Mood:  chillin'

   Sigh, another holiday season rolling through and not a hint of contrition from my not so nice ex. Each Xmas season I have a hope that she will come to see how mean she has been and continues to be. It seems in vain. Her kids know she's stubborn way beyond reasonable thinking. They accept that. I'm never going to give in to my ex's reasoning, I stand tall. My ex did serious damage not letting our kids know to respect both parents equally. Instead she went to teach them that because I didn't do as she wanted, I was wrong.

   One day the ex will realize her mistake and then it will be too far gone to recover,

   Happy Holidays.

TBB

Mood:  down

    Racist, westboro church, my ex. What do these things have in common? They use the first amendment to write, say and do bad things against others. There is no good exceuse to be hateful.

    My mom died this past Tuesday. Had it worked out, I would have given up talking to my mom in deference to staying married. I am SO happy that the marriage didn't work out. I would never have forgiven myself for my ex's vanity. Be thankful.

   Remember folks, don't choose to be friends with those who write or say bad things against you.

TBB

Mood:  not sure

     Hmmm? Could it be that the ex is trying to act nice? Until her and I re-open and get closure on issues there can be no burying the hatchet. Time hasn't healed anything. Time has just stretched the bad stuff out. Writing bad things about me and/or my friends on the web is just as valid today as it was when she pinced off the discussion over it. She chose freedom of speech and I chose freedom of choice. Now there are more things on the table which keep the chances of friendship further apart than ever.

    Remember, don't take up friendships with  people who would say or write bad things about you.

TBB

Mood:  bright

   Sigh, another holiday comes around. This time each year I hope the ex will make an effort to get past her bitter attitude. I hope she might accept working things out between us.

   At last check, the ex was saying freedom of speech is more important than trying to get along like adults. She is the only grown up I know who doesn’t act like an adult when reasoned with. There are more issues between us than just the bad things she writes.

   At one point I got the feeling that the ex thought I might see what she perceived as the error of my ways. No chance, time doesn’t make things better for anyone. With no communication the whole thing froze. If anything it is so bad now it may never be fixed.

   Sadly, the ex in her twisted logic, influenced her older daughters to come to believe the ex is correct in her assertions.

   The ex has shown my older daughters it’s okay to blow someone off. The ex has taught them that standing up for saying something bad about someone is better than the saying “if you can’t say something nice about someone, don’t say anything”. Some life lesson huh. Even more so, it’s about their dad.

   I have never pulled back my offer to work together to lay issues between my ex and I to rest. If tomorrow she snapped over to goodness I would still accept fair mediation to fix things between us.

   The ex and I aren’t friends for sure. The ex would say that it’s me not being friends with her that is damage to our kids. The ex isn’t qualified to judge here. She broke up the family claiming the best thing was not to let her daughters see her not happy. The ex has views for sure.

   For the sake of our daughters and righteousness I hope the ex sees the bright side of getting along instead of the don’t let your guard down attitude she has.

   To her credit, things have been a lot less dramatic in my life since I unfriended the ex. I think all 3 daughters are acutely aware of their mom’s stubborn ways. I will continue to observe my freedom of speech by making my choice not to be friends.

Mood:  not sure

   Oh well, another year gone by. I was hoping the e-ex would let down her self righteous facade. No luck. I sometimes wish we can put everything on the table and work out our differences for the kids. United we stand, divided, you know.

Mood:  incredulous

   The not nice ex mentioned something in an email to the me the other day. She said something like I should "get over" my non friendship with her these past 6 years or so.

   Folks, I've said this before, don't hang with people who are mean to you. If the write mean things about you, if they create problems, if they bring you court issues, keep them out of your life as much as you can.

   My ex thinks she's always right. She can keep that thought. The past few years have been nicer because I DON'T talk to the ex as friends. I know I have more piece of mind that she is off my friends list.

   Long ago I tried to work for a resolution to the differences my ex and I have. She wanted no part of it. She was convinced she and she alone was correct. To get along we would have had to find a middle ground for both of us. Things have gotten worse between us since then. It looks like we will never fix things.

   Is this so bad? I think not. My 2 older kids have been impressed by their mom to believe she is correct. I believe in time they will understand. Not getting along keeps the tension and anxiety down.

Later,

TBB

Mood:  chillin'

   Friendship between 2 parties means that each person must be agreeable with the way the other person is.

   It seems my ex might think that she friendship means something else as well. It seems that despite me firmly not liking a lot about the way she is, that friendship is possible.

   This is wrong on her part. She has done and continues to do disrespectful things to me. There is no time when any status will change until something is formally worked out between us. She has her reasons. I still have all the reasons I had back when we started marriage counseling. I have more reasons now. There is no status quo, there is no context for being friends. We both have our reasons.

   Yet it seems she would think that it's all over, she is right and that's all there is to it. WRONG.

   Until a day when / if we work things out between us, there can't be friendship.

Mood:  quizzical

   Wow, now the evil ex is lapsing into memory problems. Ya' see, right now she is under a belief that when I have my youngest daughter outside regular time, I don't care whether I get her back to her mom on time. Yeah, I know, crazy. After her and I talked special visit times with our daughter on our birthdays, the ee seem to think I may not bring her back in a timely manner.

   This is a new mental low for the ee. I always have tried to get the daughter back on time. The ee has slid out into crazy doubt. She seems to now think I wouldn't try to always be on time. Who knows what she thinks really? She has shown thoughts which suggest she is going off the deep end.

   It seems the ee wants particular wording regarding getting my daughter back. The ee refuses to allow any shared time with my daughter outside court ordered time because of this. As she is whack enough to apply this to me. it will applied to her until she changes her mind.

   Folks, beware of individuals like this who suffer from vain self righteousness. They eventually convince themselves they are always right. They won't arbitrate, counsel or mediate. Instead they remain wallowing in their dark opinions. Nothing good ever comes to anyone as a result of this.

  So it continues... 

Mood:  happy

Let's get this straight,

There won't be any contrition from me toward my ex. When we separated that was it. The divorce set everything back to default. I'm just as put off at the things she did as she may be with me. 

Somehow it seems the ex thinks I owe her something, not. I think she feels like she still is the special someone with whom I owe something to, not.      GET OVER IT.

Since divorce she has done some bad things. As we are adults she shouldn't be surprised that when she treats me bad, I will treat her the same. Though I'm tempted to treat her with less respect than I give others, I won't. Mutual respect is what she will always get from me. 

She recently had the nerve to suggest I don't even be around her when on public property. She mentioned "boundaries" I should respect. What a joke. I have boundaries she crossed long time ago.

Her formidable attitude is lost on me. I push back. Grow up TM. I've nothing to prove to you that you don't have to prove to me. The burning of your dark heart improperly infuences our children making them cynical. You do a diservice to parenting. 

Mood:  d'oh

    I've been thinking about the evil ex. She has a lot of nerve to act the wicked way she does.

    It's particularly rude for her to impress wrong thoughts on my 2 oldest daughters.

    The evil one spontaneously sought and got 100% child support.

    When my oldest daughter turned 18 the evil one told me she would no longer tell me about my daughter's medical situations. If my daughter wanted to tell me she would. Never did the evil ex link this to the fact I stopped paying legal child support on this daughter when she turned 18.

    My daughters have never approached me about helping them out. How could they possibly assume I won't help if they don't ask. do you suppose they think that I have to pay their mom direct to help them?

   What a f****n' lot of nerve my ex has. Taking way more money from me than she fairly deserves then impressing on my older kids that I don't care to help them financially. The evil ex is the sole reason I DON"T have the money to help. The evil ex needs to wrap herself around the idea she is selfish, mean and wrong.

    When the evil ex took that money I told her to save the balance she didn't deserve so she could help the big girls beyond child support.

    All this time the evil one should have been impressing on the kids that the money comes from BOTH parents.

   Any suggestion from the evil ex that I need to "sell something" or "downsize" is beyond reasonable comprehension. She needs to put a cork in it and reverse her evil ways.

    The evil ex should have impressed on my children that she and she alone is the reason why it is difficult to help them.

    Most sad, it seems my older children confuse lack of money support for lack of love. We don't communicate. This is squarely the fault of the evil ex. It is the ultimate selfish dark deed.