The Body Count
The characters, how they die, and the humorous comments afterwards
- applies acid-laced cold cream to her face
Constable Hooke's remark: "That goo was a real wrinkle remover indeed!"
- a red velvet suit that crushes him into pieces
(a pun on "crushed velvet"!)
Constable Hooke's remark: "...sort of like a jigsaw puzzle, you might say!"
- drinks drugged cognac, then gets compacted by a garbage truck,
leaving only one foot lying on the ground
Jonesy's remark: "I've heard the expression 'one foot in the grave', but..."
- decapitated in a secret alcove
Constable Hooke's remark: "Killed in the line of duty, he was!"
and Evan - crushed flat together in the shower (bodies are later
found in a wrecked car)
Karen (right before being crushed): "Evan, I do feel close to you!"
Constable Hooke's remark: "Flat as griddlecakes, they were!"
- Hester killes him with a shovel and buries him
Hester's remark: "The grave isn't for Arnie...it's for you, Jonesy!"
- entombed alive with Arnold's ashes and money
Hester's remark: "...you're teasing me, Arnie!"
Hester's cat ("Pussy") - pecked to pieces by the graveyard raven at the end!
Go back to the ARNOLD index page