~Drawing The Snail~
Knowing how to draw the snail is probably the most valuable pieces of knowledge you will ever come across. Since they are creatures posessing vanity as their biggest weakness, any attemps to portray them in the art, literary, or political world brings them great joy. The government have tried and succeeded to keep "how to draw the snails" undercover, for a while only available to the rich society and famous clowns (ronald,bozo,etc.) But at last, we bring society what they must need to know, what is their right to know! When the snails come for you, just remember, these steps have been proven to work in some cases. Certain conditions apply see your local snail for details.
Drawing the Snail Step 1 through 4 - as the snail tries to use it's hypnotic eye beams to bring you in a delusional state of mind, draw the swirls you see within it's franticly waving dialated enraged pupils. Next, in step 5 draw a shadow of it's body, your hands will be shaking very bad at this point, but keep steady and make sure you keep a level head, you're almost finished! For the last stage, add a dazzling colgate smile and make sure the dotted eyes speak ones of elightenment and wisdom, power, of love. The eyes are the most important detail, for if you portray them as wimpy eyes, your soul shall be doomed forever within the snails grasp.
and you're done! ..or are you the snails next snack...(creepy music inserted here)
