Quotes!
"Who sings this? Well why don't you let him sing it?"-Paula to Steve, as he was singing.
"He couldn't sell condoms in a Calcutta whorehouse"-Larry about a sales guy
"Back up 'til it sounds expensive"-Don, lol
"Wanna go upstairs to the beach?"-Brian to Danni
"Sorry to dissappoint you but there is no porn on my website"-Kim to Warren and gang
"She's Stalin in a sweater"-About Paula:P
"What if I told you I got with her so that I could get with you?"-Greg who's last name I don't know to Kim, lol
"You're the most gorgeous non-cabrini girl I've ever seen here"-Some random guys at Cabrini outside the dorms
"So what are we gonna do? ...chicken fingers, huh?" -Kim
"If I had a nutsack, they'd be licking it." -Erin
"We need some Peter-Fuckin' Frampton!" -Kim
"You can't steal me, I beep!" -Jeri
Erin: "He's licking the community fork!"
Mark: " Looks like I found my utensils!"
"Okay, blow me...there's no 'K' in that either!!" -Mark
Circuit City Sign: "Come in and explore."
Erin: "I'm gonna go in there with spelunking gear!"
Kimmer: "You got a speeding ticket on 4-95?!?"
Crispy: "Yup"
Kimmer: "I'm so proud of you!!!!!!"
Jeri: "You guys have to remind me to get sunglasses this weekend!"
Joe: "What kind?"
Kimmer: "Glasses that block the sun"
Mark: "Don't mess with a man and his cucumber!!!!!!!!!!"
*hysterical laughter at table*
Mark: "That sounded wrong, didn't it?"
Mark: "My girlfriend just called me a pussy!!"
Joe: "That's cuz you are"
Mark: "Well, you're a wussy!"
Matt: "Acura, making your car look better"
Kim: "Kim, making your balls look smaller"
"Get the fuck back in the car"-this guy Phil who was talking to his drunk friend who was trying to climb out the window while talking to us, lol.
"I'm stuck in a balloon"-Danielle, who actually was stuck in a balloon
"Mental note to self, buy the Dick soundtrack"-Danielle.... "What would have been funnier is if you said mental note to self, buy Dick"-Jeri to Danielle
"Heaven is between my toes"-Kim, on the beach
"J. Lo's a ho like whoah!"-Jeri
"I want a big tiki man so I can sit on his lips."-Danielle
Danielle: "Seth Green is wet!"
Jeff: "That's because I'm here."
"It's like eating random shit you find on the street."-Kim
"Damn punkrockers!"-Inside Joke, Jeri and Kim (hehe, you know this)
"Make me my car bitch!"-Nikki
"I'm gonna climb up that tree so that I can have green stuff coming out of my ass."-Danielle
"Come out now! The cops are on their way!"-The evil whore bitch of Forwood
"There's a time to lay off the crack and then there's a time to lay off the crack."-Mark
"Why be a monogamist when you can be a bygamist?"-Jeri
"Welcome to Maryland! Enjoy your mullet!"-Jeri
"Horray for Schlong!"-Erin, Katie & Kim, yelling that at people on 202
"Kim, stop dieing for a minute"-KT, as Kim is sneezing
"The camera guy tried to untie my dress"-KT
"Is your friend coming?"-Jakey
"I dunno"-KT
"What kind of car does he have?"-Jakey
"Jake, it's a mustang"-KT
"A mustang gay, ewwwww"-Jakey
"I'm gonna work at the Ravioli house to make their pizza better"-Nikki
"Dave's car is the color of this ice cream"-Kim and Katie
"I'm ashamed"-Nikki
"Why?"-Katie
"Your pizza's better"-Nikki after talking bad about our pizza
"Look how small that purse is"-Kim
"Yeah, you can fit one codom in there"-Nikki
"Oh my god!"-Kim and Katie
"I looked good in my prom dress, I didn't look fat, did I? I didn't look fat, right?"-Nikki
"I've never had so much fun shopping for fruit"-Nikki
"It takes batteries in the handle, ummmmmm"-Katie V
"It's a big furry thing"-Nikki, don't ask.....
"The Jeri-Go-Round."-The new name of the Berry-Go-Round courtesy of Kim and Erin
"I'm gonna whirl my tilt."-Erin, on the Tilt-a-Whirl
"Sexy!"-Nikki, yelling at the Tilt-a-Whirl carnie
"Carnie!"-Nikki and Erin, screaming that about 100 times on the Super Sizzler
"I feel like hitting something with a stick now. Kim, can I borrow your face?"-Nikki
"I'm a carnie whore."-Nikki, after being hit on by every carni at every ride
"Whistle at me too!"-Jeri after guys riding down the street whistle at Kim
"God hates little boys!"-Mickey, tormenting a small child on Pharoah's Fury
"Did you hear about the pirate movie? It's rated Rrrrrrrrrr."-Jeremy, after finding a random pirate sword on the ground
"I'm gonna be sick!"-Mickey and Jeremy, after spinning the berry ride a little too fast
"Where's me Lucky Charms?"-My impression of David
"Oh, I forgot, there's people around."-Mickey, after grabbing Jeremy's truth sign and humping it in front of a long line of people
"Have you heard this song? *makes farting noise* It's from a new band called Flatulence."-Jeremy
"My ovaries!"-Erin, while riding the Gravitron
"My nose is big. Big like a pickle."-Erin, singing The Humpty Dance (dude Erin, you rock!)
"I'm gonna ride with all the guys cause I'm the Man's Lady."-Jeri
"Yarrrrr"-Mickey with his wooden pirate's sword
"Chicken leg Carney"-Nikki and Katie
"God hates people wearing blue shirts, you're too short to get into heaven, you know what the worst feeling is? when you know you're going to DIE"-Mickey screaming at some poor kid on the Pharaoh's Fury at the carnival
"Why do you build me up?"-Mickey down on bended knee screaming to Katie at prom pretending to be devastated
"Let's get an ass shot on the beach"-Kim with the camera
"Look, I'm Pamela Anderson"-Nikki running in slow motion down the beach
"You guys, the ravioli house is sooooo good"-Nikki as her eyes bulge out of her head
"Sugar Sugar"-Nikki singing and dancing on stage like an idiot, she thught she was alone, but there was this guy in a folding chair....
"That house looks like an airplane landing field"-KT
"That's the way my mom likes it"-Dave
"I hate that house, it's so cool"-KT
"Yeah, that's my house"-Dave
"Oh, and I suppose that's YOUR MOM waving from the window?"-Kim
"I'm not a bad guy"-Mickey and Jeff at prom with bandanas around their heads and canes pointed like swords
"That wave just hit me in the ass"-KT
"Don't drop me in"-Nikki as Katie holds her over the ocean
"Big head"-Kim and Nikki about Katie
"CHINK!"-KT and Kim about Nikki
"I fired him!"-Kim, talking about her ex-prom date
"Prom=Death"-what Kimmer had written on her hand for a week before prom
"Kim! You don't drag race do you?"-Ms. Ruffner
"Padua Academy.....where young girls with dreams turn into women in community college"-Nikki
"Oh my God, Ranch House is closed"-Kim
"You're so evil!"-Jeremy, talking to his Cradle of Filth cd
"Jeri, you're so evil. I'm so proud!"-Kim
"Mustang faygele."-Jeri
"It's purple!"-Danielle, after seeing "Seth Green" in the daylight
"I have T-Top hair."-Jeri, after getting out of Joe's Camaro
"Kim: Fuckin' A"
"Danielle: No thanx, I don't do courtesy"
"Kim: I said fuckin' A, not fuckin YOUR A"
"Beware of the horny Pollock"-me to KTV, I KNOW this!
"Kim is the woman. If she were a man she would be the man."-Jeremy, singing to Kim
"Franklin Fuckin' Mint."-Jeri, everytime we drive past the Mint on the way to the mall
"This dude's a beast!"-Two 12 year olds, talking about Jeremy
"Commie bastards!"-Our new phrase
"I wish I had a camera. I wish I knew how to paint. If I could paint, that would be my fuckin' picture."-Kim, while looking at the moon
"I do not like green eggs and ham."-Danielle, reading to Jeri and Kim and Barnes & Fuckin' Noble
"So hump the jump."-Jeri, butchering the words to a Dr. Seuss book
"Kim had her magnet and ate it too."-Jeri, after Kim licked the ice cream off her magnet
"Your other left!"-Jeri, after Kim turned right when she told her to turn left
"Jeff. P-A-G-E-R. Jeff."-Jeff, spelling his name
"I'm kicking you both off the magic carpet!"-Kim, to Jeri and Danielle
"We don't do that"-Mark in a funny voice
"Reindeer effect"-Mark and Jeff , lol
"STEVES!"-Dedicated to my Steves, I love you all!
"Smells like incense burning"-Daniel, lol
"It looks like a flying squirrel"-Kimmer in art history
"Straight Edge Wiccan Hardcore"-Kimmer and Jeremy, hehehe
Hey Kevin and Tim, seen any rabbits lately?
"Get ready, I'm throwing it in 2"-Kim when she's speeding in her camry, hehe
"Huminah huminah huminah, TRANS AM RAM AIR"-Katie, Kim, and Danni in my car
"I dont like this....am I gonna be kidnapped?"-Ashton
"My head's been in the gutter since I was 13"-Mickey
"Guys that don't lie have no interest in you"-Kim to Katie
"Come to the backseat"-Travis!
"I got hit on by a 30 year old Mexican"-Danielle
"Fat dirty mexican on a motorbike! ahhhhhhhhh!"-Katie
"Katie, where are you? Your food is getting cold....and eaten"-Kim, a la Simpsons
"CoPORNicus"-Katie
"Mustang gay!"-Ledge and Ferry
"This is so gay, oh wait, he is gay"-Erin, lol
"You guys are just like us, except for the drugs"-Ledge
"Hubbit?"-our word for what? or huh?
"Is that a jet stream or are you happy to see me?"-Katie in the hot tub, lol
Hey Nikki....."MALE BROTHEL!" lol
"It's the ladies couch!"-Jeri as we're watching the Ladies Man.
"Never take candy from strangers"-Kim
"Unless they're hot"-Danni
"Give me a T-Give me an R-Give me an A-S-H, what does that spell? KIM!"-thanx Jeremy
"The first word I teach my kid will be 'whorebitch,' no, wait, 'mullet,' or 'bastard'-Nikki
"Seagull.....Dirty Bird!"-Someone at my lunch table referring to a dude from my near past
"Why don't you just take the cracker and shove it up the chicken's ass"-Nikki at lunch, lol
"Danielle spewed sugar"-Kim
"Danielle is easy, Kim is a novice"-Jeff R, and I am not!
"It's a chastity belt"-Jeff R in response to the safety pin on my belt
"Love-noun-A temporary insanity curable by mairrage or by removal of the patient from the infleunces under which he/she incurred the disorder"-A. Bierce
"I feel like I'm chasing my tail, please let go of me"-Katie V
"Did I here a niner?"-Mike and Nell
"I'm scared of Nicole's hair."-Katie's little brother Jake
Jeri: "We can make the little Blair Witch stick figures and put them all around the couch."
Katie: "I've got breadsticks we can use... or carrots... or string cheese."
"Katie, I'm gonna shove that clock up your ass!"-Kim at Katie's sleepover in response to her alarm clock ticking loudly
"Come get crabs at Dirty Dicks"-this was a bumper sticker that we spotted at the mall, hehe
"There needs to be Jesus Bread."-Jeri
"This is our new friend Law-Abiding Kim."-Jeri, in response to Kim's driving on the way home from Ranch House after Tom saves her from getting a ticket on 202
"Your mom does not own my mom!"-Kim
"Bitter Island....population, you!"-Jeri
"I want a limestone penis"-Katie while watching the Wedding planner, you have to see the movie to get that
"Awwww! The traffic poster, I'm so gonna sleep with an usher to get that!"-Jeri......dude, Jeri, you're my hero!
"Valentine's day can fall off the roof and die"-Danielle
"I can't wait to see a camarobird in my driveway"-Danielle
"A camarobird?"-Courntey
"Don't you mean a camaro and a firebird?"-Kim
"Hehe, yeah, oops"-Danielle
"No wait, somebody get me a Camaro, a Firebird, and a blow torch, this could work......"-Kim
"No now, sounds like a chinese cuisine.....would you like some no now?"-Jeff R
"There's good poofy, and then there's bad poofy"-Kim and Lauren in history, commenting on Glinda's dress
"I'm gonna go smoke a french fry now"-Joe Mack, who thought that my story of Mike smoking a french fry was great:)
"Sting cheese string cheese"-Kim and Jeri
"Jeremy, would your mom totally hate us if we dropped by un-invited?"-Kim
*silence*-Jeremy, as we realize he can't here us cause he has his headphones on
"Jeremy, I wanna fuck you"-Kim
*silence*-Jeremy
*lots of laughter*-Kim and Jeri, and then Katie when she hears what happened
Hey Katie, he's totally "f'able", right?
5 THINGS PEOPLE SAY THAT THEY CAN'T TAKE BACK-by Kim and Nikki:
1.) "We need to take a break"
2.) "I'm not sure I love you anymore"
3.) "I love you, but I'm not in love with you"
4.) "We need to talk"
5.) "We broke up, but we'll probably get back together"
"I'm soooo going where they're going"-Kim as two hot guys walk by at Cafe Riviera
"DUFF"-designated ugly fat friend
"Ya know what I was thinking Kim? Ledge is hot"-Katie
"Yeah, but you've got Jeremy"-Kim
"But if I didn't, totally fuckable...."-Katie
"Snort some Mr Pibb, wash that bitch down"-Katie V at Wendy's
"Me and you were big pimpin it on the couch"-Danni talking to Kim about Saturday night with Mickey and Bill.
"Then I remembered he was a bad monkey and I kicked him in the face"-Danni quoting Bubbles the Power Puff girl.
"That ownz!"-Jeremy
"Look, I'm writing on Kim's quote page!"-Katie V in psychology while Kim isn't looking! (By the way Katie, the actual quotes page in my binder is sacred, don't touch it ever again!)
"Shit, I mean shoot!"-Diane in front of Mr B
"You're driving a Camaro without a stick shift?"-Any one of the people at Danielle's house Sat night, this was said to Bill with an incredulous stare.....
*Drops french fry as loud car goes by* "Tom.....? Where's Tom?-Katie V at Wendy's
"Fuck you Brew Ha Ha"-Tom
"Ba-na-na"-nuff said
"Kim, where do I go?"-Tom
"I dunno, make a right"-Kim
"Where?"-Tom
"I dunno, make a right, any right!"-Kim
"Hey you, come back!"-Tom to Danielle as she was leaving the room, hehe, it was funny, at least me and Danielle thought so.....
Funny story time! I bought Tom a model of a Shelby GT 350 for x-mas, and I finally got around to giving it to him, and of course he loved it (he was cute! like a little kid on x-mas!). After he left Nell's house he got pulled over and this is what happened (I'm quoting Tom here....): "cop takes my info
turns around, turns back, looks at it, in the passanger seat, says, "what year is that," I said 69 shelby gt 350, he goes "great car," I was like, yeah, my girlfriend got it for me, she looked all over for the 500 but couldn't find it, he goes thats a shame, then he's like i'm a big fan of the 67 fastbacks, i agreed of course, and we started talking cars, and at the end he goes "well i'm gonna give you your info back, and you're gonna have a nice night, ok?"
HOW COOL IS THAT?
"I hit the reject button instead"-Mr Potter
"My turn, focus on me"-Alicia in Psych03"
"Don't boink me!"Kim to Danni
"The flying Llamas are coming to get me"-Danielle
"I just wanna thank you for ruining whatever friendship we could have had-"Bridget
My response: "You're welcome!"
Hey Nicole....."Word" "Twice" and "MULLET!"
"Hang out with you and guys, go to work, what do I wanna do"-Danielle answering Kim about coming to crew.
"You'll find another wheel"-Kimmer
"Save me tha monkeys are comin to get me"-Danielle
"Fly fat ass fly"-Mall Rats, Mike Davis made me think to put this up.
"They're like the Berenstein Bears, porno style"-Kim talking about the people making out next to us at the Feastival
"The Whooooooooooo"-Jeri and Kim
"Dude, he's making sweet love to the microphone"-Kim commenting on Ed from Live
"Sheman"-nuff said
"Movin to the country, gonna eat a lot of peaches"-Kim
"No, going this way you're gonna eat a lot of mushrooms"-Katie V as we head into Landenberg
"No stopping, standing, or mullet."Katie V, viewing the mullet sticker on a sign in Wilmington
"We need an old priest, and a new priest"
"Aaaaaaaaaaamen"-Katie V
"Lets watch Daisy die"-Mrs Markham referring to the electrocution of Daisy the elephant. May she R.I.P.
"Shit you guys, my purse smellls like Bailey's Irish Cream"-Danielle
"Stop molesting the balloon"-Katie V
"I'm a prostitute to learning"-Mrs Markham
"Kim's dog is 63 in dog years, he's a pedophile. Jeremy's dog is 7, he is an attempted serial rapist"-Katie V
"Trick or X-mas"-Jeremy
"You don't wear a bad religion shirt to bed! What's wrong with you?!?!"-Lauren talking to Crispy
"My mom is adjusting my boobies"-Evan, referring to his seashell bra for Halloween!
"Snoogins Cafe"-Katie and Kim talking about our future
"The morals I'd lose for that boy"-Danielle
"Round up the Clan"-Lauren in history
"Gerad"-Nicole, trying to spell Jared
"F#$% you"-Random person
"No thanks, I don't do courtesy"-Danielle
"Kim, I'm going to go home, place a french book on my head and learn by osmosis, then I am going to come in and have conversations with you guys in french"-KT
"If you think it's that easy then you're nuts"-Kimmer
"It's easy for me Kim, cause I have a mental disorder"-KT
"He's a headless male nude"-Mr Potter
"Curse and blast me"-Mr Potter
"Why am I getting hit on in an all girls school?"-Kimmer in Trig
"Listen to me, I'm funny!"-Katie V
"This is the evil version of Hello Kitty"-Kimmer referring to her purse.
"Polynomial here, alright break it up"-Miss Missimer
"You're crazy"-Danielle in Trig
"My fan is giving me a blow job"-Jeremy
"F&*$k you"-Kim
"No thank you, you're not my type"-Diane
"It's snowing in Selma"-Mrs. Markham
"Beef"-Wendys sticker which is now on my purse thanx to Tom.
"He killed her, the son of a bitch"-Kimmer, referring to My Last Duchess
"Cut me a slice of that"-Lauren in history
"More blood!"-Lauren referring to the excitement of Kimmer
"T-t-today junior!"-Kim and Jeri in Mike's truck trying to get him to hurry back.
"Emergency appendectomy heart surgery"-Jeri
"I don't like you cause you speculate"-Kim talking to Daniel.
"Mike! Stop staring at my ass!"-Jeri
"I'll have the cheeseburger"-Jeri, three nights in a row.
"Squeeze my wet chicken"-Katie in foods class
AND NOW, QUOTES COMING TO YOU STRAIGHT TO YOU FROM NEW
YORK..........
"Dude, if I wear these glasses will I get into Harvard?"-Nicole
"Put a loincloth on that monkey"-Me
"Dude, I just buffed that jade with my ass"-Nicole
"I have butterflies in my stomach"-Nicole
"I'm all about just copying the answers"-Nicole
"Oh my god, look, it's a rabbi!"-Diane
"That is soooo an Elvis wannabe"-Diane
"Christ Nicole, you just did a 360"-Me, watching Nicole walk by a cute guy
"Man, if you go to Harvard I'm gonna beat you 'til you're normal."-Nicole
"Wide Load"-Nicole and Me
"The museum Nazi will eat you"-Eriner
"No sitting on the rock please!"-Security guard talking to Nicole
"It's sad that people throw things down there.....anyone got a penny?"-Kristin
"I don't want both your nuggets"-Erin to Lauren
"Dude, if you put me on camera I will tell you how much this museum sucks!"-Nicole to camera dude, guy answers back: "Thanks"
"Look Erin those cockroaches are glued to the paper"-Nicole
"Ha, that one fell off"-Erin
"Dude, that's a travelling Ramada Inn, oh wait, it's not moving"-Nicole
"Oh man, the bathroom melted all of my chocolate covered pretzels"-Diane
EVERYDAY QUOTES
Amanda: "Senora, last night I had a divine intervention and God told me that this
test has to be open book - and God doesn't lie."
Senora Braidotti: "Amanda...God lied."
Christine: "Katie V., did you read Don Quijote?"
*Kristin laughs hysterically*
Kristin: "I thought you said 'Donkey ho'..."
Kimmer: "Do you guys realize this song is about a THONG?!?!?!"
*Diane and Christine smile and nod*
*Kimmer sighs and shakes her head*
~last Padua dance, when "The Thong Song" was played
Kim D.: "I eat food."
Erin: "Really?!?! I eat garbage."
"Well, Mr. Stopyra, you should have said to her, 'I represent the Religion Department of Padua Academy. Now get the hell outta my spot!' "
~Bernadette, advising Mr. Stopyra on what to say to a woman in his parking spot
at school
"Je suis un pamplemousse japonaise"-I am the Japanese grapefruit, Lauren and Erin
"Spank your creamy monkey on your own time"-Erin!
"There's nothing about liquor in the bible"-Crispy
(high pitched scream)-Danielle hearing the words 'teletubbie' or 'Richard Simmons'
Who wants to go to the 'U room'?
The Log Song:
"What rolls down stairs alone or in pairs
rolls over your neighbor's dog?
What's great for a snack and fits on your back?
It's Log, Log, Log!
It's Log, Log, it's big, it's heavy, it's wood.
It's Log, Log, it's better than bad, it's good!
Everyone wants a log! You're gonna love it, Log!
Come on and get your log! Everyone needs a Log!"
"I don't literally pick up chunks of pumpkin and start a crunchin or anything"-Katie V
"I believe in...SHIT!!" ~Erin
"Maybe you couldn't hear me over my dolphins and friends..." ~Kimmer
"Suck MEEE..." ~Erin
"Oh goody, GAS!!" ~Erin, flipping through her chemistry book
"...Chocolate and dolphins don't mix." ~Kimmer
AND NOW, QUOTES FROM EXAM WEEK!
"I don't work the corner, I work the whole block"-Kelly R
"No, No, No, I am Crusty"-Kimmer
"I'm gonna ballet dance to Nine Inch Nails"-Kimmer
"Would you like a bite of my stick?"-Katie V
"awww, you broke my stick"-Danielle
"Speaking of things smiling at you, there was a happy mess of road kill on 95 this morning"-Lauren
"I need something uplifting" "Try wonder bra"-Erin and Diane
"You made them furry"-Erin
"Dingo has furry balls"-Katie V
"Field trip" (points to where the hot guys are)-Kimmer
QUOTES FROM OUTSIDE OF PADUA
"I will bite your limbs off"-Erin
"Florida is in my car"-Diane
"I just punched my car"-Diane
QUOTES FROM JUNE
"I'm a fat slut"- Evan G
"W's, I swear they look like W's, W's for Wilmington"-Brian K (in response to the fireworks)
"You smell like Kentucky fried penguin"-Daniel
"Go find a crack dealer"-Clark
THE BEST PIECE OF ADVICE ANYONE HAS EVER GIVEN ME
"I know that you have patience for the little kids, but you also need to remember to have patience for the big kids too, 'k? :) (warm smile of support and friendship)"-Mike Tipping, I love you man!
KATIE'S COMMENTS ON CHURCH
"And you just keep glancin over your shoulder and then turnin to the guy who's hand you have and sayin... i've got a 45 and a shovel no one will miss you KEEP SHAKIN!!!"-Katie V, commenting on avoiding the person next to you when dealing with the obligatory church handshake
"We're off to see the pope! the wonderful pope of rome!"-Katie V
"Follow the eucharist brick road... those things are like bricks man"-Katie again!
"It's like hey! could you please pass some christ? the christ is a little stale today!"-Katie
QUOTE FROM MY CONVERSATION WITH KATIE ABOUT HELL
"He's just going to sit in a corner and drool"-Kim talking to Katie about what would happen if a friend was sent to hell and his computer was taken away:)
QUOTE FROM HARE
"I have seen the glory of positivity and now i'm addicted"
QUOTES FROM A CONVERSATION WITH KATIE
"I cleaned the house damnit, someone's coming over!"-Kimmer
"Silly rabbit, Trix are for kids"
"Silly Kimmy, Trix are for kids"
"Coincidence, I think not!"-Katie V
"Someone took Twinkie the Kid!"-Katie
"I'm ashamed Kim"-Katie
"Why?"-Kimmer
"I'm stupid"-Katie
(rolls up to Burger King) "I'll have a Double Sigh with no cheese"-Katie V
QUOTES FROM A CONVO WITH MIKE R
"I bought things to stand up my thing"-Mike, not realizing how wrong that sounded
"She looks like a groundhog"-Mike referring to someone we know
"You're so angry"-Mike to Kim
