The Power Advantage DBZ RPG News Archives: July 2002

The light of the sun peered into the large windows of the chapel at 
2A as the warriors of Earth piled in to the cathedral to celebrate the joyous 
occasion.  The sense of glee and joy spread across the area.  However, this joy did 
not reach one room, where a certain part Saiyan stood, looking himself in the 
mirror.  His hands kept straightening his tie as a short red alien that had become 
his best man was pacing back and forth in the small room.  The now angered Jeice 
finally shattered the silence in the room.

"Why are you so nervous?! If you love her or whatever you shouldn't be so.. 
Would you listen to me and stop messing with your tie?!?!"

	His words didn't seem to reach Tobias though.  The part Saiyan merely 
continued fixing his tie as a thousand thoughts raced through his mind.  

'What if she runs? What if I run? What if she isn't happy with me?' "ACK!"

	Tobias found himself gasping for air as Jeice tightened the tie to the point 
of constriction.  

"Serves ya right for ignoring me!  Now are you going to calm down or do I have 
to hurt you?"

	Tobias clocked Jeice in the head and turned back to the mirror.  

"I still don't understand you humans and your need to marry.. I'd just take her for 
offspring then go back to fighting."

"Oh be quiet Oompa Loompa boy.. I don't need to be taking sass from you.. 
especially today!"

"You don't even know what sass is!.. and don't call me an Oompa Loompa! I'm 
not orange, I'm red!"

	Tobias had begun to ignore the short orange alien as he caught sight of the 
clock on the wall.  

'…not to much longer now..'

~~~

	Meanwhile, in another small room in the chapel, a group of women were 
preparing for the occasion in question.  Zonecop Selphie was standing in front of 
a mirror, her hands fidgeting at her sides as her Maid Of Honor, the Demoness 
Jasmine, was helping to place small flowers in Selphie's pink hair.  The blonde 
bombshell known to many as Android 18 sat in the back, examining her dress 
carefully as she seemed to dislike the white of the dress.  

"White is so tasteless.. couldn't we have worn something else?"

	Jasmine spun around to face 18.

"Would you stop it?  You'll just make Selphie nervous!"

"Excuse me but just who are you?"

"….Never mind.. just quit with the comments okay?"

	Jasmine returned to the task at hand, only to notice Selphie's legs shaking.  

"Selphie?"

	Jasmine moved in front of Selphie and looked at her face.  A blank stare 
was plastered on her face as she stared at herself in the mirror.

"..Selphie?  What's wrong?"

"Wh… what if he isn't happy with me?"

"Come on, Selphie.. Tobias loves you and you know he does.  Why do you think 
he would just suddenly change his mind?"

"What if he's only happy with my body… what if he sees someone more beautiful 
and decides he doesn't want me or….."

"So is Tobias really that bad a person?"

"N-no! Toby's a great person!  He's kind and gentle… and.."

"Then why are you lying to yourself? Do you honestly think that he'll leave you?"

	Android 18 decided this was a good time to throw in her two cents on the 
matter.

"You've been making Tobias seem as though he's something he obviously isn't.."  

Selphie stands there, shocked, unable to believe anyone would say something so 
cold. She sighed and turned back to the mirror, lost in thought.

~~~

	In a room behind the alter, a priest stands.  A bible rests in front of him as 
he reads out loud.  

"Do you, Wolfwood, take Wolfwood, to be your lawfully wedded wife?"

"I do."

"And do you Wolfwood, take Wolfwood to be your lawfully wedded husband?"

"I do."

"Okay that's enough practice.. I think I've got this down!"

	Wolfwood's two clones, 1 in a dress and the other in a tux, merge back 
into him as he fixes out his suit.  Evangelion Unit 01 sits in the background, 
chugging down a 6-pack of soda.  

"Why exactly are you chugging all that, EVA?"

	EVA belched loudly and turned towards the priest.

"Gotta have cans for the back of the car…."

"… You know if you would spend more time around girls you might not have 
such poor manners…."

	EVA lifted up a cow leg and devoured some of its flesh.  

"And if you used a razor you wouldn't always look like a bum.."

"Don't make me Kaistar you!"

"Don't make me force you into that dress!"

"…….."

"That's what I thought.."

	A silence fell over the room as Wolfwood turned back and lifted his Bible 
as EVA belched loudly again.

"Knock that off!"

~~~

	A large crowd, now assembled inside, was being led to their seats by 
Pardus and Nova.  Two androids were standing at the Music table as the 
Moonlight Sonata played over the speakers in X's chest.  Android 16 and X stood 
watching the audience pile in, 16 occasionally scoffing.

"I still don't know why Tobias has to get married.. That's why the world has 
strippers!"

	X sweat dropped, almost toppling him over.

"Is strippers your answer for everything?" 

"It's not the answer to everything… that's why there's hookers!"

	X sighed and returned to playing the music as the crowd began to take 
their appropriate seats.  The time was approaching for the wedding to begin, as 
the last minutes seemed to tick down.  Wolfwood walked out from a room down 
the hall and headed up to the alter, where he placed down his Bible and waited.  

~~~

	In a sudden moment of synchronization, a single thought passed through 
the bride and the groom.

'It's finally time..'

~~~

	A new tune began to play as Tobias walked down the aisle.  He was 
followed shortly after by the best man and the maid of honor, walking down the 
aisle and to their respected places.  The bride's maid, 18, came walking down the 
aisle, stopping next to Jasmine with a look of distaste at the tacky white dress.  
Goten came down the aisle, pulling an 'awwww' from the audience, as he held 
the rings.  Reno followed behind, scattering flowers as he went, pulling an 'uhhh' 
from the audience, except for 16 who mocked his friend with an 'awww'.  

"Why did I ever take this role?"

	Finally, as the group of people traveling down the aisle stopped, a silence 
fell over the group.  It was broken as a Bridal March began playing from X's 
sound system.  Tobias looked down the aisle, as Selphie appeared, standing next 
to Ramirez, walking down the way.  Tobias gulped, as her dress seemed to 
sparkle with radiance.  

'Oh man….'

	Selphie finally reached the alter, Ramirez taking a seat in the front row.  
Tobias blushed slightly as he was caught staring at her.  The two took their places 
in front of Wolfwood as he opened his Bible.  From up on the roof, Evangelion 
watched them through a hole in the ceiling.  He popped open another 6-pack of 
soda and toasted to the Lord before belching and continuing to view the events 
below him.  Wolfwood cleared his throat and began to speak to the assembled 
masses and the bride and groom.

"Dearly beloved. We are gathered here today because I am a card shark."

After saying this Wolfwood is struck by lightning. Apparently God wasn't happy 
with his intro. Wolfwood coughed and then started over

"Dearly beloved. We are gathered here today to unite these two in holy 
matrimony"

Wolfwood goes into a long speech about the wonders of God and love. However 
the audience was obviously not interested when Wolfwood noticed Chibi Goten 
yawning.

"Well……I guess I'll just skip to the good part since NONE OF YOU SEEM TO 
BE INTERESTED!"

Suddenly everyone sweat dropped

"Okay.. now I'm sure this is a first for all of us so let's hope for the best.  As this 
is a Rose Wedding, it's time for the exchange.  Tobias, if you'd be so kind as to 
begin."

	Tobias nods and turns towards Selphie, the hand holding the rose shaking.  
He extends his hand towards her as Selphie accepts the rose with a smile.  Selphie 
smiles brightly and extends her rose to Tobias, who accepts it nervously.  They 
both smile at each other and blush lightly as they turn back to Wolfwood.

"These roses symbolize your love.  As the years pass Tobias, Selphie, I expect the 
two of you, on the day of your anniversary, to exchange roses once again, to show 
the love between you will always be as bright and wonderful as the roses you 
hold.  When you two finally head out together into this world, remember the rose 
and what it represents.  Always hold your love and the rose together as you 
venture onward.  Now… the rings."

Wolfwood motions for the best man to bring forth the rings. Jeice moves forward 
with them and hands them to the priest and returns to his place. 

"These rings are a tradition in marriage. They symbolize the never-ending union 
that is a marriage. There perfect shape showing how a marriage must go full 
circle."

Wolfwood hands Tobias and Selphie the rings.

"Tobias. Place this ring on Selphie's finger and repeat after me: With this ring I 
do thee wed."

Tobias places the ring on Selphie and mimics Wolfwood's words.

"Selphie take this ring and place it on Tobias finger and repeat after me: With this 
ring I do de wed."

Selphie takes the ring and places it on Tobias and repeats after Wolfwood

"Should anyone have any reason why these two should not be wed, please speak 
now or forever hold your peace."

16 raises his hand and Wolfwood responds

"That doesn't have to do with Strippers"

16 lowers his hand

"Well then. With the power invested in me by the almighty god. I now pronounce 
you Husband and Wife. You may now kiss the bride"

	After a brief moment of nervousness shared between the newlyweds, they 
share a kiss.  From the hole in the ceiling, a pure white light beams down, 
engulfing the two.  As they bathe in the light, they wrap each other up and 
embrace.  

~~~

Some time later all the wedding guests and participants were at the wedding party. 
Podrin and Hoboman arguing over the drinks, X blasting techno music over his 
speakers. 16 going on about god knows what. Selphie and Tobias sitting at the 
table as Jeice stood up and began banging his glass

"Everyone sit down before I blast you all to bits!"

The party slowly slowed as everyone sat. Though few were scared of Jeice's 
threat

"Well as the best man I'm told I'm supposed to do a speech. I'm not the best 
speaker. So I'm just going to let someone else speak for me. So 16 please take it 
away"

Jeice sat down slowly. Everyone Eying 16 as he stood and cleared his throat

"Well, this wedding sure has been a while in the making. First, it's on for sure, 
then Evangelion quits on us, but I'm glad it's finally happening. I'm also quite 
content that we could all put aside our differences to celebrate such a joyous 
occasion, the union of Zonecop Selphie and Tobias." 
   
16 smiled at Tobias. 

"Hmmmm...What can I say about you, Tobias? You're a wonderful friend; I feel 
quite safe if you're in battle alongside me. You've been through a lot...killed by 
the Suncloaks in the last tournament, made a slave by Kanassans and 
Suncloaks...It looks like you're finally going to have your moment in the sun, and 
no one deserves it more." 

16 then looked to Selphie. 

"To be honest, I really don't know you that well, Selphie. It looks like I'll have to, 
though, because if that guy chose you to marry him, then you've got to be one 
amazing person." 
   
16 fiddled with his tie a little, forgetting for a moment that everyone's eyes were 
upon him. 

"Errr...sorry, never had to wear a suit before...Well, what else is there to say? 
Good luck, you two, I hope you have a great life together!" 

16 sat down slowly while everyone clapped. Next. Fenix's dead body came from 
seemingly no were. Standing with the help of strings, which were being controlled 
by Eva. Who oddly enough seemed to be drinking seltzer water

"Ahem...Tobias is a good and caring soul who would sacrifice himself for the 
lives of others.  He did so for me while facing Garlic Jr.  He protected me most of 
that long battle until he couldn't take another hit.  Although I don't know him that 
well in person...I know that he is a really good person and wouldn't let anything 
happen to Selphie.  Well that's all I've got to say. Thank you." 

Fenix then sat down as Eva finished his seltzer water.

~~~

After the dinner the couple prepared to leave for their honeymoon. Selphie 
quickly remembered she still had not yet thrown the bouquet. All the single girls 
who attended lined up. Kashini, Jasmine, and Lain all stood ready to catch it. 
Selphie tossed the bouquet over her head and into the crowd. After the vicious 
fray it was Lain who came up victorious with the bouquet. Jasmine looked upset 
and ran to her boyfriend Wolfwood for comfort. Kashini didn't seem to care much 
about anything. Selphie and Tobias then ran off to their hover car, Eva's soda 
cans tied to the back of it. They sped off happily as everyone waved as the sound 
of quick footsteps could be heard. As the couple flew into the horizon Rufus ran 
up to the wedding

"I WILL STOP THIS WEDDING!!! "

Everyone looked at him strangely till Gokan broke the silence "Umm. 
Rufus…..The wedding is over….You're too late"

Rufus then sweat dropped and face faulted as everyone chuckled at his 
misfortune.

"But I'm not," another voice added, and suddenly the entire area turned black.

A bright light suddenly appeared, and everyone could only stare up in horror as 
the huge energy blast fell upon them, scattering them, as well as destroying the 
church.

"Brolli! No!" Evangelion shouted, raising his blade as white wings burst from his 
back, before he leaped up to attack.

"I think not," Brolli said, before bursting into more energy, and flying eastwards.

Everybody was stunned, and unable to move, until someone brought up a very 
good point.

"Tobias and Selphie were going that way!"

With that, the fighters followed, the strongest heading out first, while the others 
would follow, later.