TWENTIETH CENTURY FOX PRESENTS

A BAZMARK PRODUCTION

MOULIN ROUGE!
(Transcribed by Kate Sith)

(The curtain opens, and THE CONDUCTOR takes us through the opening titles.)

PARIS 1900

(TOULOUSE, in his Sitar costume, is sticking out of the window of the windmill above the Moulin Rouge.  A garret with the word “L’ament” can be seen in the background.)

TOULOUSE:
THERE WAS A BOY
A VERY STRANGE, ENCHANTED BOY

(CHRISTIAN’s face appears on screen, smiling, and the fades out.)

THEY SAY HE WANDERED VERY FAR

(Fade to a view of the city of Paris from high up.  We start to zoom into a village called Montmartre, where we pass many different people.)

VERY FAR
OVER LAND AND SEA
A LITTLE SHY

(Voices are heard in the background.)

OLD PRIEST:
Turn away from this village of sin.

(As we move into an alleyway, we see prostitutes and drunks.)

TOULOUSE:
AND SAD OF EYE
BUT VERY WISE WAS HE

(We move up above a sign that says “BAR ABSINTHE” and through the window of the rundown “L’ament” garret.)

AND THEN ONE DAY

(Inside is a bearded Christian sitting on the floor, holding a bottle of alcohol, head in arms.)

A MAGIC DAY, HE PASSED MY WAY

(Christian looks up, gazing painfully at his typewriter across the room and the empty glass next to it.)

AND WHILE WE SPOKE OF MANY THINGS
FOOLS AND KINGS

(Christian sits down at his typewriter, staring at the blank piece of paper he has just put in, in some sort of deep grief.)

THIS HE SAID TO ME:

CHRISTIAN (V.O.):
(As he slowly types the words, and tries to fight back the inevitable tears.)
THE GREATEST THING
YOU’LL EVER LEARN
IS JUST TO LOVE
AND BE LOVED
IN RETURN
The Moulin Rouge.

(We are moving back past the same windmill from before, only it looks much fresher.)

A nightclub,

(We see the inside of the Moulin Rouge; rich men in top hats are dancing with The Diamond Dogs, young can-can dancers and other strange-looking people.)

A dance hall, and a bordello.

(ZIDLER comes out from behind a curtain.)

ZIDLER:
The Moulin Rouge!
(The crowd cheers faintly.)

CHRISTIAN (V.O.):
Ruled over by Harold Zidler, a kingdom of nighttime pleasures.  Where the rich and powerful came to play with the young and beautiful creatures of the underworld.

(We move back over the windmill.)

The most beautiful of all these was the woman I loved.

(SATINE, face in shadow, sits in stage lights with a hat and cigarette.)

Satine.  A courtesan, she sold her love to men.

(We move past The Elephant outside the Moulin Rouge.)

They called her the sparkling diamond.

(The words we hear are appearing on Christian’s typewriter.)

And she was the star of the Moulin Rouge.

(The lit-up MOULIN ROUGE sign flashes in our view, and we’re back to the typing the of what he said.)
(One more flash of the Moulin Rouge and Christian is back at the typewriter again, taking a pause, his tears now flowing freely.)

The woman I loved is…

(Christian looks out his window at the Moulin Rouge across the street.)

…dead.

(A pause, and then he continues typing.)

I first came to Paris one year ago.

(We move out of the lively, dancing Moulin Rouge, back to a view of the entire city.)

It was 1899, the summer of love.  I knew nothing of the Moulin Rouge, Harold Zidler, or Satine.

(We then zoom into the train station, where a slightly younger and more vibrant Christian is getting off the train, holding his bags and gazing about in wonderment.)

The world had been swept up in bohemian revolution and I had traveled from London to be a part of it.

(We can see different parts of the city.)

On a hill near Paris, was the village of Montmartre.

(Christian looks up at the Montmartre sign, eyes sparkling.)

It was not as my father had said:

(Flash to:)

FATHER:
A village of sin!

CHRISTIAN (V.O.):
But the center of the bohemian world!

(In the alley next to the “BAR ABSINTHE” sign, the drunk from before now looks very alive, playing a sitar and singing with other bohemians.)

GUITARIST:
CHILDREN OF THE REVOLUTION

CHRISTIAN (V.O.):
Musicians, painters, writers!  They were known as “The Children of the Revolution.”

(We move up to Christian’s garret.  The sign says “L’amour” and everything looks much less run-down.  Christian is standing in the window.)

Yes, I had come to live a penniless existence.

(Christian is happily setting up his typewriter and preparing to write.)

I had come to write about truth, beauty, freedom and that which I believed in above all things: Love.

(Flash to:)

FATHER:
Always this ridiculous obsession with love!

CHRISTIAN (V.O.):
There was only one problem.

(Freeze frame on Christian’s face.  Uh oh!)

I’d never been in love!

(We see our future Christian’s words on the typewriter.)

Luckily, right at that moment, an unconscious Argentinean fell through my roof.

(Past Christian turns and stands in surprise as THE NARCOLEPTIC ARGENTINEAN falls through his roof.)
(Back to the typewriter.)

He was quickly joined by a dwarf dressed as a nun.

TOULOUSE:
(Walks in through the door, dressed as a nun.)
How do you do?  My name is Henri-Marie-Raymond de Toulouse-Lautrec-Monfa.

CHRISTIAN:
What?

TOULOUSE:
(Working on getting the Argentinean down.)
I’m terribly sorry about all this.  We were just upstairs rehearsing a play.

CHRISTIAN:
What?

CHRISTIAN (V.O.):
(As future Christian types away.)
A play!  Something very modern called Spectacular Spectacular.

TOULOUSE:
And it’s set in Switzerland.

CHRISTIAN (V.O.):
(Types.)
Unfortunately, the unconscious Argentinean suffered from a sickness called Narcolepsy.

TOULOUSE:
(Sitting down at Christian’s typewriter, while Christian examines the Argentinean.)
Perfectly fine one moment, then suddenly (snores) unconscious the next.  (Laughs.)

(The faces of THE DOCTOR, AUDREY, and SATIE appear through the hole from which the Argentinean came.  Toulouse and Christian look up at them.)

SATIE:
How is he?

AUDREY:
How wonderful, now the Narcoleptic Argentinean is now unconscious, and therefore the scenario will not be finished in time to present to the financier tomorrow.

SATIE:
Right, Toulouse.  I still have to finish the music.

TOULOUSE:
We’ll just find someone to read the part.

AUDREY:
Now, where, in heaven’s name, are we going to find someone to read the role of the young, sensitive, Swiss poet goat herder?

(All eyes go to Christian.)

CHRISTIAN (V.O.):
Before I knew it, I was upstairs standing in for the unconscious Argentinean.

(Everyone is now upstairs.  Christian is standing back on a little makeshift hill-set in goat herder clothes watching everyone in extreme confusion, Satie is playing unbelievably annoying music on some loud instrument, Audrey is directing, Toulouse is dancing around and singing in nun’s clothes, The Doctor is doing something odd with lights, and The Argentinean is passed out.)

TOULOUSE:
THE HILLS ARE ABLAZE WITH THE EUPHONIOUS SYMPHONIES OF DESCANT!

AUDREY:
Oh stop, stop!  Stop, stop, stop, stop!
(He goes to Satie.)
That insufferable droning is drowning out my words!  Could we please just stick to a little decorative piano?

CHRISTIAN (V.O.):
(Type, type.)
There seemed to be artistic differences over Audrey’s lyrics to Satie’s style.

THE DOCTOR:
I don’t think a nun would say that about a hill.

SATIE:
What if he sings, “The hills are vital in toning the descant?”

TOULOUSE:
No, no, “The hills quake and shake!”

THE DOCTOR:
No, no, no, no, “The hills…tone…”

ARGENTINEAN:
(Wakes up.)
The hills are incanate with symphonic melodics!
(Passes out.)

(And the babble continues, with everyone saying sentences that start with “The hills,” and end in nonsense, or:)

SATIE:
Frankie is living in my foot.

(Christian seems to have something, but no one’s paying attention, until:)

CHRISTIAN:
THE HILLS ARE ALIVE
WITH THE SOUND OF MUSIC

(Everyone stares in silence.)

ARGENTINEAN:
(Wakes up.)
The hills are alive with the sound of music?  I love it!

(Christian gives a relieved sigh.)

THE DOCTOR:
The hills are alive…

TOULOUSE:
…WITH THE SOUND…

SATIE:
…OF MUSIC
(Turns to Christian.)
It fits perfectly.

CHRISTIAN:
WITH SONGS THEY HAVE SUNG
FOR A THOUSAND YEARS

(Everyone exclaims in amazement.)

TOULOUSE:
Incandiferous!  Audrey…you two should write the show together.

AUDREY:
I beg your pardon?

CHRISTIAN (V.O.):
(Typing.)
But Toulouse’s suggestion that Audrey and I write the show together was not what Audrey wanted to hear.

AUDREY:
(Leaving.)
Goodbye!

TOULOUSE:
Here’s to your first job in Paris.
(Takes a swig of absinthe.)

SATIE:
Toulouse…Zidler will never agree.
(Looks up at the confused Christian.)
No offense, but have you ever written anything like this before?

CHRISTIAN:
(Totally lost.)
No!

ARGENTINEAN:
Bah, the boy has talent!
(Reaches a hand up to Christian, but since Christian is on the ladder still, he winds up with his hand on Little Christian.)

CHRISTIAN:
(Gasp!)

ARGENTINEAN:
I like him!
(Notices the placement and draws his hand back quickly.)
Nothing funny…(Nervous laugh) I just like talent.

TOULOUSE:
(Huddling with the other bohos, while Christian tries to listen in.)
The hills are alive with the sound of music.  See, Satie, with Christian we can write a truly bohemian revolutionary show that we’ve always dreamt of!

SATIE:
But how will we convince Zidler?

CHRISTIAN (V.O.):
(Typing.)
But Toulouse had a plan…

TOULOUSE:
…Satine…

CHRISTIAN:
Satine…?

(They glance back at Christian, in the midst of their planning, who gives them a nervous smile like he’s not extremely curious about what they’re saying.)

CHRISTIAN (V.O.):
(Typing, naturally)
They would dress me in the Argentinean’s best suit and pass me off as a famous English writer.  Once Satine had my modern poetry, she would be astounded and insist to Zidler that I write Spectacular Spectacular.

TOULOUSE:
(Saying similar things in the background.)

CHRISTIAN (V.O.):
(Typity typity type type)
The only problem was, I kept hearing my father’s voice in my head!

(Flash to:)

THE FATHER:
You’ll end up wasting your life at the Moulin Rouge with a can-can dancer!

CHRISTIAN:
(Starting to freak out as Toulouse is gushing over him)
I can’t write the show for the Moulin Rouge!!
(Runs to the hole in the floor and starts to climb back down to his garret)

(The Bohos stop him.)

TOULOUSE:
Why not?

CHRISTIAN:
I don’t even know if I am a true bohemian revolutionary!

BOHOS:
What!?

TOULOUSE:
Do you believe in beauty?

CHRISTIAN:
Yes…

ARGENTINEAN:
Freedom?

CHRISTIAN:
Yes, of course.

SATIE:
Truth?

CHRISTIAN:
…Yes.

THE DOCTOR:
Love?

CHRISTIAN:
Love?  Love…above all things, I believe in love.  Love is like oxygen.  Love is a many splendored thing.  Love lifts us up where we belong, all you need is love!

TOULOUSE:
(Laughs happily)
Oh!  See, you can’t fool us!  You’re the voice of the Children of the Revolution!

BOHOS:
We can’t be fooled!

(They pull Christian out of the hole.)

TOULOUSE:
(Holds up his glass of absinthe)
Let’s drink to the new writer of the world’s first bohemian revolutionary show!

(The Argentinean plants a big old smooch on the lips of a very overwhelmed Christian.)

CHRISTIAN (V.O.):
(Typing.)
It was the perfect plan.  I was to audition for Satine.
(The Doctor is pouring absinthe for Christian and the bohos.)
And I would taste my first glass of…absinthe.

(Christian downs a shot.)

DAVID BOWIE (V.O.):
THERE WAS A BOY

(The Green Fairy on the bottle looks at them.)

GREEN FAIRY:
I am the Green Fairy.
(She flies out into the sky, fairy dust all around her, as Christian and the bohos watch in drunken enthrallment.)
THE HILLS ARE ALIVE

GREEN FAIRY, CHRISTIAN, and BOHOS:
WITH THE SOUND OF MUSIC

(Everyone laughs drunkenly as the Green Fairy starts dirty-dancing to Children of the Revolution music.)

DAVID BOWIE (V.O.):
A VERY STRANGE, ENCHANTED BOY

(The Bohos and Christian stand out on the balcony, Christian now dressed in the Argentinean’s suit and top hat, and sing as the Green Fairy makes the words “Freedom,” “Beauty,” and “Truth” with her fairy dust, outlining the “L’amour” sign instead of writing “Love.”)

CHRISTIAN and BOHOS:
YEAH, FREEDOM, BEAUTY, TRUTH AND LOVE

GREEN FAIRY:
THE HILLS ARE ALIVE
WITH THE SOUND OF MUSIC

(The Green Fairy multiplies.)

GREEN FAIRIES:
CHILDREN OF THE REVOLUTION
CHILDREN OF THE REVOLUTION

BOHOS:
YOU WON’T FOOL THE CHILDREN OF THE REVOLUTION
NO, YOU WON’T FOOL THE CHILDREN OF THE REVOLUTION

CHRISTIAN:
FREEDOM, BEAUTY, TRUTH, AND LOVE

CHRISTIAN (V.O.):
(As the songs come to an end.)
We were off to the Moulin Rouge.  And I was to perform my poetry for Satine.

(The Green Fairy’s eyes turn blood red and she lets out an Ozzy Osbourne scream as the Bohos and Christian fall off the roof and into a swirling vortex that takes them to the Moulin Rouge…)
(Where Zidler comes out from the entrance, and already we can see the knickers of can-can dancers...)

ZIDLER:
The Moulin Rouge!

(Christian is looking around the Moulin Rouge, even more overwhelmed than before, seeing all the same things that we saw during our brief introduction earlier.)

CHRISTIAN (V.O.):
Harold Zidler, and his infamous girls.  They called them his…
(Types.)
“Diamond Dogs.”

BECK (V.O.):
THE DIAMOND DOGS

DIAMOND DOGS:
VOULEZ-VOUS COUCHE AVEC MOI
CE SOIR
HEY SISTER GO SISTER
SOUL SISTER FLOW SISTER

NINI:
HEY!

(All the can-can dancers are coming out and strutting their stuff.  All the rich men in top hats seem to be having the time of their lives, and Christian looks…overwhelmed.)

ZIDLER:
(Leading off the Diamond Dogs)
If work’s an awful bore
And living’s just a chore

DIAMOND DOGS:
HEY SISTER GO SISTER
SOUL SISTER FLOW SISTER

ZIDLER:
What to do? ‘Cause death’s not much fun

DIAMOND DOGS:
HEY SISTER GO SISTER
SOUL SISTER FLOW SISTER

ZIDLER:
I’ve just the antidote
And though I mustn’t gloat

DIAMOND DOGS:
GITCHIE GITCHIE YA YA DA DA

ZIDLER:
At the Moulin Rouge
You’ll have fun!

DIAMOND DOGS:
GITCHIE GITCHIE YA YA HERE

(Toulouse is dancing with someone.)

ZIDLER:
So scratch that little niggle
Have a little wiggle!

DIAMOND DOGS:
GITCHIE GITCHIE YA YA DA DA

(The crowd is now dancing with the girls.)

ZIDLER:
[Something]

DIAMOND DOGS:
CREOLE LADY MARMALADE!

ZIDLER:
‘Cause you can can can!

CROWD:
Yes, you can can can!

DIAMOND DOGS:
VOULEZ-VOUS COUCHE AVEC MOI CE SOIR

ZIDLER:
Or you can’t can’t can’t!

CROWD:
Yes, you can can can!

DIAMOND DOGS:
VOULEZ-VOUS COUCHE AVEC MOI

(We come back through the Moulin Rouge doors, and Christian and the Bohos are dancing along with all the rich men in top hats.)

CROWD:
HERE WE ARE NOW, ENTERTAIN US
WE FEEL STUPID AND CONTAGIOUS

ZIDLER:
(Still being followed by the Diamond Dogs.)
Got some dark desire?
Love to play with fire?
Why not let it rip?
Live a little bit!

CROWD:
HERE WE ARE NOW, ENTERTAIN US

ZIDLER:
‘Cause you can can can!

(Now the rich men and the Diamond Dogs dance together.)

CROWD:
WE FEEL STUPID AND CONTAGIOUS

ZIDLER:
Or you can’t can’t can’t!

DIAMOND DOGS:
VOULEZ-VOUS COUCHE AVEC MOI CE SOIR

ZIDLER:
‘Cause you can can can!

DIAMOND DOGS:
VOULEZ-VOUS COUCHE AVEC MOI

ZIDLER:
(Outside in the rain with an umbrella)
Outside it may be raining
But in here it’s entertaining!

(After some shots of things like a girl with a large snake and old men in top hats and tutus, Zidler gives a Tarzan yodel and sort of flies back into the Moulin Rouge.)

‘Cause you can can can!
(Does back handsprings in front of the can-can dancers.)
‘Cause you can can can!

RICH MEN IN TOP HATS:
HERE WE ARE NOW, ENTERTAIN US

ZIDLER:
Outside, things may be tragic!
But in here, we think it’s magic!

(Nini seems to having a great time showing off her area.)

CROWD:
HERE WE ARE NOW, ENTERTAIN US
WE FEEL STU—

(From his perch above everything, Zidler cuts off all music and dancing.)

ZIDLER:
The can-can.
(Flips the Moulin Rouge dance sign over to “Can-Can”)

(The Diamond Dogs and dancers line themselves up for the dance.)

Because we can can can!

(Everyone starts can-canning like mad.)

DIAMOND DOGS:
HEY SISTER, GO SISTER
SOUL SISTER, FLOW SISTER
HEY SISTER, GO SISTER
SOUL SISTER, FLOW SISTER
GITCHIE GITCHE YA YA DA DA
GITCHIE GITCHE YA YA HERE

ZIDLER:
Because you can can can!
Yes you can can can!

DIAMOND DOGS:
GITCHIE GITCHE YA YA DA DA
CREOLE LADY MARMALADE

ZIDLER:
Because you can can can!
Because you can can can!

BOHOS:
(Dancing around Christian.)
YOU CAN BUMP AND GRIND

CHRISTIAN:
(Now thoroughly enjoying himself)
‘CAUSE IT’S GOOD FOR YOUR MIND

(The crazy singing and dancing continues in the background, and this transcriber does not have the patience to keep up with it all.)

TOULOUSE:
(From a little table with the other bohos)
Christian!
(Christian comes to sit with them.)
Mission accomplished.  We’ve successfully evaded Zidler.

ZIDLER:
‘Cause you can can can can can can can can can!

(The music stops and everything darkens.  Everyone looks up.)
(Some sparkles and smoke flow down from above, over all the rich men in top hats.)

TOULOUSE:
(To Christian)
It’s her.  The sparkling diamond.

(Satine is lowered into the room slightly, sitting on a trapeze/swing, and looking porcelain and ethereal in her sparkling diamond outfit.  Christian gazes up at her in love at first sight.)
 
 

SATINE:
THE FRENCH ARE GLAD TO DIE FOR LOVE
THEY DELIGHT IN FIGHTING DUELS

CHRISTIAN (V.O.):
But someone else was to meet Satine that night.

(THE DUKE watches Satine with an expression not too unlike Christian’s.  Just replace “love” with “lust.”)

SATINE:
BUT I PREFER A MAN WHO LIVES

CHRISTIAN (V.O.):
Zidler’s investor…

SATINE:
AND GIVES EXPENSIVE…
JEWELS

(Satine begins to lower into the audience, the crowd cheers and reaches their hands up for her.)

CHRISTIAN (V.O.):
(Typing.)
The Duke.

(Satine gets to the floor and struts and dances among the overjoyed crowd.  Christian seems unable to tear his gaze away.)

SATINE:
A KISS ON THE HAND MAY BE
QUITE CONTINENTAL
BUT DIAMONDS ARE A…

(The Duke is watching with somewhat more disgusting interest.)

SATINE and DIAMOND DOGS:
GIRL’S BEST FRIEND

DIAMOND DOGS:
OOOOH…

SATINE:
A KISS MAY BE GRAND BUT IT
WON’T PAY THE RENTAL
ON YOUR HUMBLE FLAT
OR HELP YOU FEED YOUR
MM, PUSSYCAT

SATINE and DIAMOND DOGS:
MEN GROW COLD AS
GIRLS GROW OLD

SATINE:
AND WE ALL LOSE OUR CHARMS IN THE END

SATINE and THE DIAMOND DOGS:
BUT SQUARE-CUT, OR PEAR-SHAPED
THESE ROCKS DON’T LOSE THEIR SHAPE
(Satine takes some offered diamonds from one of the rich guys.)
DIAMONDS ARE A GIRL’S BEST FRIEND

DUKE:
(At a table with Zidler, opposite the Boho table)
When am I going to meet the girl?

SATINE:
(Riding the audience.)
Tiffany’s!

ZIDLER:
After her number, I’ve arranged a special meeting, just you and Mademoiselle Satine.  Totally alone.

SATINE:
Cartier!
(Snatches some flowers from one of the men.)

TOULOUSE:
(To Christian.)
After her number, I’ve arranged a private meeting, just you and Mademoiselle Satine.  Totally alone!

CHRISTIAN:
Alone!?

TOULOUSE:
Yes.

ZIDLER and TOULOUSE:
(To The Duke and Christian, respectively)
Totally alone.

SATINE and THE DIAMOND DOGS:
‘CAUSE WE ARE LIVING IN A MATERIAL WORLD
AND I AM A MATERIAL GIRL

SATINE:
(Blows a kiss.)
Come and get me, boys!
(Does some more crowd-riding)
Whoo!

ZIDLER:
(Gets up from the Duke)
Excuse me.
(Jogs up on stage with Satine)

SATINE:
Black, star, Ross Cole!  Talk to me Harry Zidler, tell me all about it!
(Walks up there with Zidler)
THERE MAY COME A TIME WHEN A
LASS NEEDS A LAWYER

ZIDLER and THE DIAMOND DOGS:
BUT DIAMONDS ARE A GIRL’S BEST FRIEND
(Dangling diamonds in front of Satine)

SATINE:
(Grabs at them)
THERE MAY COME A TIME WHEN A
HARD-BOILED EMPLOYER THINKS YOU’RE

(Christian is freaking out.)

ZIDLER and THE DIAMOND DOGS:
AWFUL NICE
(Zidler pretends to grab at Satine’s backside.)

SATINE:
BUT GET THAT ICE
OR ELSE NO DICE

TOULOUSE:
(To Christian)
Don’t worry, don’t worry!  I’ll sally forth and tee things up!
(Turns and knocks a tray over onto the Duke)

DIAMOND DOGS:
YOU’LL GET BY WHEN STOCKS ARE HIGH
BUT BEWARE WHEN THEY START TO DESCEND

SATINE:
(To Zidler, as they both continue to dance around)
Is The Duke here, Harold?

ZIDLER:
Pigeon, would daddy let you down?

(They both turn and Zidler sees Toulouse having spilled stuff all over the Duke.)

TOULOUSE:
(Trying to take the Duke’s hanky to wipe him off.)
I’m terribly sorry!

SATINE:
(Dancing still)
Where is he?

ZIDLER:
(Dancing as well)
He’s the one Toulouse is shaking a hanky at.

TOULOUSE:
(Sees whose hanky he’s trying to grab, drops the hanky, and turns back to Christian)
Excuse me, Christian.  May I borrow?
(Pulls out Christian’s hanky)

DIAMOND DOGS:
DIAMONDS ARE A GIRL’S BEST
DIAMONDS ARE A GIRL’S BEST
DIAMONDS ARE A GIRL’S BEST FRIEND

SATINE:
(Squints and sees what appears to be Toulouse shaking a hanky at Christian)
Are you sure?

ZIDLER:
Let me peek.
(Peeks around her)

TOULOUSE:
(Has turned back to The Duke and tries to blot him off.)
I’m ever so sorry!  Oh, it’s embarrassing!

ZIDLER:
That’s the one, Chic Pea.
(Holds out the diamond thing for Satine who takes it excitedly, for the audience)
I hope that demonic little loon doesn’t frighten him off.

TOULOUSE:
(After the Duke refuses his help, throws the hanky at him.)
Clean yourself up, you bourgeois pig!  (Snorts like a pig)
(Turns when WARNER places a hand on his shoulder, and sees Warner’s gun.)
Sorry!  Sorry!
(Goes back over to the Boho table.)

(Satine and Zidler are dancing somewhat dirtily and then duck underneath a sort of curtain that the can-can dancers have made with their skirts.  Satine is changing her outfit and Zidler is taking his clothes off.)

SATINE:
Will he invest?

ZIDLER:
Pigeon!  After spending the night with you, how could he refuse!?

SATINE:
What’s his type?  Wilting flower? (Wilts)  Bright and bubbly? (Giggles)  Or smoldering temptress? (Growls)

ZIDLER:
I’d say smoldering temptress.  We’re all relying on you, Gosling.

NINI:
(Out there, dancing)
Ole!

ZIDLER:
Remember!  A real show, in a real theatre, with a real audience!  And you’ll be…

SATINE:
(Checks her makeup and then looks at Zidler longingly.)
…A real actress.
(Sighs and then smiles for the audience as the can-can dancers take their skirts down.  Zidler is in his long underwear, looking as though she undressed him in there.)
‘CAUSE THAT’S WHEN THOSE LOUSES
GO BACK TO THEIR SPOUSES

TOULOUSE:
(Calling to Satine.)
Pigeon!  Pigeon!!

SATINE:
DIAMONDS ARE A GIRL’S BEST
(Has made her way over to Christian who turns his head and gawks at her)
FRIEND…
I believe you were expecting me.

CHRISTIAN:
(Wide-eyed)
Yes…yes.

SATINE:
(Turns to the audience)
I’m afraid it’s lady’s choice!
(Points to Christian)

(Christian freaks out more and turns to his boho friends who try to encourage him.  Satine looks mock-offended and turns back to the crowd with an adorable pout.)

CROWD:
Awww…Sat-ine! Sat-ine! Sat-ine! Sat-ine!
(And so on)

(Satine dances about a bit, making sexy noises.)

TOULOUSE:
(Yelling to Satine.)
I see you’ve already met my English friend, Chris—

SATINE:
I’ll take care of it, Toulouse.
(Turns to Christian and takes his hand.)
Let’s dance.

TOULOUSE:
(While Satine is pulling up a highly awed Christian.)
Give her your most modern poems!

(Satine spins around and then pulls Christian out on the dance floor.)

DIAMOND DOGS:
TO THE BEAT OF THE RHYTHM OF THE NIGHT

PETIT PRINCESS:
DANCE UNTIL THE MORNING LIGHT

DIAMOND DOGS:
AND FORGET ABOUT THE WORRIES ON YOUR MIND

PETIT PRINCESS:
YOU CAN LEAVE THEM ALL BEHIND

(Satine dances about, and some rich men push Christian out there with her.)

DIAMOND DOGS:
TO THE BEAT OF THE RHYTHM OF THE NIGHT

PETIT PRINCESS:
DANCE UNTIL THE MORNING LIGHT

DIAMOND DOGS:
AND FORGET ABOUT THE WORRIES ON YOUR MIND

PETIT PRINCESS:
YOU CAN LEAVE THEM ALL BEHIND

(Christian is trying to dance with her but seems a little overwhelmed again as she’s all over him.)

SATIE:
(With the other Bohos, watching.)
That seemed to go well.

THE DOCTOR:
Incredible…

ARGENTINEAN:
He has a gift with the women.

TOULOUSE:
I told you, he’s a genius!

(The other rich men are dancing with can-can dancers who are doing the same stuff as Satine, but only Christian seems to feel awkward with it.)

ZIDLER:
(Watching Satine and Christian, must not have a very good view.)
That Duke certainly can dance!

SATINE:
(Dancing with a slightly more comfortable Christian.)
It’s so wonderful of you to take an interest in our little show.

CHRISTIAN:
Well, it sounds very exciting.  I’d be delighted to be involved.

SATINE:
Really!?

CHRISTIAN:
Assuming you like what I do, of course.

SATINE:
I’m sure I will!

(They all dance some more, and Christian tips his hat at the Bohos.  The Bohos tip back.)

CROWD:
HERE WE ARE NOW

CHRISTIAN:
Toulouse thought we might be able to, um... (Dips her) …do it in private.

SATINE:
Did he?

CROWD:
HERE WE ARE NOW

CHRISTIAN:
Yes, you know, a…a private… (dips her again) …poetry reading.

CROWD:
ENTERTAIN US

SATINE:
Ohhh…

CROWD:
HERE WE ARE NOW, ENTERTAIN US

SATINE:
A poetry reading…oh, I love a little poetry after supper.
(Grabs at him a little.)

CROWD:
HERE WE ARE NOW, ENTERTAIN US
HERE WE ARE NOW, ENTERTAIN US

SATINE:
(Kicks.) Take off your hats!

(The crowd tosses their top hats into the air, which can be seen from our momentary aerial view of Paris.  When we’re back inside, Satine is back on the trapeze/swing, being taken back up, and the crowd dances around her, hand in hand.)

DIAMONDS
DIAMONDS
SQUARE-CUT OR PEAR-SHAPED
THESE ROCKS WON’T LOSE THEIR SHAPE
DIAMONDS
ARE A GIRL’S
BEST…
(Gasps suddenly, as though she’s in pain or having trouble breathing.)

(Zidler notices something’s wrong, but the Crowd does not.  As they reach out for the song’s final word, Satine topples off of her swing and into the crowd below.)

ZIDLER:
No!!!

(Luckily, CHOCOLAT is there to catch her.  There is a horrified silence, as Chocolat looks to Zidler for instruction.  Zidler nods his head back toward Satine’s dressing room and Chocolat hurries her over there.  The crowd is silent and Christian looks extremely concerned.  Zidler suddenly shouts and claps, easily starting excited cheering and applause throughout the crowd.)

Sat-ine! Sat-ine!  Sat-ine!  Sat-ine!

(The Crowd joins in, while Chocolat and Petit Princess are taking the unconscious Satine back to her dressing room, passing the Diamond Dogs on their way.)

NINI:
(Grinning.)
Don’t know if that Duke’s gonna get his money’s worth tonight.

MOME FROMAGE:
Don’t be unkind, Nini!

(Chocolat lays Satine down gently and the Diamond Dogs gather around.)
(Out in the dance hall, Zidler cuts off the crowd’s chanting.)

ZIDLER:
You’ve frightened her away!

CROWD:
Awww…

ZIDLER:
But I can see some lonely Moulin Rouge dancers looking for a partner or two!

(Christian and the Bohos still seem worried.)

So if you can Hunk-Hunk, you can Hunkadola with them!
(Turns the “CAN-CAN” sign over to “HUNKADOLA”)

(The orchestra starts back up and people begin to dance again.)
(Back in the dressing room, MARIE enters.)

MARIE:
(Shooing Baby Doll out of the way.)
Out of the way, Baby Doll!
(Uses smelling salts to wake up Satine, who seems flushed and out of breath.)

SATINE:
(Looks up at the relieved Marie and Diamond Dogs.)
Oh, Marie… (Smiles tiredly.) All these…silly costumes…

MARIE:
Just a little fainting spell—

STAGE MANAGER:
(Pushing through the Diamond Dogs.)
All right, you girls!  Back outside and make those gents thirsty!
(Shoves the Diamond Dogs back out there, and approaches Marie and Satine.)
Problems?

MARIE:
Nothing for you to be worried about.

STAGE MANAGER:
Let’s not stand around, then.

(Marie glares at him as he walks away. Chocolat leaves, too, still worried.  Satine begins to gasp and cough violently into a hanky.  When she pulls it away from her mouth, it is stained with blood.  Marie is notably unnerved.)
(Chocolat and the dancers are all back out entertaining the crowd.)

CHOCOLAT and THE DIAMOND DOGS:
THEY CALL THEM THE DIAMOND DOGS

(A bit later, everyone is still having fun, but it’s cooled down.  The Duke is all uptight about something.  He walks up to Warner.)

DUKE:
Find Zidler!  The girl is waiting for me.

(In the dressing room, Marie is tying a corset on Satine, now wearing a sexy red dress and doing her makeup.)

MARIE:
That twinkle-toes Duke has really taken the bait, girl.
(Satine giggles a bit.)
With a patron like him, you could be the next Sarah Burnheart

SATINE:
Oh, Marie…Do you really think I could be like the great Sarah?

MARIE:
Why not?  You’ve got the talent.  You hook that Duke, and you’ll be lining up the great stages of Europe.

SATINE:
I’m going to be a real actress, Marie.  A great actress.  I’m going to fly away from here.
(Looks over at the bird in the gilded birdcage hanging next to her.)
Oh, yes, we’re going to fly, fly away from here.

ZIDLER:
(Rushing in.)
Dumpling, is everything all right!?

SATINE:
(Smiling at him through the mirror.)
Oh, yes!  Of course, Harold!

ZIDLER:
Oh, thank goodness!  You’ve certainly weaved your magic with that Duke on the dance floor.

SATINE:
(Turns to him and strikes a pose.)
How do I look?  Smoldering temptress?  (Growls.)

ZIDLER:
(Gasps and walks over to her)
Oh, my Little Strawberry!  How could he possibly resist but gobbling you up!?
(Satine giggles excitedly)
Everything’s going so well!

(Later, Christian stands in the window of The Elephant, playing nervously with his hat, while Satine is taking off her red dress behind something.)
(The Bohos can see him from outside, where there are people dancing and having fun all over the place.)

TOULOUSE:
Unbelievable!  Straight to the Elephant!

SATINE:
(Steps out into view, clad in black lingerie.)
This is a wonderful place for a poetry reading.  Don’t you think?  Hm?
(Acts sultry while Christian eyes her nervously.)
Poetic…enough…for you?

CHRISTIAN:
(Nods.)
Yes.

(The Bohos are climbing up the back of The Elephant to spy, giggling.)

SATINE:
(Heads over to the table and starts to pull out a champagne bottle.)
A little supper?  Maybe some champagne?

CHRISTIAN:
I’d rather just, um…get it over and done with.

SATINE:
(Drops the bottle back in the ice, slightly insulted.)
Oh…
(Turns and smirks at him sexily.)
Very well.
(Slinks over to the bed and drapes herself over it.)
Then why don’t you…come down here.
(Slips off part of the see-through robe she was wearing.)
And let’s get it over and done with…

CHRISTIAN:
(Fidgets.)
I…prefer to do it standing.

SATINE:
(Raises her eyebrows.)
Oh…
(Starts to stand.)

CHRISTIAN:
You don’t have to stand, I mean.
(Satine stops.)
It’s sometimes that…It’s quite long.
(She cocks an eyebrow.)
And I’d like you to be comfortable.  It’s quite modern, what I do, and it may feel a little strange at first, but I think, if you’re open, then (Smiles cutely), then you might enjoy it.

SATINE:
(Smiles too, a little surprised.)
I’m sure I will…

CHRISTIAN:
(Nods.)
Excuse me.
(Turns around, while Satine lays back and looks horny.)
The…
(Turns back.)
The sky…is…
(Can’t seem to speak straight because of Satine’s behavior.)
The sky…the blue...birds…
(Turns back around and blows air through his lips, like in a theatrical exercise)
Come on…come on…
(Psyches himself up and then turns around again.)
I think--…
(Satine is lying on her back, moaning loudly, so Christian turns around again.)
…Why am I so shaky?
(Does more little vocal exercises)

SATINE:
(Sits up, slightly annoyed)
Um…
(Christian turns to her.)
Is everything all right?

CHRISTIAN:
Uh…I-I…I’m a little nervous.  It’s just, sometimes, it takes a while for…um…

SATINE:
Ohhh…

CHRISTIAN:
You know, inspiration to come…

SATINE:
(Stands and walks over to him.)
Oh, yes, yes, yes… Let mummy help, hm?
(Grabs his crotch.)

CHRISTIAN:
(Gasp!)

SATINE:
Does that inspire you?
(Throws him onto the bed.)
Let’s make love.

CHRISTIAN:
(Confusion.)
Make love!?

SATINE:
(Jumps on him and straddles him.)
You want to, don’t you?

CHRISTIAN:
(Kinda scared)
Well, I…I came to—

SATINE:
(Covers his mouth and starts unbuttoning his shirt.)
No, tell the truth.  You feel the poetry!

CHRISTIAN:
What?

(The Bohos drop Toulouse down on a rope so he can see through the window.)

SATINE:
Oh, come on… whoo!  Feel it!  Tiger!!
(Lets out some catlike yelps while she works on undoing his pants.)

(Christian seems fearfully turned on.  They both look down at Christian’s presumably open fly.)

SATINE:
Big boy…

TOULOUSE:
(Looks up at the Bohos.)
He’s got a huge…talent!

SATINE:
(Lays on top of him hungrily.)
Oh, yes, I need your poetry now!

CHRISTIAN:
All right!!
(Escapes and runs to the other end of the room.)

(Satine falls over.)

It’s a little bit funny!

SATINE:
(Breathless)
What?

CHRISTIAN:
This...feeling inside
I’m not one of those…who can…who can easily hide.
(Looks at her.)
Is this…is this okay?  Is this what you want?

SATINE:
Ohhh, poetry…
(Christian nods.)
Yes…yes…yes, this is what I want, naughty words!

CHRISTIAN:
(Gives her an odd look.)
I-I don’t…

SATINE:
(Rolls on her back sensually and starts rubbing herself)
Oh, yes, naughty!

CHRISTIAN:
 I don’t have much money
But…but boy if I did
I’d buy a big house
Where we… (looking at her like she’s completely insane) where we both could live…
So…if I were a sculptor
(Satine has rolled onto the floor and crawls a bit closer to him, making horny sounds.)
But, then again, no
Or a man who makes potions
In a traveling show

SATINE:
(Ravishes a pillow.)
Oh, wonderful…
(Falls over again.)
Oh, don’t…don’t… don’t!
(Christian is just watching her oddly, so she looks up hurriedly.)
Oh, don’t stop!!

CHRISTIAN:
I…I know it’s not much…

SATINE:
Give me more!  Yes!  YES!!

CHRISTIAN:
(Stare…)
But it’s the best I can do…

SATINE:
Naughty!  Don’t stop!!  Yes!  Yes!  YE—

CHRISTIAN:
(Faces the window.)
MY GIFT IS MY SONG

(Satine stops and gazes at him, stunned.  The Bohos look up from their spot on the roof.  The city of Paris lights up.)
(Christian turns to look at her.)

AND THIS ONE’S FOR YOU
AND YOU CAN TELL EVERYBODY
THAT THIS IS YOUR SONG
IT MAY BE QUITE SIMPLE, BUT
NOW THAT IT’S DONE
HOPE YOU DON’T MIND
I HOPE YOU DON’T MIND
THAT  I PUT DOWN IN WORDS
HOW WONDERFUL LIFE IS
NOW YOU’RE IN THE WORLD
(Turns back to the window.  Now it’s Satine’s turn to be in love.)
I SAT ON THE ROOF
AND I KICKED OFF THE MOSS
(Satine stands and takes a hesitant step closer to him.)
WELL, SOME OF THESE VERSES, WELL THEY
THEY GOT ME QUITE CROSSED
(Turns to her as they approach each other.)
BUT THE SUN’S BEEN KIND
WHILE I WROTE THIS SONG
IT’S FOR PEOPLE LIKE YOU, THAT
KEEP IT TURNED ON
SO EXCUSE ME FORGETTING
BUT THESE THINGS I DO
YOU SEE, I’VE FORGOTTEN
IF THEY’RE GREEN OR THEY’RE BLUE
ANYWAY, THE THING IS
WHAT I REALLY MEAN
(Takes her hand.)
YOURS ARE THE SWEETEST EYES
I’VE EVER SEEN
(He twirls her, and then they leap outside to dance among the clouds and stars, while the moon sings in Italian.  It’s raining sparkles, so he pulls out an umbrella.)
AND YOU CAN TELL EVERYBODY
THIS IS YOUR SONG
IT MAY BE QUITE SIMPLE BUT
NOW THAT IT’S DONE
(The Bohos watch and cheer, as Satine twirls over to him.)
I HOPE YOU DON’T MIND
I HOPE YOU DON’T MIND
THAT I PUT DOWN IN WORDS
HOW WONDERFUL LIFE IS
NOW YOU’RE IN THE WORLD

(He twirls her and lifts her up, the Bohos shouting and laughing excitedly, and they’re back in the Elephant, arms around each other.)

SATINE:
Oh…I can’t believe it.  I’m in love.  I’m in love with a young, handsome, talented Duke.

CHRISTIAN:
(Smiling.)
Duke?

SATINE:
Mm, not that the title’s important, of course.

CHRISTIAN:
I’m not a Duke.

SATINE:
Not a Duke?

CHRISTIAN:
I’m a writer.

SATINE:
(Starts to kiss him and then stops.)
A writer?

CHRISTIAN:
(Nods and smiles.)
Yes, a writer.

SATINE:
(Backs up.)
No…

CHRISTIAN:
Toulouse—

SATINE:
Toulouse??  Oh no…  No, not another of Toulouse’s oh-so-talented, charmingly bohemian, tragically impoverished prodigies…

CHRISTIAN:
(Shrugs humbly, and smiles again)
Well, you might say that.

SATINE:
Oh no!!
(Christian stops smiling.)
I am going to kill him!

TOULOUSE:
(Looks up at the other bohos.)
I think there might be a small hitch…

(Satine runs to the door.  Christian follows her.)

CHRISTIAN:
Toulouse told me—

SATINE:
What about the Duke!?
(Opens the door.)

(Zidler and the Duke are standing out there.)

ZIDLER:
My dear Duke…

SATINE:
(Gasps and slams the door shut.)
The Duke!!

CHRISTIAN:
The Duke?

SATINE:
Hide!!

(Zidler and the Duke burst in, so Satine hides Christian behind her robe.)

ZIDLER:
My Dear!  Are you decent for the Duke?
(Satine whirls around, keeping Christian behind her.)
Where were you?

SATINE:
(Moving to the table, so Christian can hide behind it.)
I, uh…I…was…waiting!

ZIDLER:
My dearest Duke, allow me to introduce Mademoiselle Satine!

SATINE:
(Sultry.)
Mousier, how wonderful of you to take time out of your busy schedule to visit…
(Glances back and glares at Christian, who was peeking out.  Christian hides again.)

DUKE:
(Approaches)
The pleasure, I fear, will be entirely mine…my dear.

(Christian peeks out from the side.)

ZIDLER:
I’ll leave you two squirrels to get better acquainted, ta-ta!
(Leaves.)

DUKE:
(Kisses Satine’s hand.)
A kiss on the hand may be quite continental…

SATINE:
(Smiles)
But diamonds are a girl’s best friend…
(Slinks over to the bed and sits.)

DUKE:
After tonight’s petty exertions on the stage, you must surely be in need of refreshment, my dear.
(Starts to turn to the table.  Christian ducks.)

SATINE:
(Stands to stop him)
Don’t!! …you…just… love the view?  Hm?

DUKE:
…Charming.
(Reaches for the table again.)

SATINE:
Ohhh!  I feel like dancing!
(Starts to dance around and make odd noises.)

(Christian pokes out again and gawks at her.)

DUKE:
Uh…um…my dear, would you like a glass of champagne?
(Goes for it again, Christian ducks.)

SATINE:
No!!
(The Duke turns and stares at her.)
It’s…it’s a little bit funny.

DUKE:
What is?

(Christian pokes out.)

SATINE:
This…
(Christian mouths “feeling.”)
Feeling
(Christian points and mouths “inside.”)
Inside
(Christian mouths the next part)
I’m not one of those who can easily…
(Christian pretends to hide behind his hands.)
Hide!

(Christian knocks a candle over and ducks quickly.  Satine latches onto the Duke’s legs before he can turn and see.)

I don’t have much money!
But if I did…
Oh, I’d buy a big house
Where we both could live
(Peeks through the Duke’s legs to point Christian out the door on the other side.)
I HOPE YOU DON’T MIND
(Stands up slowly, as Christian sneaks to the door, watching them.)
I HOPE YOU DON’T MIND
THAT I PUT DOWN IN WORDS
(Glancing at Christian as though she’s singing to him.)
HOW WONDERFUL LIFE IS
NOW YOU’RE IN THE WORLD

(The Duke’s eyes sparkle.)

DUKE:
That’s very beautiful…

SATINE:
(Gesturing behind the Duke for Christian to go out the door.)
It’s from Spectacular Spectacular.  Suddenly, with you here, I finally understood the true meaning of those words.
(Christian is opening the door and backing out.)
How wonderful life is…now you’re in the world.

DUKE:
What meaning is that, my dear?

(Christian sees Warner standing out there and quickly slams the door shut.  It’s loud, so Satine throws herself on the bed and pretends to sob.)
(Christian tries to hide in ridiculous places.)

SATINE:
Duke!  Don’t you toy with my emotions!  You…you must know the affect you have on women…
(Grabs the Duke and pulls him down on top of her.  Boing!)
Let’s make love!  You want to make love, don’t you!?
(Barely kisses him and waves Christian to the other side of the room.)

(Christian runs there, but stops before he can hide…)

Ooh, I knew you felt the same way! Oh!  Oh, Duke!

(Christian turns to her and she waves him out frantically.  He won’t budge.)

Yes…you’re right, we should wait…until opening night.
(Pushes him off.)

(Christian gives a satisfied nod and then hides.)

DUKE:
Wait?  What?

SATINE:
(Standing up with him.)
There’s a power in you that scares me.  You should go!
(Leads him to the door.)

DUKE:
I just got here.

SATINE:
Oh, yes, but…we’ll see each other every day during rehearsal.  We must wait!  We must wait until opening night.  Get out.
(Opens the door and pushes him out.)
(Turns back to the approaching Christian and stalks over to him.)
Do you have any idea…any idea what would have happened if you were found!?
(Suddenly seems breathless and pale)
(Passes out onto Christian.)

CHRISTIAN:
(Catches her)
Oh…oh my g--…Satine…
(Tries to shake her awake)

ZIDLER:
(Watching from a window across from the Elephant, through a telescope.)
Let’s have a little peek-a-boo…
(Sees Christian shaking Satine, only it looks like Satine having sex with someone, standing up.)
Right on target!

(Christian hoists her up and looks around awkwardly.)

CHRISTIAN:
(Dragging her over to the bed)
I’ll put you in bed…

(Christian manages to get her over to the bed, while the Bohos peer from behind a wall.  It seems they’ve made it inside.  Christian has to sort of climb on top of her in order to place her in a comfortable position.)
(The Duke walks in.)

DUKE:
I forgot my ha—
(Christian looks like a deer in headlights.)
Foul play?

CHRISTIAN:
She…I…

SATINE:
(Wakes up)
Oh, Duke…

DUKE:
It’s a little bit funny, this feeling inside.

CHRISTIAN:
(Shakes his head.)
No…

SATINE:
Beautifully spoken, Duke.  Yes, let me introduce you.  The writer.

DUKE:
The writer.

SATINE:
Yes…
(Stands, kinda knocking Christian to the side.)
Oh yes, we were…we were rehearsing.

DUKE:
Hahaha… You expect me to believe that, scantily clad, in the arms of another man, in the middle of the night, inside an Elephant, you were rehearsing!?

TOULOUSE:
(Pops out from behind a wall)
How’s the rehearsal going!?
(He is quickly followed by the other Bohos.)
Shall we take it from the top, then, eh Satine?

SATIE:
(Heading to the piano)
I hope the piano’s in tune.

ARGENTINEAN:
Sorry that we are late.

THE DOCTOR:
Can I offer you a drink?
(Holds a bottle out to him)

ZIDLER:
(Now sees everyone through his telescope)
Oh my goodness!
(Runs off)

SATINE:
When I spoke those words to you before, you…you filled me with such inspiration.  Yes, I realized how much work we had to do before tomorrow.  So I called everyone together for an emergency rehearsal!

DUKE:
If you’re rehearsing, where’s Zidler?

SATINE:
No, I wouldn’t bother Har—

ZIDLER:
(Bursts through the door)
My dear Duke, I’m most terribly sorry!

SATINE:
Harold!  You made it!  It’s all right, the Duke knows all about the (gives him a look) emergency rehearsal.

ZIDLER:
(Nods)
Emergency rehearsal?

SATINE:
Mm, to incorporate the Duke’s artistic idea.

ZIDLER:
Yes, well, I’m sure Audrey will be only too delighted—

TOULOUSE:
Audrey’s left!

ZIDLER:
He’s what?

SATINE:
Harold, the cat’s out of the bag.  Yes, the Duke’s already a big fan of our new writer’s work.  That’s why he’s so keen to invest. (Another look)

ZIDLER:
Invest?  (Looks to the Duke) Invest!  Oh, yes, well, invest!  You can hardly blame me for trying to hide our…

CHRISTIAN:
Christian.

TOULOUSE:
Christian!

ZIDLER:
…Christian away!

DUKE:
I’m way ahead of you, Zidler.

ZIDLER:
My dear Duke…why don’t you and I go to my office to produce the paperwork?

DUKE:
What’s the story?

ZIDLER:
The story?

DUKE:
Well, if I’m to invest, I’ll need to know the story.

ZIDLER:
Oh, yes…well…the story’s about…  Toulouse?

(All eyes go to Toulouse.)

TOULOUSE:
Well…well…the story’s…the story’s about…Well, it’s, it’s about, um…

CHRISTIAN:
It’s about love!

(All eyes go to Christian.)

DUKE:
(Unimpressed.)
Love?

CHRISTIAN:
(Sharing a look with Satine.)
It’s about love…overcoming all obstacles.

TOULOUSE:
And it’s set in Switzerland!
(Christian gives him a funny look.)

DUKE:
(Looks back at Zidler, unhappy)
Switzerland?

ZIDLER:
It’s not in Switzerland!

CHRISTIAN:
(Sees an Indian elephant statue.)
India…India!  It’s set in India!!
(Looks at Satine.)
And there’s a Courtesan…the most beautiful courtesan in all the world.
(Glares at the Duke)
But her kingdom’s invaded by an Evil Maharajah!  Now, in order to save her kingdom (looks disgusted) She has to seduce the Evil Maharajah.  But, on the night of the seduction, she mistakes a Penniless P--…Penn…Penniless…
(Sees a sitar and picks it up.)
Penniless Sitar Player for the Evil Maharajah, and she falls in love with him!  (As if to clarify to Satine.) He wasn’t trying to trick her or anything…but he was dressed as a maharajah…because…he’s appearing in a play.

ARGENTINEAN:
(Takes the sitar from Christian.)
I will play the Penniless tango-dancing Sitar Player.  I sing like an angel… but dance like the devil!

DUKE:
(Nods)
Yes…yes, all right.  And-and what happens next?

CHRISTIAN:
Well, the Penniless Sitar Player and the Courtesan, they have to hide their love from the Evil Maharajah.

SATIE:
The Penniless Sitar Player’s sitar is magical!  It can only speak the truth!

TOULOUSE:
And I will play the Magical Sitar!
(Puts himself behind the sitar so it looks like his head on the end of the instrument.)
(Makes a sitar noise and turns to Satine) You are beautiful!  (Makes it again and turns to Zidler) You are ugly.  (Turns to the Duke) And you are—
(Everyone covers his mouth.)

DUKE:
Yes, and he gives the game away!

(Everyone exclaims in agreement.)

THE DOCTOR:
Tell him about the can-can!

CHRISTIAN:
It’s a…tantric can-can, it’s—

ZIDLER:
(Shoves Christian away)
It’s a neurotic, spectacular scene that captures the thrusting, violent, vibrant, world bohemian spirit that this whole production embodies, Duke!

DUKE:
What do you mean by that?

ZIDLER:
I mean the show will be…a magnificent, opulent, tremendous, stupendous, gargantuan bedazzlement!  A sensual ravishment!  It will be…

(Everyone prepares for the upcoming musical number.)

Spectacular Spectacular
No words in the vernacular
Can describe this great event
You’ll be dumb with wonderment
Returns are fixed at ten percent
You must agree that’s excellent
AND ON TOP OF YOUR FEE

ALL (Except the Duke):
YOU’LL BE INVOLVED ARTISTICALLY
SO EXCITING, THE AUDIENCE WILL STOMP AND CHEER
SO DELIGHTING, IT WILL RUN FOR FIFTY YEARS
SO EXCITING, THE AUDIENCE WILL STOMP AND CHEER
SO DELIGHTING, IT WILL RUN FOR FIFTY YEARS

TOULOUSE:
ELEPHANTS

THE DOCTOR:
BOHEMIANS

ZIDLER:
INDIANS

SATINE:
AND COURTESANS

SATIE:
ACROBATS

ARGENTINEAN:
AND JUGGLING BEARS

TOULOUSE:
EXOTIC GIRLS

ALL (Except the Duke):
FIRE EATERS
MUSCLE MEN, CONTORTIONISTS
INTRIGUE, DANGER

TOULOUSE:
AND ROMANCE

ALL (Except the Duke):
ELECTRIC LIGHTS, MACHINERY

ZIDLER:
RUN WITH ELECTRICITY

ALL (Except the Duke):
SO EXCITING, THE AUDIENCE WILL STOMP AND CHEER
SO DELIGHTING, IT WILL RUN FOR FIFTY YEARS
SO EXCITING, THE AUDIENCE WILL STOMP AND CHEER
SO DELIGHTING, IT WILL RUN FOR FIFTY YEARS

SPECTACULAR SPECTACULAR
NO WORDS IN THE VERNACULAR
CAN DESCRIBE THIS GREAT EVENT
YOU’LL BE DUMB WITH WONDERMENT

THE HILLS ARE ALIVE
WITH THE SOUND OF MUSIC

SO EXCITING, THE AUDIENCE WILL STOMP AND CHEER
SO DELIGHTING, IT WILL RUN FOR FIFTY YEARS
SO EXCITING, THE AUDIENCE WILL STOMP AND CHEER
SO DELIGHTING, IT WILL RUN FOR FIFTY YEARS
(Pose)

DUKE:
Yes, but what happens in the end?

(They all look at each other and then rush to prepare for acting out the rest of the song.)

CHRISTIAN:
(Steps out in front of the makeshift curtain and clears his throat, cuing the lights and the opening of the curtain.)
THE COURTESAN AND SITAR MAN
ARE PULLED APART BY AN EVIL PLAN

SATINE:
BUT IN THE END, SHE HEARS HIS SONG

CHRISTIAN:
(Exchanging a look with Satine)
AND THEIR LOVE IS JUST TOO STRONG

DUKE:
IT’S A LITTLE BIT FUNNY
THIS FEELING INSIDE

ALL (Except the Duke):
(Pause.)
SO EXCITING, THE AUDIENCE WILL STOMP AND CHEER
SO DELIGHTING, IT WILL RUN FOR FIFTY YEARS

CHRISTIAN:
THE SITAR PLAYER’S SECRET SONG
HELPS THEM FLEE THE EVIL ONE
THOUGH THE TYRANT RANTS AND RAILS
IT IS ALL TO NO AVAIL

ZIDLER:
I am the Evil Maharajah!  You will not escape!

SATINE:
Oh, Harold, no one could play him like you could!

(The Duke seems very amused.)

ZIDLER:
No one’s going to.

ALL (Except the Duke):
SO EXCITING, WE’LL MAKE THEM LAUGH, WE’LL MAKE THEM CRY
SO DELIGHTING…

DUKE:
And in the end, should someone die?

ALL (Except the Duke):
(Pause, glance at each other.)
SO EXCITING, THE AUDIENCE WILL STOMP AND CHEER
SO DELIGHTING, IT WILL RUN FOR FIFTY YEARS
(Pose, Warner walks in, and Toulouse jumps on him, using him to pose.)

DUKE:
Generally, I like it.

(Everyone cheers and hugs the Duke.)

CHRISTIAN (V.O.):
Zidler had an investor, and the Bohemians had a show.

(Later that night, everyone is partying around the Moulin Rouge and above Christian’s garret to The Children of the Revolution.)

TOULOUSE:
(Sitting drunk on a roof, with no pants.)
It’s the end of the century!  The bohemian revolution is here!
(Throws his drink)

(The bohos, the Diamond Dogs, and lots of other random people seem to be dancing and having sex.)

CHRISTIAN (V.O.):
While the celebration party raged upstairs, I tried to write.  But all I could think about was her.

CHRISTIAN:
(Sitting in the window of his garret.)
HOW WONDERFUL LIFE IS

CHRISTIAN (V.O.):
Was she thinking about me?

CHRISTIAN:
(Gazing across at the Elephant)
NOW YOU’RE IN THE WORLD

(Satine is sitting alone in the dark Elephant, by the mirror.)

CHRISTIAN’S VOICE:
(In Satine’s head, as she stands and gazes out toward Christian’s garret)
Duke?  I’m not a Duke… I’m a writer… He wasn’t trying to trick her or anything… It’s about love… It’s about love overcoming all obstacles…

(Satine and Christian can barely see each other across the Moulin Rouge, through their respective windows.)
(Satine slowly walks closer, and Christian moves back to his typewriter.)

SATINE:
I FOLLOW THE NIGHT

(The party still rages above the garret, and Christian is trying to write.)

CAN’T STAND THE LIGHT
WHEN WILL I BEGIN TO LIVE AGAIN?

(Christian is looking out his window again, and he can see Satine leaning in her own.)

ONE DAY I’LL FLY AWAY
LEAVE ALL THIS TO YESTERDAY
WHAT MORE COULD YOUR LOVE DO FOR ME?
WHEN WILL LOVE BE THROUGH WITH ME?

(Christian walks to his window.)

WHY LIVE LIFE FROM DREAM TO DREAM
AND DREAD THE DAY WHEN DREAMING ENDS?

CHRISTIAN:
HOW WONDERFUL LIFE IS
NOW YOU’RE IN THE WORLD

(Satine is heading up the steps to the top of the Elephant, and Christian quickly leaves his garret.  When Satine looks, she can see that he’s not there anymore.)

SATINE:
(Singing to the sky, on top of the Elephant.)
ONE DAY I’LL FLY AWAY
LEAVE ALL THIS TO YESTERDAY
WHY LIVE LIFE FROM DREAM TO DREAM

(Christian heads toward the Elephant.)

AND DREAD THE DAY WHEN DREAMING ENDS?

(Christian is climbing up the back of the Elephant, the same way the bohos did earlier.  Satine sits down.)

ONE DAY I’LL FLY AWAY
FLY, FLY AWAY

(Christian stands behind her.)

CHRISTIAN:
Sorry!
(Satine cries out in surprise, stands, and whirls around to him.)
Sorry, I didn’t mean…I saw your light on, and I…I climbed up the…

SATINE:
What?

CHRISTIAN:
I couldn’t sleep, and I want-I wanted to thank you for…helping me get the job.

SATINE:
Oh!  Of course…  Yes, Toulouse…Toulouse was right.  You’re…you’re very talented.
(Christian looks modest.)
It’s going to be a wonderful show.  (Nods.)  Anyway, I’d better go, because we…uh, we both have a big day tomorrow.
(Turns.)

CHRISTIAN:
Wait!  No, please, wait…
(Satine stops and turns to him expectantly.)
Before, when we were…when we were…when you thought I was the Duke… you said that you loved me.  An-and I wondered if…if—

SATINE:
If it was just…an act?

CHRISTIAN:
Yes!

SATINE:
Of course.

CHRISTIAN:
Oh…it just felt…real.

SATINE:
(Approaches him.)
Christian…I’m a courtesan.  I’m paid to make men believe what they want to believe.

CHRISTIAN:
Yes…
(Pause.  He smiles sadly.)
Silly of me to think that you could…fall in love with someone like me.

SATINE:
I can’t fall in love with anyone.

CHRISTIAN:
Can’t fall in love?  But…a life without love, that’s terrible!

SATINE:
No!  Living on the streets, that’s terrible!

CHRISTIAN:
No!
(Satine can’t seem to believe he’s saying this)
Love is like oxygen!

SATINE:
What?

CHRISTIAN:
Love is a many-splendored thing, love lifts us up where we belong, all you need is love!

SATINE:
Please, don’t start that again.

CHRISTIAN:
ALL YOU NEED IS LOVE

SATINE:
A girl has got to eat.

CHRISTIAN:
ALL YOU NEED IS LOVE

SATINE:
She’ll end up on the streets!

CHRISTIAN:
ALL YOU NEED IS LOVE

SATINE:
LOVE IS JUST A GAME

CHRISTIAN:
I WAS MADE FOR LOVIN’ YOU, BABY
YOU WERE MADE FOR LOVIN’ ME

SATINE:
THE ONLY WAY OF LOVIN’ ME, BABY
IS TO PAY A LOVELY FEE

CHRISTIAN:
JUST ONE NIGHT
GIVE ME JUST ONE NIGHT

SATINE:
THERE’S NO WAY
‘CAUSE YOU CAN’T PAY

CHRISTIAN:
IN THE NAME OF LOVE
ONE NIGHT IN THE NAME OF LOVE

SATINE:
YOU CRAZY FOOL
I WON’T GIVE INTO YOU
(Turns.)

CHRISTIAN:
Don’t…LEAVE ME THIS WAY
I CAN’T SURVIVE WITHOUT YOUR SWEET LOVE
OH BABY, DON’T LEAVE ME THIS WAY

SATINE:
YOU’D THINK THAT PEOPLE
WOULD HAVE HAD ENOUGH
OF SILLY LOVE SONGS

CHRISTIAN:
I LOOK AROUND ME AND I SEE
IT ISN’T SO
Oh, no.
(Touches her face softly)

SATINE:
SOME PEOPLE WANT TO FILL THE WORLD
WITH SILLY LOVE SONGS

CHRISTIAN:
(Leaning in for a kiss)
WELL WHAT’S WRONG WITH THAT?
I’D LIKE TO KNOW
(Satine walks away quickly)
‘CAUSE HERE I GO
(Runs and stands up on the Elephant’s skylight, nearly losing his balance)
YEAH

SATINE:
Ah, no!

CHRISTIAN:
LOVE LIFTS US UP WHERE WE BELONG

SATINE:
Get down, get down!

CHRISTIAN:
WHERE EAGLES FLY ON A MOUNTAIN HIGH

SATINE:
(Takes his hand and pulls him down.)
LOVE MAKES US ACT LIKE WE ARE FOOLS
THROW OUR LIVES AWAY FOR ONE HAPPY DAY
(Heads back down the stairs)

CHRISTIAN:
WE COULD BE HEROES
JUST FOR ONE DAY
(Follows her)

SATINE:
YOU…YOU WILL BE MEAN

CHRISTIAN:
No, I won’t!

SATINE:
AND I…I’LL DRINK ALL THE TIME
(Heads back into the Elephant)

CHRISTIAN:
(Follows)
WE SHOULD BE LOVERS

SATINE:
WE CAN’T DO THAT

CHRISTIAN:
WE SHOULD BE LOVERS
AND THAT’S A FACT

SATINE:
THOUGH NOTHING WILL KEEP US TOGETHER…

CHRISTIAN:
WE COULD STEAL TIME…

SATINE and CHRISTIAN:
(As they approach each other)
JUST FOR ONE DAY
WE COULD BE HEROES FOREVER AND EVER
WE COULD BE HEROES FOREVER AND EVER
WE COULD BE HEROES

CHRISTIAN:
(As everything lights up around them)
JUST BECAUSE I WILL ALWAYS LOVE YOU

SATINE:
I…

SATINE and CHRISTIAN:
CAN’T HELP LOVING…

CHRISTIAN:
YOU

SATINE:
HOW WONDERFUL LIFE IS…

SATINE and CHRISTIAN:
NOW YOU’RE IN THE WORLD

SATINE:
You’re going to be bad for business.  I can tell.

(And they kiss.)

THE MOON:
(Sings in Italian.)

(Toulouse stands in the window above Christian’s garret, drunk and crying.)

TOULOUSE:
HOW WONDERFUL LIFE IS
NOW YOU’RE IN THE WORLD

DAVID BOWIE (V.O.):
THERE WAS A BOY…

CHRISTIAN (V.O.):
(With typing.)
How wonderful life was, now Satine was in the world.  But, in the Duke, Zidler had gotten much more than he had bargained for.

(Future Christian looks out the window at the run-down Moulin Rouge.)
(The Duke sits across from Zidler, in Zidler’s office.)

DUKE:
Conversion of the Moulin Rouge into a theatre will cost a fantastic sum of money, Zidler.  So, in return, I would require a contract that, um…binds Satine to me, exclusively.
(Zidler raises his eyebrows)
Naturally, I shall require some security.  I shall require the deeds to the Moulin Rouge.

(A flash of the Moulin Rouge deeds, made out to “Duc de Monroth”)

ZIDLER:
My dear Duke…I—

DUKE:
Please!  Don’t think that I’m naïve, Zidler.  I shall hold the deeds to the Moulin Rouge!  And if there are any shenanigans…

ZIDLER:
I—

DUKE:
My man-servant, Warner…
(Warner steps out)
…will deal with it in the only language that you underworld show-folk understand.  Satine will be mine.  It’s not that I’m a jealous man.  I just don’t like other people touching my things!!!
(Calms down a bit.)

ZIDLER:
I…understand completely…Duke.

(Zidler signs the deeds over.)

DUKE:
(Smiles.)
Good.  Now that we have an understanding, it would appear that, uh…you have the means to transform your beloved Moulin Rouge…

ZIDLER:
(In a different scene, showing a model of the theatre to the inhabitants of the Moulin Rouge.)
…Into a theatre!
(The crowd applauds)

DUKE:
I shall woo Satine over supper, tonight.

(Christian pulls a page out of his typewriter in the future, and we’re back in the Moulin Rouge, in the process of being made into a theatre, where Zidler is speaking to the Moulin Rouge crowd.)
(Christian and Satine share a look from across the room, and then Satine smiles brightly at the Duke.)

ZIDLER:
We will have created the world’s first completely modern, entirely electric, totally bohemian, all singing, all dancing, stage spectacular!

(Everyone applauds and then a wrecking ball smashes through the wall, nearly hitting Zidler.  Everyone screams and stands.  Zidler gets up, covered in debris.)

The show must go on!

CHRISTIAN (V.O.):
(Typing.)
Yes, the show would go on.  But Satine would not attend the supper that night, or the following night.

(Satine, Christian, and Toulouse are all in Christian’s garret.  Satine is sitting in her robe, Toulouse is preparing food, and Christian is explaining the stuff he’s written.)

TOULOUSE:
Fantastic!

CHRISTIAN:
(After yelling something.)
Mad with jealousy, the Evil Maharajah forces the Courtesan to make the Penniless Sitar Player believe she doesn’t love him!

TOULOUSE:
(Delighted)
That’s…oh, yes!

CHRISTIAN:
(Giving the Sitar Player a French accent)
“Thank you for curing me of my ridiculous obsession with love!” says the Penniless Sitar Player, throwing money at her feet, and leaving the kingdom forever!
(Starts to jump off the balcony.)

SATINE and TOULOUSE:
No!
(Laugh when he comes down.)

SATINE:
Oh, but a life without love!  That’s terrible!

CHRISTIAN:
(Sits by Satine and nuzzles her, both of them giggling.)
Yes…but, the Sitar Player’s…

TOULOUSE:
Wait!

CHRISTIAN:
Magical Sitar…

TOULOUSE:
That’s my part, Christian!  That’s my part!  That’s my part Christian!
(Goes over there, laughing.)
Don’t you dare!  The Magical Sitar who can only speak the truth says…he says…

CHRISTIAN (V.O.):
(Typing)
The greatest thing you’ll ever learn, is just to love and be loved in return.

(Chocolat, Petit Princess, and others are rehearsing in the Moulin Rouge, Nini singing Chamma Chamma.)
(Christian and Satine are being rather intimate in her dressing room, when the Duke bursts in with a picnic basket, and they quickly pretend to be looking at scripts.)

DUKE:
A picnic, sweet lady?

SATINE:
Oh, we have so much to do…so much work!

DUKE:
(Handing Christian the basket.)
Well, if the young writer can carry a blanket and basket, I don’t see why you both can’t do it in my presence.

(Toulouse, Satine, and Christian are all rehearsing in another scene.)

CHRISTIAN:
…Toulouse.  So, the Magical Sitar Player falls from the roof—

TOULOUSE:
Yes, yes, I know, I know, don’t tell me…

(With a flash of the orchestra rehearsing.)

The greatest thing you’ll ever…
(Christian nods.)

(In a similar scene as before, Christian and Satine are totally making out in her dressing room, when the Duke pops in, and they quickly pretend to be looking at scripts, both with lipstick on their faces.)

DUKE:
Still at it, my sweet?

TOULOUSE:
(In the other scene, trying to get his line out)
Master…

(The dancers and acrobats rehearse.)

Make…

(The orchestra rehearses with Satie.)

Contract…

SATINE:
(Back in the scene with the lipstick all over her face.)
Oh, my dear Duke, so many lines to learn.  Been drilling them over and over.
(The Duke smiles at her and Christian, who’s sort of trying to hide his face with the script.)

CHRISTIAN (V.O.):
For, try as the Duke may, it was almost too easy for the young writer and the lead actress to invent perfectly legitimate reasons to avoid him.

(The Duke and Satine are sitting next to each other, watching the chorus rehearse, when Satine looks back and gives the approaching Christian a little smile, then turns and pretends she didn’t see him.)

CHRISTIAN:
Mademoiselle Satine…I haven’t quite finished writing that new scene.  The, um… “Will the lovers be meeting at the Sitar Player’s humble abode?” scene, and I wondered if I could work on it with you later tonight.

DUKE:
But, my dear, I’ve arranged a magnificent supper for us in the Gothic Tower!

CHRISTIAN:
Well…it’s not important…we could work on it tomorrow.

SATINE:
(Stands.)
Well, how dare you!  It cannot wait until tomorrow!  “The lovers WILL be meeting in the Sitar Player’s humble abode” scene is the most important in the production!  We will work on it tonight until I am completely satisfied.

DUKE:
(Stands, too.)
But…but, my dear—

SATINE:
Dear Duke!  Excuse me.
(Walks off.)

(The Duke looks back at Christian.)

CHRISTIAN:
I’m sorry.
(Is quite obviously not.  Walks off, as well.)

(Christian and Satine meet back, above the stage, while Zidler is wrapping the rehearsal up.)

ZIDLER:
Nice work, family!  Bright and early tomorrow morning we begin on Act II: The Lovers Are Discovered!

(Satine and Christian are making out passionately behind a curtain.  The Duke heads over to Zidler.)

DUKE:
Zidler!

ZIDLER:
(Looks up and heads over to him.)
My dear Duke!  Everything is arranged for that special supper in the Gothic Tower tonight.

DUKE:
You might as well eat it yourself, Zidler.  Her affections are waning.

ZIDLER:
Impossible!

DUKE:
I understand how important her work is to her, but she’s always at it with that damn writer!  If I don’t see her tonight, I’m very well leaving!

(Zidler looks up and sees Satine and Christian making out.  The Duke starts to look that way, too.)

ZIDLER:
No!!  My dear Duke…I’ll insist Satine takes the night off.

DUKE:
All right…all right.  (Nods.) 8 o’clock, then.
(Leaves, as Zidler looks back up toward Satine and Christian, horrified.)

(Christian and Satine have stopped making out.)

CHRISTIAN:
You’ll come…tonight?

SATINE:
Yes…

(Satine giggles as they kiss once more and Christian pulls her away with him.  Zidler glares up at them.)

CHRISTIAN:
(Starts to leave in a hurry, but turns again, lipstick ALL over his face.)
What time?

SATINE:
(Giggling at how funny he looks.)
8 o’clock!

CHRISTIAN:
Promise?

SATINE:
Yes!
(Christian flashes her the most adorable smile and leaves as she waves him off.)
Go!
(Turns and sees Zidler standing there.)

ZIDLER:
Are you mad?  The Duke holds the deeds to the Moulin Rouge!  He’s spending a fortune on you.  He’s given you a beautiful new dressing room, he wants to make you a star.  And you’re dallying with the writer!

SATINE:
(Laughs.)
Oh, Harold, don’t be ridicul—

ZIDLER:
I saw you together!!!

SATINE:
…It’s nothing.
(Turns.)
It’s just an infatuation, it’s…it’s nothing.

ZIDLER:
The infatuation will end.  Go to the boy.  Tell him it’s over.  The Duke is expecting you in the Tower at Eight.
(Turns and leaves.)

SATINE:
(Heads toward her dressing room)
IF I SHOULD DIE THIS VERY MOMENT
I WOULDN’T FEAR
FOR I’VE NEVER KNOWN COMPLETENESS
LIKE BEING HERE

(Future Christian is running his hands through his hair in grief.)

WRAPPED IN THE WARMTH OF YOU
LOVING EVERY BREATH OF YOU
WHY LIVE LIFE FROM DREAM TO DREAM
AND DREAD THE DAY…

(Back in the dressing room, Satine begins to gasp for air and cough violently.)

CHRISTIAN (V.O.):
(Typing.)
How could I know, in those last fatal days, that a force darker than jealousy and stronger than love had begun to take hold of Satine?

(Petit Princess and Chocolat watch in fear as Satine eventually passes out.)
(Meanwhile, the Duke and Zidler are waiting for Satine in the Gothic Tower.)

ZIDLER:
(Watching through his telescope, while the Duke paces.)
Where is she?

(Christian is waiting expectantly for her in his garret, but Marie has called the doctor, and Satine is out cold.  The doctor is taking a blood sample, while Chocolat and Petit Princess pace.)

MARIE:
Do you think she’ll be up and about by tonight?

DOCTOR:
Tomorrow morning at the earliest.

(Christian dejectedly walks back into his garret from the balcony.)
(The server boys close the balcony doors of the Gothic Tower.)

STAGE MANAGER:
(To Zidler.)
The Duke’s leaving!

ZIDLER:
(Shouts to the Duke.)
She’s confessing!!!!!

DUKE:
Confessing?  What kind of imbecile do you take me for, Zidler?

ZIDLER:
She suddenly had a terrible desire to go to a priest and confess her sins.

DUKE:
What?

ZIDLER:
She wanted to be cleansed of her former life.  She looks upon tonight as her wedding night!

DUKE:
Her wedding night?

ZIDLER:
She’s like a blushing bride.  She says you make her feel like a…virgin.

DUKE:
A virgin?

ZIDLER:
You know…touched for the very first time?

DUKE:
For the first…

ZIDLER:
She says it feels so good inside, when you hold her, and you touch her…

DUKE:
(Starting to smile a bit.)
Like a virgin.

(The server boys are preparing for the musical number.)

ZIDLER:
She’s made it through the wilderness somehow.  She’s made it through.  She didn’t know how lost she was…
UNTIL SHE FOUND YOU
SHE WAS BEAT, INCOMPLETE
SHE’D BEEN HAD
SHE WAS SAD AND BLUE
BUT YOU MADE HER FEEL
YES, YOU MADE HER FEEL SHINY AND NEW

(The lights kick on and the Server Boys dance about.)

LIKE A VIRGIN
TOUCHED FOR THE VERY FIRST TIME
LIKE A VIRGIN
YOUR HEARTS BEAT BOTH IN TIME
YOU’VE GOT TO GIVE YOU ALL HER LOVE

SERVER BOYS:
GIVE YOU ALL HER LOVE

ZIDLER:
HER FEAR IS FADING FAST

SERVER BOYS:
FADING FAST

ZIDLER:
BEEN SAVING IT ALL…

ZIDLER and SERVER BOYS:
FOR YOU

ZIDLER:
ONLY LOVE CAN LAST

SERVER BOYS:
LOVE, LOVE, LOVE, LOVE, LOVE, LOVE, LOVE

ZIDLER:
SHE’S SO FINE

SERVER BOYS:
SHE’S SO FINE

ZIDLER:
AND SHE’S THINE

SERVER BOYS:
AND SHE’S THINE

ZIDLER:
SHE’LL BE YOURS

SERVER BOYS:
SHE’LL BE YOURS

ZIDLER:
‘TIL THE END OF TIME

SERVER BOYS:
‘TIL THE END OF TIME

ZIDLER:
‘CAUSE YOU’VE MADE HER FEEL
YES, YOU’VE MADE HER FEEL
SHE HAS NOTHING TO HIDE
LIKE A VIRGIN

SERVER BOYS:
LIKE A VIRGIN

ZIDLER:
TOUCHED FOR THE VERY FIRST TIME

SERVER BOYS:
FOR THE VERY, VERY, VERY FIRST TIME

ZIDLER:
LIKE A VIRGIN
YOUR HEARTS BEAT BOTH IN TIME
LIKE A VIRGIN
FEELS SO GOOD INSIDE
WHEN YOU HOLD HER AND YOU TOUCH HER

(Zidler chases the somewhat frightened Duke onto a “bed” made from a table, and pretends to be Satine as the Boys continue to dance.)
(Meanwhile, Christian is waiting in his garret, looking desperate, depressed, and more than a little disappointed.)
(Also, the Doctor is checking up on the unconscious Satine, who is starting to wake up.)

DUKE:
SHE’S SO FINE
AND SHE’S MINE
MAKES ME STRONG
YES, SHE MAKES ME BOLD
AND HER LOVE THAWED OUT
YES HER LOVE THAWED OUT
WHAT WAS SCARED AND COLD

(The Duke gets up after Zidler, and follows him menacingly with the Server Boys.)

ZIDLER:
(Running away)
LIKE A VIRGIN!

SERVER BOYS:
OOH, LIKE A VIRGIN

DUKE:
TOUCHED FOR THE VERY FIRST TIME

ZIDLER:
LIKE A VIRGIN

DUKE:
OUR HEARTS BEAT BOTH IN TIME

ZIDLER:
LIKE A VIRGIN!

SERVER BOYS:
VIRGIN

DUKE:
FEELS SO GOOD INSIDE
WHEN YOU HOLD HER AND YOU TOUCH HER
WHEN YOU HOLD HER AND YOU TOUCH HER

(The Duke approaches Zidler menacingly.)

ZIDLER and DUKE:
LIKE A VIRGIN!

SERVER BOYS:
LOVE, LOVE, LOVE, LOVE, LOVE (etc.)

(The Duke and Zidler dance together briefly and then everyone poses.)

CHRISTIAN (V.O.):
(As future Christian types.)
Harold Zidler’s brilliant lies had once again averted disaster.
(He looks out the window again.)
But no lie, however brilliant, could save Satine.

(Zidler, Marie, and the doctor are in Satine’s dressing room, with an unconscious Satine.)

DOCTOR:
Mousier Zidler, Mademoiselle Satine is dying.  She has Consumption.

ZIDLER:
My Little Sparrow is dying?

(Marie makes a cross, and then we see a view of Paris as day breaks.)

She mustn’t know, Marie.  The show must go on.

(We head into Christian’s humble garret, where Christian is writing and Satine sits on the bed in her pajamas.)

CHRISTIAN (V.O.):
All night, the Penniless Sitar Player had waited.  And now, for the first time, he felt the cold stab of jealousy.

(Christian stops writing and looks up at Satine, pained.  Satine coughs softly.)

CHRISTIAN:
Where were you last night?

SATINE:
I told you, I was sick.

CHRISTIAN:
(Gets up and sits by her.)
You don’t have to lie to me.

SATINE:
(Turns away from him.)
We have to end it.  Everyone knows.  Harold knows.  Sooner or later, the Duke will find out, too.

(Christian faces away from her, unbelieving and in the process of heartbreak.)

On opening night, I have to sleep with the Duke.
(Stands and walks to the balcony door.)
And the jealousy will drive you mad.

(Christian stands and heads quickly out the other balcony door and around to Satine.)

Christian…

CHRISTIAN:
Then, we’ll write a song.
(Puts his hands on her face as she tries to interrupt him.)
And we’ll put it in the show and no matter how bad things get, or whatever happens, whenever you hear it, or when you sing it, or whistle it, or it hum it…
(Kisses her forehead.)
Oh, then you’ll know, it’ll mean…it’ll mean that we love one another!  I won’t get jealous.
(Kisses her again.)

SATINE:
Things don’t work that way, Christian.  We have to end it.
(Walks out on the balcony.)

CHRISTIAN:
(Stares after her for a few moments.)
NEVER KNEW I COULD FEEL LIKE THIS
LIKE I’VE NEVER SEEN THE SKY BEFORE

(Satine blinks back tears.)

WANT TO VANISH INSIDE YOUR KISS

(Cut to a rehearsal with everyone.)

CHRISTIAN:
Now, this new scene is the scene where the Sitar Player writes a secret song for the Courtesan, so that whatever is happening, however bad things are…they remember their love.

(Satine smiles to herself.)

And, um…we could take it from your line, Satine.  So, let’s take it.  Let’s take it, if we may.

SATINE:
(As the Courtesan, speaking to the Argentinean.)
We must be careful.

ARGENTINEAN:
Fear not.  We will contact our love affair right under the Maharajah’s.

CHRISTIAN:
(Singing in the Argentinean’s place.)
SEASONS MAY CHANGE, WINTER TO SPRING

(The Argentinean passes out.)

ZIDLER:
Honestly, amigo, this is impossible!

CHRISTIAN:
(Back to singing for the Argentinean.)
BUT I LOVE YOU UNTIL THE END OF TIME

(Cut back to the balcony scene, and he has his arms around her as she turns to face him.)

COME WHAT MAY
COME WHAT MAY
I WILL LOVE YOU UNTIL MY DYING DAY

(Pull out of the city, and onto a hill, where the Duke and Satine are on the way to having a picnic, and Christian is holding the basket.)

SATINE and CHRISTIAN:
SUDDENLY THE WORLD SEEMS SUCH A PERFECT PLACE

DUKE:
My dear, a little frog!
(Goes after the frog, and seems to try to squash it o.O)

SATINE and CHRISTIAN:
SUDDENLY IT MOVES WITH SUCH A PERFECT GRACE

(Cut to Christian singing in the Argentinean’s place, during the rehearsal.)

SUDDENLY MY LIFE DOESN’T SEEM SUCH WASTE
IT ALL REVOLVES AROUND YOU
AND THERE’S NO MOUNTAIN TOO HIGH

(Short scenes flash:)
(Toulouse is trying to memorize his lines.)
(Satine and Christian are working on Christian’s bed and Christian is wearing the most adorable outfit you’ll ever see.)
(Satine and Christian are holding each other, naked, by the window with a sheet.)

NO RIVER TOO WIDE
SING OUT THIS SONG AND I’LL BE THERE BY YOUR SIDE
STORM CLOUDS MAY GATHER AND STARS MAY COLLIDE

CHRISTIAN:
BUT I LOVE YOU

SATINE:
I LOVE YOU

CHRISTIAN:
UNTIL THE END…

SATINE:
UNTIL THE END…

SATINE and CHRISTIAN:
OF TIME
COME WHAT MAY
COME WHAT MAY
I WILL LOVE YOU

(More short cuts:)
(Nini is talking to the Duke.)
(Satie is writing music with the orchestra.)
(Satine looks ill backstage.)
(Christian writes.)

CHRISTIAN:
(In rehearsal with Toulouse.)
The Magical Sitar Player falls from the roof, and says “The greatest thing you’ll ever learn is just to love and be loved in return.”
(Smiles down at Satine, who smiles back.)

(Cut to the Come What May rehearsal scene, with the Duke watching.  Nini comes up beside him.)

NINI:
This ending’s silly.  Why would the Courtesan go for the Penniless Writer?  Oops!  I mean Sitar Player.
(Gives him a look like he’s an idiot for not seeing it yet.)

(The Duke seems to make the connection, looking from Christian to Satine, on stage.  Nini goes back to the other Diamond Dogs and they share a laugh.)

SPECTACULAR CHORUS:
(Including Toulouse and The Doctor)
(Around Satine and the Argentinean, as Zidler, the Maharajah, sobs.)
COME WHAT MAY

ARGENTINEAN and SATINE:
I WILL LOVE YOU

SPECTACULAR CHORUS:
COME WHAT MAY

ARGENTINEAN and SATINE:
YES, I WILL LOVE YOU

SPECTACULAR CHORUS:
COME WHAT MAY

ARGENTINEAN and SATINE:
I WILL LOVE YOU

CHORUS, ARGENTINEAN, SATINE, and even CHRISTIAN:
‘TIL MY DYING DAY
(They all pose for the ending.)

DUKE:
I don’t like this ending.

(Everyone droops in confusion.)

ZIDLER:
Don’t like the ending, my dear Duke?

DUKE:
Why would the Courtesan choose a Penniless Sitar Player over the Maharajah, who is offering a lifetime of security?  That’s real love.  Once the…Sitar Player has satisfied his lust, he will leave the Courtesan with nothing.  I suggest that, in the end, the Courtesan choose the Maharajah.

TOULOUSE:
But…but, but sorry!  Sorry, but that ending does not uphold the bohemian ideals of truth, beauty, freedom and lov—

DUKE:
I don’t care about your ridiculous dogma!  Why shouldn’t the Courtesan choose the Maharajah!?

CHRISTIAN:
(Stands, has momentarily lost it.)
Because she doesn’t love you!!!

(Long, horrified pause, as everyone stares at Christian, who slowly realizes what he’s just done.)

Him…him, she doesn’t love…she doesn’t love him…

DUKE:
(Looks back at Satine.)
Now I see.  Mousier Zidler, this ending will be rewritten with the Courtesan choosing the Maharajah…and without the lovers’ secret song.  It will be rehearsed in the morning, ready for the opening tomorrow night.

ZIDLER:
But, my dear Duke!  That will be quite impossible…

SATINE:
(Putting on a brilliant façade.)
Harold…the poor Duke is being treated appallingly! These silly writers let their imaginations run away with them.
(Approaches the Duke.)
Now why don’t you and I have a little supper?  And then, afterwards, we can let Mousier Zidler know how we would prefer the story to end.  Hm?
(Christian is watching them, most agonized.)

(A few minutes later, backstage, Satine is heading to her dressing room and Christian stops her.)

CHRISTIAN:
I don’t want you to sleep with him…

SATINE:
He could destroy everything.
(Some people walk by laughing, and Christian is still looking agonized)
…It’s for us.
(Christian shakes his head.)
You promised.
(Studies him and then holds her face against his, speaking into his ear.)
You promised me you wouldn’t be jealous, you…  It will be all right.
(He shakes his head again, unable to look her in the eyes.)
Yes, it will…
(Touches his face and then starts to turn.)
He’s waiting.

CHRISTIAN:
(Reaches out to stop her, begging)
No…no…

SATINE:
(Into his ear, again.)
COME WHAT MAY…

CHRISTIAN:
(Looks up at her after she pulls back.)
Come what may.
(Turns and leaves.)

CHRISTIAN (V.O.):
(After typing.)
She had gone to the tower to save us all. And for our part, we could do nothing but wait.

(Everyone is waiting quietly in the darkened Moulin Rouge.  Christian sits down next to Toulouse.)
(Satine walks into the dark Gothic Tower, dressed sexily, where the Duke is waiting.)

SATINE:
My dear Duke, I hope I have not kept you waiting.

(In the Moulin Rouge, everyone seems concerned, and Christian takes a swig of Absinthe.)

NINI:
(Plopping herself on Christian’s lap.)
Don’t worry, Shakespeare!  You’ll get your ending.  Once the Duke gets his…end…in.

(Christian stands and lunges at her, but the Argentinean keeps him away.)

You get your hands off me!

ARGENTINEAN:
(Walking to Christian after comforting Nini.)
Never fall in love with a woman who sells herself.  It always ends bad!!

(Everyone jumps a little.  Toulouse watches, totally drunk.  Christian looks ready to cry or kill himself.)
(In the Gothic Tower, Satine is removing her gloves.)

SATINE:
The boy has a ridiculous obsession with me.  I mean, I indulge his fantasy because he’s talented.  We need him.  But only until tomorrow.

(In the Moulin Rouge, the Argentinean steps out to the center of the room.)

ARGENTINEAN:
We have a dance!  In the brothels of Buenos Aires.
(Cues the lights and music.)
Tells the story of a prostitute…
(Cues the spotlight on Nini.  Everyone laughs and whistles, and she joins the Argentinean.)
And a man who falls in love with her.

(They start to dance, mimicking what the Argentinean is saying, while, in the tower Satine and the Duke share a kiss, preparing for their supper.)

First, there is desire. Then, passion.

(Other male dancers are beginning to approach, and Nini reaches out.)

Then, suspicion, jealousy, anger, betrayal!  When love is for the highest bidder, there can be no trust.  Without trust, there is no love!  Jealousy…yes, jealousy will drive you mad!

(Nini now dances with the other men.  Christian is taking this to heart.)

ROXANNE
YOU DON’T HAVE TO PUT ON THAT RED LIGHT
WALK THE STREETS FOR MONEY
YOU DON’T CARE IF IT’S WRONG OR IF IT IS RIGHT
ROXANNE
YOU DON’T HAVE TO WEAR THAT DRESS TONIGHT
ROXANNE
YOU DON’T HAVE TO SELL YOUR BODY TO THE NIGHT

(Christian starts to slowly move toward the door, miserably anguished.)
(Satine and the Duke are sharing an intense supper.)
(More dancers join the Roxanne dance.)

CHRISTIAN:
HIS EYES UPON YOUR FACE
HIS HAND UPON YOUR HAND
HIS LIPS CARESS YOUR SKIN
IT’S MORE THAN I CAN STAND

ARGENTINEAN:
ROXANNE

CHRISTIAN:
WHY DOES MY HEART CRY

ARGENTINEAN:
ROXANNE

CHRISTIAN:
FEELINGS I CAN’T FIGHT?

(Satine coughs softly, the Duke approaches her, and they kiss.)

YOU’RE FREE TO LEAVE ME
BUT JUST DON’T DECIEVE ME
AND PLEASE BELIEVE ME WHEN I SAY
I LOVE YOU

(Everything in the Moulin Rouge seems to take a silent pause.)

DUKE:
If this production succeeds, you will no longer be a can-can dancer, but an actress.  I will make you…a star.

(Satine puts on a smile, and the Duke shows her a beautiful diamond choker, takes it out, and puts it on her.)
(The Moulin Rouge is quiet, as if everyone knows what’s happening in the Gothic Tower.)

Accept it as a gift from this Maharajah to his Courtesan.

SATINE:
(Awed by the gift.)
And…and the ending?

(Chocolat leaves the Moulin Rouge.)

DUKE:
(Smiles disgustingly.)
Let Zidler keep his fairytale ending.

(The dancing starts again.)

ARGENTINEAN:
ROXANNE

CHRISTIAN:
(Heading outside and down the road.)
WHY DOES MY HEART CRY

ARGENTINEAN:
YOU DON’T HAVE TO PUT ON THAT RED LIGHT
ROXANNE

CHRISTIAN:
FEELINGS I CAN’T FIGHT?

ARGENTINEAN:
YOU DON’T HAVE TO DO YOUR HAIR TONIGHT
ROXANNE

CHRISTIAN:
YOU’RE FREE TO LEAVE ME
BUT JUST DON’T DECIEVE ME
AND PLEASE BELIEVE ME WHEN I SAY
I LOVE YOU

(Christian looks up into the Gothic Tower, and sees Satine with the Duke.)
(Satine looks down, the Duke all over her, and sees Christian.)

SATINE:
COME WHAT MAY
I WILL LOVE YOU ‘TIL MY DYING…day…
(To the Duke)
No.

(Christian looks away.)

DUKE:
(Pulls back from her.)
No?
(Follows her gaze and sees Christian standing there.)
Oh, I see.  Our very own Penniless Sitar Player.

(Satine moves away from him, as Christian continues to walk down the road.  The Duke turns and shuts the window behind him.)

SATINE:
Dear Duke…

DUKE:
Silence!!!
(Grabs her wrists and forces her back as she cries out.)
You…made me believe that you loved me!

SATINE:
No…

(The Duke reaches around and snaps her new choker off, just as the dancers start the last part of their dance.)

ARGENTINEAN:
ROXANNE

(Christian is heading up to his garret, feeling deep jealousy.)
(The Duke chases Satine around the table.)

CHRISTIAN:
WHY DOES MY HEART CRY
FEELINGS I CAN’T FIGHT?

ARGENTINEAN:
ROXANNE

(The Duke knocks Satine to the floor.)

CHORUS:
WHY DOES MY HEART CRY?

ARGENTINEAN:
YOU DON’T HAVE TO PUT ON THAT RED LIGHT

CHORUS:
FEELINGS I CAN’T FIGHT?

ARGENTINEAN:
YOU DON’T HAVE TO WEAR THAT DRESS TONIGHT

(The Duke has his arms tightly around a very frightened Satine.)
(In the dance, Nini is being tossed around by all the men.)

DUKE:
(Sings mockingly into Satine’s ear.)
WHY DOES MY HEART CRY
(Kisses her shoulder roughly, as she cries out again, tears streaming down her cheeks.)

ARGENTINEAN:
ROXANNE

(Christian is at his window, crying out with agonizing jealousy.)

DUKE:
(Tearing the sobbing Satine’s clothes off.)
FEELINGS I CAN’T FIGHT?

ARGENTINEAN:
ROXANNE

(In the dance, the Argentinean pretends to kill Nini once she gets tossed to him.)
(The Duke has forced Satine down onto the table, half of her clothes ripped off, when Chocolat suddenly appears and punches him out.  Satine sits up, shaken and frightened, and they both look down at the unconscious and bleeding Duke.)
(Christian stands quietly at his window, staring out at the Moulin Rouge.)
(Everyone else is now sitting back down in the Moulin Rouge, waiting boredly and with an air of sadness about them.)
(Suddenly Satine and Chocolat burst into Christian’s garret.  Satine wraps her arms around the receiving Christian immediately, still sobbing)

SATINE:
I couldn’t!  I couldn’t go through with it!  I saw you there and I felt terribly and I couldn’t pretend.  (Sobs.)  And the Duke, he saw!  He saw and he…and he…  Christian, I love you.

CHRISTIAN:
(Holding her tightly.)
It’s okay…

SATINE:
And I couldn’t do it; I didn’t want to pretend anymore.  I didn’t want to lie, I don’t want… (Pulls back a bit.) And he knows.  He knows, he saw…

CHRISTIAN:
It’s all right; you don’t have to pretend anymore.  We’ll leave.  We’ll leave tonight.

SATINE:
Leave?  But…the show…

CHRISTIAN:
I don’t care.
(Wipes a tear from her cheek.)
I don’t care about the show.  We have each other, and that’s all that matters.

SATINE:
(Smiles a bit.)
Yes.  As long as we have each other…
(Kisses him.)
We have each other.

CHRISTIAN:
(Grabs his coat.)
Chocolat, take Miss Satine to her dressing room and get the things she needs.  No one must see you, do you understand?

CHOCOLAT:
I understand.

CHRISTIAN:
(Puts his coat on her.)
Darling, you go and pack.  And I’ll be waiting.

(Satine laughs tearfully and they kiss each other hungrily.)
(In the Gothic Tower, someone is cleaning the wound on the Duke’s head, while Zidler and Warner stand by.)

DUKE:
It’s the boy.  He has bewitched her with words.  I want her back, Zidler.  Find her…
(Hisses in pain and shoves the person away.)
…And tell her that the show will end my way and she will come to me when the curtain falls.  Or I’ll have the boy killed.

ZIDLER:
Killed?

(Warner steps out from the shadows.)

DUKE:
Killed.

(Satine is in her dressing room, rushing to pack up her things, when she sees Zidler in the mirror and whirls to face him in surprise.  Marie is there, too.)

ZIDLER:
Forgive the intrusion, Cherub.

SATINE:
(Turns and puts her own coat on, having taken off Christian’s.)
You’re wasting your time, Harold.

ZIDLER:
Albeit.  You don’t understand.  The Duke is going to kill Christian.

SATINE:
(Gasps a little, looking at herself in the mirror.)
No…
(Tears are already building up in her eyes.)

ZIDLER:
The Duke is insanely jealous.  Unless you do his ending and sleep with him tomorrow night, the Duke will have Christian killed.

SATINE:
(Composes herself and turns back to Zidler.)
He can’t scare us.

ZIDLER:
He’s a powerful man.  You know he can do it.

(Satine stares at him for a moment and then throws her coat off, picking up her things.  Zidler stands.)

What are you doing?

SATINE:
(Crying again, as she puts Christian’s coat back on.)
I don’t need you anymore!  All my life, you made me believe I was only worth what someone would pay for me!  But Christian loves me.  He loves me, Harold.  He loves me, and that is worth everything!  We’re going away from you, away from the Duke, away from the Moulin Rouge! Goodbye, Harold.
(Turns and walks to the door.)

ZIDLER:
You’re dying, Satine.
(Satine stops.)
You’re dying.

SATINE:
(Breathes and coughs lightly.)
Another trick, Harold?

ZIDLER:
No, My Love.  The doctor told us.

SATINE:
(Looks back at them.)
Marie?

(Marie just looks at her, tears shining in her own eyes.  Satine takes a few moments to digest this.)

I’m dying…
I WAS A FOOL TO BELIEVE
A FOOL TO BELIEVE
(Coughs again, tears flowing down her cheeks.)
IT ALL ENDS TODAY
YES, IT ALL ENDS TODAY
(Sits down with Marie.)

ZIDLER:
Send Christian away.  Only you can save him.

SATINE:
He’ll fight for me.

ZIDLER:
Yes.  Unless he believes you don’t love him.

SATINE:
What?

ZIDLER:
You’re a great actress, Satine.  Make him believe you don’t love him.

SATINE:
(Almost looks ill at the idea, shakes her head.)
No.

ZIDLER:
Use your talent to save him.  Hurt him.  Hurt him to save him.  There is no other way.  The show must go on, Satine.  We are creatures of the underworld.  We can’t afford to love.

SATINE:
(Has slowly been accepting it all, gazes at the bird in the gilded cage.)
TODAY’S A DAY

SATINE and ZIDLER:
WHEN DREAMING…

SATINE:
…ENDS

(Later, Zidler walks down the halls backstage at the Moulin Rouge, where people are working.)

ZIDLER:
Another hero, another mindless crime
Behind the curtain, in the pantomime
ON AND ON
DOES ANYBODY KNOW WHAT WE ARE LIVING FOR?

ZIDLER and MAIDS:
WHATEVER HAPPENS, WE LEAVE IT ALL TO CHANCE
ANOTHER HEARTACHE, ANOTHER FAILED ROMANCE
ON AND ON
DOES ANYBODY KNOW WHAT WE ARE LIVING FOR?

ZIDLER:
(Walks out onto the stage, where people are working and things are still being built.  He walks down the aisle to the other side of the theatre.)
THE SHOW MUST GO ON
THE SHOW MUST GO ON

ZIDLER and MAIDS:
OUTSIDE THE DAWN IS BREAKING, ON THE STAGE
THAT HOLDS OUR FINAL DESTINY
THE SHOW MUST GO ON
THE SHOW MUST GO ON

SATINE:
(Has gotten dressed and fixed herself up nicely, looking at herself in the mirror of the dressing room.)
INSIDE MY HEART IS BREAKING
MY MAKEUP MAY BE FLAKING
BUT MY SMILE STILL STAYS ON

ZIDLER and MAIDS:
THE SHOW MUST GO ON
THE SHOW MUST GO ON

SATINE and MAIDS:
(Satine walks out onto the stage.)
I’LL TOP THE BILL
I’LL EARN THE KILL
I HAVE TO FIND THE WILL TO CARRY…

SATINE, ZIDLER and MAIDS:
ON WITH THE
ON WITH THE
ON WITH THE SHOW

ZIDLER:
On with the show!

(Satine walks past Zidler…)

On with the show!
THE SHOW MUST GO ON

(…And out onto the street, toward Christian’s garret.)
(Christian is standing in his window, when Satine walks in.  He turns to her and she just stares at him.)

CHRISTIAN:
What’s wrong?

SATINE:
I’m staying with the Duke.  After I left you, the Duke came to see me and he offered me everything.  Everything that I’ve ever dreamed of.  He has one condition.  I must never see you again.  I’m sorry.

CHRISTIAN:
(Takes a step forward.)
What are you talking about?

SATINE:
(Moves away from him as he moves closer, and avoids eye contact.)
You knew who I was…

CHRISTIAN:
What are you saying?  What about last night, what we said—

SATINE:
I don’t expect you to understand.  The difference between you and I is that you can leave any time you choose.  But this is my home.  The Moulin Rouge is my home.
(Turns away from him to hide her pain.)

CHRISTIAN:
No…there must be something else, this can’t be real, you…

(Satine is breathing a little too rapidly, either from her disease, or from holding back tears, or both)

There’s something the matter, tell me what it is.

(Satine hurries past him and out the door, coughing a few times.  Christian catches her at the door.)

Tell me what’s wrong!  Tell me the truth!  Tell me the truth!

SATINE:
(Stops and looks him in the eyes.)
The truth?  The truth is I am the Hindu Courtesan, and I choose the Maharajah.  That’s how the story really ends.
(She gazes at him for a moment, and then he lets her go.)

(As storm clouds gather, rain falls and lightning flashes, Christian’s heart has almost visibly been ripped in half.)

ZIDLER:
(Dressed as the Maharajah)
Jealousy has driven him mad!

(Christian trembles with unbearable anguish, as Satine walks back to the Moulin Rouge in a similar state.)
(A little later, Christian runs to the front of the Moulin Rouge, in the storm.)

CHRISTIAN:
Satine!!!  Satine!!!

(Satine sits at her window, tears streaming down her cheeks.  Two guards grab Christian’s arms and haul him across the street.)

Satine!!

(One guard hits him hard across the face and they walk away as he falls to the wet concrete.)
(The Bohos lay the emotionally and physically battered Christian down on his bed and help remove some wet clothes.)
(At twilight, Christian sits on his bed with a blanket wrapped around him, and stares off numbly.  Toulouse is standing by the bed, smiling comfortingly.)

TOULOUSE:
Things aren’t always as they seem.

CHRISTIAN:
Things are exactly the way they seem.

TOULOUSE:
Christian, you may see me only as a drunken, vice-ridden gnome whose friends are just pimps and girls from the brothels.  But I know about art and love, if only because I long for it with every fiber of my being.  She loves you.  I know it, I know she loves you.

CHRISTIAN:
Go away, Toulouse.  Leave me alone.
(More firmly, when Toulouse doesn’t go.)
Go.  Away.
(Toulouse hasn’t moved.)
Go away!!!

(Toulouse takes his coat and leaves, with a last sad look at his tormented friend.)

CHRISTIAN (V.O.):
I wanted to shut out what Toulouse had said.  But he had filled me with doubt, and there was only one way to be sure.

(Christian pawns his typewriter for cash.)

I had to know.

(Christian stands in the alley outside the Moulin Rouge.)

So I returned to the Moulin Rouge.  One last time.

(Inside the Moulin Rouge, the show is just starting.)

ZIDLER:
(As the Maharajah.)
She’s mine!

(The curtains open behind him, and cast is dancing on stage, Toulouse in his Magical Sitar costume.)

TOULOUSE:
I only speak the truth
I only speak the truth
I only speak the truth
I only speak the truth
I only speak the truth
I only speak the truth
I only speak the truth!

NINI:
CHAMMA CHAMMA HE CHAMMA CHAMMA

(Christian climbs in through a window backstage.)

CHAMMA CHAMMA, BAAJERE MERI BENDARIYA
RE CHAMMA CHAMMA, BAAJERE MERI BENDARIYA

(Christian sneaks around, hiding from Warner.)

TERE PAAS AAWOUN TERI
SAANSON MEIN SAMAVOUN RAJA
CHAMMA CHAMMA HE CHAMMA CHAMMA
CHAMMA CHAMMA, BAAJERE MERI BENDARIYA
RE CHAMMA CHAMMA, BAAJERE MERI BENDARIYA

NINI and CHORUS:
BAAJERE MERI BENDARIYA
BENDARIYA

(Christian makes it past Warner.)
(On stage, Satine comes out, singing high notes, and there is wild applause.  She is cut off for a moment, with a cough, but quickly composes herself and dances with the others.)
 
 

SATINE:
KISS, HAND, DIAMONDS, BEST FRIEND

(Zidler looks back at the Duke in the audience who is smirking in satisfaction.)

KISS, GRAND, DIAMONDS, BEST FRIEND
MEN, COLD, GIRLS, OLD
AND WE ALL LOSE OUR CHARMS IN THE END

(Christian sees her out on stage and then continues.)

SATINE and CHORUS:
DIAMONDS ARE A
DIAMONDS ARE A
DIAMONDS ARE A
DIAMONDS ARE A
DIAMONDS ARE A
DIAMONDS ARE A
DIAMONDS ARE A…

(Satine is taken upstage where diamonds are placed on her neck.)

SATINE:
GIRL’S BEST FRIEND

ZIDLER:
(Wraps his arms around her from behind.)
She is mine.

DUKE:
(To himself.)
She is mine.

(The lights go out.)
(Toulouse is walking backstage with a bottle in his hand, the Argentinean following.)

TOULOUSE:
I know she still loves him, there’s got to be a reason…

ARGENTINEAN:
How about, one of them is a Duke and the other—
(Passes out and falls to a hallway below, where Christian was moving about.)

TOULOUSE:
Oh, you agree, something is wrong.

ZIDLER:
(On stage.)
I raise high my ceremonial wedding sword and… join with us in celebration of our sacred…

(Christian is heading back to Satine’s dressing room, with part of the Argentinean’s costume on.)
(Satine is hacking up more blood in her dressing room.)

TOULOUSE:
(From above the stage.)
What a magnificent performance.

MARIE:
(Giving Satine her medicine.)
A little bit more for me.  There you go, Lovie.  That’s a girl.

WARNER:
(Grabs Zidler, who is now backstage, where Toulouse can see and hear them.)
The boy is here.

ZIDLER:
We told Satine that if Christian were to come here, he’d be killed!

WARNER:
He very soon will be.

(Christian walks into Satine’s dressing room, and she whirls around.  They stare at each other.)
(Zidler goes back on stage.)

TOULOUSE:
(To himself.)
He’ll be killed?  That’s it…that’s why she’s pushing him away, to save him.  That’s it, that’s it.  (Looks around.) Christian—
(Cries out as the platform he’s on is raised up higher.  Sees Warner moving quickly down the corridor.)
No!  Don’t—Oh, God, this is high up!

CHRISTIAN:
(Back in the dressing room.)
I’ve come to pay my bill.

SATINE:
(Pauses and then hurries past him.)
You shouldn’t be here, Christian.  Just leave.

(Christian stares off for a moment and then turns and follows her.)

TOULOUSE:
(Making his way hurriedly along the upper platforms.)
Killed, killed, killed…I must warn him!

(Satine is trying to hurry away from Christian, and losing her breath quickly.  Christian is following determinedly.)

CHRISTIAN:
(Stops her.)
You made me believe that you loved me.  Why shouldn’t I pay you?

SATINE:
Please, go, Christian.

MARIE:
(Yelling after them.)
She’s got to get on the stage!

ZIDLER:
(Covering for the Argentinean’s absence on stage.)
Jealousy has driven the Sitar Player…into hiding!

CHRISTIAN:
You did your job so very, very well!

STAGE MANAGER:
[Something.]

MARIE:
(Comes up behind the Stage Manager.)
She’s got to get on stage…

CHRISTIAN:
(Following the retreating Satine again.)
Why can’t I pay you like everyone else does!?

SATINE:
(Turns to him, pleading)
Don’t…Christian, there’s no point.  Just leave.
(Turns and hurries away, Christian chasing after her again.)

TOULOUSE:
[Something.]

ZIDLER:
(Continuing whatever he was saying on stage.)
But I have found him!

(Someone tries to stop Christian, but he shoves the man over as Satine sees Warner lurking around a bend, gun ready, and screams.)

SATINE:
(Faces Christian again, sobbing and begging and trying to block the gun.)
Go…go…

CHRISTIAN:
(Holding the cash out for her.)
If it wasn’t real, why can’t I pay you?

TOULOUSE:
(Witnessing Warner getting closer from above, with no way down.)
Christian!  Christian!

ZIDLER:
(Continuing still.)
Open the door!

CHRISTIAN:
(Frustrated and desperate.)
Let me pay!  Let me pay!

(Satine sees Warner getting closer.)

ZIDLER:
(To someone offstage.)
Open the door!

CHRISTIAN:
Tell me it wasn’t real!  Tell me…

(The stagehand works on opening the door.)

ZIDLER:
(Back in Maharajah mode.)
Open the door!

CHRISTIAN:
(Ignoring Satine’s sobbing pleas.)
Tell me you don’t love me!

(Warner is getting closer.)

TOULOUSE:
Christian!!

CHRISTIAN:
Tell me you don’t love me!!!

(Just as Warner is about to make the shot, the “door” opens, revealing Christian hovering over Satine, on the floor.  Warner hides.  There is a murmur among the crowd, and the Duke looks confused and angry.)

ZIDLER:
(After a pause.)
Hahaha!  I am not fooled!  Though he has shaved of his beard, and dons a disguise, my eyes do not lie!  For it is he, the same Penniless Sitar Player!

AUDIENCE:
Ohhh…

ZIDLER:
Driven mad by jealousy!

TOULOUSE:
(Looking down at Warner, who’s finding somewhere else to shoot from.)
Oh, God…No.

(Christian drags Satine downstage a bit, and lets her fall back to the floor, where she coughs a few times.)

CHRISTIAN:
(Speaking apparently to the Maharajah, but actually to the Duke.)
This woman is yours now.
(Throws the cash to the floor next to her.)
I’ve paid my whore.
(Looks down at Satine, who is gazing up at him, with tears flowing from her eyes.)
I owe you nothing.  And you’re nothing to me.
(Holding back sobs of his own.)
Thank you for curing me of my ridiculous obsession with love.
(Walks off the stage.)

(Warner is watching with odd interest, and Toulouse looks like his whole world has been destroyed.  Everyone on stage knows how real this is, and Christian stops to stare at the Duke for a moment before walking down the aisle.)

TOULOUSE:
I can’t remember my line…

ZIDLER:
(Walks over to Satine, keeping the show going.)
This Sitar Player doesn’t love you!  See, he flees the kingdom!
(Kneels by her and whispers to her.)
Pumpkin, it’s for the best.  You know it is.  The show must go on.

(Christian is starting to look numb again as he walks down the aisle, and Warner starts to put his gun away, seeing Christian leaving.)

And now, my bride, it is time for you to raise your voice to the heavens and say your wedding vows!

(Satine lets out another sob and then tries to compose herself for the show, as Zidler helps her up and Chocolat comes out.  Christian is taking the Argentinean’s coat off.)

TOULOUSE:
I’ve got it!  I’ve got it!  Christian—
(Screams, interrupting Zidler, as he starts to fall to the stage, but catches himself, dangling from the platforms.)
(Loudly.)
The greatest thing you’ll ever learn is just to love and be loved in return!!

(As his voice echoes, something inside Satine seems to click, the actors on stage and the audience glance around, and Christian pauses.)

SATINE:
(Slowly turns around.)
NEVER KNEW I COULD FEEL LIKE THIS

(Christian’s face nearly crumbles, and he slowly starts to walk again.  This is just a cruel game.)

LIKE I’VE NEVER SEEN THE SKY BEFORE
WANT TO VANISH INSIDE YOUR KISS

(Christian stops again.  It sounds so real.)

EVERY DAY I’M LOVING YOU MORE AND MORE
LISTEN TO MY HEART, CAN YOU HEAR IT SING?

(Christian turns slowly, and sees that it is real.  The life seems to float back into his eyes.)

COME BACK TO ME AND FORGIVE EVERYTHING!

(She takes a gasp for air, nearly coughing.  The Duke smiles, having no idea that she is singing to Christian.  Christian is watching her, tearful with happiness.  Satie struggles to keep the orchestra with her.)

SEASONS MAY CHANGE, WINTER TO SPRING
I love you.
‘TIL THE END OF TIME

CHRISTIAN:
COME WHAT MAY

(The audience turns to him at the other end of the theatre, in surprise, especially the Duke.  Satine smiles, tearful in the same way as Christian.)

COME WHAT MAY
COME WHAT MAY
(Heads up to the stage, as Satine walks downstage.)
COME WHAT MAY
I WILL LOVE YOU

SATINE:
I WILL LOVE YOU

CHRISTIAN:
UNTIL MY DYING DAY

SATINE:
DYING DAY

(They reach each other, and the Duke looks royally pissed.)

SATINE and CHRISTIAN:
COME WHAT MAY

CHRISTIAN:
COME WHAT MAY

SATINE:
COME WHAT MAY

(They put their arms around each other.)

SATINE and CHRISTIAN:
I WILL LOVE YOU UNTIL MY DYING—

(Toulouse shouts loudly.  The Duke signals Warner, who takes aim at Christian.)

TOULOUSE:
Christian!  He’s got a gun!
(Breaks the platform and swings onto the stage, knocking the gun out of Warner’s hand.)

(Petit Princess screams and runs from the gun.)

They’re trying to kill you!

(The audience laughs at Toulouse.)

ZIDLER:
Shut up!

TOULOUSE:
Look, he’s got a gun!

ZIDLER:
Guards, seize them!

THE DOCTOR:
Vive le vie Boheme!

(A bunch of flashes [“bombs”] go off on stage, and everyone runs around crazily.  Arabia kicks Warner in the head a few times, but he manages to get the gun.  However, the Argentinean pops out of the door at that moment, knocking the gun out of his hand again.)

ARGENTINEAN:
No problem!  Go back to work!

(Everyone starts dancing again.)

TOULOUSE:
NO MATTER WHAT YOU SAY

CAST:
THE SHOW IS ENDING OUR WAY

(Zidler knocks Warner over, and Satie runs up on stage.)

SO STAND YOUR GROUND
FOR FREEDOM, BEAUTY, TRUTH, AND LOVE

(The Duke is trying to point out to Warner where the gun is on stage.)

CHORUS:
HOW WONDERFUL LIFE IS

SATINE:
ONE DAY I’LL FLY AWAY

CHRISTIAN:
MY GIFT IS MY SONG

CHORUS:
THE CHILDREN OF THE REVOLUTION
NO YOU WON’T FOOL THE CHILDREN OF THE REVOLUTION

SATINE:
ONE DAY I’LL FLY AWAY

CHRISTIAN:
MY GIFT IS MY SONG

CHORUS:
NO YOU WON’T FOOL THE CHILDREN OF THE REVOLUTION
NO YOU WON’T FOOL THE CHILDREN OF THE REVOLUTION

SATINE:
ONE DAY I’LL FLY AWAY

CHRISTIAN:
MY GIFT IS MY SONG

(Hiding behind a tambourine, Warner is trying to reach for his gun.  Petit Princess drops something on him, and the gun flies out of his hand.)

CHORUS:
COME WHAT MAY

SATINE and CHRISTIAN:
I WILL LOVE YOU

CHORUS:
COME WHAT MAY

SATINE and CHRISTIAN:
I WILL LOVE YOU

CHORUS:
COME WHAT MAY

SATINE and CHRISTIAN:
YES, I WILL LOVE YOU

(The Duke gets up to leave, angrily, but hears the gun clatter to the aisle behind him and turns.)

CHORUS:
COME WHAT MAY

(The Duke picks up the gun.)

SATINE and CHRISTIAN:
(Being lifted up, facing each other, by chorus members.)
I WILL LOVE YOU

DUKE:
(Rushing to the stage, with the gun pointed at Christian.)
My way!  My way!  My way!!  My way!!!

(Zidler punches him before he gets there, and the gun breaks through a window and bounces off the Eiffel Tower, as the Duke falls back.)

CAST:
‘TIL MY DYING DAY

(The Duke sits up dejectedly as the curtain falls.  The audience gives a standing ovation, applauding wildly.  The entire cast is ecstatic, especially Christian and Satine, who are holding each other’s hands.)

STAGE MANAGER:
Stand by for curtain call!  Dancers, positions please!

(Christian and Satine kiss, and then Christian starts to pull Satine over for curtain call.)
(Future Christian sits on his bed, reading over what he’s written, in deep pain.)
(Satine halts, taking deep gasps for air.)

CHRISTIAN:
(Turns and catches her before she falls, the happy smile fading from his face.)
Satine!

(She begins to cough violently.  Toulouse, Zidler, and other cast members notice what’s happening, their smiles replaced with dread.)

Satine, what’s the matter?

(Christian is easing the coughing and wheezing Satine onto her back, while he kneels over her.)

What…darling…darling, what’s the matter?  Darling…  Satine, what’s the matter?

(Satine’s breathing sounds raspy and violent, worse than it’s been yet.)

God… Oh my God…
(Sees blood dripping from her mouth and touches it.)
Somebody get some help!!!

ZIDLER:
Hold the curtain!  Fetch the doctor!

(The Stage Manager runs to get the doctor.)

SATINE:
I’m sorry, Christian…I…I’m…I’m…I’m dying…

(Marie watches sadly.  Toulouse is covering his ears.)

CHRISTIAN:
Shhh…shhh…it’s all right.

(The cast is all watching silently.)

SATINE:
(Making painful-sounding noises.)
I’m so sorry…

CHRISTIAN:
No, you’ll be all right.  You’ll be all right.

SATINE:
Cold…I’m cold…cold…  Hold me.

(Christian holds her close, looking so afraid.)

CHRISTIAN:
(Smiles a little for her.)
I love you.

SATINE:
(Smiles back, and can only whisper.)
You’ve got to go on, Christian.

CHRISTIAN:
(Voice breaking, he sounds almost hopeful.)
Can’t go on without you, though

SATINE:
You’ve got so much to give…
(Reaches up and touches his face as he tries to hold back his tears.)
Tell our story, Christian.

CHRISTIAN:
(Shakes his head and starts to weep.)
No…

SATINE:
Yes… Promise me.  Promise me…
(Christian nods.)
That way, I’ll…I’ll always be with you.

(Satine takes a few soft, gasping breaths, smiling for Christian as he weeps and kisses her one last time.  Christian pulls back, and Satine is dead.)
(Future Christian closes his eyes against the pain.)
(The Duke leaves the theatre.  All of their friends at the Moulin Rouge have their own reactions: Chocolat removes his turban, Zidler looks away, Marie stares, tears stream down Toulouse’s cheeks…but the only sound behind the curtain is Christian’s weeping as he cradles Satine’s body, rocking back and forth.)
(He gazes into her dead eyes for a moment and then sobs with all of his heart, still holding her close.)
(We are brought up and out of the Moulin Rouge. The audience is still applauding wildly.  The Duke walks alone on the snowy path.  Toulouse rises from the windmill again.)

TOULOUSE:
THERE WAS A BOY
A VERY STRANGE, ENCHANTED BOY

(As we pass the windmill, to Christian’s garret, it becomes day.  The “L’amour” sign becomes “L’ament.”  Satine’s bird sits in its gilded cage outside Christian’s window.  The bearded Christian types.)

CHRISTIAN (V.O.):
Days turned into weeks.  Weeks turned into months.  And then, one not-so-very special day, I went to my typewriter, I sat down, and I wrote our story.  A story about a time, a story about a place, a story about the people.  But above all things, a story about love.  A love that will live forever.
The end.

(The curtain closes over the words “The end.” And behind the Conductor.)

THE GREATEST THING
YOU’LL EVER LEARN
IS JUST TO LOVE
AND BE LOVED
IN RETURN

(The curtain fades, and then the Conductor fades.)
(A spotlight lights up the words:)

IN MEMORIUM
LEONARD
LUHRMANN
1934-1999

Send comments or corrections to Kate Sith.

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