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RETURN TO PARADISE

BY TIMA

CHAPTER

20





RETURN TO PARADISE
chapter 20:

Todd: You don't want to have anything to do with me ever again, remember?

Tea: What if I did? How would you respond this time?

Todd: Probably the same way I did every other time.

Tea: Why should I risk my heart if I know my feelings won't be returned?

Todd: Because, that's what you do, Delgado. You work your ass off trying to convince me that I'm not a monster. I work even harder to convince you that I am. You give up and split on me. I give in and come after you. We do this whole stupid thing all over again.

Tea: It doesn't always go exactly like that.

Todd: Sometimes we do it a little different, but it's still the same routine.

Tea: I'm tired of our routine. I thought maybe you would be by now, too.

Todd: I never get tired of you.

Tea: That sounds almost like a compliment.

Todd: Do you want to see the bed?

Tea: You'll have to work a whole lot harder if you want to charm me into your bed this time, Todd Manning.

Todd: So, there is a chance?

Tea: No.

Todd: Are you trying to make my head explode?

Tea: Why do you want to sleep with me?

Todd: Do you have to ask?

Tea: Is sex the only way you value me?

Todd: No.

Tea: That's good to hear.

Todd: You're also the best damn shyster money can buy.

Tea: This was a mistake.

[Tea angrily moves toward the entrance of the cave. Todd gently grabs her arm, preventing her escape.]

Todd: Wait.

Tea: Why should I?

Todd: You used to do that translating thing for me. It irritated the hell out of me when you did it in front of other people. It's different here. It's just us. Translate for me. Hear what I'm trying to say, instead of what's coming out of my mouth.

Tea: You made it clear in the past that I was only believing what I wanted to believe.

Todd: Well, believe it now.

Tea: I'm through deluding myself.

Todd: You believe in all that love junk. That's the biggest delusion there is.

Tea: I may have deluded myself into believing that you ever had any genuine feelings for me, but love does exist, just not for us.

Todd: Love is a crappy feeling.

Tea: Only when you can't be with the person you love. You have a choice. You can go home right now and make everything okay again.

Todd: You're right. I do have a choice. Don't you get it, Delgado? I have a choice and I'm here.

Tea: Only because Blair wouldn't take you back after your latest idiotic, self-destructive stunt. You're desperately afraid of being alone, so you've decided to settle for me again. That doesn't make me feel special. It just makes me feel very sad for you.

[Todd lets go of her arm and walks away from her.]

Todd: I don't need your pity.

Tea: You need a jeweler. Buy your wife something shiny to distract her from why she's angry at you this time.

Todd: She's not my wife.

Tea: Neither am I.

Todd: There was a time you liked being married to me.

Tea: There was a time when you lied about loving me and I believed you.

Todd: I did love you...I think. That feeling never made any sense to me. But, I remember not feeling as lousy when I was with you.

[Tea looks away. She feels herself being sucked in by his vulnerability again. She wants to soothe his pain but knows that her pain will only increase, as it has in the past, each time she's offered her heart to him.]

Todd: You're born. People stab you in the back about a million times. Then, you die. That's life...except when I'm with you.

Tea: Don't do this.

Todd: I need you.

Tea: They're just words.

Todd: That's what you always wanted.

Tea: I wanted the truth. I wanted honesty, respect, affection. I wanted to be with a man who would take away my loneliness, not gleefully add to it.

Todd: I've never been gleeful about anything in my life. And, I never wanted you to feel lousy about anything.

Tea: How did you want me to feel? How did you expect me to feel when you lied to me about your feelings last summer, only to turn my feelings for you into a joke that only you found the humor in when you left me here to die as you went off to have the life you always dreamed of with another woman?

Todd: I knew you'd be okay.

Tea: You did nothing to make certain of that.

Todd: I let people know where you were so they could get you off this stupid island.

Tea: You waited.

Todd: Not very long.

Tea: No matter how angry I ever am with you, I would never delay sending help for you when your safety is in jeopardy.

Todd: I knew you didn't want off the island right away. I knew how many places you'd want to fuck Rayburn first.

Tea: You just can't be mature about this, can you?

Todd: I'm allowed to be pissed that my wife was fucking a loser like that behind my back.

Tea: I'm your ex-wife. You stranded me on a deserted island with a gorgeous man so you could return to your other ex-wife. I'm allowed to do as much fucking as I want under those circumstances.

Todd: Not with Rayburn.

Tea: Do I get to make a list of who you can't sleep with, too?

Todd: Go ahead.

Tea: Fine! I'll put myself at the top of that list.

Todd: That's not what you want.

Tea: That's what I should want.

Todd: But you don't. Face it, Delgado, you still want me.

to be continued...

***** ***** ***** ***** ***** ***** ***** ***** ***** ***** ***** ***** ***** *****

2004 COPYRIGHT BY TIMA






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