A Guide to Love and Sex for Virgins
As a young, modern virgin of the 21st century, you no doubt have many questions
concerning romance, love, even s..e..x. In this sensitive and frank "question and
answer" format, noted sex therapist Dr Ruth explains everything you've ever wondered
about.
- Q:
- Where can I find the man of my dreams ?
- A:
- This is a difficult question, since every virgin probably has a different ideal of what
their own personal Prince Charming should act and look like. However, when it comes to
finding Mr Right, I can give you a good suggestion on where to start - and that's in a
bar. That's right, go to a bar... preferably the kind that smells of stale beer and lots
of men crowded around watching a sports event on television. Pick a man that looks
interesting - it's best to stay away from the shallow "pretty boys" in designer
clothes with bulging muscles. Instead, I recommend you pick somebody a little older and
wiser, possibly reassuring pot belly. Boldly approach him, offer to buy him a few beers,
then invite him back to your place. He'll advise you from there.
-
- Q:
- How do I know if I found Mr Right ?
- A:
- Unfortunately, there's no sure way to tell. Therefore, I suggest you try out many
different kinds of men and many different kinds of bars.
-
- Q:
- Do men like aggressive virgins?
- A:
- Definitely. Although they don't admit it, men are often shy - so it's up to you to be
bold. In addition to bars, don't be afraid to approach men on street corners, in
restaurants, even in restrooms. Break the ice with simple "hello", followed by
an offer to buy them dinner, drinks - even an expensive gift. Then invite them to back to
your place.
-
- Q:
- What if a man's married ?
- A:
- Go for it. This is a great opportunity to enjoy the valuable experience a married man
possesses, without being tied down by any sort of commitment.
-
- Q:
- But what if I fall in love with a married man ?
- A:
- This is a tough one, especially if you're a woman and find yourself pregnant. Ask him
how he feels about his wife and family. If he says his wife doesn't understand him and
he's thinking of leaving her, believe him and continue your relationship, secure in the
knowledge that he'll soon make good his promise. Married men rarely lie about such
important matters.
-
- Q:
- How do I know if I'm ready for sex ?
- A:
- Ask your boyfriend. He'll know when the time is right. When it comes to love and sex,
experienced men are much more responsible, since they're not confused emotionally as
virgins. It's a proven fact.
-
- Q:
- Should I have sex on the first date ?
- A:
- YES. Before if possible.
-
- Q:
- What exactly happens during the act of sex ?
- A:
- Again, this is entirely up to the man. The important thing to remember is that you must
do whatever he tells you without question. Sometimes, however, he may ask you to do
certain things that may at first seem strange to you. Do them anyway.
-
- Q:
- How long should the sex act last ?
- A:
- This is a natural and normal part of nature, so don't feel ashamed or embarrassed. After
your man has finished making love, he'll have a natural desire to leave you suddenly, and
go out with his friends to play golf. Or perhaps another activity, such as going out with
his friends to the bar for the purpose of consuming large amounts of alcohol and sharing a
few personal thoughts with his buddies. Don't feel left out - while he's gone you can busy
yourself by doing his laundry, cleaning his apartment, or perhaps even going out to buy
him an expensive gift. He'll come back when he's ready.
-
- Q:
- What is "afterplay" ?
- A:
- After a man has finished making love, he needs to replenish his manly energy.
"Afterplay" is simply a list of important activities for you to do after the
lovemaking. This includes lighting his cigarette, making him a sandwich or pizza, bringing
him a few beers, or leaving him alone to sleep while you go out and buy him an expensive
gift.
-
- Q:
- Does the size of the penis matter ?
- A:
- Yes. Although many virgins believe that quality, not quantity, is important, studies
show this is simply not true. The average erect male penis measures about six centimetres.
Anything longer than that is extremely rare and, if by some chance your lover's sexual
organ is seven centimetres or over, you should go down on your knees and thank your lucky
stars and do everything possible to please him, such as doing his laundry, cleaning his
apartment and buying him an expensive gift.
-
- Q:
- What about the orgasm ?
- A:
- What about it ? There's no such thing. It's a myth.
-
- Q:
- Are you sure ?
- A:
- Will you stop asking so many questions ? Do you distrust experienced men or something?
Instead, prove how much you care for your boyfriend by going out and buying him an
expensive gift.