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Nick's-The Greatest Place on Earth

Best Plates

Nick Tahou's-Food at it's best. For any of you that don't know what Nick Tahou's (better known as Nick's) is, you need to get out more. Nick's, is simply the best restaurant in America. Where else can you get a burger, homefries, mac salad, and 'special sauce' all together on one plate in under 3 minutes?...with italian bread on the side. This mixture of food is known as a garbage plate. Mmmm, there's nothing better than a 93 gram of fat garbage plate.

Nothing beats Nick's. While most of you in the world may never have heard of Nick's, ask anyone from Rochester, and they'll be sure to tell you what it is...the greatest place on Earth. And it's not just Rochestarians that feel this way, check out these quotes from some other, more famous, people:

John Elway after winning the Super Bowl:
"I'm going to Nick's"

President Clinton in testimony about the Monica Lewinski affair:
"I didn't do anything wrong...what Monica and I shared was something special, something that you media folk are trying to tarnish as something forbidden and sinful. What we shared together was something sensual and sloppy. Now I ask you is there anything wrong with that? Hundreds of people every day do what Monica and I did just that once. Heck, some people even do it twice within the hour. Me personally, I don't know how they can hold up, but you should see some of those guys go at it...even the women go at it with a great ferocity. And no one consideres what they do wrong. So I ask you, friends, Americans, and fellow eaters, please don't be abhorred by what we did. In fact, next time I would hope that you would join us. And we can all share that same experience together as a nation."

Mr. President on the Starr report:
"The Starr report is just a bunch of lies. A cigar??? Come on, a man in my position using a cigar? Never...I am much more mature and sophisticated for something of that nature. Now I've stated time and time again that it's my private life. But for those of you who are interested, yes Monica rejected my privates and opted for something else instead...though it was not a cigar. Instead, it was one of Nick's world famous hots.

Mike Tyson after the Holyfield fight:
"Mmmmm, that ear tasted just like a plate"

Bob Dole after losing the election:
"Well, I guess this means I can spend more time at Nick's eating plates"

Dr. Jack Kevorkian on his new suicide technique:
"Okay everyone has been criticizing me for killing people before their 'time'. Apparently you all think this is immoral. Well, here's a new approach, and hopefully you'll see the beauty in this. While they still will die, they will go out happy, fulfilled, and in a euphoric state. All they need to do is go to Nick's and keep eating plate after plate after plate. Eventually the huge fat amounts consumed will kill them, though they won't feel a thing except for the wonderful aftertaste of plates."

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