The Joint Family System


    For thousands of years men lived together as one and shared everything they had but slowly that changed and men began to have possessions. Personal possessions gave rise to pride and in turn again gave rise to still more possessions. To cut a long story short man could not tolerate his neighbour and just had to be alone to prevent further quarrels and now, in the twentieth century man just cannot tolerate anyone, even his own relatives, siblings and parents. Each one has to do his own thing for the world to survive and that's the only way they can survive. Each one being a law unto himself, he cannot tolerate the other persons point of view and doesn't even want to hear it. So he sets out on his own into a solitary world where he can do what he wishes but unfortunately cannot attain the happiness he had hoped to acquire, instead, he is plunged into a quite, solitary world which drives him to desperation, bitterness, pride, hate and the fatal sins of sex. Alas, if one had too only realize that happiness resides partly in human relationships. A man living with his wife, children, brothers, sisters, mother, father, grandmother and grandfather has numerous relationships, juxtapose this to a man who lives with himself and has only one relationship. In the former if one relationship suffers a fall there are many more that will supply love and recognition to the man, while the lone man has only himself to talk to and he cannot ascertain the status of the tasks he carries out i.e. whether they are good or evil, excellent or poor, sane or crazy, because it always takes two points to determine a line or a direction. 

Somebody once asked a stoopid question; 

If we are here to love others then what are others here for ? 

        Suppose a society is composed of ten people and each person instead of serving himself serves others. Now we have each person loved by the remaining or each person is loved by 9 others. In this same society if each man loves himself then he has only one person that loves himself and then, what good is a love that loves oneself ? Living together in a big family has numerous advantages. The main advantage being that confidential human relations increase and the individual becomes more balanced and more restful, he also gets attention and is not likely to attempt weird and dangerous things to gain attention. If there is any sorrow it is absorbed by many and not just by one. Joys are amplified by everyone celebrating them. Children grow up in a balanced atmosphere where there is no room for peculiarities and abnormalities. Little babies and children are easily taken care of by "familiar people" in the absence of their parents. If one person is wrong he has to stand against many and thus all extremities are automatically removed. When people do not have brotherly and sisterly contact with the opposite sex they swing to the opposite extreme and indulge in sexual crimes and deviant sexual practices, this, here, is completely removed because of the numerous sibling contacts with people of one big family. Due to the many human relations many diseases of the body and the mind are done away with and the individual is more healthier and less likely to fall prey to sickness and also depression, lack of confidence and the like. Besides the family can live on an extremely low budget because of the economies of scale.


All throughout history one would see families with at least five children and typically seven or eight children and it was not uncommon to find families with twenty or more children. Each member of the family would react closely with other members of the family and there was a distinct hierarchical system with parents as the head and the older siblings looking after and guiding the younger ones. This family worked as one tight unit like a smoothly oiled machine. There were hundreds of benefits to be obtained from this type of a set up, the main one being a balanced mind.

  Since the members of the family were sure to be of both sexes any member would have at least two relations or links to a member of the opposite sex as in a brother or a sister. Thus he would know how to deal with the opposite sex and feel at home when dealing with members of the opposite sex outside the circle of his family. He would look at outsiders as extensions of his own family. 

Since the number of the members was large. Any member of the family would always have someone to talk to and seldom if never suffer from loneliness and depression, which is the chief cause of problems in the world today.

  The member of such a family was insured of the help and assistance of the all other members of the family. He could seek advice and counsel and support from the other members.

A joint family would stay in any place because it was a self contained unit and the members were not likely to get bored because there was more activity with more members.

A very powerful feature of the joint family is the caring for children and grandchildren. Since the family is big it need not be the mother alone that cares for the little ones but all the uncles and aunties and indeed all the other members of the family. In the days of yore one could not distinguish which child belonged to whom as all the little ones were commonly looked after by all the adults and older siblings.

  Not only were there joint families units but entire tribes lived as one big family. One of the reasons why Jesus was lost at the temple was because Mary and Joseph thought he was somewhere around the tribe. One can imagine the faith and confidence the members had in each other.

  One would argue that it would take a lot of money and resources to keep a joint family going. But nothing could be further from the truth – take the following example:

 

Let us imagine that there are 6 members in a family. Two parents two boys and two girls. They live in a big two storied cottage with ample rooms. Let’s say the value of this bungalow is $50,000 If they try to separate and buy new homes after marriage they will each be spending $ 30,000 to $ 50,000. totally spending some $ 200,000 amongst themselves besides that, various inconveniences come to light. The children will be lonely because they do not have cousins to play with. They become unhappy and withdrawn and turn to machines like the television and computer to keep them company. When the children are babies at least one parent has to look after them continuously unlike in the joint family where someone or the other will look after the kids even finally - the grandparents. The grandparents themselves will be in better health and will definitely live longer.

  In short, the economies of scale come to light. If a bulb can shine for one person it can shine for 10 and 20 with the same intensity.

  Although there was more work there also were more people to do that work. For e.g. the daughters would help the mother in cleaning, dusting, washing, cooking, ironing, needlework and knitting and the sons would help the father in external jobs like looking after the livestock, mending the roof and other parts of the house, menial jobs, planting and harvesting the crop, defending the family from harm and many other physical tasks.

The dawn of the new era or the Renaissance gave rise to the nuclear family system. This was caused by the increase of free thought which in turn gave rise to pornography and free-sex. Sex was now looked upon only as a means of enjoyment and was portrayed as the ultimate reason for mans existence. At the same time the woman was being liberated, with the result that chivalry slowly died out and the woman had a mind of her own. The new age saw the rise of the cinema and printing technology increased dramatically as did the cost of living. The woman was now portrayed as an object of desire and the woman lived up to this image. Now, what mattered most was not the intellect or the honesty but simply the face and figure of the woman. The woman took this cue and developed her outsides to be acceptable in society. Thus after marriage she had to maintain her outward looks and  contd...

  The family is where everything begins. If the family is broken or not sound it gives rise to unstable and partially insane human beings. Rules, regulations, habits, way of life, values, mores all these are learnt and practiced in the home first. Take away the family and you take away the basic framework of society and in its place come disgruntled rebellious humans bereft of discipline or rules. When a mass of these human beings come together they create problems in societies and sometimes in extremes culminate in war.