Personally, I think the taboo that surrounds the female breasts is highly unnecessary. I, for one, think our society should aim for equality. I think we girls should be able to walk around shirtless just like a guy. I hate having white boobies. I would love to have them bronzed and tanned by the summer sun. But no. I can never simply be shirtless without all sorts of unwanted attention. I don't understand the hype. I mean, guys have boobies too; ours just are more likely to gain fat tissue and have milk glands and stuff. But no, if a girl wants attention, she shows her boobies. Guys give her attention because she shows her boobies. And other girls criticize her for showing her boobies. It's a vicious cycle and needs to stop.

But being as I see this cycle stopping the day that hell freezes over and Hitler goes ice- skating, all because the man says it's cool and rebellious girls to show off boobies, and for guys to scream and rave at boobies. So for now, ladies, I say take advantage of the system: Exploit your boobies! I often find myself using my boobies as a negotiation device. If I want something from a random guy, whether it is getting into a specific lane of traffic, getting truck drivers to honk their horns at me because I'm in competition with another car, seeing a guy's weird, inverted nipple, even getting a guy to put a Radiohead sticker on his cock (ooh boy, that was a hilarious one!), and they refuse, then I offer up the twins. It would be demeaning if I truly believed that girl's boobies were a private part of the body. It's not like I'm not whipping out my vagina and screaming "WHOO!! CHECK OUT THESE LIPS!" The reason boobies are supposedly innappropriate is simply because society has placed that notion into our heads, and it's stupid. Girls should have just as many rights as guys when it comes to what body parts are vulgar and which aren't.

I'm not saying that it's sexist for guys to like boobs. Not at all. That would be hypocritical, because I have definitely appreciated and even molested some mighty fine pecs in my time. I just think that if it's a hot day, a girl should have just as much freedom to take off her shirt as a guy, without all the "WOOOOOO"-ing from guys, and other girls thinking she's a whore.

We claim to be the land of the free, but we our not. Our boobies are oppressed. I want my children to live in a nation that no matter what the child's gender is, on a hot summer day, she can take off her shirt, and get a nice tan. If this could happen in our society, it would be a much better place. And I would have the sun-kissed boobies I have always dreamed of. Until then, I'll just keep my negotiation devices.

Maybe I shouldn't have told you people this, because now I will be forced into using my negotiation devices.

boys don't like girls, boys like boobs and pussy.