Like most organizations, we require
order and discipline. Yes, we require
these, but we don't enforce the need for these.
Rather, we prefer to create rules that
we obey only if we choose to. Rules
and regs can be SOOOOO binding...
So, if every group must have its
commandments, let them be fun...

As of two slash twenty-two slash two thousand

Here we go:

• Morning heretofore begins at 11AM.
• Therefore, 6AM is Fun Time!!
• No lingerie at the Sacred JELLO Brothers Table (guys only).
• RBCs are always allowed.
• When a rule is made, the fists of the attending members must be slammed onto the Table.
• Happy Hour after Eight (especially at the casa de Jarrett).
• Every meeting, at least one rule must be created.
• All JELLO Brothers may do what they want, when they want, who they want, how they want, in what direction, and whatever speed and pressure desired.
• All JELLO Brothers are immune to the negative effects of Hellwater.
• The JELLO Duramus council will choose names, but are open to suggestions.
• No naked driving, especially on the freeway.
• No Hanson references, ever.
• No political correctness is allowed. It is also not appreciated.
• Scandals are highly respected among the JELLO Brothers, especiallt those involving casual sex.
• Any Hellwater-related curse will backfire upon the attempted cursor.
• A JELLO Brother doesn’t have to believe anything they read unless they want to, including this page.
• No cow mailboxes, ever.
• No permission slips are necessary for field trips.
• Offerings to the janitors are smiled upon.
• No eating urinal cakes. It’s just common sense. Not that the JELLO Brothers apply that very often either.
• Mr. Disney’s shirt is always considered a homosexual artifact.
• No talking smack about the JELLO Brothers.
• MYOB/BYOB: Mind Your Own Business/ Bring Your Own Beverage.
• No anal leakage.
• Any JELLO Brother drinking directly from a two-liter container without proper reasons (i.e. a lack of cups) will be subject to a beatdown.
• There is no connection between the JELLO Brothers and Dan’s World Domination Campaign.
• You can’t fall off the floor.
• If we forget about a holiday, especially Forgotten Holiday Observance Day, only Aggroman and (Not) the Atomic Playboy may bitch about it.
• Whenever you use the word "I," it should always be followed by the predicate "want you to."
• Whenever you use the word "to/too/two," it should always be followed by the predicate "check out my butt." This rule and the rule above are both easily employed. Ex. "I (want you to check out my butt) would like you to (check out my butt) meet me at two (check out my butt) o'clock, in front of Jim's house."
  
• No goat throwing, especially from the top of a church.