Healing the Feminine Self

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Regardless of the gender we are expressing in this incarnation, we all have both male and female aspects of self. In fact, the qualities that we choose to call either male or female really have little to do with our chosen gender type. To be and express our whole self is to incorporate all of the aspects stereotypically relegated to gender, such as, assertiveness, ambition, intuition, or the ability of logic, into a cohesive whole. The process of becoming acquainted with one's various aspects requires a curiosity about the mythical archetypes that have been relegated to our unconscious minds, and a desire to integrate those archetypes. Reclaiming those parts of self that have been relegated to the attic of our psyches is not an easy task and the individual willing to undergo such self mastery is courageous. By making the effort to understand our myths and archetypes, we can move beyond fragmentation and truly express our whole selves.

Feminine aspects of self have been relegated to the dark side or negative aspect of human nature in patriarchal society, however, that was not always so. The reemergence of Goddess worship reflects the age old Divine Mother worship that was prominent around the world thousands of years ago. The Goddess was respected as the source of life, and power within those societies was based on the responsibility of motherhood. During that era, men and women lived harmoniously in an egalitarian society, where the division of labor was based on need and both genders were respected. The Goddess represented all things from birth to death, and societies based on community, peace and acceptance of all people resulted with her worship. As patriarchal attitudes became prominent in society and religion, the great source of energy that was attributed to women became relegated to a negative connotation of the human condition.

Mythology contains the thread of humanity's many aspects or qualities about wholeness. The goddess mythology found in cultures all around the world contain those threads or links to our unconscious aspects of our feminine self. As patriarchal values became ingrained in society, the many aspects of the Goddess can still be seen in ancient myths or stories. In GODDESSES IN EVERY WOMAN, the author, Jean Bolen, presented the seven Greek goddesses, Athena, Artemis, Hestia, Hera, Demeter, Persephone, and Aphrodite, into three different categories to signify their qualities, which reflect aspects of personality. Athena, Artemis, and Hestia represent three different qualities found in the virgin goddess archetype. The virgin goddess archetype reflects qualities of one who is focused on her own accomplishments with little concern to the collective social and cultural norms of a woman's place. Hera, Demeter, and Persephone represent qualities found in the vulnerable goddess archetype. The vulnerable goddess archetype reflects the need for affiliation. It is significant that each of these goddesses represents victimized and abused women.

Bolen, uses the personality types represented by the vulnerable and virgin goddesses to depict qualities in women after thousands of years of being possessions in a dominant male society.

Like human women in one-down, suffer-and-be-powerless situations, all three vulnerable goddesses also showed psychiatric symptoms. The women who resemble these goddesses inwardly and who have diffuse awareness as a mode of consciousness are also susceptible to victimization. In contrast, the goddesses associated with the capacity to define boundaries and aim for goals (Artemis) or think through problems and devise strategies (Athena) that require focused consciousness are the virginal, invulnerable goddesses. The women who are like them are less likely to be victims.
GODDESSES IN EVERY WOMAN

On closer examination, we have all known times when we have let our need for relationship interfere with our desires and dreams. I can remember female friends that dropped out of the feminine social world when a new boyfriend came into the picture, only to reappear when she was no longer affiliated with the guy. That behavior remains the norm for many women regardless of their age or career status. It took many years for me to find women who chose to form support groups to empower and support each other's personal growth. On the other hand, the image of the virgin goddess brings to mind women who choose career over affiliation. These women stay somewhat disconnected from the societal norms of a woman's need for opposite gender relationships, to eliminate the judgment associated with putting their creative needs before relationship. From a psychological perspective, both of these personality types are unable to fully participate in life due to the dominant male orientation found in society.

Aphrodite was able to incorporate the best qualities of the virgin and the vulnerable goddesses and had the power of transformation. Aphrodite creates chemistry between two people, which creates a desire to come together. She brings purely sexual impulses to the fore front, yet this impulse is often deeper, representing an urge that is both psychological and spiritual.

The desire to know and be known is what Aphrodite generates. If this desire leads to physical intimacy, impregnation and new life may follow. If the union is also or either of mind, heart, or spirit, new growth occurs in the psychological, emotional, or spiritual spheres.
GODDESSES IN EVERY WOMAN

The archetypes of the ancient Greek goddesses reflect one culture's attempt to maintain some connection to the Goddess once male dominance became the norm. The Goddess influence has remained but has taken a secondary role as the Mother of God or the consort to God within such religious traditions as Christianity. Both the Virgin Mary and the Magdalena were stripped of their humanness within the patriarchal community, with the result of giving women the message that sexuality and ability to affiliate is in some way dirty or disgusting. To maintain dominance as a societal norm, both women and men have to subject the nurturing, creative, intuitive, sensuous, and supportive parts of their psyches to the shadow or unconscious mind. To review the result of this behavior one only needs to look at the state of our current world, where death and violence have become the norm even amongst our children.