Okay, here's a growing collection of my favorite quotes from my comic books. Mostly Wolverine and Gambit right now, but I haven't gone through my entire collection of books just yet.
Kurt: “I must owe you a couple dozen cases of beer…”
Logan: “Twenty-nine to be precise. An’ when it comes to the important things in life--namely brew an’ broads, I am very precise.” Uncanny X-Men #149
Rogue: “Sooo, the girls really looked like they were digging you in there…”
Logan: “Yeah, it’s the hair.” ~X-Men Unlimited #35
Nick Fury: “Agent 13 here has her underwear inna ball ‘cuz I reassumed my position as director o’ S.H.I.E.L.D. Add the fact that yer torqued ‘cuz Ferrari spilt after finding’ out she had two beaus fer the price o’ one an’ this room is loaded with misery.” ~Captain America #45
Po: “Logan? Do you draw?”
Logan: “No.”
Po: “Do you talk to dead things?”
Logan: “No.”
Po: “So, what are you good at?”
Logan: “Maiming things. Killing mostly.”
Po: “Well, that’s something at least.” ~Wolverine/Hulk #1
Alien: “Behold the Jean Bomb! It possesses the power to fatally disrupt any and all relationships. Personal, professional, organic, inorganic, macro-, micro-, whatever, down to the most primally sub-atomic molecular networks. Her mere presence will dissolve the most loving bonds, prompt brother to slay brother, and boon champions to tear themselves apart.” Uncanny X-Men #245
Charles Xavier: “Wolverine, call me ‘Professor’, ‘Professor X’, ‘Professor Xavier’, or even, if you must, ‘Charles’. But not ‘Charley’. Is that understood?”
Wolverine: “Sure, Chuck.” Uncanny X-Men #139
Jake (After Remy cut off Jake’s finger for Sinister): “This was my dialing finger! You have no idea how tough it is to use a cell phone without it?”
Remy: “You can grow it back.”
Jake: “I know, I know--but I hate losing any of my matter! You know, I used to be six foot two! I’m down to five nine.”
Remy: “Five eight an’ a half, I figure…”~Gambit #9
Nightcrawler: “Wolverine, she called you… ‘Logan’?”
Wolverine: “Yup.”
Nightcrawler: “Is that your name?”
Wolverine: “Yup.”
Nightcrawler: “You never told us.”
Wolverine: “You never asked.” Uncanny X-Men #139
Scott(oogling Betsy): "Sorry, my mind must have been elsewhere."
Jean: "The gutter perhaps?"~X-Men #8
Carol Danvers: “You startled me, I didn’t hear you approach.”
Logan: “No one ever does.” Uncanny X-Men #154
Nightcrawler: “Never, Dear Lady. Your presence is always welcome.”
Storm: “Flatterer.”
Nightcrawler: “That’s me, the silver tongued, blue-furred devil.” Uncanny X-Men #167
Remy: “What’s the matter?”
Jake: “I can’t find me.”
Remy: “Is this like an Oprah-thing?”~Gambit #14
Cyclops: “Wolverine! What the blazes are you doing here?”
Wolverine: “What’s is look like? I’m ridin’ home in style an’ jawin’ with a pretty girl.” Uncanny X-Men #121
Beast: "Ah, kernels, kernels everywhere...and not a one to eat...with my feet!" ~X-Men '95 Annual
Wolverine: "What happened here? It looks like a freight train full o' butt-kick rolled through with no breaks." ~Wolverine #98
Jubilee: “Hellooo, hairy backed naked man here! Lookit Pryde, I know you guys were tight back in the day, and I can appreciate the relationship ya had before I showed up and utterly swiped his affections…but I prefer my Canucklehead clothed, thank you very--”
(Wolverine passes by, giving both of them an eyeful)
Jubilee: “Oooyy--”
Shadowcat: “You were saying…?”~Uncanny X-Men '99 Annual
Rogue: “Take a hike, shorty! Lemme do mah good deed f’r the day.” Uncanny X-Men #173
Remy: “What kind of loon has guard alligators on his property?! Dat ain’t right!”~Gambit #25
Jubilee: “Why does everyone say my name like it means ‘shut up’?” ~X-Men #10
Longshot: “Dead, burned animal flesh and unborn baby birds…Yum!”
Rogue: “Don’t be gross Longshot. Those are ham-n’-eggs.” Uncanny X-Men #217
Moira (to Charles): “An’ if Lil’s T.L.C. does na’ do the trick… I’ll kick you in the butt.” Uncanny X-Men #167
Wolverine: “Doom’s replaced my costume too. Considerate of him. He probably doesn’t want any naked savages runnin’ around his precious chateau.” Uncanny X-Men #146
Scott: “Tell me, Jean, is this the place where old discos go to die?” Uncanny X-Men #130
Kitty: “Professor Xavier is a jerk!” Uncanny X-Men #168
Wolverine: “Nothing like an explosive decompression t’ really liven up the day.” Uncanny X-Men #166
Kurt (swiping Remy‘s sandwich): “Turkey? Good.”
Remy: “Got my coodies.”
Kurt: “Had worse.”~ Gambit #1
Wildchild: “Where else could a guy with a face only a blind mother could love--hanging out with a goddess among us--share a drink without drawin’ a crowd?”
Storm: “Any Kalvin Clein commercial.”~Uncanny X-Men '96 Annual
Rogue: “No fair! Cutitout you’re tickling!”
Nightcrawler: “And you are ticklish!”
Rogue: “I’ll bash you buster! Stopstopstop! Ah mean it!”
Nightcrawler: “Talk is cheap.” Uncanny X-Men #192
Kurt: “I’m wet! I hate wet!” Uncanny X-Men #192
Remy: “Stop screamin’ like a girl at a Backstreet Boys concert!”~Gambit #3
Rogue: “Hey, did I ever tell you how handsome and sexy you are? That rough look really gets to me…sure on some men, it looks just plain gnarly, but you sure wear it well…” ~X-Men Unlimited #35
Peter: “Perhaps you should borrow some of Longshot’s luck?”
Logan: “Perhaps, Rasputin, you should shut up. This is poker, got nothin’ to do with luck.” Uncanny X-Men #245
Remy (with one of Marrow’s bones stuck in his chest): “Tha’s funny…doesn’ hurt a bit.”~ Gambit '99 Annual
Alex: “They know you here?”
Logan: “They know me lots of places.” Uncanny X-Men #245
Bobby: “Sigh, all these years as an X-Man…fighting to protect a world that hates and fears us…and I come to this: Bobby Drake, super powered Babysitter?”~X-Men #47
Rogue: “In scientific terms: a-duh!”~ Gambit #15
Ororo: “Remy--are you all right?”
Remy: “Eh? Yah--feel a little barfy.”~Gambit #2
Logan: “Since when did I ever do what I was told?” Uncanny X-Men #228
Lil’ Iceman: “Jerk!”
Lil’ Storm: “Ice-cube head!”~X-Men #47
Wolverine: “Look kid, I’m flattered and all, but Halloween’s still a few months away and I’m all out of candy.” ~X-Men Unlimited #37
Rogue: “Peter was made for gentler things.” Uncanny X-Men #211
The Revolving Door of Death
"What are you, one of those Halloween Slasher guys who keeps popping back to life after they been croaked?" ~Wolverine #47
Lil’ Storm: “Pwease Iceman and Phoenix…we don’t want to be killded.”~X-Men #47
Kitty: “I heard a guard say you’d been killed.”
Wolverine: “Funny, I heard some bozo make the same crack about you.” Uncanny X-Men #152
Bein' the Leader
Lil’ Rogue: “Run? That’s how ya got t’be leader? By coming up with ‘Run’?! Cheeze Wiz, Ah coulda said ‘Run’!”~X-Men #47
Wolverine: “Price of leadership is doin’ what’s necessary, not what you want.” Uncanny X-Men #211
Scott: “I should have been consulted.”
Ororo: “I am team leader, Scott, not you.”
Scott: “Then perhaps it’s time I took my old job back.” Uncanny X-Men #161
Lil’ Cyclops: “Back to Plan A everyone: RUN!”
Lil’ Gambit: “No offence mon ami, but I beginnin’ to t’ink ya only got de one plan!”~X-Men #47
Cyclops: “You know how to smash. If I wanted that in an X-Man, I’d have hired the Hulk!” Uncanny X-Men Annual #3
Fair's fair
Sabretooth: “Please what? ‘Please Mr. Sabretooth, put me outta my freakin’ misery?’ Sorry hon, I played eenie meanie miney moe fair and square. You won, or should I say, you lost?”~Gambit #7
Excuses
Policewoman:"I figured I'd wait and see just what Mister N.F.N. Logan looked like and hear what kind of tall tale he can spin up as I write him up!"
Logan:"M'am, I wouldn't presume to pull the ol' flim-flam on you...I could tell you all about gettin' pushed through the sewer system, throwin' down on a psycho killer in the park, messin' with an Indian forest spirit in Times Square, and dukin' it out with a guy that thinks he's my father and a gal who wants my bones--but why should I hassle a nice person who's just tryin' to do her job?" ~Wolverine #47
Rogue: “What am I going to tell him? I have to make up something. Let’s see…I took it for a tune-up and Magneto sneezed on it…a tree jumped out into the middle of the road and…” ~X-Men Unlimited #35
There is no I in Team
Wolverine: “We’re getting creamed after months o’ beatin’ some of the roughest characters on Earth… all of a sudden we’re coming apart like flamin’ amateurs.”
Shaman: “The key is teamwork, Wolverine. We have it. You don’t.” Uncanny X-Men #121
Lil’ Bishop: “Hey loser…don’t mess with the X-Men. Even the little ones.”
Lil’ Gambit: “’Specially the little ones.”~X-Men #47
Cyclops: “The bottom line, Storm, is that Wolverine is our friend…and whatever the cost, the X-Men take care of their own.” Uncanny X-Men #121
Them's fightin' words
Wolverine (a la Clint Eastwood): “Hey bub, I know what you’re thinking. ‘He’s hurt, an’ he’s five meters away from me, an’ I got a full clip of ammo in my rifle. Question is: can I kill Wolverine before he can reach me an’ cut me into shish-kebab with those freaky claws of his?’ Well bub, Wolverine is virtually unkillable. Wolverine’s claws are Adamantium, the strongest metal known--capable of slicing through Vanadium steel like a hot knife through butter. An’ five meters o’ floor ain’t much of a distance at all--fer me.” Uncanny X-Men #133
Nightcrawler: “Men of steel, jaws of glass. My kind of foe.” Uncanny X-Men #157
Logan: “It better be good, Fuzzy, ‘cause I feel pretty silly standin’ here--and I don’t like to feel silly.” Uncanny X-Men #153
Blade: “The cemetery, your eyes…I presumed…”
Remy: “Yah. An’ those swords you sportin’ shout out ‘Good Guy’.”~Gambit #14
Wolverine: “Crazy-shaped images o’ me--complete with claws--poppin’ outta the mirrors! Well, you bozos better know how to use ‘em!” Uncanny X-Men #123
Cyclops: “The way you’re fighting, a cub scout could beat you to a pulp.” Uncanny X-Men #127
Colossus: “We’re surrounded by hostile aliens!”
Logan: “Be a shame if something bad happens to my nice, new jacket!” Cover of Uncanny X-Men #245
Dazzler (in voiceover):”It takes a brave man or a consummate fool to challenge Wolverine. Especially once he pops his claws.” Uncanny X-Men #228
Blade: “You always talk this much when you fight?”
Gambit: “Nah. Jus’ gettin’ a rise outta you. Watch you go through your full range of emotions--grim t’ grimmer.”~Gambit #14
Logan: “Hey bub, I don’t need no company, especially the uninvited, knocking-the-drink-out-of-my-hand kind. Understand?” ~X-Men Unlimited #35
Constrictor: “Oh suck a rock, you sanctimonious hypocrite!”
Daredevil: “Points for your surprising use of the language.”~Gambit #11
Logan: “Who’s the jackass that gave me this clunker to get over the mountains with, anyway?”
Voice on the radio: “That’d be you, Logan." ~Wolverine/Hulk #1
On Love…
Sean:"Moira darlin', want to take a jog around the island?"
Moira:"Perish the thought."
Sean:"Want to fool about then?" ~Uncanny X-Men #133
Wolverine: “A gift, little one. From a friend. Something to remember him by.”
Mariko: “It is very beautiful, Wolverine-San. And so are you.” Uncanny X-Men #120
Nightcrawler: “I know you have my Bamf doll to keep you company and protect you, but I thought---this being Christmas and all-- you might, for a change….prefer the real thing.”
Amanda Sefton: “Yum!” Uncanny X-Men #168
Kitty: “I wish I was older.”
Peter: “So do I.”
Kitty: “You’re fooling, right? Humoring the kid, to perk up her spirits?”
Peter: I knew precisely what you meant, Katya. I have never been more serious.” Uncanny X-Men #165
Tigra (while looking at Logan like he‘s a big, juicy steak): “Cheer up bunkies! No sense letting doom-an’-gloom rule the day…”
Wolverine: “Back off Lady Cat. I ain’t in the mood.” Uncanny X-Men #155
Amanda: “You, Mr. Wagner, are one sweet, sexy guy.”
Kurt: “If so, Ms. Sefton, why stop?”
Amanda: “We came to see the ballet, not get arrested for public naughtiness.” Uncanny X-Men #178
Bobby: "Aww, she's going to strike out!"
Domino: "I guess you'd know all about that, wouldn't you, Drake?"
Peter: “I am not very good at writing letters. It is difficult for me to express my thoughts and feelings on paper…but for you, Kitty, I will try.” Uncanny X-Men #151
Logan: “Love, who needs it? Me.” Uncanny X-Men #120
Charles: “What do you suggest?”
Lilandra: “We could play doctor.” Uncanny X-Men #171
Warren: “We keep this up, Jean, and we’re liable to make Scott jealous.”
Candy Southern: “Keep it up, Wings, and ‘Scott’ is the least of your worries.” Uncanny X-Men #132
Lorna: “I’ve a better idea.” (kisses Alex)
Alex: “A woman after my own heart.”
Lorna: “Among other things.” Uncanny X-Men #158
Harmony Young: “I like having guys around, especially when they’re cute.”
Kitty: “What’s she talking about? Colossus isn’t ‘cute’.” Uncanny X-Men #159
That Charmer…
Sekmet Conoway: “A-Plus for enterance, B-Minus for tush.”
Remy: “B-Minus?”
Sekmet Conoway: “Tuxes are gorgeous on a guy, but you usual wardrobe…is…bulging…in certain spots.”~Gambit #10
Remy seeing a girl about to fall: “Escape/damsel in distress/escape/damsel in distress…” Picks saving the girl “LeBeau, you’re so predictable!”~Gambit #1
Remy: “Sorry ‘bout stealin’ your stuff. Bye!”~Gambit #1
Andrea VonStrucker: "Looking edible LeBeau.”
Remy: “Pshaw, Andrea, y’always been so subtle.”~ Gambit #10
Remy: “Why not lay off de face for a bit? You might not t’ink so, but dere be a number of girlies who won’t be happy if you go an’ bruise it up!”~ Gambit #25
Stewardess: “We’re about to land sir. Do you need help fastening your seat belt?”
Remy: “Need…or want?”~Gambit #2
Remy: “Missed me, missed me, now ya gotta kiss me…”~Gambit #2
Remy: “Look Mambo, it’s not dat I don’t want to repay you and all, but revenge ain’t ‘sactly my area of expertise. Heartbreak, yes…revenge, no. Now you want I should steal somethin’…”~Gambit #25
Coined Catch Phrases
"I'm the best at what I do"~Wolverine
"Oh my Stars and Garters"~Beast
Family Ties
Corsair: “Very nice flying, son. I couldn’t have done better myself.”
Scott: “My name is Cyclops, mister. You haven’t the right to call me anything else.” Uncanny X-Men #154
Remy: “Every time I think my family’s dysfunctional there’s always a worse one waitin’ around the corner.”~Gambit #11
Jean-Luc: “Perhaps we should allow de bad in our yesterdays t’make a better tomorrow?”
Remy: “Ooh, rife with sub-text.”~Gambit #4
Corsair (to Scott): “Right now though, you too big and grown up…to give your old man a hug?” Uncanny X-Men #167
Places
"In Casablanca--in the good old days--everybody went to Rick's. Where deals were cut and hearts broken. In Madripoor, it's the Princess Bar. Where the intrigue's on a par with the food an' comes in a lot more variety." ~Wolverine #8
"Nothin' cleanses the soul like gettin' back to your roots. Especially my roots. Mainly 'cause I can't remember half of 'em. That's what brings me back to Canada, back to Buffalo Woods State Park in Northern Alberta. Nearest concentration o' human habitation's a hundred miles away as the crow flies." ~Wolverine #34
"It's just a bit o' greenery in the middle of the city...but Central Park is a jungle in its own way. Folks with a keen survival instinct stay away from it at night. They're afraid o' the things that go runnin' through the underbrush...and howl at the moon."~ Wolverine #43
Alex: “Hey guys, if anyone’s interested in a real head-banger of a road trip, I’ve heard of this island where anything goes. Place called Madripoor.”
Logan: “Forget it. You boys aren’t old enough.” Uncanny X-Men #245
Senses of Humor
Betsy: "For an Angel of Death, you have quite the sense of humor."
Warren: "Says the ninja assassin."
Disclaimer: Any images and/or quotes pertaining to X-Men and Marvel are copyright© Marvel. Listing them here for entertainment purposes only.
