An Apology by Intro Voice


<Intro Voice>
Ahem.
Well.
Uh, really well.
Uh.
Okay, a couple of weeks ago I sort of, well, overstepped my authority a little.
All right, I overstepped a lot. That's not the point.
The point is if I'd done all that in a constructive manner without deceiving Grey and everyone else by now I'd have my own recording deal and a series of back up dancers . . .
Yes, I suppose this is all a bit off topic.
Anyway, what I did was wrong, I realise that now. The Mighty Trout has connected solidly with my head and knocked loose all the delusions of grandeur and foolishness.
But don't worry, I'm better now!
Well, I suppose I should start apologising now.
I would like to apologise to our sponsors, of whom there are none. I would like to apologise to our affiliates, again of whom there are none. And I would like to apologise to our expert marksman, who found out the hard way as he constantly aimed for my head, that he is not as expert a marksman as he thought he was.
Okay, the expert marksman didn't really do that bad a job, it just turns out that he had lost his keys, caught a late bus and still couldn't get in here anyway, though by that point I was considerably more horizontal than normal. So I suppose I don't really have to apologize to the marksman all that much, though I'm sure he went through quiet a bit of mental anguish, we don't often have the opportunity to use an expert marksman around here and he was getting board just being the official paint watcher, but none of that is really my fault so I suppose I don't actually have to apologize. For that anyway.
Though I do have to apologize for spoiling an episode for you, the audience. Okay, two episodes. Apparently I had such an effect on the situation, such a magnificent, massive, enormous effect, on the situation, sort of like the effect a meteor the size of India would have on New York, apparently enough of an effect to cause a few hiccups in last week's episode.
So here I am now, apologising as only I can. Attempting to atone for my misdeeds.
Of course, it's not all my fault you know.
If Grey had been a bit more interesting I would not have been forced to spice things up for the benefit of everyone else here.
But I'm not here to throw stones or cast doubts upon Grey. However deserved they may be.
Whatever my intentions, however noble my goals I still overstepped my bounds as Intro Voice.
I had no right to hijack an episode without warning or consent from any outside party.
Although, if enough of you were to agree . . .
Never mind that though.
So I apologise.
I apologise as only I can.
In song.
<End Intro Voice>

Hey, we warned you!

<Intro Voice>
Yes, and I'm apologising, just let me apologise in my own way.
<End Intro Voice>

Not with singing.

<Intro Voice>
Oh yeah, try and stop me!
<THWACK>
<End Intro Voice>

Oh my God, you've killed Intro Voice!

Look, that's so unfunny not even the South Park guys are doing it anymore.

It's a statement of truth, I'm not trying to be funny.

Good, because you're failing. Uh, shouldn't he be moving by now?

Great, I get one old, used up joke and it turns out to be even less funny than I thought it would be.

I think he's still breathing.

What do we do?

I don't know, he can't end this now, and he's always the one who ends this.

So what do we do?

Uh, how does he usually finish these things?

Uh, something about you, The Mighty Trout and a sunset.

Yeah, usually I'm running off into one. I think I remember it now.

So what now?

I run off into the sunset, waving The Mighty Trout high, sure to encounter stupidity again.

And what about me and Intro Voice?

I don't know, I've got a sunset to run off into.

Hey! Get back here!

No!