Beginner's Wish
Chapter 1

"Like most stories, not all of them have a happy ending. In this case, neither does mine."

"So tell me, why now?"

"It was time to tell you I figured. I curse the day it all started while at the same time, I pray to have it back again, just to live that day again, an hour of it even!"

"Why do you say that?"

"You will never understand why I say that, or the other things I am about to say. No one really knows how you can feel in any situation unless you are actually in that situation."

"I don't think I quite follow you there."

She had to laugh. At the same time she smirked at this man across from her. He could never understand how she felt. He could never feel the same passion she felt when she was with him. He was the only one that cared more about her than he did himself. So why does this man ask her how she felt after all this time? After all, he was a stranger to her now.

"You know I care about you, Tifa." He said placing his hand on her arm trying to charm her.

He made no further attempt to comfort her or even touch her in any other way. Just by the look on her face it showed every feeling of discomfort, so he removed his hand. She stared out of the only window in the dark, gray room. Snow fell softly outside without a sound, a silent wonderland.

"You donít know the meaning of caring for someone. You never did, and you never will."

He sat back leisurely in his chair crossing his legs and stared at her through peering eyes. He examined her carefully. His eyes were now cold and totally drained of feeling.

"Well? You were the one that wanted to talk. Not me. I was living fine until you came back into my life." Tifa then again shook her head.

"It was time to tell you the truth. Don't you want to know the truth?"

"Yes-s." he stuttered back. This was not expected.

"Then sit there and I will tell you what my life has been like from the time you abandoned me. Then maybe you will realize that I too could have lived a 'fine' life."

The man in the room looked her over again.

"You've changed."

"So have you." she replied cleverly.

"Get on with your story now. I donít think I have time for this."

She stood up and walked over to the window leaning over the sill taking her time. It was cool to the touch and chilled her pale, bony arms. She had not been taking care of herself.

"Very well then."

From that moment on, Tifa spoke not feeling her lips moving all the while. She told her secrets, fears, dreams, and of the story never told before to anyone. The story experienced by two people. She being one of the two.

"Like I said, it was the day you abandoned me this all began. This calamity bestowed upon me. It was like a curse bound to happen to vulnerable people like me."

She still stared at the falling snow as she spoke making no attempt to face him. Even though it had been such a long time ago, not one day had passed when she didnít think about how things could have been prevented or even altered. And thus, she drifted into a deep and unbreakable daze reciting her perfectly prepared story remembering it all the way through from every detail right down to the day it all happened. The man sat in his chair unaware of the amazing facts about to be dealt to him later on during that session. His worst nightmares would come true, and his most painful wounds would be reopened exposing him to every emotion all over again. He had come such a long way from those permanent wounds hoping they would one day be forgotten. Now it was thought that maybe she was going to pour salt into those wounds, was that her main intention? Or was this just a reminder that the past always following you no matter where you run to, it will always be there, and one day you must face it. This was his day.

"Go on." He gestured.

"Tell me now if you are really ready to listen. If not, I can always come back another time-"

"No. Really, go on. I would like to hear this."

Tifa moved from her spot at the window still not taking her eyes off the snow. It was so deeply attractive, far more than this tiny stuffy room.

"Good. I have waited for this time when you would finally be able to accept the truth and all its consequences."


"Oh yes. Consequences are to be expected."

"Just get on with it, Tifa!" he stammered his hand on the coffee table separating them. She felt the floor shake.

Her eyes made a quizzical look and her lips formed a twisted smile. A smile of content. This is what she wanted.

"Now you know the impatience I felt with you, but picture the impatience far more frustrating and lasting much longer!" She said leaning in towards him gripping a tissue in her hand the smile quickly fading.

He rolled his eyes at her and moved his hands over his lips yawning signaling to her he was bored. She leaned back into her seat knowing she wasn't getting anywhere.

"Here it goes. Listen carefully because I will not repeat anything."

"Yeah yeah yeah."

"Pitiful." she mumbled.

Chapter 2