Things the DBZ characters will never say or do



Bulma: Ohhhhhh he’s so cute.... you just want to hug him and love him and squeeze him to pieces! (Elmyria animainics)

Goten: I don’t care if you’re my dad’s friend.... I’ll blast you for saying that....



Trunks: *singing* Bob the builder.... can he fix it...

Goten: *singing along* Bob the builder... yes he can...




Vegeta walks up to Goku’s house and pushes the bell.... and takes off giggling...

Goten opens the door and looks round.... Chi-chi sticks her head out...

Chi-chi: That’s the fifth time today...

Goten: I tell you mom is the evil aliens from the planet Anthraxs...



Bulma puts some food out for Vegeta and Goku to eat after the two have finished sparring.

Vegeta: Bulma can you pass the ketchup?

Goku: Oh wow I LOVE Bulma’s cooking even more than Chi-chi’s!!!




Goten: DEATH TO ALL HUMANS!!!!! Mwha-hahahahahahaha!!!! The WORLD IS MINE!!!!!!!

Trunks: Uh Goten you’re half human...

Goten: DEATH TO ALL FULL BLOODED HUMANS!!!!!

Trunks: Does that include you’re mom?

Goten: Yeah her cooking sucks....




Yamcha: Oh wow... I never knew Tien had such a cute butt...

Tien: What?

Yamcha: Nothing!

Tien: Hey Yamcha

Yamcha: What?

Tien: Do you think I should get an operation to remove this third eye?

Yamcha: Yeah you look like a freak.

Tien: I thought so.




Yamcha is motioning all the hormonal woman to stop mauling him...

Yamcha: I’m sorry ladies but I can’t love any of you...

Women: Awwwwwww.....

Yamcha: Truth is I’m in love with Puar...



Krillen: Hey Trunks, I have something to tell you.

Trunks: What?

Krillen: You’re adopted...

Trunks: Really?

Krillen: Yeah man I’m sorry.

Trunks: No don’t be... Hey Vegeta!!!!

Vegeta: What?!

Trunks: *blasts Vegeta to a crisp* I’ve always wanted to do that.

Krillen: Hey nice shot...

Trunks: So Krillen who’s my dad then?

Krillen: Goku.




Goten and Trunks are sparring with each other on the front of Chi-chi’s lawn.

Chi-Chi: *runs out* GOTEN!!!!

Goten: What?

Chi-chi: KILL HIM!!!!!




Adult Goten: *throws cellphone away* Well I won’t be needing that anymore.

Adult Trunks: Eh? Why?

Adult Goten: ‘Cause I’m in love with you man!!!

Adult Trunks: And I love you too man!!!



Freiza: *looking at his reflection (he’s in his final form on Namek)* Now why do I have to look so gay?



Doctor: Are you ready for this injection Goku?

Goku: Sure!! I like needles.




Goku: Chi-chi I’ve decided I’m going to stop saving the world and I want to be an accountant!

Chi-Chi: THERE IS NO WAY IN HELL MISTER YOU ARE GOING TO SAVE THE WORLD AND THAT’S FINAL!!!!

Goku: Huh?

Chi-chi: And be sure to keep Gohan away to save the world too... he’s doesn’t need to study. Education is not at all important.




Krillen: Thunder shock Picka-chu!!!

Gohan: pik-a pik-aaaa!! Chu!!!! *thunder shock attack*




Cell is in his final form ready to fight Mirai Trunks... Trunks gets a hit and knocks Cell in to a wall.

Trunks: It’s over Cell.

Cell: Indeed it is... I guess you won then.

Trunks: What? Just like that?

Cell: Well you’re so much stronger, and faster, and better than I am... I wish I had your body.

Trunks: Well yeah I mean after all you look like some sort of giant bug...

Cell: Say do you want to get together for a coffee and we can talk about the future?

Trunks: Coffee’s good.




Vegeta: You know I can’t be bothered with surpassing Kakarott anymore. I admit he’s just going to be stronger.

Bulma: Then what will you do?

Vegeta: I was thinking about a tv cook show...




17: Ohh look 18 pretty birds....

18: Pwetty...

16: *blasts the birds*




Mirai Trunks: *upon coming to the past* God what a dump! Why’d I even bother... my time is much better, there is more freedom there.

Goku: what about the heart virus I suffer?

Mirai Trunks: Bah who needs you my dad is stronger.