Road trip 2 - Written by Jessie

Disclaimer: I WILL EET YOUR HED.

 After the last incident that resulted in the group being covered in... “Joey chunks” they finally cleaned up themselves and the van. The van was in a car wash getting a thorough inside and out cleaning. They waited at the car wash's lobby, the whole Crayon Vision and Yu-Gi-Oh gang. Of course, not sitting down quietly, if you think that you must be nuts. Jessie and Makore were raiding the air fresheners, Naomi, Allie, C.J., Tea and Yugi sat discussing on where they were going next, Joey and Tristan stood at a large window, and watched the van go though the wash.

 “This doesn't smell like vanilla!” Jessie said, in uproar, holding a small pine tree shaped piece of cardboard.

 “Yeah, 'cos it's coconut!” Makore said, looking at the package it came in.

 “Hm. Yes. Brilliant deduction.” Jessie said, trying to make up for her pseudo-stupidity.

 “Hey, guys! The van is done!” Joey bounded over to the group. Tristan, of course, followed.
 
 “Great! Now we can get going.” Yugi said.

 “It's settled, we're going...” Naomi said, but as she said the destination, a large truck passed the station, honking it's horn loudly. (TEEHEE.)

 “Awesome. Sounds like a plan.” Jessie said, “I'll be right back. I'll go pick up the van. Everyone, meet me up front.”

 And so they did. When they arrived in the new car, it was minty fresh. Leterally. So, they piled back in.

 “We're gonna take a left from the exit over there if we want to make it there in time.” Allie said quietly.

 “Good.” Jessie nodded.

 “So... where are we going again?” Allie said.
 
 “You forgot?” C.J. leaned over to look at Allie. “We're going to...” And just as C.J.  mentioned where they were going, the Balrog from Lord of the Millennium items loudly stomped past and roared just as loud, it was soon followed by Pegasus (still in his Gandalf outfit).

 “Ooh.” Allie said. Jessie looked at her with a concerned face, turning on the left hand blinker.

 “What's up, Allie? It's no like you to forget stuff like that.” Naomi said.

 “It's nothing.”

 “I mean, being covered in Joey chunks is pretty traumatizing.” Jessie shrugged.

 “It was your fault!”

 “No, it's not that. I think I'm fine.” Allie said. Jessie finally turned left and headed down the highway.

 “Alright! we're going to...” Tristan started, and JUST SO SUDDENLY, a bomb dropped out of the sky, and hit him. Strangely enough, the van wasn't even scratched! Not even a hole in the roof of a burn mark where Tristan had been blown up. Actually, he just disappeared with a large cartoon-like explosion exclaiming: “BOMB!” It was magic.

 Most didn't know how to react to this. Others were just confused. But Makore added in a word of wisdom for the group. “He'll be back.” Surprisingly, everyone agreed. Even the shocked little Yugi.

 From there the trip continued on. It was peaceful for the first few miles. Besides the sudden death of Tristan, everything was fine. Matter of fact, maybe a little too fine for this author's tastes. Muhuhu. So, I think Tristan is gonna come back. Because I like him too much for him to be gone for long.

 “Hey, guys.” Tristan said, *POOF*ing back into excistance.

 “Hey, Tristan.” Joey said, kind of creaped out at the fact that his own best friend just died and magically came back to life.

 “Ah, alright, looks like everyone's here.” Jessie said, looking down quickly at her watch. “We should get there soon. How many miles, Allie?”

 “Let's see...” Allie said, looking thoughtful. “I... don't know.”

 DUN DUN DUN.

 “What!?” Jessie said, making the van swerve a little.

 “What's wrong?” Tea said. (WOW. She said something. That's a big deal because the author doesn't like writing for Tea. So the author is pending on wither to dispose of her or not. HEE.)

 “I feel... a disturbance.” Allie said, worried. “Something near by.”

 “I don't like where this is going...” Naomi said, looking out the window next to her.

 “What do you think it is?”  Yugi said, looking up at Naomi.

 “What else!?” Makore said.

 “Malik.” Everyone said grimly.

 “You better believe it.” Jessie said, snickering. “But you wont believe what he's driving this time!”

 “Another bus... but smaller?” Joey said.

 “No.”

 “A pinto!” Makore said.

 “Noooo....”

 “A sports car?” Tristan said.

 “You wish!”

 “....”

 “A WIENER MOBILE?!?” C.J. said loudly, bursting into laughter.
 

 Indeed it was. Malik was in a Oscar Wiener Mobile. But the title on it was scratched out with a large X of red paint, and over it written with black paint was: “MALIK'S DOOM MOBILE.” And boy, was it gaining on our hero's van fast.

 “That wiener must be going about 95 miles per hour!” Makore said. Naomi elbowed him in the ribs. “OW! What?”

 “This is getting very weird..” Tea said. (The author still needs to kill her off.)

 “What about I just duel him this time, so he wont chase us anymore?” Yugi said.

 “No. We can't. I mean, it's gonna take, like... ten whole episodes!” Jessie said, looking at the rear view mirror. “I think we can out-wit him again.”

 “Everyone, please make sure your seat belts are secured tightly.” C.J. said, taking her own seat belt, and showing everyone else.

 “Don't worry, I'll make it quick.” Jessie smiled, swerving left, and cutting in front of Malik. Jessie looked behind her and saw Malik pull right and speed up to them. “Perfect.”

 “MUHAHAHA!!! THINK YOU COULD GET RID OF ME THAT EASILY!?!?!?1/1” Malik yelled.

 “Yes.” Jessie said quietly. She quickly pulled out a dime from her pocket  and threw it into the road. It landed in front of Malik's wiener mobile. (Okay, now in slow motion:) The van stops abruptly on the dime... AND FLIPS OVER. (Back in normal speed) The van zooms away as the weiner mobile crashes and burns.
 
 “Wow, Jessie! How'd you do that?” Yugi said.

 “Haha. Weiner Mobiles, they stop on a dime!” Jessie chuckled.

 “I don't get it.” Joey said.

 “I don't think anyone but Jessie does.” Tristan shrugged.

 “Hey, look! There's a Starbucks at the next exit.” C.J. said.

 “There was one at the last exit too.” Makore said nonchalantly.

 “Eh. Can we go?” C.J. said, looking at Jessie.

 “Sure. Why not.” Jessie turned to the exit and they arrived at the Starbucks. Jessie looked back at everyone. “Want anything?”

 Yugi flinched uneasly (reference to “The Greatest Yu-Gi-Oh Fic EVAR”), and Tristan looked out the window for a LARGE BLACK CHOCOBO (reference to “The Greatest Yu-Gi-Oh Fic EVAR”). Everyone else told Jessie what they wanted, and of course forked over some cash. Coffee doesn't come free, you know.

 “Anyone coming with?” Jessie said, opening her door.

 “I'll go.” Joey said. “I wanna see if they got 'dem espresso cookies.” He jumped out of the car quickly.

 “Okay, okay. Just don't make trouble.” Jessie said, acting as if she was assigned the worst babysitting job in the world. Anyway, they walked into the Starbucks, and Jessie ordered everyone's various coffees and drinks. Joey got his stupid cookie. As they were walking out, Joey was staring contentedly at it.

 “I can't wait. This looks really good.” Joey said excitedly.

 “You better munch on it outside, Chuckles, I don't want crumbs in my van.” Jessie said stiffly. They both got to the van. Jessie climbed in and handed everyone their stuff,  Joey stood outside as told.

 “Alright, alright. Don't leave without me.” Joey said, unwrapping his cookie from it's wax paper.

 “Wouldn't dream of it.” Jessie said sarcasticly from inside the van.

 Joey looked at the cookie for a moment.. then suddenly began scarfing it down really fast. Jessie peered out from the van.

 “Hey, you tasting that?” But before Joey could answer, he finished the cookie.

 “Whoa, I feel weird.” Joey said. Suddenly the ground around them began to rumble. There was a flash of bright light that surrounded Joey. Everyone else piled out from the van.

 “What's wrong with Joey!?” Tristan said in shock.

 “Is he going Super Saiyjin?” Makore said.

 “No. Only Kaiba can, remember?” C.J. poked him.

 “Not now, guys, something's about to happen!” Naomi said in awe.

 The flash of light got brighter.. and brighter... and BOOM! With a large explosion, the light vanished. In Joey's place was a... BIG FSCKIN' MEGA JOEY! (Or for those who have seen the anime Better Man, ... Betterman.) He kinda looked like a transformer, but not. It was kind of, Joey-like.  Wait, just forget it. The author is lazy and decided that it looks like Betterman, but with Joey's hair. There.

 “Holy crap...” Jessie said.

 “Okay. I now I know I'm dreaming.” Tea said. And then suddenly a meteor fell from the sky and crushed her (YES.)

 Everyone else continued to comment, unphased by Tea's death. BFMJ (short for the new Joey's form) just stood there. Soon enough everyone was wondering how to get Joey to normal, or to keep him that way and use him as a new form of transportation. The author was also wondering how to find a way to end this fic.

 “Wait, I got an idea.” Jessie said, standing at BFMJ's feet. Kaiba's segway scooter zoomed by, rider-less. Jessie paused to watch it, then continued. “In order for Joey to turn back to normal, we must preform a sacred spell!” She said.

 “What kind of spell?” Allie said.
 
 “A spell... of epic... epicness.” Jessie said wisely. “Joey is obviously suffering from a sugar and Caffeine overhaul. In order to turn him back, we must fight fire with fire...”

 “How are we going to get another cookie big enough to feed THAT?” Naomi said, pointing at BFMJ. Poor BFMJ looked down at them and made a sound that sounded oddly like a weep.

 “Poor Joey. I bet he's really upset about that. Alright, let's turn him back to normal.” Yugi said.

 Moved by Yugi's one sentence of a speech, Jessie continued on with her plan.

 Soon enough, Jessie had everyone standing on top the van. Most of them looked embarrassed, some highly amused. Jessie still stood at BFMJ's feet. “Alright everybody, on my call, we will all say the magic word together, and the spell will activate.” Several comments and complaints came from the group, but soon they were silenced.

 “Three... two... one...”

 All at once they all yelled: “CHANTA!”

 Then... suddenly... IT BEGAN TO RAIN CADBURY CREAM EGGS!!

 “It's... a miracle!” Naomi said, full of joy, catching several in her hands.

 “It's impossable!” C.J. said, catching an egg. She unrapped it and ate it. “Yet strangely delicious!”

 “Open up wide, Joey!” Jessie said, jumping up and down. BIG FSCKIN' MEGA JOEY opened it... his mouth and took in about... a hundred or so cardbury eggs. Soon enough, in another bright flash of light, Joey was back to his smaller and annoying self.

 “Augh, man. I have a stomach ache.” Joey said, falling over.

 “That's what you get for having too much sugar, man.” Tristan said, jumping down from the van with the others following.

 “So, should we be on our way?” Jessie said, as Tristan, C.J., and Yugi helped poor Joey into the van.

 “We still have some time.” Allie said, looking at her own watch.

 “Okay, let's go.” Naomi said, nibbling on a cadbury egg. Makore was catching the remaining carbury eggs upon order from Naomi.

 Just before they stepped into the fan, they all said: “We're on our way too...”

 “I'LL GET YOU NEXT TIME, YUGI! NEXT TIMEEEE!!” Screeched Malik as he zoomed by on the remains of his weiner mobile.

END

Author's Note: Okay, not as good as the first one. It's like the diet coke of the first Road Trip. Note quite good enough. But I did write this within a time limit, so I didn't have time do to much. Yeah. Go away now.