(FADEIN to a press conference before the show. Sweet Melissa is at the podium and is currently delivering a speech to the reporters that are gathered around.)

M: I know Tabu didn’t beat Eddy Love for control of the company, but Eddy needed a lot of help to make it happen…and even after that, Tabu still had the sense of mind to but his foot on the ropes. Hellfighter, your poor officiating cost Erik Zieba the control of his company…I know you and Tabu have unfinished business, but was this match where you needed to take out your aggression? I don’t know, maybe I am all wrong on this.

But that is old news, nothing we can do to change it. SSN is in control and since taking over they have already pitted two of the thorns in their side against each other, down the line, and that is Rob Sampson, the Federation Champion against my man, Tabu. These two met before and I saw the match, it was a spectacle. Everyone knows Tabu’s love for tables…but he took it a little too far in the Double Table match they had months ago. Now it’s time to return the favor, so to speak…and Sampson you better believe Tabu will be ready...I am sure you will be too. Now any of you have any questions?

R1: Melissa, tonight Tabu faces off against “Furious” Jesse Falcon, the self-proclaimed “most intelligent man in sports entertainment”. How do you feel Tabu fares against him?

M: (Smiling and looking as beautiful as ever.) He may THINK he is the most intelligent man, but he is pitted against the most intelligent WOMAN! It’s true, Tabu doesn’t have a lot going on in his head, but that is where I come in. Tabu has sat down, reviewed footage, he knows Falcon is a great athlete…but does he really have what it takes against a psycho inside of a steel cage? I guess the question will be answered tonight. Never the less, Falcon is about to meet up with the TRUE FURY in EWI and that is TABU!

R2: Last night Tabu took on Justin Sane, in the first round. He has wrestled athletes of different caliber his entire career, but never on back to back nights. Do you think this will be a factor?

M: Oh I wish you reporters would do your homework before you asked me questions like this. For three years Tabu competed and won the King of Death Match tournament in Japan. Those guys don’t breaks at night and pick up the next day…he beat 4 men in 1 night, not only that, but in some of the most brutal contests anyone has ever laid their eyes on. Rent the tapes, buy the DVD, I am not making this up. This man is tuned up for a tournament like this and the fact that he got to rest up over the night, only increase his chances. Next question and then we will have to wrap this up.

R3: Yes, Melissa, I must say you look great today. Now that I have that out of the way, is there any truth to the Internet rumors that you are really working with SSN, and being with Tabu is just a plot against him?

M: First you give me a compliment and then you insult me? If you watched any of the shows for the past few months, then you know that I can’t stand SSN and I despise Eddy Love. Tabu came to my rescue and I have helped him out as well. Our relationship is strictly business and we need each other, simple as that. Gottfried and Dastardly may not like hearing this, but we have plans to shut them down and in due time, they will be revealed. I have to get going and prep Tabu for his match tonight. Falcon, good luck…you are going to need it!

(Sweet Melissa leaves the podium and a few reporters are still trying to ask question.)


[Gemini steps out of a cab backstage, pausing for a second to hand the cabbie a twenty.]

Gemini: Keep the change.

Cabbie: Thanks. Good luck tonight...uh... misters...

[Gemini hauls a large duffelbag out of the back of the cab, the side stamped with Michigan State Mental Hospital. He tosses it over his shoulder and slams the door. The cab pulls away from the curb and Gemini looks towards the arena with a shrug. Gemini is still dressed in street clothes, bluejeans, a greyish black sweatshirt and a pair of beat up running shoes. A Chicago White Sox cap is perched precariously on his head, concealing his trademark short/long white/black hairstyle. The sweatshirt is baggy and large, concealing most of Gemini's overly large left arm. He looks pretty low key, and seems to be trying to keep a low profile as he heads in the back door of the arena. Gemini sticks his head in the back door, looking left then right, he ignores the camera and quickly strides down the hallway. He looks around quickly for an area to change, a door flies open in front of him and Gemini nearly collides with Ash. Gemini deftly steps aside, avoiding slamming into Ash by a few centimeters. Ash is briefly surprised by Gemini, then his eyes narrow and he blows a cloud of smoke out at Gemini.]

Ash: Watch your step there two face. Nearly ran me over. What's the flippin hurry?

Gemini: We're trying to duck Marcus and his crew of SSN suckups. He doesn't want us in the tournement. Apparently we don't fit his demographics...

[Ash narrows his eyes and purses his lips. He spits to the side in disgust before he speaks to Gemini again.]

Ash: I can relate to that. That (BEEEP)head Gottfried isn't real (BEEP)ing happy with me either. (Takes a drag on the ciggarrette.) You might wanna head on down that way... I don't think anyone in the crew is using that area.

Gemini: Really? Thanks Ash. We appreciate that. (Gemini turns and heads down the hallway.)

Ash: Yo two face!

Gemini: (Turning) What?

Ash: Don't think we're friends or nothin... If I hit you in that tournement, I'll kick your ass just like I would anyone else. Got it?

Gemini: (Smirking) Of course, Ash, we wouldn't have it any other way.


[The scene opens with Dark Carnival members, Kevin Powers and Apocalypse enter the arena. Neither looks extremely happy.]

GM: Uh oh!  Look who's out on bail!

[The team continues walking down the hallway, when a large red rubber ball hits Apocalypse in the head. A voice can be heard off screen saying, "Dude, you got 'im!" Apocalypse looks around to see who threw the ball when, suddenly, The Thrill Killas, Bump Daddy J and Big Thrilla come out of nowhere and deliver a beating to The Dark Carnival. J throws Powers into the wall while Big Thrilla nails Apocalypse over the head with a chair. The Thrill Killas stand over their downed opponents when the larger men start to get to their feet. Bump Daddy and Thrilla look at each other and simultaneously scream "Run away!" before running down the hallway.]



[The camera cuts to the interior of Roberts Stadium in Evansville, Indiana. As the camera pans around it picks up tens of thousands of screaming EWI fans waving their signs and sounding off with several chants for their favorite stars while Bionic Jive's "Ricochet" plays throughout the arena. The camera then cuts to Brett Sanders and Garrett MacFarland who are in the announcer's booth getting ready for tonight's action.]

BS: Welcome to another edition of Heatwave in Evansville! Yes, that's right, we're in Evansville again and boy do we have a great show lined up for you as we present Round 2 of EWI's King of the Cage tournament!

GM: But what about Gemini?  He's one of my favorites in this tournament and it looks like he has a monkey on his back by the name of SSN.

BS: Relax, Garrett. He'll hold his own.  Gemini has a way of doing that.

GM: Yeah, well...he better!

BS: Is it okay with you if we have some matches now?

GM: Eh, sure...why not?

BS: You're so good to us. Tonight's first match is a pretty darn good one if you ask me as it will feature former Intercontinental champion, Brad Striker, taking on former Cruiserweight champion, Inferno. This should be a solid match, Garrett.

GM: Brad Striker's putting Inferno out of this tournament. 'Nuff said.

BS: Before we go to the ring, we have pre-recorded comments from Brad Striker.

(The camera shows a close-up of a wooden door with a sign on it with the name "Superstar" Brad Striker and a huge gold star below it. Suddenly there is a huge bang and an axe blade smashes through the door, sending splinters of wood everywhere! The axe pounds on the door again and again until there is a large hole in the top half. Striker shoves his head through the hole, a manic grin on his face.)

STRIKER: Here's Bradley!

(Brad Striker uses the axe again before kicking the remains of the door off its hinges. He steps through the doorway and stands, hands on hips and chest puffed out. The former Intercontinental champion is dressed head to toe in a firefighter's outfit, complete with yellow helmut and a large red axe. The safety visor on the helmut keeps sliding down over his face as Striker poses for the camera. He finally has enough and takes it off, throwing it across the corridor. He has a very serious look on his face.)

STRIKER: The sports entertainment world has been buzzing with excitement after my triumphant return at Heatwave where I re-established myself as THE number one box office attraction in the EWI/SSN universe. My telephone has been ringing off the hook with movie offers, book deals and other multi-million dollar offers for various public appearances but I have shunned them all for one thing, round 2 of King of the Cage. I know what you're thinking, why is a talented and charismatic athlete like Brad Striker doing carrying on competing in this barbaric tournament. Well, despite being a bona fide megastar never let it be said that I've forgotten the little people. I know that I have proven that I am the best the King of the Cage has to offer and could drop out right now but what about the other guys in this competition? Who am I to deprive non-entities in this business like Inferno from getting the chance to spend time in the same ring as Brad Striker? I feel that by competing against Inferno in the second round I am giving something back to the wrestling world, the business that has served me so well thus far. Heck, I've even dressed especially for the occassion. When I was told I'd be fighting Inferno I thought I'd be prepared, hence the firefighter's outfit! Who say's I don't take my opponents seriously? So, Inferno, I want you to give it your all out there when that bell goes. Pull out all the stops to beat me because I won't be holding back. Then, when we've given a good show to my legions of Strikerettes, I can put you in the Final Insult and you can beg for mercy like all the other losers have here in the EWI!

(Brad Striker gives a big toothy smile to the camera and a thumbs up sign. He swings his large red axe in the air and then rests it on his right shoulder before heading off down the corridor.)

BS: Brad Striker seems pretty determinied.

GM: He's honing his killer instinct more and more lately. He could very well win this thing.

BS: Indeed, and now we bring you that match as promised.


Second Round Matches for The King of the Cage


Inferno vs 'Superstar' Brad Striker

6' 1', 210lbs. | 6' 0', 227lbs.

Pittsburga, PA | Hollywood, California, USA

‘Pollution' - Limp Bizkit | ‘Mindfields' - The Prodigy


[The lights go out and blue pyrotechnics and red flames shoot from the ramp as "Pollution" by Limp Bizkit cues up. Clips of Inferno during several matches including hardcore matches, ladder, and cage matches flash on the 'Extreme Screen'. All heads are turned towards the ramp. Suddenly, spotlights redirect everyone's vision towards the opposite side of the arena, way up towards the roof. Inferno stands there, hands on his hips, and a smirk on his face. His hair is pulled back into a tight ponytail and he wears a white wife beater and baggy blue jeans. He also sports some kind of harness. A cable is lowered from the cieling, spanning the width of the arena. It has a considerable amount of slack in it and hangs down to the cage. Inferno hooks up to some sort of glider system and zips down the cable. He touches down lightly, stopping himself with one foot on the cage. He stradles the top bars before connecting and pulls a mic from his back pocket.]

IN: 'Ferno is in da house. So bring it on! Inferno is met with a loud face pop. He smirks as the lights come back on and the music/video cuts out.

IN: Now, looks like I made it to Round 2. Something that nobody, except for my die hard fans, thought could happen. I did it against advise from doctors, friends, and even some of the uppers in EWI. Now, it looks as though I go head to head against an opponent I have never faced. Brad Striker. From what I know up here though...

[Inferno taps the side of his head.]

IN: he is a formidable opponent. Hell, if I'm right, he did beat Jeffery Roberts, one of my all-time favorite enemies. Well, looks like I'll be put to the test tonight, but don't you doubt that his skills will be hard put to match me tonight, too. I ain't gonna take this laying down. I'm moving on to Round 3 at all costs and there ain't nobody that's gonna stop me. Not Striker, not the Calab-O, not Godfried, not anybody!

[Inferno pauses, as if in thought, before grinning broadly.]

IN: Speaking of the Calab-O, I'd just like to give a hand to Zero for his aid in our battle. It was him and I who pulled it out at the end for the win and it was the Calab-O that went down hard. But anyways, back to the match. This whole concept ain't new to me, and I'm willing to bet it isn't anything new to Striker either, but...hey. There isn't nothing left to say. So all Brad has to do now is to BRING IT ON!

[The crowd gives a loud face pop as Inferno tosses the mic down to the ring announcer. He then turns to look at the ramp, along with the rest of the crowd, and awaits the arrival of Brad Striker.]

Striker makes his entrance and climbs into the cage. Inferno gets the upper hand from the start and nails Striker with a vertical suplex. Leg drop by Inferno. He pulls Striker up sends him into the ropes. Striker ducks a clothesline from Inferno and hits him with a neckbreaker. Asai moonsault by Striker but Inferno lifts his knees. Striker holds his ribs in pain and Inferno nails him with a one-hand bulldog. Inferno attempts a pin but Striker kicks out after two. Inferno pulls Striker up and attempts a DDT, but Striker turns it into a snap suplex. He pulls Inferno up and whips him into the ropes. Kick to the gut by Stiker. He goes for a powerbomb, but Inferno reverses it into a huricarana. Both men are down. They get up at the same time and begin exchanging punches. Striker blocks one of Inferno's punches and nails him in the head. Drop kick by Striker. Inferno stumbles back into the ropes and as he bounces off, Striker goes for a clothesline but misses and Inferno takes him down with a German suplex. Inferno pulls Striker up and sends him into the ropes and goes for a clothesline but misses. Striker bounds off of the opposing rope and hits Inferno with a high knee / facebreaker followed by the Superstar Slam (Rocker Dropper) for the three-count.

Winner: 'Superstar' Brad Striker


BS: Brad Striker advances to Round 3 of the King of the Cage tournament!

GM: I knew it all along.

BS: Of course you did. Moving right along, it's now time for your man, Gemini, to wrestle Cameron Cruise to see which of them will advance to Round 3.

GM: It's no secret that I like Gemini. He's my pick.

BS: And not a bad one either, but he's going up against Cameron Cruise, who is the EWI Intercontinental champion.

GM: So?

BS: Never mind. [Sighs.] Go to the ring.


Gemini vs Cameron Cruise

6' 2', 245lbs. | 6' 4', 225lbs.

Purgatory | Tampa Bay, FL

‘Beautiful People' - Marilyn Manson | ‘Don't Tread On Me' - Metallica


Cruise starts off with a barray of punches on Gemini. He sends Gemini into the ropes and catches him with a quick vertical suplex. Gemini gets to his fet and ducks a clothesline attempt and takes Cruise down with a belly-to-back suplex. Gemini with a dragon-whip takedown. Cruise holds his leg in pain. Gemini brnigs a knee down on the injured leg of Cruise. He goes for a second but Cruise miraculously moves out of the way and rolls out of the ring. Gemini taunts Cruise and Cruise slides into the ring and ducks a clothesline attempt from Gemini. Cruise bounds off of the ropes and takes Gemini out with a dropkick. Cruise lands hard on his injured leg and both men are down. Both get up at the same time and exchange a series of punches. Gemini blocks a punch from Cruise and nails Cruise in the face with a hard right. He nails two more and spins Cruise around and hits him with a spine punch. Cruise holds his back and stumbles, nearly faling and Gemini hits him with a bulldog and locks on the Torquemada on the knee of Cruise's injured leg. Cruise quickly taps out.

Winner: Gemini


BS: Gemini advances in the tournament! Cruise put up a fight but that nagging knee injury...

GM: Which was caused by Gemini!

BS: ...proved to be a factor that Cruise couldn't overcome. We'll have to wait and see if that injury is a factor in Cruise's title defense against Cole Steele on Shockwave.

GM: What are you kidding? Of course it will! SSN will finally reclaim what they should never have lost in the first place.

BS: Well that's your opinion, but you know what they about opinions.

GM: No...what?

BS: That they're like...well...never mind. Let's just say everyone has one and move right along to our next match. Zero will take on Keith Rotten. Both of these men are fairly new to EWI still, but have made an impressive impact so far.

GM: I sorta like Zero, but I just have a feeling that tells Keith Rotten is the man that's going to advance.

BS: Well, you're batting a thousand so far tonight. Let's go to some pre-recorded comments from Rotten before we go to the ring.

(Fade in on the exterior of a large warehouse. Some loud music can be heard, but it is somewhat muffled, due to the distance. The camera enters through a large door. Inside, a large mosh pit is going on, people slamming into each other and tagediving. A band plays heavy metal music on stage. The camera manuvers itself through the ground, getting knocked back and forth all the way. On the opposite side of the building is a bar. Tables are set up and people are hanging out, drinking, smokng, and listening to music. Finally, the camera spots "The Clash" Keith Rotten. He is wearing all black and a studded dog collar around his neck. He is sitting at the end of a table, drinking a beer and is surrounded by a large group of people. One cute girl, dressed in tight leather, is sitting on his lap. They are listening to them intently.)

Keith Rotten: (Not noticing the camera for a second.) So, I throw open the door and sent the bitch flying! (Everyone around him laughs. Rotten then notices the camera.) Oh, its you. For god sakes, can I get one moment of peace from you people. Baby, can you get me another beer while I take care of some business?

Girl on Keith's lap: Sure sweetie. (Gives him a kiss, jumps up and goes to the bar.)

Keith Rotten: Well, I rolled through Major Deluxe rather quickly, so lets see if "Southern Fox" Zero is anymore of a challenge. I doubt it. If there's one thing I can't stand more then bleeding Yankees, It's a bloody redneck. I'm gonna beat your hick ass all over the cage and...

(He is interuppted by a large man, 6'6, 320lbs, hovering over him and tapping him on the shoulder. He looks very mean and meanacing. Rotten looks up.)

Keith Rotten: Sod off. I'm cutting a promo.

Large Guy: Your one of those wrestlers running around town, aren't ya.

Keith Rotten: Not that it's any of your business, but yeah, I'm a wrestler.

Large Guy: Wrestling ain't real. All you guys are a bunch of losers who couldn't make it in real sports.

Keith Rotten: (Suprisingly keeping his cool, barely looking at the guy) Is that so?

Large Guy: It is.

Keith Rotten: Would you care to step outside?

Large Guy: (Laughing) Ok, but this is real. Once we go outside, there won't be a referee to break it up.

Girl who is sitting on Keith's lap: Here's your beer. (hands him a bottle of beer)

Keith Rotten: thanks. (Takes a sip)

Large Guy: What are you waiting for, lets go!

Keith Rotten: Give me a sec, I don't want to have sent the lovely lady to the bar for nothing. (He chugs the rest of the beer and stands up.)

Large Guy: OK, lets go. I'm gonna kick your ass!

Keith Rotten: Which way?

Large Guy: Jeeze, follow me.

(Large Guy turns around and heads for a back door. As he opens the door and is about to step outside, Rotten takes his empty beer bottle and breaks it over the Large Guys head. Large Guy stumbles and falls against the opposite wall of the alleyway.)

Keith Rotten: Man, you are a stupid son of a bitch.

(He begins to kick the large guy, who is now screaming and profusely bleeding from the head. He picks the large guy up and slams his head into a wall. The large guy goes limp and Rotten stands over him.)

Keith Rotten: Southern Fox, remember this: I will do anything to win. You seem like a good guy. Too bad nice guys finish last. Oh, and Somekawa, don't think that I've forgetten about you. I'd love to get my hands on you and cripple your dumb ass once and for all. Southern Fox, I'll see you in the cage.


'The Southern Fox' Zero vs "The Clash" Keith Rotten

6' 5', 253lbs. | 6' 3', 237lbs.

Charlotte, NC | Manchester, England

'Everlasting Gaze' - Smashing Pumpkins | 'Anarchy in the U.K.' - Sex Pistols


("The Everlasting Gaze" by Smashing Pumpkins cues up as "The Southern Fox" Zero emerges from the back, accompanied by several white, flickering strobe lights, and welcomed with a nice face pop from the crowd. Dressed for action in a pair of grey wrestling tights, stylized with a red fox logo, red wrestling boots, and white wrist tape, "The Southern Fox" makes his way to the ring, requesting the ring announcer’s microphone before entering the cage.)

Zero: As I’m sure you’ve all heard, "The Clap" Keith Rotten, will be my next opponent in my quest to become the King of the Cage. And when you think about it, who here is more suited to hold that prestigious title than me, that handsome devil from Charlotte, North Carolina?

(Zero grins broadly, his even white teeth showing.)

Zero: Two matches after my debut in Extreme Wrestling International, I was wrestling a Hell in the Cell match. And as you can see from Round 1, I am completely at home in a normal cage. So I’m ready to do what has to be done, against whoever I have to.

(Zero paces around the interior of the cage, pressing his hand against the mesh walls from time to time.)

Zero: And this Keith Rotten fellow. I mean, sheesh, talk about your poor sports. He threw that Japanese guy off the stage just because he hurt his knee. You think you’re all big and tough, and back in England, or wherever the heck you’re from, you probably were. But guess what? This isn’t England. As I’m sure we all know by now, this is Evansville!

(The arena erupts into cheers upon hearing their hometown.)

Zero: Well, Rotty tonight, there’s no stage, and no chairs. Just four walls and me, "The Southern Fox" Zero.

(Zero tosses the microphone back to the ring announcer and awaits his opponent.)

The two combatants exchange punches, with Zero eventually getting the upper hand. He throws Rotten into the ropes and catches him on the rebound with an overhead belly-to-belly suplex. Zero begins to pull Rotten up but Rotten hits him with a low-blow followed by a bulldog. Figure-Four on Zero. The ref checks the Southern Fox but he refuses to give up and eventually gets to the ropes. Rotten sends Zero into the ropes and misses a clothesline attempt. Cross body by Zero, but Rotten turns it into a fall-away slam. Leg Drop by Rotten. Rotten pulls Zero up and goes for a Fisherman suplex, but it is blocked. Crucifix DDT by Zero followed by an Asai Moonsault! Zero goes for his finisher, Zero Tolerance, but Rotten has his hand on the ropes. Zero pulls Rotten up and goes for a suplex, but Rotten blocks it and nails Zero with a series of forearm blows. Rotten pulls Zero up and hits him with a spinning neckbreaker (Punked Out) for the pin.

Winner: "The Clash" Keith Rotten


BS: Keith Rotten advances, but Zero put up a good fight. It really could have gone either way.

GM: But it didn't, and I was right again.

BS: Yes, you were. Want a cookie?

GM: I'd prefer a rat for after the show.

BS: Well I wouldn't know anything about that. I'm a happily married man.

GM: The words "happily" and "married" don't belong together.

BS: Oh shut up already. Let's go to the ring for another match as Toshiro Somekawa takes on ExE.

GM: I can't believe you told me to shut up...


Toshiro Somekawa vs ExE

5' 10', 228lbs. | 6' 4', 240lbs.

Akihabra, Japan | Toronto, Canada

'Take It' - Insane Clown Posse | 'Get Extreme' - ExE


Toshiro Somekawa enters the arena first to a huge cheer from the fans. ExE enters next the arena next as the crowd boos loudly. ExE enters the ring and charges Toshiro before the bells sounds, catching his man by surprise. ExE knocks Toshiro to the mat with a running clothesline and puts the boots to Toshiro. ExE then uses the ropes for leverage as he drapes a knee across the throat of Toshiro. A evil grin comes across the face of ExE, as he continues to choke Toshiro. ExE releases the hold and starts to climb up the cage.

BS: Looks like ExE is trying to make this a quick match.

GM: Yawn.

Toshiro is quick to his feet and catches ExE about half way up the cage. Toshiro grabs a leg and yanks, causing ExE to straddle the top turnbuckle. Toshiro bounces the top rope as ExE rides for dear life. ExE finally gets thrown and falls between the ropes and the cage. Toshiro shoots off the far ropes and come flying in with a devastating cross block that sends ExE back first into the cage. Toshiro pulls ExE into the ring and hits a dragon suplex. Toshiro crawls to the corner, but ExE grabs a ankle just as he’s about to exit the ring.

BS: Nice save by ExE.

GM: Would they just end this match already? It’s boring.

ExE trips up Toshiro and applies a odd looking ankle lock. Toshiro kicks ExE off and gets to his feet, hitting ExE with a spinning heel kick as he gets to his feet. Toshiro drops a knee and pulls Exe up to his feet and Irish whips him, no reversal by ExE. Toshiro comes off the ropes with a flying lariat that sends ExE for a loop. Somekawa quickly follows up with a brain buster and then applies his Burning Dawn submission hold and ExE quickly submits.

Winner: Toshiro Somekawa


BS: Toshiro Somekawa picks up a win and advances in the tournament, and it looks like he'll be facing Keith Rotten in a rematch of sorts to see who advances to Round 4.

GM: Somekawa's a great competitor, but Rotten really impressed me much more during his match.

BS: It will be a great match either way. Fans, I understand our cameras have caught up with Marcus Gottfried in the back, so let's go back there now.

[Marcus Gottfried and Saul E Dangerously stand in the backstage area. Marcus stands calmly, surveying the frenzied activity backstage, a sour look on his face. Saul stands a few feet away, almost jubilant in direct contrast to Gottfrieds bitter look. He observes the frantic coming and goings of the technical staff happily, but the unhappy demeanor of Marcus finally breaches his calm facade and he turns to Marcus to speak.]

SED: Marcus, what's the problem? You look like you're sucking on lemons.

MG: What's wrong? What's wrong? We still don't have the world title, those idiots in the Dark Carnival and the Mechanical Weasels...

SED: Animals Marcus, Animals...

MG: Whatever! Those four idiots wreaking havoc at the last show, and then that FREAK pushing me around backstage! I don't want a.. a.. mental case like that in my federation! I don't want him in this tournement! He's not good for ratings and he's driving me nuts!

SED: Marcus, after all this you're still not happy? These things take time, but now it's all swinging our way! Zieba is gone! Love is GOING to pin Hellfighter for the title! It's all coming around!

MG: For the amount of money I'm paying you Saul, it shouldn't take this long!

SED: (Irritated) Look, Marcus, if it makes you happy, I'll take care of the whole Gemini situation. I'll get rid of him. He won't be on anymore cards, he won't bother you anymore. I guarantee it. Ok?

MG: Now that would put a smile on my face. Take care of it, and I will be a happy man.

SED: How happy?

MG: (Suddenly irritated.) I already pay you far more than you are worth, so don't even start!

SED: Marcus, Marcus, Marcus... you will NEVER pay me what I am worth.

MG: Right. Anyway, you remember that Falcon kid running around last night acting like Timmy from South Park? Well, I watched the tape to find out why he was acting so damn strange in my office. The jerkoff had “SSN Sucks” written on his stomach, then he ran out of my office saying EWI Rules…that doesn’t rest well with me. He insulted the boss and I want you to make him pay…you got that?

187: Yes sir, no problem. I have a favor I am sure you will grant me, regarding Angelus.

MG: Don’t sweat that, he is cooling his heels off in jail, but when he gets back….(Smiles) I have plans for him. (Chuckles) Don’t you worry.

{As the camera fades out of that scene it quickly fades back in on the announcer's table and the two sitting at it.}

BS: Well, it looks as if Saul E. Dangerously is looking to get rid of Gemini.

GM: Easier said than done. I wish Gemini would do the right thing already!

BS: You mean...wrestle for the fans?

GM: Hell no! I mean he should join SSN!

BS: [Sighs.] I should have known.

GM: Yes, you should have.

BS: I understand the Thrill Killas have requested some interview time, so let's go up to the ring for that.

[Bif Naked's "We're Not Gonna Take It" begins to play and The Thrill Killas make their way out to the ring as the crowd boos loudly. Thrilla and J retrieve a pair of microphones and adress the capacity crowd.]

BT: People of Evansville, we appreciate the fact that you would boo the heinosity that is The Dark Carnival, but J and I would like you to know that we're okay!

[Thrilla gives the okay sign to the crowd.]

BDJ: Now, last week we made our debut and easily beat a team that reeked of suckitude by the name of Twin Phoenix! But for some reason, Apocalisp and "Good Golly" decided to get up in our grill! What up wit dat, bro?

BT: Only thing I can guess is that they're TOTALLY jealous of us, B Diddy!

BDJ: Totally! I mean, we got to get in the ring with a couple of chicks and even though they were totally woof-o-matic, at least they look better than those hoes that chill with the mutha humpin' Carnival!

BT: No diggity! Those bitches reek of complete ugliosity!

BDJ: Know what I think, dude?

BT: Wha?

BDJ: I think that the Dark Carnival needs to take a vacation to Coolsville so that they know what it means to be crazy funky cool playaz like the Thrill Killas!

BT: Oh I don't think they can hang with da Thrill Killas, dude. I mean, they might be bigger than us, but they're not BIGGER than us, if ya know what I mean. And after all, the rats always say that size TOTALLY matters!

BDJ: Dude, but they wouldn't know about that.... IF ya know what I mean. Wickity-wickity-whack!

BT: Catchphrases rule!

BDJ: Totally!

[Bump Daddy J is about to go for a high five when "Play With Me" by Insane Clown Posse cues up and Kevin Powers and Apocalypse run out on the entrance ramp.]

BDJ: Dude! Let's make a like a banana and leave!

[The Thrill Killas run out of the ring and escape through the crowd as the Dark Carnival runs towards the ring, chasing them off.]

GM: Is it just me or is The Dark Carnival afraid of The Thrill Killas?

BS: Were you watching the same thing I was?

GM: Of course!

BS: Riiiight. Up next we have Ash taking on Ruiner. Your thoughts, Garrett?

GM: I'm gonna go out on a limb...and predict Ruiner to pull off an upset.

BS: Interesting... Let's go to the ring.


Home|Next