Spambusters character action
Original thing being MiST'd
TITLE: Spambusters, Edition 3
AUTHOR: Robin Elizabeth
RATING: PG
DISTRIBUTION: none without prior consent (aka, gotta ask me first)
NOTES: non beta'd. written in about 1/2 hour.
DISCLAIMER: see Edition 1
SUMMARY: "I" along with the WWF's Shane McMahon, Sean O'Haire, Test and Chris Jericho MiST a piece of spam.
Body Wrap at Home to lose 6-20 inches in one hour.
Robin: It's called saran wrap.
Sean: That seems really uncomfortable.
Shane: So is reading about me giving SCSA a blowjob.
Test: I think I can speak for all of us when I say...Gross!
Sean: Did not need to know about that.
Robin: Shane, you now scare me.
With Bodywrap we guarantee:
Robin: We'll take all the money we can.
Test: This product will not do anything promised.
Sean: To prove that you're a gullible jackass.
Chris: We'll keep spamming you as long as you buy our stuff.
you'll lose 6-8 Inches in one hour
Robin: Like that's healthy.
Sean: I guess they don't think most of your internal organs are necessary to leading a healthy and productive life.
Shane: No one with a life would buy this.
Sean: Got a point there, boss.
100% Satisfaction or your money back
Shane: As soon as you find us again.
Chris: And whatever is returned will be resold to the next available idiot.
Sean: And God knows there are plenty of them out there.
Bodywrap is soothing formula that contours, cleanses and rejuvenates your body while reducing inches.
Robin: Formula?
Test: Special kind of plastic wrap?
Shane: Maybe it isn't anything external. Maybe it's a liquid.
Chris: Maybe it's a cream that goes on the body. After all, it does say that it contours, cleanses and rejuvenates.
Shane: So does a bad movie.
Robin: Like the Talented Mr. Ripley.
Sean: Still harping on that?
Robin: Yup.
For more information Click our link BodyWrap at Home
Robin: Aka. to get more spam, click...
Sean: What link?
ALL: Hmm....
Chris: It's missing.
Robin: It was an AOHell link. Doesn't show up here.
*** ***
Sean: Any more spam?
Shane: Don't encourage her.
Robin: ::glares at Shane:: No, Sean, not yet anyway. But if anyone has any good spam, they can send it my way.
Chris: Like you don't get enough of your own.
Robin: But most of it is either porno or just bad stuff.
Test: Porno? Can you forward those to me?
Robin: ::shakes her head:: I just delete those, Test.
TITLE: Spambusters, Edition 4
AUTHOR: Robin Elizabeth
RATING: PG
DISTRIBUTION: none without prior consent (aka, gotta ask me first)
NOTES: non beta'd. written in about 1/2 hour.
DISCLAIMER: see Edition 1
SUMMARY: "I" along with the WWF's Shane McMahon, Sean O'Haire, Test and Chris Jericho MiST a piece of spam.
Robin, Sean, Chris, Shane and Test are sitting around the computer (like usual). Sean's playing on the computer while the others chat amongst themselves.
Sean: Robin, you've got a lot of spam in your AOL inbox.
Robin: And what are you doing in my AOL inbox anyway, Mr. O'Haire?
Sean: Just...just checking on something. That's all. Not actually reading anything.
Robin: Then how would you know it's spam?
Sean: It says its from AOL, but it doesn't have that official AOL picture.
Robin: Open it and see what it is.
Below is the result of your form. It was submitted by (AOLBillingUpdate@aol.com) on Thursday, July 26, 2001 at 14:17:13
----------------------------------------------------
Robin: I didn't send in any form.
Sean: It says it was submitted by that AOL address.
Robin: But that's not me!
Shane: It's spam, Robin. Calm down.
Robin: I am calm.
Dear Member,
ALL: Yes???
It's been some time now and AOL is getting bigger and better everyday
Robin: Bigger? Yes.
Sean: Better? No.
Shane: They're trying to take over the world, I swear.
Chris: I would think it's Bill Gates whose trying to do that.
Test: Conspiracy?
to keep AOL as enjoyable and fun as we would like to, we have to collect our depts.
Test: Depts? Hell, I'm not much of a speller, but isn't it debts?
Shane: Yeah. Not very convincing spam.
Robin: It's supposed to be convincing?
While updating our last transaction, we failed to gain acceptance for the credit card which was used to make your account. Please use this time to goto our Secure Safe Web Transaction Form, and update your credit card information with a newer one.
Robin: So that we can use your credit card number to make charges that you didn't authorize. Thereby allowing us to buy whatever we want, and you pay for it!
Sean: Who gave her Jolt?
::Test, Shane and Chris look at each other::
Robin: No Jolt involved.
These charges will include your monthly America Online membership fees and also could include any fees or charges for usage, premium services, activities, and purchases made through, using or in conjunction with your AOL account by you or other authorized users.
Robin: And since you gave us the number, we become an authorized user!
Chris: I wonder if people buy into this?
Shane: Some do.
Robin: Yeah, probably the ones who shop at Pelton's 4 or 5 times a day.
Sean: That much?
Robin: Sad, but true.
***snip unimportant stuff***
Thanks again for making America Online the number one online service, we look forward to seeing you online.
Shane: Have you reported them yet?
Robin: Every time I get one of these bogus emails.
Sincerely,
Robin: I sincerely hope you don't expect my credit card number.
America Online
Payment Services
Peter White, Billing Department
Shane: Can we come up with a more generic name?
