67854569
November 10, 2005
#1: Break Up
As the women tries to speak with the man about a serious problem they are having which leads to her wanting to break up, the man just completely ignores her by not even looking at her. Then when she is looking for a response, his comment is rude, sarcastic, and ignores the topic of conversation. In The Relationship Cure by John M. Gottmanm Ph.D., he explains how this type of act is called turning against. It often involves a response to one's bid through sarcasm or ridicule. This type of action can easily diminish a relationship. Majority of relationships who interact in this manner end up splitting up. People all hold emotional needs that is required to be satisfied. When these needs are met through a negative response, we tend to shutdown and give up on expressing emotions, expecially for women. Instead we must turn towards each other be responding in a positive manner, which will lead to longer-lasting healthy relationships.
#2: Dog 
A man distracts a another man by complimenting his shirt; exclaiming how friggin awesome it is. Then as time passes by, he throws in the bad news of running over the guy's dog. The man was extrinsically motivated to compliment the guy's obviously plain shirt in order to give him a better mood, preparing him for the bad news. We are each intrinsically or extrinsically motivated to have certain actions. If this guy really felt that his shirt was "awesome" and thought the guy should know, he would be intrinsically motivated to compliment him without expecting anything in return. However, in this situation, he is extrinsically motivated through the need of decreasing the consequence of running over his dog.
#3: Interuptions 
A man and a woman is conversing when all of a sudden the woman interupts him only to wait in silence then give out a loud fart. The man returns her fart with a fart of his own. They say that compatibility is the most important thing in a relationship. Compatibility can come through the same hobbies, interests, personality, and even physical traits. It's a great feeling when you can share the same feelings of a certain topic and enjoy each others presence. However, compatibility isn't something you always have. It's something you make. It's a process, one that you negotiate as you go along, through time and constant willingness to work together.
#4: Cappuccino 
In this comic strip, the man is obviously the boss and is using his power in order to purposely act condescendingly and throw his cup of cappuccino at him. Men and women grow up in different worlds, according to Deborah Tannen in You Just Don't Understand. Women talk to each other for connection and intimacy, while men speak a language of status and independence. Younger boys tend to play games in large groups that are heirarchically structured. Status plays a key role in men's relationships. A boss being able to treat another person likes this, reminds a man that his future is in his boss' hands, which is showing a lower-status of power. This makes men intensely uncomfortable, which makes the seem a way of holding greater power within society, work, or even within his own family.
#5: Window Washer 
A man is working hard at his desk, as you also see the window washer behind him hard at work. The window washer sees the man put the paper in the wrong bin and is compelled to yell out "That doesn't go there" in order to correct him. In Deborah Tannen's You Just Don't Understand, there is a section in the book called I'll Fix You if it Kills You. It describes how men will do anything in order to demonstrate a certain skill. It explains how men feel honor-bound to fulfill the request for help whether or not it is convenient for them or to the person they are trying to help. This window-washer had no reason to correct this business worker, however, as a man, he is compelled to show a certain skill to prove himself. To men, it is a pleasant feeling of knowing more than another person.
All the comics were from the website: www.explosm.net
