I Survive
Topic: The Old Days
Don't know how though. Handed in IT coursework yesterday. I can't believe I did 82 pages. No idea how I survived.

Also, only have history homework for tomorrow. A big relief really. Perhaps things are looking up, but still have Spreadsheet Coursework to hand in nxt Wednesday.

In other things, my life is, well, I don't know. Pain. Lost. Alone. I really do not know. It's been over a year since my mum died, yet it still hurts a lot. My faith in God is it's strongest ever, yet I have no direction. It's like God is not telling me for a reason. I know he's there for sure. Recent events have proven that:

- Had a Tuesday last week that could have been horrible but God just helped me out big time so that I could get the work done.

- Also, last Friday, I got my glasses back. I'd lost them like 6 weeks ago, the Friday before half term. Seems I'd left them in history and Mr Rule had them. I didn't worry too much, thought best not to, and things worked out great.

And yet, I am suffering. When you hurt yourself, you heal. Put a bandage round a wound, take some medicine. The pain goes, and you heal. But the pain I feel. The spiritual and emotional pain I go through, it doesn't, it can't heal. Sometimes I can put things out of my mind when i'm doing other things. But then something reminds me and I just feel the pain.

People don't realise what I go through, I put on such an image with people, but it comes natural to me as I enjoy humour, so I use it, I cover myself with it. It's what I have to do to get through things. It's what I have to do live my life. It's what I have to do so that I am not an emotinal wreck. It's what I have to do...





to Survive.


The Spookacious One