Does God Have Nipples???
Phillosophy can be very interesting, today im going to answer a question that has plagued mankind since the begining of time. Does God have nipples?
First of all i decided it was important to get the public opinion so i could write an informed report.
To start with i asked the question "does god have nipples?" to everyone i could find, (this wasnt very many people because i wasnt prepared to leave my seat as i couldnt be arsed) the general response was firstly shock then the look that says what the hell are you taking. Eventually people realised i wouldnt leave them alone unless they answered the question. the first peroson i asked was steve (aka rent a friend) he said "No!" in his usual idiot way. obviously he wasnt taking me very seriously. so i asked josh who provided me with this little nugget of information, "Erm i dont realy know, i dont have an opinion yet". Dave simply said "i don't care!" Thats great dave everyones entitled to their own opinion no matter how shitty it is. Things were still going slow, if i had stopped aking people now i would have had to call it a day and conclude people are just stupid, and thats that. but Gary (aka D.J lock to the little kids who follow him around) Provided this insightful insight, "i dont give a toss realy" . Clearly this was a bad idea i should never have bothered, but eddi got my hopes up again, he enthusiasticly yelled "yes" but unfortunately he resued to elaborate. He must be a great wealth of knowledge but he fears to share his knowlege, perhaps he hopes keeping it to himself will give him a competitive edge. He doesnt have much else going for him except that steve like to ride him like a pony.
Colin also said yes and he was willing to share his knowledge, " God has nipples because man has nipples and man is in Gods image" very interesting but unfortunalty i had allready thought of that so nothing new learned here. Andy (aka Arnie) Said "im just a deformed woman" look him up in the picture gallery and you will see what he means. but perhaps he was refering to the idea that men are simply geneticly mutated women a bit like what happend to that guy who became the increadible hulk. Abbi who seems to have missed the whole point of the discussion entirely yells out "women came first!" perhaps she is feeling represed and is crying out for help, i dont realy understand that sort of thing though and it has nothing to do with this discussion so ill leave it at that for now.
Allison was slightly closer to the topic at hand when she said "i like nipples they are nice" perhaps another cry for help or signs of mild insainty. Joe then said "yes he does! i know because i asked him." i dont know how he managed this but he is not one to lie so ill have to take his word for it. it seemed i now had conclusive proof that god does infact have nipples but people still felt they had to contribute something, Kate said "well why not you have to believe in something" this was shortly followed by colin yelling "I Believe!!!, Perhaps stars are gods nipples!" Later on when i asked ken for his veiws he said " Why not, Where do you think rain comes from? and snow?" Liz then enquired "what happens when he poos". ken then choked on his appled and spluttered "motherfucker" he then went on to discuss how his family tree doesnt fork and started to spout a whole load of crap, the best of which i have given its on web page.
So in conclusion i can deduce that my friends are generally complete bloody idots and that God probably does have nipples, after all Jesus had nipples and he was Gods son so where else would he get them from?
