunately your right.” I said agreeing with Bob. Heading towards the change counter I asked Bob, “Being that you are Bob why do you not just get rid of people who prey on helpless people in our society?” “I gave everyone the gift of free will and these people that let themselves get caught up in a lifestyle of constantly racking up debt are ignorant to their own downfalls. They are caught up in a procrastinative attitude thinking why pay today when I can come back tomorrow and make it up again later. Standing in line at the change counter I noticed the woman standing in front of us with an extremely brightly colored dress. It is an outfit that definitely drew attention. I chuckled under my breath upon the sight of her. Before Bob answered my question he broke eye contact with me and turned towards the woman with the bright yellow dress on. The woman looked to be about four and half feet tall. She probably weighed about one hundred fifty pounds. Her dress hugged her thick body and her long brown hair stuck to the small of her back from static-cling. Coarsely starched ruffles illuminated from the waste and the shoulders of the dress. She did not have on any panty hose and you could see her visibly unshaven legs it looked as though she had thick hairy man legs. You could definitely tell the dress was homemade simply bye the fact that she had imitation plastic rhinestones organized into intricate patterns all over the dress. Bright yellow high heal shoes allowed her to stand about three inches taller. She had a huge yellow sun-hat on that spread the width of her shoulders covered with small plastic white flowers. This woman’s persona reminded me of a tacky lawn ornament.
“Hello Charlotte, I love your dress is that new?” Bob asked the lady in the yellow dress. “Well I’ll be!” the woman in the yellow dress said with a long southern draw. She turned around to face God, “I thought that was you Bob, oh my goodness it is sooo good to see! I was actually just thinking of you!” “Really what a coincidence it just goes to show you what the ‘power of the mind’ is capable of.” The woman in the yellow dress threw her arms around Bob giving her a tiny-big bear hug causing her ruffles to scrunch and make scratching noises. “Are you still on your travels Bob?” “Of course I am always rambling you know that.” God turned to me and put his hand on my shoulder and said, “This is my good friend Steve. Steve this is Charlotte.” While shaking Charlotte’s hand I realized I had never shaken Bob’s hand and introduced myself to him. “Good to meet you Steve” said Charlotte grinning like only a southern bell should. She did somewhat remind me of the shape of a bell because of the ruffles on her dress flared outwards resembling somewhat of the shape of a bell. “Like wise.” I told her. “Are you visiting here from Texas?” asked Bob. “I sure am I have family here in town that I am staying with. You know Bob it is so good to see you. You do get around don’t you?” asked the woman in the yellow dress. “Well I try my damndest to make my rounds!” replied God. Charlotte belted out a deep cackling laugh, “Well you sure do!” “Ma’am how can I help you?” asked the man behind the counter. Charlotte nor Bob seemed to hear the cashier. They were off in there own little world catching up on people and current events. “Ma’am what can I help you with?” asked the cashier once again. “Oh, me?” she said smirking. “I would like seven hundred dollars worth of dollar coins please” she told the cashier. “ She is a wonderful woman and deserved to be saved.” God leaned and whispered in my ear. Charlotte received her coins from the cashier and turned around and said to Bob, “Well listen Bob I will give my phone number and you can come and meet my family I am sure that they wouldn’t mind you staying with us.” Said charlotte as she reached into her purse and pulled out a business card and a pen and wrote down a phone number on it and handed it to Bob. “Thank you I just might look you up it only depends on where the currents take me.” Replied Bob. “Great!” she gave God a hug and he hugged her back ten fold and Charlotte was on her way. Before the cashier could ask, “I would like twenty dollars in dollars.” Asked Bob. I followed asking for eighty dollars in dollars and we were off to the slots.
“Hey, Steve the progressive machines in the center of the game room pays out the highest for the smallest bet?” Bob asked me. “Yeah and it is also taxes paid.” I replied. “Great, that’s where I will be.” And Bob zoomed off leaving end trails. I took my eighty dollars and went to the blazing seven’s dollar machine. This is the machine that I have the best luck on. I put twenty dollars in my favorite machine and after about twenty minutes I had pretty much broken even with my first twenty dollars. I was very curious though to know Bob’s current status. I walked towards the center of the game room to find Bob to catch a glimpse of God playing a slot machine. As I approached Bob I could tell he was on his last three credits. Once I came upon Bob he immediately turned to face me and said, “I am glad you are here because I need to borrow some money?” “Sure, how much?” I replied not wanting to tell God no and also being somewhat thrown bye him feeling my presence as I came upon him from behind. I handed Bob forty-one dollar coins, “Thank you brother you will not regret it, look at it as a good investment!” “No problem.” I told Bob. I headed towards the cashier booth in order for me to get another forty dollars worth of dollar coins. Once I arrived at the booth I handed the man my checking account debit card, “Hey chief can I get forty dollars worth of dollars?” I asked the cashier feeling grateful for not having to wait in line. Once I received my coins I headed over towards the eye of the tiger slot machines and proceeded to waste my money. After about twenty minutes I started to become very frustrated, “Augh damnit!” I said under my breath I was not getting a single bite out of the machines. The forty dollars that I had just removed from my checking account was about to completely flushed down the funnel. I had dropped thirty of the forty in fifteen-minutes. I quickly decided to try another machine.
Walking around somewhat aimlessly trying to get a good vibration from one of the machines my mind kept wondering towards what Bob was doing. Suddenly, I noticed the woman in the yellow dress and the large sunhat (how could you not she stuck out like the piercing light at the end of a very tunnel)! Charlotte seemed to be doing pretty well she had an eight hundred dollar credit on her machine and a cup full of coins. The bells and whistle’s filled the air! Laughter and glee echoed throughout the room creating a festive environment It seemed as though everyone was winning but me and as soon as that thought fleeted through my thought process, I felt a tap in my shoulder, “ Hey brother can I borrow another thirty or forty dollars!” Somewhat startled I quickly turned to face Bob, “Sure!” I said handing God my cup. “But this is the last of the money I can give you because I really cannot afford no more.” “Don’t worry my brother it will come back to you ten-fold!” said God vehemently. I decided to watch Bob play the slots with the rest of my money. Bob headed straight towards my favorite machine. “Blazing seven’s awaits us!” Bob spoke aloud. Arriving at the machine Bob started plunking coins into the machine, “You are mine this time, baby!” Standing next to God watching him gamble I noticed he seemed to be very excited. The less the machined paid out the more excited Bob became. He almost seemed to be somewhat angry at the same time probably frustrated from the machine not paying out. Bob finally got down to his last fifteen dollars and he began to become very excited, so excited that he began to make noises under his breath and his eyes seemed to almost bulge from their sockets. The more money that slid down into the machine the more fidgety Bob became it appeared as though he was about ready to fall to the floor and have a spasmic fit! Strange noises erupted from his mouth beads of sweat began to roll off of his chin. Down to his last three dollars his clothes drenched in sweat God dropped in the last three coins pulled the lever and threw his hands in the air with a fit of passionate rage. It appeared as though we were the only two people in the casino in those few short seconds. Gusts of wind flew upon us trying to yank the clothes from our backs, Bob’s shirt whipped around attempting to fly Bob away in its talon’s. The gusts of wind appeared only to effect us two and the amazing part is that nobody else seemed to notice all the ruckus we were causing. At this split moment I believe we were invisible to the world. The air swirling about us, Bob’s hands were stretched out towards the heavens, gritting his teeth with a crazy glare in his bugged out eyes, God began to scream, “WWWWHHhhooooooouuuuuuuuuuuooOOOOOOOOOOO!” Bit’s of spittle flew from Bob’s mouth as he belted out a scream aimed towards the heavens! As he bellowed the machine’s dials spun frantically. The numbers were moving at an incredible amount of speed. Smoke began to emit from the machine and you could here the gears grinding and piercing each other. Just as it seemed the machine could take no more of Bob’s will the dials on the machine stopped on three blazing red sevens! The largest jackpot the machine paid out! Whistle’s and bells rang piercing my ear drum as me and Bob jumped in the screaming and whooping giving each other high fives! Dollar coins erupted from the machine resembling volcanic explosion the size of mount St. Helens! Reaching for every cup we could find we both frantically tried catching each individual coin that spewed from the slot machine! Reality seemed to kick back in to play and everyone around noticed us and began to congratulate us and give us high fives! “Whooeeeww, that was awesome!” “I agree, I have never seen anyone hit that large of a jackpot, Holy Jesus, fourteen grand!” I said to God exuberantly! I was excited enough for the both of us it was almost as though I had won the money myself! “I apologize for you to have to see somewhat of an angry side of me, but he has such a strong hold on this place I had to concentrate on the divine rather intensely for a couple of seconds in order for me to break his hold.” “Him who?” I asked. “You know the one you refer to as the devil.” “I’m sorry but, I don’t understand?” “Don’t worry, you will come quickly now we must cash this in and go to the table’s!”
Walking briskly throughout the machines people seemed to pay no mind to Bob and I as we journeyed towards the change counter. As if we were a ghost walking amongst a crowd of people unseen, Bob began to place the palm of his hand upon every machine we past by. Each machine he touched instantly hit a jackpot! Bells and whistle’s sounded all around us. The noise almost became deafening, people yelling and screaming and whooping it up all around us. The excitement created a positive energy flow that seemed to transfuse throughout the crowded casino. Looking upon God with great respect for making so many people happy, I noticed Bob having an intense smile on his face never breaking his concentration. After arriving at the change counter Bob turned to me, “Awesome isn’t it.” “Yes it is!” I replied with great respect and awe of witnessing an unexplainable miracle!
After cashing in God's winning's we started to walk back towards another area of the game room, "I want to pay back the money that I borrowed from you." Said Bob. "Great, I was hoping you were going to say that! Because I am kinda broke and every little bit counts. I am just glad you were able to win some money, if I were to have gambled that money I probably would have lost all of it! So really I am glad it was in your hands." Bob handed me five hundred dollars of his winning's, "Will this be enough?" asked Bob. "Oh, hell yeah!” I said excited with the fact that God was sharing his winning's with me. Bob was giving me more than twice of what I leant to him. "Better yet here is another five hundred." "No I couldn't take your money." "Listen take it, I am going to end up giving most of it away any way! I am only going to keep what I need to survive on." "Aren't you a martyr!" I said to God smirkingly. He looked at me and smiled showing his proud white teeth to me once more. "Well it was free money to me and it is better served in the hands of the needy. Anyway what I am I going to do with it go put a down payment on a new car or go and buy a new wardrobe or diamond rings. I have much more important things to worry about than material possessions!" "I understand." I said to Bob somewhat in awe by his comments.
Finally stopping at the corner of the game room we had arrived. "Auuugh the tables!" exclaimed Bob. "You really wanna play the tables?" I asked squeamishly for the fact that God had a lot of money already and still Bob wanted to gamble more! "This isn't gambling no more Steve!" Bob told me. "The hands of fate have lead us here today for a specific reason which had ultimately revealed itself to me just now!" "I do not follow you at all Bob. What are you talking about?" I asked curiously. "You asked me the same question a few minutes earlier and now I shall answer you." "My ears are wide open!" I told God. "Do you see the man at the center card table with the black three piece suit and jet black hair slicked strait back." As soon as I glanced at the man his head arose from the game and smiled a devilishly grin, "Well hello Bob, funny seeing you here!" shouted the man from across the table. The embodiment of pure negative energy sat smugly grinning from ear to ear showing us his one glimmering gold tooth. All of his fingers were covered with large diamonds encased in shimmering gold rings. Gold tennace bracelets wrapped perfectly around his perfect white cuffs. A thin, short mustache grew from his upper lip and groomed itself about three quarters of an inch below his lips. His goatee was about half an inch in width and stretched from the bottom lip down to the end of his chin. The end of his goatee was what made him appear somewhat different from your average three-piece suit wearing man. All of his facial hair was neatly trimmed at about an eight of an inch but, the small tuft of hair at the end of his chin had grown out to about two and half or three inches. He also had bright blue eyes just as Bob did and for some reason he had a demeanor that stood out amongst all the other patrons. Not just by the clothes he wore or all his flashy jewelry, but some sort of weird feeling you felt just by being in his presence. If you were a man for some strange reason you wanted to be his best friend or if you were a woman she might throw away her whole family life for one torrent night of pleasures pertaining to the flesh. “Hey partner, fancy seeing you here” God said to the Devil. Bob turned towards me and handed me a twenty and asked, “Can you go and get two Rum and Coke’s, make sure the rum is Captain Morgan spiced rum and get whatever you want!” “No problem.” I replied. I rushed away quickly towards the liquor counter, I did not want to miss a second of this!
After purchasing the beverages I walked briskly back towards the tables careful not to spill a single drop. Once I got back to the tables I witnessed the strangest thing or so at least I thought it was strange. There was God and the Devil chit-chatting away as if they were long lost friends who hadn’t seen each other for years. I also noticed that the Devil had four empty glasses and his face seemed to be a bit glazed over giving him the appearance of being extremely intoxicated. As I neared God and the devil, “I come bearing gifts!” I said to them. The devil looked at me with awe and a warm smile, “You can be my friend anytime.” The devil laughed sheepishly! “Rob this is my good friend Steve, Steve this is Robert.” God said to me introducing me to the devil. “Please call me Rob. Hey, bye the way got any gota’” Every one at the table cackled a sly laugh. Two blonde and a brunette woman who where very attractive seemed to hang on Robert’s every word. “I am sorry I don’t understand what you are asking me?” I asked Robert. “He asked you if you have any cocaine” God told me. “Yeah I have been sitting here for twenty two hours straight, haven’t been able to go to the bathroom, the cocktail waitress began to ignore me after my thirty third drink, my ass is achin from sitting on this uncomfortable chair which was provided to me after I stood for sixteen hours. But, I have been winning a shit-load of money so I really can’t complain.” The devil explained to me.
Bob turned to me with a devilish grin pulling twenty dollars out of his pocket, “Can you go and bring us back some Rum and Coke’s, Please?” Knowing that the devil already, obviously had too much to drink as it was, I agreed, “Sure!”, I replied without question. Rob focused his attention on me, “You are a God-sent!” said the Devil profusely trying madly not to slur his words. Quickly, without hesitation, I headed towards the liquor counter pondering just what it was that Bob had up his sleeve. Here I was serving liquor to a cataclysmic event between the powers that be. ‘This is somewhat ludicrous I thought’, I am getting God and the Devil all liquored up in order to brawl for the control of the universe. What exactly is going to happen here tonight? Is my life in danger, are the people around me in danger, "Hum!” I thought out loud, ‘These people have no idea as to what is gong on and here I have a front row seat and the responsibility to serve refreshments to the teammate’s.’ The idea of the whole situation sounded a bit preposterous and somewhat ironic and weird all at the same time.
Racing back towards the card tables’ not wanting to miss a single second of the action, I noticed God and the Devil were sitting across from each other staring intently at each other. They were playing twenty-one and each of them had what looked to be about fifteen hundred dollars a piece placed on this particular hand. Without so much as even a glance at his cards the Devil asked for another card. God did not even bat an eyelash and said, “Stay.” Continuing the showdown of stares. The other people at the table did not seem to notice what was going on although there was probably more money being gambled in one hand than what they were used too. After the dealer made his rounds giving out the proper amount of cards he motioned to Rob again to see if he wanted another card. “Hit me and raise another thousand!” said the Devil standing his ground maintaining eye contact with God.
All at once everyone dropped out of the game proclaiming that it was too rich for their blood leaving the God and the Devil standing alone. The scenario reminded me of an old western movie where the good guy wore a white outfit and the bad guy was dressed in black and they were standing in front of the old saloon at high noon counting out ten paces towards a showdown. While pondering my thoughts and witnessing an event that would forever be plastered into my memory, I remembered, “Drinks!”, I said aloud. Setting Rob’s drink down in front of him and quickly moving to the other side of the table to give Bob his drink. Upon realizing the drink had been placed before him the Devil lost his concentration and snatched up the alcoholic beverage and swallowed it quickly trying desperately to remain focused. “Call.” Spoke the dealer with little emotion.
Flipping his cards over, “Augh Shit!” proclaimed the Devil realizing he had busted going over twenty-one. Still without breaking his fixated stare on the Devil Bob turned his cards face up revealing he had exactly twenty-one. “Mother-Fucker!” said Rob shaking his fist profusely. “Sir, please try to take in consideration the other gamblers.” Said the dealer. “Fuck-Off!” said Rob trying to prove his dominance over the dealer. God eased back in his chair smiling smugly and took a sip from his cocktail, Looks like your winning streak is over with!” The Devil gave God a look of disgust and a bit of put-up or shut-up attitude gleaming from his brow.
The Devil turned to me, “I need another drink, could you bring me another drink? I could use another drink.” Said the Devil slurring his words. Still maintaining friendly behavior towards me, Rob’s demeanor changed significantly. Focused savagery betook The Devil. His eyebrows lowered losing his goofy nonchalant smirk. His pupils became focused with great intent. Rob’s mind went from that of a non-chalent no care in the world to the mindset of a wild animal hunting for survival. His breathing seemed also seemed to refocus itself, slowing down his lungs took long slow drags of air. “GET SOME FUCKIN’ DRINKS!” Spoke the Devil with a vigorous tone turning his head towards me showing off his jagged teeth. As if smiling rudely scaring me wildly his gums, which served as home to those dog-like teeth, were rotting away giving him the appearance that he was dying from the inside out.
Hurriedly, I turned and walked towards the direction of the bar. I had no problem going and getting drinks because I almost ran away when Rob bared his evil grin to me. Finally after waiting several minutes in line the bartender motioned to me, “Thirsty aren’t we?” Not really knowing how to respond I started to speak, “Well, I, Uh…” “Well I hope you aren’t bringin drinks to our friend in the dark suit at the card tables. He was cut off a long time ago because he was becoming belligerent with our workers and customers. Grabbing the scantily clad dressed cocktail waitresses behinds and making derogatory statements. We almost kicked him out, but for some reason they allowed him to stay. I do not have the final say on decisions of that nature, but I guess he has some pull with higher-ups.” “Well don’t you worry about a thing, I’m not going to feed him any liquor!” I said lying through my teeth.
After purchasing two Rum and Cokes I raced, back not wanting to miss any part of the main event. As I approached the table, I noticed Bob scooping up a large amount of chips and moving them to his corner. “AUGH SHIT, this guy is counting cards or something! There is no way in hell!” the Devil shouted slurring his words as I set down his drink in front of him. “Thank God!” Rob proclaimed when he noticed he received a drink. Bob sat in his corner smiling smugly, planning his every move, staying ten steps ahead at all times. I noticed as I went to give Bob his drink that he had barely touched his last drink. So I decided to hold onto it and drink it myself. Lord knows I needed one. “Yes you do.” Spouted Bob as the dealer began dealing the cards. Embellishing in my drink, I watched as the Devil and God focused intently on the cards being dealt to them. Besides the dealer, Bob and Rob were the only two people gambling at the table and everyone walking by did not even seem to notice the large amounts of cash and chips lying on the table. Astounded by the notion that no one else seemed to realize the large amounts of money being tossed around on a relatively small table. Although the weird thing I started to notice is everyone walking around seemed to have a glazed over face, but not in a bad way actually in an incredible way! The smile’s plastered on everyone’s faces were astronomical almost as if they were brainwashed into happiness. The positivity exuded from the crowd creating a more exciting and festive atmosphere. Kindness danced through the crowds of passer Byers revealed by the looks in their eyes. The more the positive energy flowed throughout the crowd’s of the casino the more the Devil seemed to lose his composure.
“Augh Fuck!” the devil yelled without consideration for the rest of the patron’s as Bob turned his cards face up revealing a hand of exactly twenty-one! “Sir, if you continue with vulgarities we will have to ask you to leave!” said the dealer vehemently glaring at Rob. I could tell the dealer was becoming frustrated by Rob’s vulgar drunkenness and also not being able to win a single hand. Thousands of dollars were being thrown around on the table and the dealer had not been able to touch a single bit of it. As the next hand was being dealt Bob winked at me. Not realizing what was up his sleeve until the cards were turned face up revealing both Bob and Rob had busted and the dealer dealt himself exactly twenty-one. Smugly, the dealer smirked to himself as if he was thinking, “It is about time I won a hand.” That’s when I realized what Bob had been up to. “This fucking game.” Sighed the Devil in disappointment. “You just can’t win for lose can you Rob!” Bob spouted slyly to the Devil. “Fuck this shit, this is bullshit!” shot the Devil throwing his arms up in frustration. “Having problems?” asked Bob sarcastically.
“What the hell!” said Rob taking the rest of his money out on the table for the next round in a last ditch effort to regain his money and save face. “No pun intended, right Rob?” said Bob giggling to himself. “Nope, what the hell!” spouted the Devil once again in his drunken slur. “Sir, there is a maximum bet of ten thousand dollars sir.” Said the dealer upon realizing that Rob had bet nearly fifty thousand dollars. The Devil turned to the dealer scrunching his lips back to reveal his dog-like teeth. The dealer’s face immediately turned white after witnessing Rob’s snarling grimace filled with jagged ivory. Turning away from the Devil staring straight down at the card table afraid to look up. The dealer began placing ten thousand dollars worth of chips onto the table readying himself for the next bout. Gleaming with a bit of superiority God matched the Devil’s wager with ease since he had won most of Rob’s money. With all of Rob’s money on the table the dealer began to deal the cards.
“This is it!” said Bob jeeringly. “Fuck you!” said the Devil unveiling his full level of intoxication. The dealer now afraid of Rob shyed away from any more warnings against Rob for his behavior and continued to stare straight down at the card table. As the dealer dealt the cards, I could here him silently counting out the cards as he handed them out trying hard not to let his hands shake from extreme nervousness, “one, one, one, two, two, two, three, three, three.” Despite his nervousness the dealer moved as quickly as he could to move the game closer to a finish. Bob turned and winked at me showing me his charismatic smile! “Give me another fuckin’ card.” Said the Devil abhorrently slurring his words. An hour and a half had passed since the Devil and God first started playing, I had made several trips back and forth to the bar, Bob was just starting to finish up his original drink while Rob continued to over indulge himself. The Devil being in a state of total intoxication found himself unable to barely look up at his opponents slurring his words to the point of mistaking him for speaking in tongues. After Rob received his cards the dealer turned to Bob. “Hit me!” said Bob exuberantly! The dealer tossed Bob his card, “Stay!” said Bob with a certain amount of assuredness. After looking at his cards the dealer took two. The Devil began to shake violently. First his hands followed by the rest of his body! Uncontrollable spasms of energy pulsed through Rob as if he were attached to an electrical outlet! Bob sat quietly at his end of the table still grinning smugly controlling his circus as the great ringmaster! Rob shot up from his chair shaking uncontrollably. The veins on his neck protruded and pulsed as if they were a foreign life form trying to escape from his the inside of his neck. While the Devil stood waiting to burst like a water balloon, Bob sat quaintly as a cool current of wind flowed with exact precision over the table causing the cards to stand up and dance around. Appearing to posses a free will of their own the cards danced about floating in the wind.
And in his final moment, Bob’s puckered up his lips and blew into the direction of the oncoming breeze counteracting it. The cards fell face up all of them arranged neatly in front of their prospective players. Astounded by the events that just took place the dealer shouted out, “The winner with the bright white smile!” Bob began gathering up his money, “You piece of shit, I’m gonna, you fuckin!”, cried Rob still shaking viscously. Rob covered his ears and arched his back as if he was about ready to explode! Within a moments time the casino security rushed the area around us hovering around the Devil trying to secure him and subdue him for fear of him causing any more ruckus. No sooner than security was on top of an inebriated Devil, Bob was in the middle of them warding them away from Rob protecting him proclaiming that this was a close friend of his and that his friend was a little tipsy and that he would take care of his friend. Bob quickly pleaded his friends case to the security guards. They complied joyfully without putting up much argument. They seemed happy to release Rob into God’s hands. “Thanks guys I appreciate this, I understand you are only doing your job.” Said Bob as each of the security guard’s shook Bob’s hand and walked away smiling.
With one arm God picked up Rob with one and turned to look at me, “Hey, Steve can you do me a favor and cash in all these chips for me?” “Uh, Sure!” I replied feeling a great sense of responsibility handling God’s money, which was more money than I have ever seen at one time! While Bob picked up the Devil and dusted him off, I hurriedly rushed over to the change counter.
I had been waiting in line for over twenty minutes. I started to get the feeling that they didn’t want to give up that much money especially for a card game. After standing around twiddling my thumbs for what seemed to be forever three different cashiers started to bring out the money in carefully counted miniature bundles. Slowly one cashier counted the money back to me to reassure me that the count was correct, “Quite a day you have had, sir.” The cashier told me with a wince of envy in her eyes. Just as soon as the cashier brought forth the proper paperwork for me to sign for the winning’s Bob came hobbling up to the counter with the Devil propped up against his shoulder. Quickly, Bob scribbled a bunch of gibberish on the paperwork or at least it looked as though it was gibberish maybe, I thought, it was some sort of foreign language that used symbols instead of letters. Without haste Bob reaffirmed his support of the Devil on his shoulder preparing for the long walk back to the truck. I grabbed the money and we ran for the door like we were a few old time gangsters who had just robbed a bank and one of us had been shot and injured.
Galloping through the parking lot I felt as though I were a child leaving the school grounds on the last day of school. Bob slowed to a hault and turned to ask, “Hey, can you do me a favor and grab his car key’s from his left pocket?” “Sure!” was I going to argue with the man? As I reached down into Rob’s pocket God asked me, “Now can you give me your truck key’s so I can put him in your truck and you can pull Rob’s car over to the truck and meet me?” I handed him my keys, “OK, sure, but how do I know which one is Rob’s car?” Mischievously he grinned at me his bright teeth glaring in the bright sunshine, “Do you remember the Shelby series car 2000 we looked at earlier, you know the one you, ‘ooohed’ and ‘auwweeed’ over earlier?” That’s when it hit, “Yeah!” I said as I pulled the car keys from Rob’s pocket. “The car with the license plate that read 666!” I looked down at the metallic key chain, which had the name Karrol Shelby imprinted on it, “I’m on it!” The opportunity to hear the motor start up sent shivers up my spine! Doesn’t really compare to just staring at a picture in a magazine. “I bet you are.” Said Bob. “Leave my car out of this!” said the Devil awakening briefly from his incoherent slur. “Aaa, don’t pay any attention to this drunken fool. Let me worry about him.” said Bob readjusting the Devil on his shoulder to maintain a firm grip on him. “Oh, Don’t worry, I wont pay any attention to him!” while turning to bolt across the parking lot with money in hand.
Finally, breathless, I arrived at the car. The mere sight of it caused my hair to stand on end! The cars hood appeared to rise and expand as if it were breathing. Reminding me of a large jungle predator lying down to take a nap on the warm forest floor. A crisp, clean popping sound arose after I slid the key into the keyhole to unlock this magnificent creation! While tossing the money onto the passenger seat, I slid down into the drivers seat becoming part of the car. The leather seat’s wrapped me up like a woman making love to me. Sliding the key into the ignition, I pushed in the clutch and turned the key! The motor roared as it turned over effortlessly. The motor was quieter than what I expected. Even though the motor was idling I could barely feel the vibration of it, ‘a silent cat on the prowl’ I imagined to myself. The interior reminded me of a rocket ship giving me the feeling that I was about to embark on a grand adventure. After checking to make sure the emergency brake was disengaged, I pushed in the clutch and eased the transmission into first gear. Slowly and with caution, I began to let out the clutch and give the motor some gas. Chachink, the motor cut out and died, “I killed it, I can’t believe, I killed it!” I said aloud mocking myself. Pushing in the clutch again the car turned over once more with reassurance. Easing of the clutch I pushed down on the gas pedal. The power shocked me! I shot forward with quickness; I have never felt in car before! Somewhat nervously, I pressed down on the clutch and took the car out of first gear and stomped on the breaks. I shot forward so quickly that I had come uncomfortably close to another vehicle in front of me. I backed the jungle cat up a bit, pressed in the clutch and slid the transmission back into first gear and took a deep relaxing breath of the hot summer air.
Letting of clutch giving the motor the proper amount of gas the car rapidly propelled forward with enough horses under the hood to fill hundreds of acres of pasture. Instantly and without effort I was doing forty-seven miles per hour while applying a very small amount of pressure onto the accelerator. I didn’t want to drive the car fast, but it appeared that I had no choice! In the attempt to make a right hand turn, I began by removing my right foot from the gas pedal and placing it down on the break while simultaneously pressing down the clutch and up shifting to second gear as I would with my truck. While turning the wheel to the right I began to let out the clutch and give the motor more gas. The car didn’t like that by responding with a low grumbling and a strange vibration throughout the entirety of the car. The sound reminded me of when I did not up shift at the proper speed with my truck. Quickly, I downshifted and gave it some gas. The motor hummed loudly causing me to check the odometer, which read fifty-two! The motor begged for more gasoline the way a person addicted to nicotine craves a cigarette. On the fly thinking told-me to satisfy the beasts craving, but the angel on my shoulder told me to shy away from such exuberance’s. Knowing I had three quarters of a parking lot to drive the tires squealed as I fed the beast what is so desired! As quickly as it came time up shift to second, I began slowing down because I was near Bob’s side of the parking lot. Pressing down firmly on the brake. The needle on the speed odometer dropped from one hundred ten down to seventeen at the drop of a hat. “Whoa!” I said aloud astounded by feeling the capabilities of a true sports car! Slowly taking a left I pressed down the clutch as to make sure and not kill the motor. After straightening out I placed the shifter into first gear let out the clutch quickly romping on the gas pedal. The instant surge of power plastered my cheeks to the back of the headrest! Just a soon as I gave it the gas, I let off the accelerator pressed down on the clutch and placed transmission into neutral for fear of another facial contortion. I let the vehicle coast innocently till reaching the parking slot my truck was parked in.
Sitting idle listening to the motor gurgle with anticipation, I did not want to get out of the driver’s seat. I noticed Rob had been buckled into the passenger seat of my truck. Hurriedly Bob came over to me and said, “Are we having fun yet!” said Bob gleefully! “This is the greatest day of my life!” I proclaimed! “Well yes it is brother it is all about you today!” “Thanks.” I told God. “This is greatly appreciated.” I thanked him. “I know it is.” God responded. “Now.” God said. “I have a favor to ask of you.” “Shoot!” I said more than willing to please. “Well first things first we need to take care of Mr. Intoxication in the truck. I know of a place to drop him off on our way to our first stop.” “First stop?” I asked
“Ok now listen closely, I want you to drive the Shelby home and.” I quickly cut Bob off, “You consider that a favor?” “Yes, but I am not finished yet.” Bob continued, I shut-up taking his request more seriously. “You are going to make six people very happy today including you.” “OK how am I going to do that?” I asked eagerly. Reaching into his back pocket he removed a business card along with a list of names and addresses. “Split the money six different ways. Keep one-sixth of the money for yourself and deliver the other five parts to these people at these addresses. The kicker here is I want you to receive the full amount of the money I won today. But, I personally know of five other people who need to catch a break as well. If you instruct each of these people that you are giving money to call this man on the business card I gave you. He can invest your money wisely and return a sizable profit quickly and when I say quickly I mean he can build your investment up to about one hundred fifty thousand dollars in a matter of five to ten years depending on how much of your money you are willing to invest. The more you vest the faster your money will grow.”
This seemed to be somewhat of a strange request, but I did not hesitate to accept, “Sure I will do these things, but what if these people will not talk to me or accept the money?” I asked God. “You’ll find a way, I’m sure you wont have any problems!” Bob smiled mischievously. “We’ll what do you want me to do with goofy over there in the truck?” I asked God opening the door to the Shelby to begin removing myself. “Oh, don’t worry about him I’ll take care off goofball! Hey don’t get out you are driving that beast of a car not me. Too much power for me! I will return your truck tonight after I take him home. I figured you wouldn’t mind doing me those favors it saves me a heck-of-a lot of time.” “Oh, hey, I have no problem driving around in this car delivering a butt load of cash to people!” God stuck his hand out, “Thank you today was a wonderful day! We helped a lot of people today and I do mean we you helped tremendously!” “No problem partner.” I told Bob. “Oh before I forget, don’t forget to smile. Smile real big and pretty. People like that.”
“You know what irritates me is all the catch 22’s with everything.” I said to God. “What exactly do you mean catch 22’s so I know were on the same page?” “You know those certain life instances where you are damned if you do and damned if you don’t. They instances sometimes make life very hard.” I told Bob. “Hey listen those irritancies are their for a reason. Those irritancies are there to test you!” “But why do you inflict us with constant tests?” I asked Bob. “I gave you free will I don’t really care a whole lot what you do with it. I give you those irritancies in order to better yourselves most of the time. Think of this why did you quit your previous job?” “I got to the point that I hated the fucking job. I busted my ass and I was still constantly criticized.” “And in turn you quit your job; found a better one and your a lot happier because of it. I am also sure though you can come up with an instance where a catch 22 turns out for the worse.”
Bob only has 20 dollars cashes it into quarters and loses his 20 then asks me to borrow some money, then give some more money , bob keeps losing money, I then tell him I cannot give him know more than ten dollars or I’ll go broke god promises 10 grand because he will win (hand of god, wicked) I know why I am losing (devil has control of machines) throws arms in air creates scene screaming to the divine powers in the sky to overcome devils control over the machine’s and win’s 10 grand. I then ask for money and god says no. I then ask for the money I let him borrow. He say’s no. he then rushes over to the craps tables to war with the devil in a game of chance then drives devil home in his Shelby (to drunk to drive)