"COMPETITIVE SALARY"
They mean....
We remain competitive by paying less than our competitors.
"JOIN OUR FAST-PACED COMPANY"
They mean...
We have no time to train you.
"CASUAL WORK ATMOSPHERE"
They mean....
We don't pay enough to expect that you'll dress up.
"MUST BE DEADLINE-ORIENTED"
They mean.... You will be six months behind schedule on your first day.
"SOME OVERTIME REQUIRED"
They mean....
Some time each night and some time each weekend.
"DUTIES WILL VARY"
They mean....
Anyone in the office can boss you around.
"MUST HAVE AN EYE FOR DETAIL"
They mean....
We have no quality control.
"CAREER-MINDED"
They mean....
Female Applicants must be childless (and remain that way).
"APPLY IN PERSON"
They mean....
If you're old, fat or ugly you'll be told the position has been filled.
"NO PHONE CALLS PLEASE"
They mean....
We've filled the job; our call for resumes is just a legal formality.
"SEEKING CANDIDATES WITH A WIDE VARIETY OF EXPERIENCE"
They mean....
You'll need it to replace three people who just left.
"PROBLEM-SOLVING SKILLS A MUST"
They mean....
You're walking into a company in perpetual chaos.
"REQUIRES TEAM LEADERSHIP SKILLS"
They mean....
You'll have the responsibilities of a manager, without the pay or
respect.
"GOOD COMMUNICATION SKILLS"
They mean....
Management communicates, you listen, figure out what they want and do it.
This is so true