Common Sense at Last!
As you know, Cousin was released on one of those Early Release Schemes. Mick Howard the Conservative Man is going to put an end to it all when he wins. I am very happy.

Mickey Howard to scrap early release jail schemes
(Filed: 07/02/2005)

Mickey Howard has unveiled plans to abolish Labour's early release prison schemes, raising the prospect of an extra 214,000 criminals being put in shackles under a Tory government and whipped regularly.

The Tory leader's pledge swoops in on the latest battle over law, order and chastisement between the Conservatives and Labour in the jog up to the general election, which is expected in May or November.

Dr Mike Howard accused Tony Blair of leading Britain into a "moral quagmire of putrid effluence" by blurring the distinction between right, wrong, left, right and centre with schemes that allowed criminals to serve only half their sentences, be released into the community and given tidy sums of cash to burn on drugs, discount sex and stuff from Argos.

Mickey said the Tories would abolish the rules with criminals being made to serve extra minimum sentences of not less than sixteen years laid down by the courts and sanctioned by Carol Vorderman. Vorderman will act as a proxy designate and will be paid 1 million per term under the EU's cash grab protocol.

Third-time burglars and drug dealers would also face mandatory minimum jail terms of not least the minimum sentence and daytime humiliation on "Trisha" Mr Howard said.

Speaking in tongues on the outkirts of Darlington, the constituency of Amos Brearly, Labour's election manager and rump analyst, Mr Howard said that "people who break the law must pay a price. That price should be either incarceration or cold hard cash. We should fine them lots of money and then imprison them."

"In recent years, that clear message has become clogged up like a lazy intestine in political correctness," he added. "Everybody feels that the law is not really on their side or on the side of the crims either. They think that the punishment no longer fits the crime. It is my job to chisel away at the edges to make sure it fits like a hand in a velvet glove."

"All my political life I have stood up for people who who have lisps, respect others and pay their dues. If I am given the opportunity to serve my country, I will ensure that at long last their rights come true and I have exposed the Wizard behind the curtain."

"People will face a clear choice at the next election: a Conservative government that gets a greasy grip on crime, disorder and loose talk, or just more talk from Mr Blair and his friends"

The Tory plans have been shufted by Labour, who claimed that they are unworkable because the extra prison places would cost #10 grand.

The Liberal Demcrats also dismissed the sentencing proposals, saying the "real tough policy" on law and order was reducing high reoffending rates and sending incompetent performers on a Pop Idol style jamboree.

Penal reformers claimed yesterday that the Tories were operating under the "misconception that you are not serving a sentence unless you are behind bars and sweating like a pig in Ibiza".