CHAPTER 4

Later that afternoon in the hallway leading to the shops, Dale and Michael stood staring at each other, silence and tension building a wall taller than either man between them. Dale didn’t notice Michael staring at the purple marks on his neck he was obviously trying to hide. "You know I, well, I had better get to the office." Michael finally just blurted out.

"Yeah, ok." Dale’s head screamed for him stop him don’t let him just walk away like this. ‘Talk to him.’ What if he had chosen Steve? "Whatever." Dale didn’t give Michael time to speak he turned and stormed down the hall towards his shop.

Michael took a deep breath and sighed, he couldn‘t let it go like this. He followed Dale down the hall but stopped just outside the door. "Wow, now those are some major hickey’s. Good night I take it?" Pops asked, he knew Michael hadn’t shown up at the party and that left Kortni to have done the damage. He smiled, everything was falling into place perfectly.

"I don‘t want to talk about it."

"Now that doesn’t sound like a guy who got lucky last night. So how was she?"

Michael heard all he needed and he didn’t want to hear the details, he quietly made his way back down the hall and out to his car.

"I said leave me the fuck alone." Tony Jr. just watched as Dale threw the wrench in his hand across the room shattering the shop window then stormed out the door not looking back. This wasn’t working, things were going wrong, horribly wrong.

Tony Jr. watched as his cousin’s mood sank lower and lower until it became virtually impossible to talk to him let alone work with him. Michael and Dale didn’t see much of each other over the next few weeks and it showed in Dale’s attitude and performance. Neither man knew what the other was thinking or feeling and pride was quickly winning. Michael was hurt over Dale’s comments during a press conference about him not working for DEI past the season if his performance didn’t improve. He knew Dale had become Teresa and Tony’s puppet and could probably be talked into saying just about anything at this point and time but it hurt none the less. Ignoring each other wasn’t working and Michael knew they had to fix them, or end them. He finally decided to confront Dale.

"What’s going on June?"

"With what?" Dale asked knowing he sounded stupid.

"Dale."

"I think we have to do what is best for the business."

"Dale? Do you really believe that? That my being gone would be best for the company." Michael asked shocked.

Dale’s head screamed, tell him no, tell him you love him, tell him you’re sorry. "What? What Michael? What do you want me to say?" His voice raised defensively.

Michael stared at Dale. "Nothing. I think you‘ve said it all." He whispered. "I think we should, maybe, not see each other or, well I don’t know, Dale?" Michael did his best to keep it together and not break down in front of him.

Dale looked at Mikey. This hurt but he wasn’t about to show it if Michael wasn’t. After all he wasn’t the only one to have messed up. Michael had turned to Steve and maybe this was for the best. "Yeah, maybe you’re right."

Michael couldn’t believe what he was hearing. He thought for sure Dale would try to fight him or maybe he just hoped he would. "Well, then I guess, I’ll…um, well, bye."

Michael had to get out of there he wasn’t about to break down in front of Dale, not now. Michael closed the door behind him as quickly as he could. He couldn’t believe this, this wasn’t suppose to happen. Tony wasn’t ever suppose to win.

Dale walked to the closed door, he wanted to stop him but he obviously wanted out. "Don’t do this Dale go get him." He silently told himself but his pride wouldn’t allow it. He heard Michael’s car start and put his hand on the doorknob. "Shit. This wasn’t suppose to happen. Instead of opening the door he slid to the floor and leaned against it wondering how this all had gone so wrong.

The next few weeks were hard on both men although neither would show it. Dale had become a puppet for DEI, spitting out uncalled for comments at the most inappropriate times and he knew it, he just felt helpless to stop it. He had a hard time finding reasons to keep getting out of bed every morning. His world had spun completely out of his control, his mind was on Michael more than it wasn’t and the only thing it seemed that kept him sane was how close he had become to Martin and how successful the Chance 2 team had become. They were in contention for a championship and Dale had thrown himself whole heartedly into running that company and trying to hold onto his own points lead.

Which was something that hadn’t gone unnoticed by Michael. He couldn’t believe that he hadn’t noticed how close Martin and Dale were before now. He wondered if Dale was moving on. Maybe Martin was the reason he hadn’t fought him. He had only spoken a few words about the cars to Dale in the past several weeks and it was killing him to not be with him.

Tony Jr. watched as Dale packed a few things and threw them in a bag. "Look all I’m saying is…"

"Don’t. You’ve done enough. I don’t care what you have to say about it now. It’s too damn late." He threw the bag over his shoulder. "I’ve got a plane to catch."

"Dale." Tony followed him out the door. "Dale please." Dale stopped but never said a thing. "Just be careful please." Dale met his stare and then turned and disappeared out the door. Tony had a bad feeling about this trip. Dale’s mind wasn’t on racing, his head wasn’t in the game, he shouldn’t even be going. Tony was beginning to realize they may have done more damage than good.

CHAPTER 5

Four Days Later……

Michael picked up the phone on the 3rd ring. "Yeah." There was a pause. "Hello?"

"Mike, it’s Kelly. Are you heading to Sonoma?"

He heard the tears in her voice. "Sonoma? Why would I…" Wait, Dale was in Sonoma but Kelly knew they weren’t seeing each other. Michael’s head screamed, something had happened. "Kelly, what is it?"

"You…Oh God you really don’t know."

He could hear the fear in her voice grow and knew something horrible had to have happened. "Kelly, you’re scaring me."

"There was a wreck this morning, practice for the race. It’s all over the tv." She started crying again.

Michael quickly flipped the tv on and watched as a figure fell from the window of the car and a safety worker carried him away. He shook his head, it couldn’t be. The clip started to replay and Michael watched as the car hit the barrier in the turn, everything seemed ok for a second then much to his horror he saw the car explode into a burning inferno. He wasn’t getting out, the flames were all over him and he wasn’t getting out. "Oh God." The tears sprung to his eyes as the reality of what could be hit him. "Kelly is he…" He couldn’t say it.

"He’s alive but it’s bad Mike." She paused trying to get her own emotions under wraps. "Mom and I are flying out in 20 minutes." Silence. Michael was watching his friend, teammate, his lover slowly burn. "Michael?"

"I’ll be there."

"Look Mikey, I know you’re worried about him but we all are, I don’t understand the urgency to see him. Kelly can call and let you know what’s going on." DW paused. "I mean hell with everything that kid has said about you this year how can you run out there to help him."

Michael sighed. "You don’t understand Darryll. I have to see him, please tell me you’ll watch the girls and I’ll explain everything when I get back. Please."

DW thought it was odd but he couldn’t turn him down. "Of course we’ll watch them."

"Thanks bro. I’ll call you when I get home."

He made his way up the elevator to the burn floor. His hands were sweating, he wasn’t sure Dale would even want to see him but he had to be there, be near him. He entered the waiting room and Brenda and Kelly both stood and hugged him trying to make him feel a little more comfortable but he was met by a glare from Tony Sr. "What the hell you doing here? You aren’t a part of his life anymore."

Michael took a deep breath, maybe he should wait elsewhere. "Shut up Tony." Brenda said pulling Michael to a seat next to her. "He has just as much right to be here as you."

Tony muttered something under his breath but became quiet after that. "How is he?" Michael asked quietly.

"The doctors have been in with him most of the morning so we aren’t to sure yet. They are trying to determine how bad the burns are. His legs took the worst of the heat, they are saying they are probably third degree."

They had sat in silence for several minutes when Tony spoke up again. "Anyone call Kortni?"

Michael took a deep breath and looked to the ground. "They aren’t together and you know it." Kelly said obviously irritated.

"What, this just might get them back together." He smirked.

"Give it up Tony, he doesn’t want to be with Kortni, you’d know that if you’d pull your head out of your ass for two seconds and…" Jade stood finally having enough. Tony jumped up in Jade’s face and the two proceeded to yell at each other causing quite a scene in the waiting area, and as the two men were about to come to blows Brenda stepped in between them.

"I’m about sick of this shit. This stops now. Damn it he’s your nephew, how can you do this to him? Lay all this on him." Brenda was crying now. "God, that boy has hurt so badly since his daddy died. I know Dale and I had our differences towards the end of our relationship and Dale Jr. and I lost touch for so many years; but I never stopped loving my baby and I never forget how bad he needs his daddy, still to this day. This man is the only person, male or female that has helped him and made him feel whole again." She pointed to Michael. "No, I can’t say this is what I saw for my little boy but things happen and I love him no matter what and if he makes him happy, so be it. It’s worth it and I don’t care what any of you or the press has to say about it. I won’t let any of you destroy him. You don’t think I know about where Kortni came from, whose idea it was?" She glared at Tony Sr.

Tony started to speak when Tony Jr. interrupted. "She’s right pops, this has gone too far."

"You hate them together as much as I do." Pops yelled pointing at Michael.

"Yes I do, but I love Dale Jr. like a brother and he’s been miserable lately and you don’t seem to care. He almost died today, damn it. This hasn’t been about them for along time it’s about you and your own moral issues. Hell, this whole accident is probably partially your fault. You really think his mind was on the race?"

Pops quickly forgot about Jade as he stepped up in his son’s face. His face was red and he looked as though he could kill Tony Jr. Suddenly, Teresa whom had sat quietly in the corner, stood. She walked to Michael stepping between and separating father and son as she did so. She looked down at Michael, tears glistening in her eyes. "I’m so sorry." Michael looked up at her not sure he was hearing her correctly. "Since I got the call this morning I have thought of nothing but Dale’s funeral, burying him and how quickly life can change. Today we came so close to burying Junior next to his father. I’ve been so horrible to you, to both of you. I don’t blame either of you for hating me. I’m just so sorry."

"You owe him that apology." Michael said coldly.

"I owe you both, he won’t see me, I tried. I have to hope you will tell him for me." She turned to Brenda. "I know he’s your son but you have to believe that I love him like my own. I know he and I never were that close as the kids were growing up but I do love him, both of you." She said looking to Kelly. "They are right Tony this ends, right here right now. He can’t go on like this, none of us can, I won‘t lose another one of them. I’m not asking you to like it but deal with it."

"Or what?" Tony asked irate that Teresa had given in.

She walked to the door and stopped not turning. "Or find a new job." She began walking again when Michael stood.

"I forgive you, so will he." He walked towards her. "You know my first career win will forever be tainted with my best friends death, I miss him everyday. You don’t think I haven’t thought over and over in my mind as to what he would say about me and June? I have, repeatedly, and the fact is June and I wouldn’t have ever been together had Dale not died that day. He was blocking for us, for me, so I could get my first win, if I don’t keep telling myself that at least something good came of it," He paused. "I don’t know what I’d do." He stopped taking a deep breath almost unsure if he should continue, he couldn’t stop now. "But what’s worse, are the days that I start to wonder, if given the opportunity to bring him back for just one day; could I give up June and all we have shared." He pointed toward Dale’s door. "How the hell can I be happy if I have to choose between my lover and my best friend, who are father and son but how fucking selfish can I be that I couldn’t give up my happiness so he could have him back? How do I make that choice? Huh, Tony you want to fucking tell me how to make that choice." He turned yelling at Pops.

"Oh God." Kelly whispered. She couldn’t believe the pressure this man had put on himself continually over the years. The hell he had put himself through, he had blamed himself all this time. Something she was sure even Dale Jr. didn’t know. She watched as he visibly tried to calm himself down.

"After Buffy died, I didn’t think I would ever find that kind of love again but I did, it had been there all along, in a form I never knew to look for. I don’t know that he will see me either and if he does I don’t know what will happen with us but what I do know is I don’t regret a moment I’ve spent with that man since the first time a few years ago. I do love him and we almost lost him today, I don’t think I could live with that."

Brenda, Kelly, and Teresa all wiped the tears from their eyes. "Please tell him I’m sorry and it all stops here." Teresa said again.

"You’ll get to tell him yourself I promise."

Teresa left the room with a nod and Michael gave up on the doctors, he had to see him, now. He slowly made his way to Dale’s door.

CHAPTER 6

Dale stared at the television as the replay of his wreck ran over and over, ESPN, FOX Sports, local tv it didn’t matter there was no escape from the horror that almost was. He tried to remember what he felt in the car and all he could see was his life in fast forward.

The Good...Those few precious years when he and Kelly lived with both their parents. The hunting and fishing trips with his dad. Lazy weekends at the track while growing up. His niece’s birth. Michael.

And the Bad...The Divorce of his parents. The fire at his mom’s. The wreck that took his daddy. Michael. This.

How had he gotten through all of it before, he certainly didn’t feel strong enough to do it again. Michael had been a big part of his healing through the years and now he had to figure out how to heal without him. How was it that he put Michael in both categories? He had brought so much happiness back into his life and here he was screwing everything up. How could he have been so stupid? Everything he was, had become, was because of Michael.

How could he have let Teresa and Tony walk all over him like this. All the stupid things he said, did. He could have walked away, could have said no, instead he let Kortni in, then willingly slept with her.

How could he blame Michael for turning to Steve? He deserved Steve, Steve didn’t screw things up like he did. He would love him like he should be loved. So many questions not enough answers. The emotions finally won and Dale choked on the very idea of Michael in Steve’s arms. It was a picture he didn’t have to imagine and that was also his fault. He came so close to losing him that day, and what did he do, he drove him right back into those same arms. Dale couldn’t hold back the sobs that racked his body but the tears wouldn’t come. There was nothing, he had become so dehydrated that he couldn’t even cry. He closed his eyes laying his head back down wondering if he would ever be happy again.

Michael quietly opened the door careful to not wake Dale. He took a deep breath as he took the site in front of him in. He was even paler than usual, laying bare-chested with the sheet pulled up to his waist. There was a burn on his chin, his lip was blistered, his forehead was red almost like a sunburn. His neck looked horrible, it was red, blistered, they had left the bandages off and he could see a slimy coating of what Michael guessed was an antibiotic ointment covering it. He could only imagine after hearing everyone talk, what his legs looked like. Michael could tell Dale wasn’t wearing much if anything under the sheet, clothing must have been too painful.

Michael took a seat next to the bed and after several minutes of watching Dale’s chest rise and fall with each breath and convincing himself he was alive, he looked to the tv trying to relax his brain. It had been in overdrive since Kelly’s call, he was certain that he would be…‘no, he is here and he’s ok. Just stop it Michael.’ He focused back on the tv only to see the replay of the wreck for the 1000th time that day.

"Why did I even get out of the car? They shouldn’t have pulled me away, just let me…"

Michael turned shocked at what he was hearing. "Don’t say that, don’t you ever say that again." Michael turned his chair so it was facing Dale completely. "Do you know what that would do to me?"

Dale looked at Michael, wondering if he was a dream, trying to get lost in a beautiful memory that was them. "It hurts Mikey."

"I know, bro, the burns are going to hurt for a while."

"That’s not what I’m talking about."

Michael looked down at him sympathetically he didn’t know what to say and Dale took his silence as the end. He wished he could cry, instead it came out as a pathetic whimper. "I was so horrible to you. It’s ok. I don’t blame you for turning to Steve, he’ll be good to you. He‘ll give you what you deserve, what I can‘t give you. I just want you to be happy Mikey."

Michael looked confused. "Steve? I didn’t know you knew about that." He looked down before looking back up quickly as Dale’s words hit him. "Wait, Dale, do you think Steve and I? No, he was being a friend when I needed one." Dale flinched at his words. "I’m sorry I didn’t mean it that way, Steve and I didn’t sleep together. The only time I’ve been with Steve like that, you were with us." He stumbled all over his words amazed that Dale could think he would betray him that way. "Dale I love you, I could never be with him that way. Teresa apologized she would like to talk to you, she feels horrible."

"She should." Dale couldn’t believe what he was hearing. He hadn’t slept with Steve. He knew he had to come clean with everything. "I need to tell you something. I slept with…"

"I know Dale." Dale looked mortified. "Kortni. I know you slept with her."

"What, how?"

"Dale, I saw you two in Victory Lane at Richmond. I was coming to you when I saw you guys together, that‘s why I went to Steve‘s. I saw what was happening and didn’t know how to stop it. I saw the marks on your neck the next day, they didn’t come from me so…"

"So Steve really only came over to try and fix things…God, I’m so sorry, I was drunk and I know that isn’t an excuse, I never cared about her. I kicked her out the next day, told her it was over, and…"

"What do you mean Steve came over."

"He came over the day after Richmond, I thought he was rubbing it in my face that you went to him but he wasn’t. God, he came over to try and keep us together." Dale’s mind raced.

"He didn’t tell me he did that." Michael smiled. "Leave it up to Steve to try and keep everyone together no matter…"

"How bad he wants you?" Dale finished his statement.

"Dale you know…"

"I know, I’m sorry." He shook his head and laid it against the pillow. "How can you be sitting here, telling me you love me, acting like…"

"Like what, like I want to try again?"

"I slept with Kortni and you, God you didn‘t sleep with Steve. I didn’t do it out of vengeance I did it cause I’m an idiot. How could I have been so stupid?" Dale said angrily at himself.

Michael looked down. Dale was Dale. He would screw up again, probably soon and maybe then Michael would have had enough. "Look, we’ve both screwed up in the past." But he had gotten a hard dose of what life without him would be like today, it was one Michael wasn’t quite ready to face. He would deal with whatever came next, later. "I asked you once how you could forgive me, remember what you told me?"

Dale nodded his head. "Because I loved you."

Michael smiled. "I told you a long time ago this wasn’t going to be easy. We both knew what we were getting into and I‘m not saying everything is going to work out now. But I think we owe it too ourselves to try and make it work once more. If we are going to fail then we should do so by our own hand not because someone else set us up. June, I do love you." Michael took Dale’s hand in his. "Now, close your eyes, you need to rest."

Dale squeezed his hand. "Don’t leave."

"I’m not going anywhere." Michael watched as Dale closed his eyes. "I’m not going anywhere."

Neither Dale or Michael heard the door shut behind them. "Martin? You ok?" Kelly asked as she came to check in on her brother. "Martin you are white as a ghost, is he ok?"

She got panicked and went for the door. "Don’t. Yeah, he’s fine, he’s uh, he’s in there with, um, Mike."

Kelly was relieved but looked at Martin. "You didn’t know, did you?"

Martin’s eyes grew wide. "You did?"

"Yes, Martin it’s ok. It really is, please, if you have a problem with it, for Dale’s sake don’t do anything, not now. So much that you don’t know about has happened and he couldn’t take it if he thought he would lose your friendship."

Just then the door opened and Michael stepped out. "Hey, he’s asleep, I’m going to grab a soda." He looked at the odd way Martin looked at him. "What? Oh?" He ran his fingers through his hair. "Man, you’d think I’d get use to this by now. Look what ever you have to say please say it to me and not him. He’s really messed up right now and I don’t want him hurt anymore."

He looked from Kelly to Mike in shock. "No, of course I won’t." He peered back through the small window of the door at Dale, his mind reeling. "I don’t want to lose him, his friendship, I mean. Wait, what about Kortni?"

"Long story."

"I just, I didn’t realize he, uh, you guys, well you know."

"Come on Marty, I’ll give ya the short version." Kelly said as they walked back towards the waiting room.

Michael saw the look that Kelly missed. The one full of hope, lust, the doors that could possibly open in Martin’s life now. Michael looked back through the window, obviously Dale had never turned to him, for anything. They seemed so close like brothers, best friends.

He couldn’t help but think about the two of them. Their ages were much more matched, they had more in common. Although it would still be hard for them to make it work it would be easier. He shook his head of the thoughts and headed for the soda machine. He had a sinking feeling that maybe this wasn’t going to work after all.

Chapter 7-9