What not to expect from the Craft

Some people have expectations as to what they will be able to do upon deciding to become a Witch. Silly things like having a dramatic landscape. That's a Terry Pratchett thing, where in some countries the land knows what's expected of it. It will provide lightning flashes and rolls of thunder at dramatic pauses. That's one of the many things you won't get. Nor will you instantly become psychic. Telekinesis, telepathy, translocation, and so on, all of these are things that don't happen automatically, if at all. You will not be able to make someone fall in love with you. Your eyes will not have an eldritch glow in the dark, although I really wish that that would happen! Massive amounts of power will fail to be yours at your command.
Your appearance will not change overnight. Nor will your wardrobe. You are not expected to dress entirely in black. You don't have to paint your nails. You don't need to wear a pentacle the size of a dinner plate, and you don't have to wear Goth or vamp makeup. You won't be the sexy temptress of the night, or the hot, thin guy who's a magnet for the ladies (and trust me, being thin isn't a lady magnet). Your hair will not turn black overnight (but if it did! *sigh*).
Your room will not suddenly become more private. You probably won't have a special room for the spells that you will hardly ever do. You won't have a stunning altar with silk altar cloths, massive candlesticks, jewelled wands, and so on.
So what can you expect?
Expect sadness. Lots of sadness. Sadness over what your read online, mostly. Horror stories about the nastiness inflicted by intolerant and stupid parents, schoolmates, and the like. Sadness over the injustices you see in everyday life. Sadness that you seem to be the only Witch in town. That the other Witches are nincompoops who use The Craft as a handbook. That you can't be out of the broom closet. And, most of all, that we haven't got beautiful cathedrals or churches, tiny chapels tucked away in the woods, and grand high public rituals at the Sabbats.
Expect frustration. Massive amounts of frustration about the idiots that surround you. Frustration that you can't get a ride to the bookstore or witchware shop, or that there are no covens in the area, and no-one wants to start one. Frustration that some of your covenmates are idiots. Frustration that you can't have the privacy you so desire to do ritual.
Expect happiness. Happiness when you look up at the Moon and think about how beautiful it is. Happiness when looking for the constellation Orion and watching as it falls in the sky. Happiness when you commit blasphemy in the plural and recklessly commit the Seven 'Deadly Sins' and knowing all that nonsense dosen't apply to you. Happiness when you make your first robe and spend some time twirling around enjoying the sensation and occult feeling. Happiness when you cradle your Book of Shadows and find that it's so much easier to believe what's inside because you wrote it yourself. Happiness at doing a silly little dance under the night sky for the pure joy of the motion.
Expect a lot more than this.
Being a Witch is...
Knowing what the Maypole really means.
Writing in your BoS for hours until your hand is on fire, looking at the beautiful words, and knowing that it's true.
Sitting in a room filled with incense smoke, laughing at your parent's suspicions that it's drugs, and knowing what they would say if they found out why you were actually burning the incense.
Knowing the Bible better than most Christians.
Having a garden filled with plants that are deadly poison, and getting odd looks from the neighbors when you talk about how well the mandrake is coming in.
Knowing just how toxic many 'ordinary' garden plants are, and that you could put them to such better use than they're usually used for.
Having people yell 'Satanist!' at you.
Having people tell you you're wierd and wondering where the insult is.
Giggling at The Craft.
Having everything go wrong at the worst possible time.
Having everything go right at the best possible time.
Laughing at New Agers who prattle on about energizing their chakras with crystal-charged vegetables or something.
Having good music during your religious ceremonies.
Knowing that your robe looks like a dress, and not caring.
Being thought of as the local wierdo.
Being infuriated at the Vatican.
Being infuriated at Jerry Falwell.
Knowing that the things you imagine actually exist somewhere.
Sitting in a room filled with soft candlelight.


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