in time for Mother's Day!
A date with mom
21 years of marriage, I discovered a new way of keeping alive the spark of love.
A little while ago, I started to go out with another woman.
It was really my wife's idea. "I know that you love her," she
said one day, taking me by surprise. "But
I love YOU," I protested. "I know, but you also love her." The
other woman that my wife wanted me to visit was my mother, who has been a widow
for 19 years. The demands of my work and my three children had made it possible
to visit her only occasionally. That night I called to invite her to go out for
dinner and a movie. "What's wrong, are you okay?" she asked. My mother
is the type of woman who suspects that a late night call or a surprise
invitation is a sign of bad news. "I
thought that it would be nice to spend some time with you," I responded.
"Just the two of us?" She thought about it for a moment, and
then said, "I would like that very much."
Friday after work, as I drove over to pick her up I was a bit nervous. When I
arrived at her house, I noticed that she, too, seemed to be nervous about our
"date". She waited in the door with her coat on. She had curled her
hair and was wearing the dress that she had worn to celebrate her last wedding
anniversary. She smiled from a face that was as radiant as an angel's was.
"I told my friends that I was going to go out with my son, and they
were impressed," she said, as she got into the car. "They can't wait
to hear about our meeting."
went to a restaurant that, although not elegant, was very nice and cozy. My
mother took my arm as if she were the First Lady. After we sat down, I had to
read the menu. Her eyes could only read large print. Half way through the entrées,
I lifted my eyes and saw Mom sitting there staring at me. A nostalgic smile was
on her lips. "It was I who used to have to read the menu when you were
small," she said. "Then it's time that you relax and let me return the
favor," I responded.
During the dinner, we had an agreeable conversation – nothing
extraordinary - but catching up on recent events of each other's life.
We talked so much that we missed the movie. As we arrived at her house
later, she said, "I'll go out with you again, but only if you let me invite
you." I agreed. "How was your dinner date?" asked my wife when I
got home. "Very nice. Much more so than I could have imagined," I
A few days later, my mother died of a massive heart attack. It happened
so suddenly that I did not have a chance to do anything for her. Some time
later, I received an envelope with a copy of a restaurant receipt from the same
place my mother and I had dined. An attached note read: "Son, I paid this
bill in advance. I was almost sure that I could not be there but, nevertheless,
I paid for two plates - one for you and the other for your wife. You will never
know what that night meant for me. I love you."
that moment, I understood the importance of saying, in time: "I LOVE
YOU" and to give our loved ones the time that they deserve. Nothing in life
is more important than your family. Give them the time they deserve, because
these things cannot be put off until "some other time."
said it takes about six weeks to get back to normal after you've had a baby
somebody doesn't know that once you're a mother, "Normal," is history.
said you learn how to be a mother by instinct
somebody never took a three-year-old shopping.
said being a mother is boring
somebody never rode in a car driven by a teenager with a driver's permit.
said if you are a "good" mother, your child will "turn out
somebody thinks a child comes with directions and a guarantee.
said "good" mothers never raise their voices
somebody never came out the back door just in time to see her child hit a golf
ball through the neighbor's kitchen window.
said you do not need an education to be a mother
somebody never helped a fourth grader with his math.
said you could not love the fifth child as much as you love the first
somebody doesn't have five children.
said a mother could find all the answers to her child-rearing questions in the
somebody never had a child stuff beans up his nose or in his ears.
said the hardest part of being a mother is labor and delivery
never watched her "baby" get on the bus for the first day of
kindergarten ... or on a plane headed for military "boot camp."
said a mother could do her job with her eye closed and one hand tied behind her
somebody never organized seven giggling Brownies to sell cookies.
said a mother could stop worrying after her child gets married
doesn't know that marriage adds a new son or daughter-in-law to a mother's
said a mother's job is done when her last child leaves home
never had grandchildren.
said your mother knows you love her, so you do not need to tell her
somebody isn't a mother.