• The following is a request from the notorious Briggshead: "If you were a term paper; I'd be doing you on the table."
  • All in all a delightful quote; however, if I was an unoriginal, talentless bastard, I'd use this quote in my away message.
• "Nothing you could confess would ever make me love you less."
  • Clever rhyme, however, I can think of a few things a guy could confess to me that would make me not like him anymore. Perhaps, something like, "I was really born a woman; I steal your things to feed my coke addiction; I only ever dated you because my friends payed me a large amount saying I wouldn't date someone this ugly; I'm sleeping with your best friend/archnemesis/mother/dog/grandmother/father/priest/rabbi/professor..." and the like. So, I ask you, what kind of psycho could always love her man full-heartedly after any hypothetical confession?
• "If you live to be 100, I want to live to be 100 minus one day, so that I will never live a day without you."
  • This one is the EXTREME of stupidity. First of all, this would only work if the two people were born on the same day. If there is any age difference, months, years, decades, then two people won't be 100 at the same time... DUH! Didn't anyone ever think of that before reading the quote, taking a big, romantic sigh, and copying and pasting it? Furthermore, even if two people were born on the same day, and the one didn't want to live one day without the other, why would the person want to die one day before the other? If you die a day before someone else, then you're away from that person for that day. Say, "I want to die at the very same time that you die, so that we will never be apart." See, my quote is just as stupid and sappy, but logically correct.
• "You complete me."
  • UGH! This one makes my blood boil! What, are you saying that you are not a complete, holistic being without some stupid guy calling your cell phone, taking you out on shitty dates, and messing around with you!?!? Unless this quote is directed to a person's liver, spleen, heart, lungs, brain, or other vital organ, it is entirely false. Furthermore, it is sad that anyone would actually feel that they are incomplete without dating someone. Let me tell you, you are already as complete as you will ever need to be.
• "I am a princess, i live in tha clouds, if u wanna kick it wit me you betta bow down, so get on ur knees and call me ur highness, cuz baby belive it I'm [insert location here]'s finest..." [note: I started correcting the grammar and just gave up]
  • GRR! This one makes me so mad I don't even know where to begin! First of all, EVERYONE has heard this quote, so there's no way that anyone will associate the quote with you. Secondly, I've noticed a trend: most people who use this quote regularly definitely AREN'T the finest anything! I see this quote as no more than a feeble attempt at feigned, self-proclaimed greatness. Don't run around saying you're great: be great.

[more to come, i'm sure.]