Well I am not really sure how to talk to you. I never get to talk to you much. Still Iam glad of the little time that I do get. I know that you said that you would not even get to call me at all. I want more than anything else than just to call you. But I know that I can't. I know that would only make things harder on you, and that is the last thing that I want. I really just want to know what's going on. I have a little information to go on, but sometimes a little information is worse cause it makes you think. Here is the only information that I have to go on.

* You said that you had the worse fight since you were in Germany.

* You said you almost lost your marriage.

* GB said that "someone" told Ron that I was staying at your house and that was what started the fight.

* And that you told me that one of his friends told him we were having Sex.

Please understand why I am going so nutz without you. I have told you that you are like the Sun in my world. Everything I do, I do because of you. You are what tells me to its time to get up in the morning and the reason I go to bed at night. Talking to you during the day is what helps me make it through the day. You are what keeps me wanting to take that next breath knowing that there is some light and goodness in this world. So when you are not there my world tips off of its axis. My world drifts off into space into the dark and cold. So when you tell me not to worry about what is wrong with you... My whole universe.... it is impossible. You are in my thoughts every minute of the day. I know it is difficult for you to talk to me , but if at all possible please find a way. find some time to get a message to me and let me know that WE are going to be ok. Right now I am wandering in the dark with nothing to light my way except for the soft glow given off by the ring on my Finger that says HAPPINESS. This is better than total darkness. It is enough to let me know I am still alive. enough for me to keep moving on, But not enough for me to see where I am going. Without you I am lost and wandering.

I MISS YOU

I LOVE YOU

I STILL HAVE

FAITH HOPE AND LOVE