Mike's Page of Stuff

The Purpose of "Mike's Page of Stuff":

We at Mike's Page of Stuff have been working tirelessly to provide the readers of Mike's Page of Stuff with valuable stuff done by Mike. It's not confusing in actuality. It's really quite simple. Mike, or Kron, or any of his other aliases, is but a simple carpenter like our Lord Jesus Christ. So simple a carpenter is he that he does no carpenting. Mike's Page of Stuff can be likened to The Bible or How to Win Friends And Influence People in that it provides practical information for one's everyday life in a way that everyone can understand. I'm not sure why this introduction had so many allusions to religion and a fictional demon named Kron, and maybe I don't want to know. I'll just get right to the site, then.

From the Book of Kron:

Jealousy 4:63- And Kron wanted the bicycle that his friend Jimmy had gotten, and murdered him for it. It was the best bicycle ever, and he never got bored riding it. He never wanted anything else, and was always happy. It could easily be said that Kron's life started looking up after that.

Okay...

Enough of that quasi-satanic mumbo-jumbo, it's time to get down to business. Actually, truth be told, the book of Kron is a valuable resource which you can't pick up in any library (because it is not real) as soon as you are able to get past all the evil stuff.

Kron is actually a friendly demon with shady origins, but he is not the subject of this page, Mike is. It's his page of stuff. Keeping that in mind, Kron wishes you the best for your holiday season.

Okay, Seriously, What's the Point of this Page?

What's with the third degree? Okay, it's funny, cause I'm asking these questions of myself in hopes that you'll have the same questions to ask of me. If you don't, I'll just be talking to myself. I hope there's somebody out there to be asking these questions so I can answer them and not just waste my time entering incredibly random things into a little box at the Angelfire site (A little box 20 stories below the center of the earth, in a bunker).

Ok, I'll be honest, there are no questions, and that is the reason why there are no straight answers. The only third degree you'll get from this site are third degree burns, because it's going to be hot. You'll need to bundle up when you visit the page to be sure, and when it reaches that level, I'll inform you, so that you can observe the necessary safety precautions and note the exits.

Until then, this is Mike, from Page of Stuff, California, saying, "Farewell and Goodnight."

But wait, there's more! The first of many different sections to look at is featured below. You might not enjoy it, but it's worth a shot.

Mike's Page of Daily Insanity

And more still. I've decided to arbitrarily post things that I write on my site. That's right! Some of my very own stuff will go on this page! Why, you ask? You won't know unless you enter...

Mike's Page of Writing

I'm a poet and I didn't even know it! Okay, well, here's the deal with this page: I had some spare time in Creative Writing class and I wrote some jokingly pretentious but simultaneously very offensive poetry. The original nine are up, and there might be some more whenever I get around to putting them up. Only enter if you don't think anything at all will offend you, because I don't want to go through the trouble of making another page for hatemail.

A Little Poetry...

Here's an interesting idea. As the trend goes, the pages are becoming more and more specialized in terms of appeal. If you didn't "get" the poetry, you're not going to like this very much. But, if you're too curious to pass it up, enter and read further.

The "Expression Pages"

I've finally gotten around to adding a page for links. Very few, now, but it's growing.

The Links