Angel 5.14 - Smile Time
This episode would've been much more enjoyable had there not been the cloud of cancellation hanging over the TV set. It's hilarious episodes like this that make Angel's cancellation so much more painful to swallow. Apparently, around the same time that the WB announced it was pulling the plug on Angel, it renewed Charmed. It was an early renewal too and networks rarely do that in reality TV-land nowadays. Charmed's totally undeserved renewal makes the cancellation even more bitter because it's the worst show on the WB's pitiful roster. Longest-running show on the WB. But by far the worst. If you want ratings, WB, clone Dawson's Creek and pit it against The O.C. Hormone-ravaged teens would be besides themselves.

Anyway, Smile Time. Puppet-Angel needs more screen time. He was so cool. Vamped-Puppet-Angel was even better. You know who else needs more screen time? Spike. His role has been reduced to beating up Puppet-Angel and then disappearing again. Pretty soon, he's going to get fewer lines than Harmony. Spike needs fast cars all the time because he keeps crashing them, but what's keeping him from taking the Viper leaving W&H altogether? Joss better be thinking of something to make both Angel and Spike Shanshu properly.

Fred and Wes' was long-awaited kiss was nice. It was satisfying. Until the next episode. It better be good since Joss wrote and directed it. Do science nerds wear mini-skirts underneath a lab coat? Or was she trying to attract Wes?

Angel has been such a goof on romance that he can't even believe that Nina likes him. Which is strange because for the first 3 seasons of Buffy, Angel was supposed to be the smoldering hunk. So Angel is a goof around girls other than Buffy?!

There were some funny lines too. The puppets saying that they steal childern's souls while upholding a quality standard of edutainment. Lorne saying Smile Time is the highest rated show in its timeslot and telling Angel that he can't just jihad the place. Fred trying to touch Puppet-Angel and calling him cute. Some Bush-bashing when Gunn and Wes talk to the puppeteer guy.

This was a solid episode. If only the damn show wasn't cancelled. *sticks middle finger up at WB execs*

Operation Occupation
I've decided to take a break from brooding and blog instead. I've been trying to keep my mind off Angel for the past 72 hours. Anything that doesn't trigger thoughts of Angel. Studying. Cleaning my room. Going on downloading frenzies. Studying. Checking the library site for the 50th time to see if my copy of ASoS has come yet. Figuring out those physics problems. Looking for a job. Watching the Coldplay DVD over and over again. Studying. Rearranging my sock drawer.

No words or thoughts exist to describe the utter devastation and void left by the death of Angel. Imagine, only 8 episodes left to properly conclude the show before the remnants of Jossverse get sucked into WB's black hole faster than you can say 'WB is a shitty network run by anal-retentive, hairline-retreating bastards.' I wasn't this sad when Buffy ended because you felt like the show its full course. And it was half-expected because Sarah Michelle Gellar was at the end of her contract and her growing disloyalty to her fans was becoming more and more apparent. But Angel. New energy. New set. New writers. New stories. New characters. But none of that matters anymore. Good television doesn't matter anymore.

I saw Britney Spears' new video, "Toxic". That song is so annoying it gives me earwax just listening to it. The scene at the end where she steals a bottle of green goo is shamelessly stolen from the pilot of Alias. In the pilot, Jennifer Garner breaks into this vault thing while sporting a fire-red wig and a skin-tight black (but not leather) suit. Britney is smart enough to watch Alias? Because that show's plot may not be as philosophically deep as Buffy or Angel but is so complex that it makes your head spin even if you're just being a couch potato.

Okay, that was counter-productive. I was on a roll, then I had to go mention Buffy and Angel.

The Sarillorn quoted me on her blog. No one has ever done that before. And I wasn't aware that I have an eloquent streak. Thanks, dude.

The Kiss of Death from the WB
It's Valentine's Day. It doesn't apply to me so I couldn't care less. Rather, I feel like skinning some people alive. I woke up this morning to check my e-mail. I was minding my own damn business when I come across the press release from the WB saying that Angel won't have a season six. WTF?!

Damn those WB execs. I'll be happy to kill them all. Apparently, the announcement came on Friday the 13th. Great timing. Two weeks ago, Angel aired its 100th and they had a huge party in December when they were filming the episode. The pricks who make all the decisions must've been like "Oh let's go to that party! Hot chick reporters! We can tell them we're cancelling the show later." Or maybe the WB assholes finally figured out that Angel running W&H was one huge corporate rant by Joss Whedon in revenge of the whole Buffy moving to UPN fiasco. Angel should move to UPN or something. Or HBO. Or whatever station. I just want the show to live. Please don't make me watch The O.C.

Back to the ranting. Cancelling Angel is outrageous. Obviously, it wasn't Joss' idea or anybody else's except for those WB dipshits who don't have much upstairs. Even all the TV critics have been saying Angel has been resusitated this season and hasn't been alienating to new viewers. So the ratings aren't fabulous but they were much better than last year's So why the hell are you cancelling it? WHY??????

If you dicks at the WB are pulling the plug on Angel to put your money into Dark Shadows, the stupid vampire soap by John Wells, you're even more lacking in brain cells than I thought. You think Ats and BtVS fans will just love it because it's about vampires. It really is a shame that we're not stupid like you think we are. We know John Wells is the guy that produced ER. Granted, he has a good track record. It's blatant that the WB wants to create a show that was just like Buffy during its 2nd and 3rd seasons so it can get more teenyboppers watching your soddin' network again. But John Wells just can't do that because in case you haven't noticed, his name isn't Joss Whedon. Same initials, but spelled differently. Just because you WB psychos aren't smart enough to understand Angel doesn't mean you have to make everyone else stoop to your level.

Enough ranting. I have no more words. I think I'll go brood for awhile. Then maybe I'll shift to withdrawal.

Angel 5.13 - Why We Fight
Was it just me, or was that one of the most incoherent and inconsistent hours of television ever aired? I'm so disappointed because Drew Goddard and Stephen S.DeKnight wrote this one. Damage was infinitely better.

There are too many problems with this episode.

1) The most memorable lines were: Angel (to Spike) "You're a Nazi?" Spike: "No, I just ate one." The second most memorable line was Spike calling Lawson 'Popeye' for a reason I can't even remember. Grrr..Did Goddard and DeKnight write this thing two hours before the deadline?

2) Spike looked really wrong with the slick black hair. It was such a relief to see him blonde again at the end.

3) Um, why exactly did Lawson show up at W&H in the first place? At the end, Angel branded it as 'no reason'. Huh? I thought Lawson was all about avenging the stereotypical all-American life that Angel took away from him.

4) The scenes in the submarine where Angel teaches the ways of the world to Lawson were interesting. There was some deep and thoughtful dialogue going on there. But the writers either ran out of ideas or had university midterms and Lawson transformed into a bigger wimp than Andrew. Lawson obviously didn't believe in what he was saying nor did he seem so hell-bent on revenge as one would have presumed.

5) Why did Lawson wait so damn long to attempt his revenge? This detail was blatantly ignored. Angel was more vulnerable at Angel Investigations than running the W&H gig from behind a corporate fortress. I thought W&H had massive security that only Lindsey's runes could make anyone pass through undetected.

6) The fight scene between Lawson and Angel was way too short. Rule #1 in Hollywood: If the dialogue isn't great, cover it up with blood spilling and heads rolling. But nooo.. the fight scene stopped so mid-fight it was as if the producers decided that they didn't have enough money to break and build another door or coffee table.

7)The last scene of the show also ended embryotically. Spike and Angel have pretty decent one-on-one conversations when the writers let it. I want to know who the hell cut this scene off. The last shot of Spike and Angel staring off into the LA skyline could've used some of the serious dialogue that the Ultimate Drew is known for.

I'm trying to think of good things about this episode. But I can't. So I'll stop. The 100th episode last week raised the bar by about ten thousand metres. This one doesn't even get off the filthy ground.

Trappage
I don't care if trappage doesn't appear in the Oxford Dictionary. Anyway, this isn't some uber-depressing entry about how much my life sucks or how I feel socially claustrophobic.

It just so happens that yesterday, my dad locked his keys in the car with the engine running and had to wait for an hour before someone could come and rescue him. I couldn't stop laughing because all this happened in the driveway after he came home from work.Trapped keys.

Three hours before at school, I saw someone being trapped in the elevator for almost an hour. That was funny too because I was studying in those cubicles when this alarm keeps going off. So I thought, "What the hell? This is so annoying." Some time later, some maintenance guys come up and try to pry the door open to no avail. They talk to the guy in the elevator, saying things like "It's okay. We called the elevator company. They should be here in a few minutes. There's plenty of fresh air in there!! And you're trapped between floors so we can't get you out just yet. Sit tight!!" Trapped people.

It was a hilarious day.

Random Folks
I don't know if you've had the privilege to meet this type of people. Random Folks are defined as those self-confident (or crazy) enough to go up to complete strangers in a random fashion and attempt to start conversations with them. What's even worse is that these Random Folks look just like the rest of us Normal Folks. So you would never know you were talking to a Random Folk until you're stuck and forced to nod and smile while they ask you a million questions that they have no right to ask. There's convergent evidence that this isn't just isolated to one person.

Case I
It was ten minutes before the calculus exam. I was waiting in an overly crowded space outside the gym with my acquaintances when this short girl comes up to us and starts asking us how to do these derivatives and whether you think the exam will be hard etc. None of us know her.. we just know her by her extremely annoying voice. So we all look at each other awkwardly and try to answer her questions. But she has moved on to invade another stranger's privacy, leaving all of us feeling . Less than ten seconds later, that stranger has that deer-caught-in-the-headlights all over his face. But before he can respond, she's already gone to talk to other strangers.

Case II
This happened more recently. I was waiting for the biology lecture with similar acquaintances. Then this guy from Sudan comes up to us and starts asking things like "Are you guys in first year?" That was a fair question. Then he moves on to "Where are you guys from? Hong Kong? Singapore? Japan? Korea? Malaysia? China?" We don't even make eye contact with him when we answer. And then he lets on that he's from Sudan. Do we know where that is? So I play dumb and say Middle East even though he was as dark as coals. Then he scoffs and says Canadians don't know anything! Don't they teach anything in Canadian schools? Sudan is like the largest country in Africa! Too bad all of us are pretending to be totally engrossed in Raptors scores or in my case, the 5-panel "Zits" in the comic. So creepy guy from Sundan finally gets the hint and stops talking. He would've started talking to other strangers, but he didn't because we were the only ones there.

Random Folks. Creepy as hell. They must've went to a high school with a very forgiving population. Otherwise, they would know that the social rules of engagement in high school also applies to university and life in general. But I guess Random Folks would make great street reporters.. that is, if they don't alienate us Normal Folks first.

Angel 5.12 - You're Welcome (100th episode!)
Buffy's 100th episode, (Season Five's finale "The Gift") was nowhere near as memorable as Angel's 100th. I didn't even know that Buffy's 100th was "The Gift" until five minutes ago when I looked it up. "The Gift" wasn't really the 'milestone' episode that it was supposed to be. Besides, it didn't get as much attention from the media as Angel's 100th did. It was a perfect episode with an even more perfect ending.

Joss Whedon didn't even have write or direct this episode and it was this good. This episode had more drama packed in it than all the other episodes combined. The funniest parts: Angel agreeing to Tuesday racquetball with someone that looks like the Devil, Lorne saying he was probably making some filthy demon urine right then and there when he saw the blade Gunn was holding up, Cordelia calling Eve "Lilah junior", Cordelia asking "Who's Colin Farrell?", and Cordelia telling Spike that her soul was better than his.

I'm not sure how any story or any character could have more closure than LOTR. But Cordy did. You would've thought that the part where Spike talks civilly to Angel after having his hands reattached in "Damage" was heavy. But that last scene with Angel picking up the phone and finding out that she died (after they shared a final kiss) was the most bittersweet moment in the history of Buffyverse. Nothing on Buffyverse has ever initiated this finally-nailing-the-last-nail-on-the-coffin feeling. Even though I hadn't seen Cordy in action for so long, I could still feel the closure. Damn, if Angel ever ends, it better go out with enough closure for both Buffy and Angel. I don't want any of that quasi-closure stuff that Buffy finale "Chosen" emulated.

Supposedly, Angel is going through a ratings revival. So it better be picked up for another 2 or 3 seasons. I really don't want to watch American Idol. Or Survivor All-Stars. Or anything that could result in a breast being revealed "accidentally".

A Clash of Kings
I can't believe I got through the 700 page ordeal before mid-terms. *pats myself on the back and beams*

The only other known person to have read Asoiaf was right: ACoK is heavy on exposition. GRRM doesn't tie up any loose ends from AGoT. He starts more.

Characters like Dany doesn't do much in the book except go from city to city with her dragons in tow in search of ships and an army. Renly finally comes into the story. But his main purpose was to die instead of going to war with Stannis first. Theon Greyjoy turned evil, which was interesting because he actually saved Bran's life in AGoT. He didn't seem that horny in AGoT either. Stupid, yes. But not horny. They way Asha deceived Theon at the docks was hilarious. Jojen and Meera are very cool. I want moss in my armpits too. But Bran's mind-shifting thing and Ja'quen's shape-shifting thing are even more cool. Arya should've went with Ja'quen to learn how to do that, instead of escaping with Gendry and Hot Pie. Arya's pretty brave for a ten year old. Compared to her, Gendry and Hot Pie are complete sissies. At least Gendry seems like a hot guy. Otherwise, what's with all those descriptions about his muscles and his blue, blue eyes?

The best deception has to be the part near the end where GRRM makes you think that Theon killed Bran and Rickon and put their heads on the gates. Renly's death was probably cruel enough.

The most unlikely hero has to be Podrick Payne, Tyrion's squire. Shy squire by day, knight in shining armor by night. I hope Pod doesn't die.

Apparently, a lot of people are going to die in A Storm of Swords. That'll have to wait. At this rate, I'll be finished before the fourth book is published. This is unbelievable, considering that less than 2 months ago, AGoT was still sitting quietly on my shelf untouched and unopened.

Now I have to go deal with that thing known as mid-terms. I hope my blog isn't boring. Few people read it as it is, but I hope I write stuff that's actually worth reading. Unlike.. Joan's inner thoughts which are as crazy as they are embarrassingly tunnel-visioned ..

Angel 5.11 - Damage
Awww.. Andrew is all growed up. His Watcher garb, a suit that was two sizes too big, was a nice touch. Too bad the writers still can't come up with a decent excuse as to why Spike didn't go Buffy-hunting in Europe. The female writers from the last episode mucked up Spike's character so badly that not even Drew Goddard could clean it up.

As for the rest of the Scoobies, Willow and Kennedy in Brazil? Eww. Kennedy showed up only so Willow can continue reminding everyone that she's a lesbian. Are they finding their Amazon roots?

The funniest bits that didn't involve Andrew: Spike and Angel coming out of the elevator together and Spike's line "I just wanted to see what bouncing off the pavement felt like. Pretty much what I expeted." after he gets thrown off the building by the Potential. Andrew stole the whole show. Not that I'm complaining. Better Andrew steal the show than Gunn. (Gunn won't be stealing any shows unless he turns evil and is subconsciously controlled by the Senior Partners. Unbeknowst to the Fang Gang, of course. Now that is a sub-plot worth exploring. Take note of that, Ultimate Drew. Take many notes of that, you lowly-dwelling female writers of Angel who shall remain nameless. Actually, you suck. Both of you. Neither of you deserve to be a writer on Angel. So I don't care what your name is.)

Andrew...Andrew...he's just so damn funny. His lines were always the best, full of Buffy and other sci-fi/fantasy references. The best part was when he hugged Spike and called him his Frodo. The second best part was when he stood his ground against Angel. Imagine that?! This was inconceivable before the Hellmouth collapsed. Andrew's changed. That funny, shy, nerdy costume is no longer worn--he's replaced it with a heavy cloak, a spine, and a dangerous mask can pull off a jest just as quickly as a kill.

Unless there's a huge petition, Andrew's chance to become a regular on Angel has pretty much gone up in smoke. Andrew has drawn his allegiance with Buffy and that makes it unlikely he'll show up in L.A. again. *sob*

Another note to the writers: We get it. We get that Angel and his Fang Gang are worried about selling out. So stop reminding us every three seconds.

The Inaugural Entry
This blogging thing... is actually cool. Even if ads cover half the page, it's still cool. My fellow Alpha Pluses-- I know this blog is long, long overdue. But better late than never.

> Bennifer is dead! About time. Their careers were beyond resustation anyway.
> Halfway through "A Clash of Kings". I'm hoping to finish before the dawn of midterms.
> I have to go do physics homework now.