Boulevard of Broken Dreams
The door swung open and banged against the wall with a loud thud. I stood in the frame, arms full of groceries, as the wind whipped my hair wildly around my face. I quickly stepped through the threshold and left the door opened behind me as I headed towards the kitchen to unload the weight of the groceries from my arms. I turned back to the door and retrieved the keys from the handle.
I stepped back outside and quickly plucked the mail from the tiny box perched on the outside wall of my apartment. I skimmed through the mound of bills as I stepped back inside and pushed the door closed behind me, making sure to secure the lock. I threw the bills on the counter and put the groceries away, with the exception of the pint of mint chocolate ice cream I'd purchased. I grabbed a spoon from the dish drain and made my way into the den for an hour or so of mindless television.
I walk a lonely road
The only one that I have ever known
Don't know where it goes
But it's home to me and I walk alone
It was late when I finally flipped the set off and threw away the empty ice cream container. I tossed the spoon into the sink and headed toward the bathroom to shower before sliding between the sheets of my warm bed. As I drifted to sleep, my mind came alive with visions of wild stories and things I wished I had the time to accomplish in life. Tonight wasn't any different.
I dreamed I stood in the middle of a huge stage in the darkness. Nothing could be heard around me. My heart pounded and my hands felt clammy. I swallowed hard and waited. Suddenly a crescendo of music sounded and a spotlight shone down on me. I took a breath as my lips parted and words belted from deep within. The fans stood to their feet, clapping and cheering me on with adoration. My entire being was filled with adrenaline and I felt as though I were flying.
Suddenly through the elation, I heard a horrible noise behind me and turned in the direction of the commotion. My heart stopped as my eyes caught a glimpse of one of the speakers as it went up in flames. The shrill ring of the fire alarm rang loudly to warn of the mishap.
My eyes bolted open and the dream was over. I slowly pulled an arm out from the warmth of the bed and switched off the alarm clock that played the part of the fire alarm in my dream. I sighed as I looked at the illuminated numbers displayed on the front of the box. Another day of broken dreams lay before me.
I walk this empty street
On the boulevard of broken dreams
Where the city sleeps
And I'm the only one and I walk alone
I readied myself for the monotony of another day's work. I loved my job, but wondered how long I'd have to perform menial labor. The scariest thought was one of having to be stuck at that job forever. I shook the thought out of my head and busied myself with the routine of my daily tasks.
I would often catch myself daydreaming of the day a wealthy businessman would come into the restaurant where I waitress, would somehow see the talent I possess as I carried out my duties, and offer me a job on the spot. I'd smile at the thought, but quickly dismissed it as my boss threw a stern glance my way with the silent meaning of, "Get back to work!"
My shadow's the only one that walks beside me
My shallow heart's the only thing that's beating
Sometimes I wish someone out there will find me
'Til then I walk alone
My lunch hour was spent scarfing down a cheeseburger as I ran around town paying the bills I could afford this week. Of course, as part of my daily route, I'd ride past Raindance Studios and imagine myself as a signed agent.
I could envision myself rushing through the doors, sheet music in one hand and a coffee in the other. I'd nod at the front desk clerk and make my way through the maze of hallways before coming to a stop at the recording booth. I'd push the door open and step in making sure to greet my manager and the backup singers and whomever else is involved when recording a song before taking my place at the microphone.
I smiled at the thought.
I'm walking down the line
That divides me somewhere in my mind
On the border line of the edge
And where I walk alone
My smile was swiftly replaced with a frown as I turned my car back in the direction of the restaurant to finish out my shift. I had spent too long daydreaming and was running late back to work. I hurried into the parking lot and parked at the nearest place I could find. I tried to slip back in unnoticed but my boss was standing at the time clock waiting for my arrival.
I knew the routine all too well. I quietly followed the boss to his office and took a seat across from his desk. I listened as he gave me the same lecture he's spewed out to me time and again. I tried not to cringe when he called me worthless and lazy. I bit my tongue when he told me there were a million other girls out there that were better, prettier, and worked harder than me. I nodded when he said I'd need to show some improvement by the end of the week or I'd be helping to fill the line at the unemployment office. I fought back tears as I stepped out from his office and got back to work.
I looked at the seating chart and noticed I already had a table. I looked up and saw a middle-aged woman sitting in a booth in the far corner. I took a deep breath to calm my nerves as I walked to the table to take the woman's drink order. I smiled politely as I greeted the woman, took her order, and promptly returned with the woman's choice of beverage.
As I placed the drink on the table, I was caught a little off balance. The glass overturned and the liquid spilled into the lap of the customer. It was all I could do to keep the tears from spilling as I apologized profusely and grabbed a handful of napkins for the lady to clean herself with.
Read between the lines
What's fucked up and everything's all right
Check my vital signs to know I'm still alive
And I walk alone
The woman was sympathetic and displayed a kind attitude about the situation. The boss happened to catch all the action that took place and another drink quickly replaced the spilled one. He also made apologies to the woman.
He then turned to me and proceeded to yell about my unworthiness and clumsiness and irresponsibility before pointing toward the door and saying those words I'd been dreading to hear.
"You're fired."
I could no longer hold back the tears. I turned to the woman and apologized again and ran for the front door. I got to my car before the sobs overtook my body. I fumbled with the keys before finally opening the door and practically throwing myself inside, slamming the door blocking out the world on the other side. I sat in the driver's seat drowning in my tears.
My shadows the only one that walks beside me
My shallow heart's the only thing that's beating
Sometimes I wish someone out there will find me
'Til then I walk alone
There came a knock at the window. I turned to see the woman from inside the restaurant standing there with a look of concern painted across her face. I rolled the window down and weakly smiled at her. She said nothing but handed me a card, pat my shoulder, and gave me a reassuring smile.
I watched her walk to her car before reading the card. She had written a message to me on the back of the card: "I've been there and know what it's like. Come see me and we'll work out a deal."
For some reason, her smile warmed me all over, but it was what was printed on the front of the card that stopped the tears from flowing and replaced those tears with a broad smile: Raine Joyner, owner and founder Raindance Studios.
Maybe sometimes dreams do come true.
lyrics © "Boulevard of Broken Dreams" by Green Day