Holy Evil backs Blade into the small ring's corner, and starts ramming his shoulder into the Sayvior's chest...</i>
Jim: Holy Evil must really be upset about Blade's attack earlier... This is an intensity that we haven't seen in a long time.
Chip: Actually, it could be that Blade spit on the UCE Universal Carnage Championship during thier confrontation. That probably lit a fire under him and every wrassler in the UCE.
Grimm: Well, that's career suicide for Blade! Everyone knows that UCE is the best fed in the business!
Holy Evil steps back to admire his work on Blade... Which obviously wasn't enough as Blade rushes out of the corner and clips HE's injured right knee. Holy Evil collapses, and Blade laughs.
Blade: Not so High and Mighty after all, are you!
Jim: And Blade starts to lay the boots on the Darkest of the Dark's chest...
Chip: Blade's a smart wrassler. Not only do most of his moves involve the knees, but with a bad leg to stand on, Holy Evil's going to have alot of trouble making his way out of this place.
Grimm: Which is why H.E. will look so damn good when he wins!
Jim: Hey! Both of you quit it! The match is still early!
Backing off of his booting, Blade allows Holy Evil the opprotunity to stand up. However, this opprotunity is brief, as the Sayvior sends Sanders over the top rope and to the stage with a running clothesline.
Jim: Holy Evil on the outside, attempting to stand... And Blade floors him with a beautiful flip over the top rope and to the floor!
Grimm: I hope he didn't hurt Sanders... if he were to seriously injure the UCE Champion here, Blade can kiss his National chances goodbye.
Jim: Oh please... The Nationals take people based on thier talent! If Blade's good enough to become National, he'll get called up.
Grimm: Do you know the Nationals? They're not filled with ordinary wrasslers. Nationals are filled with polititians! Why do you think that the Army of Darkness is always at top?
Chip: I don't know... maybe because they can wrassle!
Grimm: Do you believe yourself? The AoD has a cat as a member, and he's won several world championships! They're all polititians!
Back to the match people... Blade rises to his feet, and grabs Yoshito's hair. He drags him over to one of the large steel risers and smashes his face into it 3 times.
Jim: And Blade's turning Sander's face into a hammer!
Chip: Well, he's finally met the leader to a group that he feels is embarrassing to wrassling... It's pretty obvious that he's going to vent his fustrations out on him.
Jim: But to this extent?
Chip: Of course!
Blade smashes HE's face against the steel post one more time, and goes to look under the ring for more implements of destruction. Meanwhile, the Other Ones make thier way on stage for thier concert, bringing cheers from the Dead-heads and boos from the wrassling fans that can't see the action between Blade and Sanders. Bob Weir steps up to the mic...
Weir: Good evening Morriiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiisonnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnn!!!!!
That gets a huge pop out of the Dead-heads... Meanwhile, a bloody Holy Evil smashes Blade in the face with a Roaring Elbow as he turns around holding a trash-can lid.
Weir: Now, to all our fans... try and ignore the fight behind us! We got paid a ton of money because the Red Rocks was double booked... And for those that don't want to see the wrasslers behind us, we'll be holding another concert here tommorow night. Now, let's gets this show on the road!
Weir signals Bill Kreutzmann on drums, and the band starts playing Friend of the Devil...
Chip: I LOVE THIS SONG!!!
Jim: Pay attention to the match... if you can...
Whilst the band plays, Blade's arms are grabbed from behind as he stands, and Yoshito performs a picture perfect Tiger Suplex. Blade lands squarely on his neck, and looks to be out of it...
Grimm: You call that nice? Holy Evil's such a bad worker he couldn't protect Blade's neck in such a move! Why did he get a top spot if all he's going to do is injure the other wrasslers?
Chip: Grimm... Kayfabe, remember!
Grimm: I can't stand kayfabe! It's all a disgusting element of the past... people don't really care about kayfabe anymore!
The band plays on, and as they reach the chorus, Holy Evil slowly makes his way to the front of the stage. However, as he steps over the barrier, Blade tugs his hair again and pulls him back over to the stage side of the wall. The pair begin to start exchanging lefts, but Blade catches one of Evil's fists, spins, and sends him to the mat with an over the shoulder judo toss.
Chip: And Blade once again metaphroically slaps Yoshito Sanders in the face... This time, using a move from the Japanese Arts...
Jim: Holy Evil gets to his feet, and he doesn't look happy at all!
Through all the fighting, the Other Ones play on, starting up Mister Charlie. Meanwhile, the Sayvior smiles at Yoshito's anger, and challenges him to come forward. Yoshito charges, and is met head on by a mist full of beer that was spat at him by one Brian Blade.
Jim: And Blade does the patented mist in the face!
Chip: Hey! That's good beer he's wasting!
Grimm: It's probably only yellow water...
Sanders stumbles around blindly, and stumbles right into Blade's arms. Blade lifts Sanders high into the air with a vertical suplex, and then brings him down right on top of the gaurdrail... A series of pops are heard from Holy Evil's back as he screams in pain.
Jim: And what were you saying earlier about Holy Evil injuring Blade? It seems like the opposite just happened.
Grimm: No, he's perfectly fine! Blade's a good worker and always protects his opponents from career threatening injury.
Chip: Nice save...
Grimm: Don't you think so too?
Holy Evil slowly falls off the railing and to the stone floor, as Brian stands over him...
Blade: Legend my ass! You're nothing but a washed-up, talent-less, politiking bastard... You can't handle the future of wrassling, because that's me. And when I'm at the top, the AoD will be exactly what they deserve to be... They're not going to be in the Main Event, or even in the Mid-Card. They'll be at the bottom, where the freakshows should be...
Blade's remarks light a fire in Holy Evil, and he kips to his feet and rams Blade into the guardrail...
Jim: And Holy Evil's up with vengeance flaring in his eyes! He's got Blade's leg... FIGURE FOUR! He's got the figure four locked in!
Chip: I don't know what Blade said, but I bet he's regretting it right now.
Grimm: Oh please... don't you know this is a common spot in matches? Blade's going to incredibly reverse the move, and Holy Evil will break the hold to save his injured knee.
Well... To Grimm's non-surprise, after a few moments of screaming, Blade starts to turn himself over... Holy Evil struggles to keep the hold, but, eventually, Blade is successful, and Sanders quickly releases the hold before his leg is injured even further.
Grimm: Told you...
Jim: Regardless... Both men are to thier feet. Blade grabs Yoshito in a headlock... Wait! Yoshito throws him right into a giant speaker!
And not-so-coincidentally, the Other Ones hit one of thier super loud, super high notes as Blade hits the speaker...
Chip: Get that man some aspirin!
Jim: Blade staggers back from the massive sound blast... And walks right into a DDT!
The wrassling fans pop as Holy Evil drops Blade to the stone floor, and finally climbs over the guardrail...
Jim: And he's off the stage!
Chip: That's all well and good, but he's having a rough time making his way through the crowds in the first row...
That trouble allows Blade to roll to his feet. Seeing that his opponent is almost close to the entrance to the hallway to the exit, Blade runs and leaps over the guardrail and onto Holy Evil!
Jim: WHAT A MOVE!
Chip: I smell a lawsuit... a few fans got caught in that attack.
Grimm: Nah... The fans'll settle out of court. But, that move won't help Blade's popularity in the front office, that's for sure.
Blade starts to lay fists down on Holy Evil, who is on top of some fans. Security rushes in to at least get the pair off the fans, but Blade will have none of that and shoves security away. However, the respite in Blade's attack allows Holy Evil to grab a set of beads from a hippie's neck and start choking the life out of him.
Jim: And Holy Evil goes for the weaponry!
Chip: Poor hippies... they never get any luck.
Jim: Alrighty then, whatever. Blade's life is being choked away... wait! Blade rakes Holy Evil's eyes!
Holy Evil drops Blade, and Blade makes a mad dash for the exit... However, Yoshito Sanders grabs a beer bottle lying at his feet and flings it at the retreating Blade. Blade drops like a rock when the glass shatters all over him...
Jim: And Blade's out cold!
Holy Evil slowly makes his way towards the exit... He goes to open the doors, but they won't budge!
Jim: What's going on here?!?
The answer is quickly revealed as it seems Blade's nerdy assistant has barred the doorway with Holy Evil's limo... Yoshito turns to find another exit, and is smashed in the face with the Yoshito Sanders title.
Blade: All clear! Move the limo!
The assistant nods and turns on the car... After hearing that the car has driven off, Blade flicks off Holy Evil, opens the door, and steps through to win the match.
Jim: BLADE WINS... the bastard...
Grimm: Hurray for good booking!
Chip: Well... Yoshi looks like he needs to pay up!
Jim: As according to the pre-match stipulation, Holy Evil has given... $1 to the the United Way Association. The cheapskate...
Blade celebrates outside with his title as he drives off in Holy Evil's limo...
Chip: Well, I guess the limo's payment enough after all.