Buffy Says



"The Vampires! We need to kill the Vampires!"

"So, what's in the box?"

"Angel's gonna lose it. But not his soul... he's gonna lose it... his it."

"Oh, come on. That song sucks."

"A race of female demon warriors... who celebrate victory in battle by eating their foes. They couldn't just pour Gatorade on each other?"

Cordelia: You don't know where class is, do you?
Buffy: Uh...
Cordelia: Hardly a shocker. You've cut history just about every time we've had it.
Buffy: Well, I was there the first day. I think.

"Okay, we've got 10 maybe 12 bad guys and one big demon in desperate need of a Stairmaster."

"Mom, dead people are talking to you. Do the math."

"Before I was The Slayer, I was... well I don't want to say shallow, but... let's say a certain person who will remain nameless, we'll just call her Spordelia, looked like a classical philosopher next to me."

"I'm way off my game. My game's left the country. It's in Cuernavaca."

"Yeah, it's all falling into place. Of course, that place is nowhere near this place?"

"Alright, I get it. You're evil. Do we have to chat about it all day?"

"Okay. Be kind, rewind."

"All day it's been like, congratulations, go away."

"I don't play well with others."

"First rule of slaying- don't die."

"What is this, Demons Anonymous?"

"I just know that us and the undead are the only people in Sunnydale working this late."

"Buffy Summers, reporting for sanity."

"You know, polite people call before they jump out of the bushes and attack you."

"I didn't say that I'd never slay another vampire. It's not like I have all these fluffy bunny feelings for them, I'm just not gonna get way extracurricular with it."

"I'm Buffy, The Vampire Slayer. And you are?"

"Oh no. I have to go take an English make up exam. They give you credit just for speaking it, right?"

"Thanks for stopping by and dying."

"Hellmouth presents dead guys on ice."

"What, am I knowledge girl now? Explanations are your terrain."

"I'm sorry, it's just... unless Hell freezes over and every vamp in Sunnydale puts in for early retirement, I'd say my future is pretty much a non-issue."

"Cordelia, your mouth is open, sound is coming from it. This is never good."

"Could you contemplate getting over yourself for a second? There's no 'us'. Look, Angel, I'm sorry if I was supposed to spend the summer mooning over you, but I didn't. I moved on. To the living."

"Because I don't trust you. You're a vampire... oh, I'm sorry, was that an offensive term? Should I say 'undead American'?"

Jenny: "Sorry. Um, Giles wanted me to tell you that there's been a change of plans. Uh, he wants to meet you someplace near his house 'cause he had to run home and get a book or something."
Buffy: "'Cause heaven knows there aren't enough books in the library."

"Great! We'll corner him and then you can sneeze on him."

"Harmony, when you tried to be head cheerleader, you were bad. When you tried to chair the homecoming committee, you were really bad. But when you try to be bad ... you *suck*."

Buffy: "So, um, a-about being a nun... you know, um, with the whole ... abjuring the company of men ... you know, how's that working for you? The... abjuring."
Nun: "Um ... good."
Buffy: "Yeah, do you, do you have to be like super-religious?"
Nun: "Well, uh..."
Buffy: "How's the food?"

"Friends don't let friends browse alone."

Buffy: "Well, I gotta look on the bright side. Maybe I can still get kicked out of school!"
Xander: "Oh, yeah, that's a plan. 'Cause lots of schools aren't on Hellmouths."
Willow: "Maybe you could blow something up. They're really strict about that."
Buffy: "I was thinking of a more subtle approach, y'know, like excessive not studying."

"I haven't processed everything yet. My brain isn't really functioning on the higher level. It's pretty much fire:bad, tree: pretty."

"That'll put marzipan in your pie plate, bingo!"(Ok, well that was really BuffyBot how said it.)

"The... who whating how with huh?"

"If the apocolypse comes..beep me."

Buffy: "Faith told me to play on his human weakness."
Willow: "Faith told you? Was that before or after you put her into a coma?"
Buffy: "After."

Buffy: "Now if you'll excuse me, I need to go find something slutty to wear tonight."

Buffy: "I wanted a little time alone."
Spike: "Oh. Right then..."
Buffy: "That's okay. I can be alone with you here."

"Oh, I so have a reason. A darn good reason. The last time we had an earthquake, I died."

Giles: "Buffy, may I have a word?"
Buffy: "Have a sentance even."

Buffy: "What is this?"
Amy: "It's not what you think it is - it's sage."
Buffy: "That is what I think it is."

"It's the weirdest thing. He's got two little, little holes in his neck and all his blood's been drained. Isn't that bizzare? Aren't you just going 'ooooooh'?"