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4/16/04
Visiting Stan in Morrisville this weekend. Its been cool. We went bowling with a bunch of people last night and then came back to Stans room and played a little Hold Em and hung out. Good times. At least its finally nice out so we can be outside. ok thats enough for now cause I really don't know what else to say.

4/17/04
Still in Morrisville. Stayed up last night until around 7am screwin around on the internet and watchin Old School. (excellent movie by the way) Apparently theres a big party somewhere tonight. Not sure if we'll be going or not, but either way, its cool.

4/18/04
Once again, still in Morrisville with Stan. We ended up going to Campus Hill last night for a party with Amanda, Chris, Fro, and Mike. It was pretty cool right up until things got a little dramatic, but even then, it was still alright. Played a little "water pong" and some cards. We didn't end up going to sleep until around 5:30 this morning and slept in until around 5pm!! Wasted a lot of the day but its cool. Anyway, we got up got showered and stuff and went to eat at Seneca (ice-cream too!!). After we ate we went to rent a movie (Kangaroo Jack)(2 very enthusiastic thumbs up) and watched it. Since my car needed to be parked in the cage, we decided to stop and get some free pizza (Go NY Pizzeria!) for some energy for the walk back to South. Which brings us to now. So thats about it for today. C ya!

4/19/04
Its around 11pm and I just woke up from a 4 hour nap. Only got about 3 hours of sleep last night, woke up at 7:30, walked to the cage to get my car, drove back to Hornell, worked 11:30-5, came home, passed out on the couch. That pretty well sums up my day. Nice huh? I don't have to work tomorrow but I'm hoping to get called in. I could definitely use the hours and the money. Catch ya later.

4/22/04
Pretty much an average day. Woke up late, went to work, worked my ass off because for some reason we were getting our butts kicked all day. Got out of work a bit late. Came home, ate, lounged, watched Friends and here I am. I just want to tell everyone, that if you're so miserable with your job that you bitch at everyone, co-workers and customers, quit. Find something you like better. Noone wants to put up with that shit. I just found out that my cousin TJ is having a baby!! Her shower is next weekend. Thats all I've got for today.

4/25/04
Its a nice lazy Sunday night. Worked all afternoon, but it was a pretty easy day. I had a lot of completely random conversations today. I think its a sign. I don't know what kind, but definitely a sign of some sort. I work all week, Mon: 9:30-2:30 Tues: 1:00-6:00 Wed: 12:00-4:00 and Thurs: 11:30-3:30. Should be a good week though cause I get to go see Stanley on Thursday!!! Its also supposed to stop raining sometime around Thursday or Friday so I'm looking forward to that as well. Kind of getting sick of the rain.. it makes everyone all cranky, and many people suffer from bad hair days from it as well. Anywho, its time to go watch TV and relax for a bit before bed. Have a good week!!

4/28/04
Its around 1:30am and I'm sooo tired but I really don't want to go to bed because I wanna stay up and talk to Stan some more. Now don't ask me what I'm doing writing this instead of talking to him, cause I have no idea. I get to go see him in 2 days! I'm pretty excited. Its been 2 weeks since I've seen him! I can tell he misses me too. Know why? He said so! Work has been alright so far this week. Not bad at all. Hung out with Halla Monday night. Went to Old Navy and what not then stopped and got icecream! (YUM YUM!) OK time to talk to Stan and go to bed. Later!!

5/01/04
Good Morning! Its 10:30 am on a Saturday and I have NO IDEA why I'm awake. Andy called a while ago but normally I would have just gone back to sleep. Guess maybe I wanted to enjoy the weather a bit. Its been sooo nice outside the last couple days its been great! Supposed to be around 75 degrees today! WOOHOO! Think I'm going to go hang out at Andy's for a while today while Stan's at his RA meeting and work. Guess I don't really know why I'm staying since I'll be alone from 1pm till 2am, but hey ya know.. thats the way it crumbles. I'm sure I'll be happy I did. ANYWAY.. Today is my cousin TJ's baby shower. Moms going but I decided I'd just stay here. That gives me all day tomorrow to be with Stan cause as far as I know hes got nothing going on tomorrow. Ok, I think I'm going to get in the shower and get around for the day. 30% chance of rain today so I want to make sure I get outside now incase it does rain later. Catch ya later!

5/09/04
I know I haven't been doing very well keepin you posted these days.... but anywho. Been pretty busy lately. Tray's home from school and so is almost everyone else, and I've been working almost every day (even on weekends!) trying to get my money back on track. Doesn't seem to be going as well as I had hoped. Tuesday JoLynn has an interview at Wal-Mart so I'm going to head up with her and stop over at the temp agency to see if they can hook me up with anything. I could probably get more hours at Wegmans, but I really can't see myself standing at a register for any more than 5 or 6 days a week. I don't really know what my problem has been lately but it seems that all I care to do is go to work and come home. My social life has pretty well gone down the tube lately because it seems like I'm tired all the time. Alright.. I guess thats enough of my crap for you to hear for one day.. C ya.

5/12/04
I guess I had an alright day today. Spent most of the day with Tray. Came home, spent a couple hours mowing the lawn and thinking. A lot about Stan, summer and my friends. All of those should be really happy thoughts, yet I found myself almost crying. Don't get me wrong, I'm literally counting down the days until I can see Stan again and I know it will be so much easier for us to see eachother when he comes home. For some reason though, I have a really bad feeling about how my summer is going to turn out. I'd like to think its going to be one of the best, but I can't help thinking it probably won't be for some reason. No idea why. Then I got thinking about a certain friend of mine. I wish things were different for her. 90% of the time it seems that she doesn't even know whats going on inside her head and it kills me to see her potentially screwing things up for herself. I don't even really think I can trust her anymore. Not with anything. I guess I just wish she'd go back to the way she used to be. I miss her.
Anyway, Stan will be home in less than a week! YAY! I'm really hoping he gets a job at Wegmans. That would be great! I'm hoping this will be a good summer for us. Theres no reason for it not to be. Anyway, I'm gonna get ready for bed so I'll c-ya!

5/14/04
Its a Friday night and I'm sitting home.. Huh.. go figure. Oh well, its ok. I have no money to spend and gas is over $2 a gallon so I can't really afford go to anywhere. Anyway.. Stan will me home Tuesday night! YAY! I think his last final gets done around 8 so he'll probably be home around midnight. I'm pretty excited! Also, as it turns out, I have Wednesday off! I know he'll want to spend some time with his family and stuff, but thats alright.. Maybe I can steal him for some lunch or go for a walk or something. I know if I were him I'd want to spend some time with the family. I'm a little nervous about him bein home over the summer though. I'm just really afraid somethings going to go terribly wrong. I don't know why I have that feeling. I'm sure I'm imagining things and it will be great!
I've beenworkin a lot lately which I guess is good but I'm really getting sick of standing at a register 6 days a week. I need the money though so I guess I'm not going to complain too much. At least I'm working outside tomorrow so it will break up the monotony of being on register. Hopin for a good tan. If I have to be outside pushin carts for 6 hours it will be nice to at least get some color out of it. Prehaps a nice farmers tan. YEEHAW! Jasper style. I'm supposed to be hangin out with Tray tomorrow night. Which should be fun. I guess we've got a date to go to the Texas for some late night munchies. Ok I guess thats enough blubber for tonight. I've got some laundry to do so.. Catch ya!

5/16/04
Good Morning! Its 11am and I'm awake! Nuts huh? I thought so. I don't even really know why I'm awake. I didn't sleep as much as I usually would have. I figured I'd make today a 100% lazy day. I really wish I knew why my brain has been on overdrive lately. I've just been thinking a lot and questioning a lot of things. Even noticing things I've never noticed before. Like I have a certain few friends that I've really sort of admired. They're friends with everyone, people that me, coming from Jasper, (I hate to say it) but honestly probably wouldn't have even given them a chance. But then at the same time I've noticed they're kind of selective. Like for 2 or 3 days I'll be their best friend.. Then, I don't hear from them for a week and they avoid me like the plague. I guess its just one of the things I'll never understand. I get to see Stan in 3 days!! YAY! I guess I wasn't in the really talkative mood I thought I was so I guess I'm gonna go for now. TTFN!!

5/20/04
Ok so today was just a shitty day. I guess I'll spare you the details but it really sucked. Didn't I tell you the summer was going to suck for me? Damn I'm good. So that leaves me having absolutely no positive thoughts toward the rest of the summer... I'm just supposed to hang around and wait and pretend I'm happy about everything thats going on even when I couldn't possibly be much more miserable. So basically it boils down to it SUCKS TO BE ME! But its great for other people around me cause they know I'm a huge pushover and I'll agree to whatever makes them happy.

5/24/04
Hello. Ok things haven't gotten much better since the last time I wrote. I just have gone back to the trying not to think about how much I hate everything and pretending to be completely happy with the decisions others have made for me. So I guess you could say I'm back to the happy-go-lucky Jen. Whatever that means. The sad thing is.. it would only take a tiny bit of effort from one person to make me 20times happier. GoodNight